Ohhhh, that meat’s red. Crazy red. It’s got Thomas Jefferson and pirates and the Marine Corps hymn and the caliphate and forgiveness for one’s enemies, but not Al Qaeda, which needs to be smashed on a rock (paraphrasing). Tender, juicy, chicken-fried steaky red meat.

Exit question: Is there an Internet exception to the “equal time” rule? I can’t find a definitive answer online, but I’m assuming there must be. Otherwise why would ABC give him a platform when he’s widely expected to be weeks away from declaring?