I hate him, you hate him (if you have any taste), and I guess I’m not steeped in the annoying “fitness celebrity’s” legend enough to have any idea what the inside jokes might mean. That won’t be corrected any time soon. I do know that the tool has better hair than Trump, better cleavage than Hillary, and he looks mega manly carrying a mutley little dog around in a video with production values that scream “1985” from the cheesy logo to the slow-mo evil laugh to the electric shock sound effects. If this isn’t the worst short ever made, it’s close.

Every production that has Steven Seagal in it still tops this one for sheer obnoxious narcissism, though.