I was supposed to come along on the interview and (s)meet the great man myself, but MK waited until right before it happened to let me know the when and where. Thus was the prospective third wheel unable to attend. Coincidentally.

Watch as Smeats’s millionth recounting of the kick he delivered to Kafeel Ahmed at the Glasgow airport crackles with romantic tension, culminating in his own invitation to her to come to Scotland so he might properly “set aboot” her. No foolin’. It’s all lovingly captured in Townhall’s patented Crap-o-vision, which I’m pretty sure involves a camera obscura with a layer of gauze taped over the pinhole. Click the image to watch.