I’m not a huge fan of the age of super-flashy, ever-changing sports uniforms. I like some. I hate others. But, mostly I just like my boys to wear red and black with silver britches and look good, like they do. There’s comfort and class in your team taking the field looking like your team. While I’m at it, I like my stock cars to have the same main sponsor and basic design every week, too, but I digress. Let us take a moment to examine the new University of Maryland football uniforms for this weekend, courtesy of Under Armor. They’re so patriotic, they might as well have a slow-motion screaming eagle GIF on the front of them.

They’re designed to commemorate the 200th anniversary of the Battle of Baltimore in the War of 1812, which inspired the poem that became the Star-Spangled Banner, so it’ll be nice at the very least to have the football-watching public Googling that while they watch the game Saturday:

That is to say the Terps will wear uniforms with the cursive script of Francis Scott Key’s poem “Defence of Fort McHenry,” which later became our national anthem, emblazoned on its helmets and jersey sleeves. Key composed the poem after watching American troops defend Fort McHenry against the British Royal Navy’s bombardment on the night of Sept. 13, 1814, during the War of 1812.

Maryland’s helmets will feature an outline of the star-shaped Fort McHenry and an image of the flag that flew through the night during the Battle of Baltimore. According to the school release, the 15-star and 15-stripe flag is the only flag in American history in which the blue field is touching a red stripe. The uniforms highlight this detail with red and blue stripes on the helmet, shoulders, pant legs and socks.

Gawker thinks this example of old-timey script and martial history overtaking our uniform design is all apiece of our hypermasculine culture and national identity which is the cause of all our other woes or something, so feel free to get on board for that reason even if you don’t like the design. Sure, this could be hokey, but the specificity of the tribute makes it smart and interesting. Probably a little busy for some people, but the whole look is pretty classy.

On a bad news week for football, there are plenty of players in the sport’s ranks who are still out there being decent people. Via Glenn Beck, this clip of J.J. Watt talking about what he’ll do with his new millions is pretty great:



As is this ongoing story of redemption and loving thy neighbor in the NFL:

CINCINNATI — Devon Still continues to have the feel-good story in professional sports.

Late Monday, the Cincinnati Bengals announced via their website they were donating all proceeds from sales of Still’s jersey to pediatric cancer research.

Less than 24 hours later, a team official told ESPN.com that more of the defensive tackle’s black No. 75 jerseys had been sold in that time span than any jersey featuring any other Bengals player ever.

Ever?

“Ever,” Jeff Berding, the Bengals’ director of sales and public affairs, said. He didn’t have an exact number of sales at the time.

Still was also signed off the practice squad to the active roster Monday, according to his agent, Drew Rosenhaus.

Still is the defensive lineman who was cut by the Bengals two weeks ago, when the team had to reach its 53-man roster limit, before later being welcomed back as part of the practice squad. Coaches originally cut him because injuries had derailed some of his playing ability in the preseason.

They also could tell he wasn’t fully invested in football while dealing with the stresses of the Stage 4 cancer his 4-year-old daughter, Leah, is currently battling.

She’s been given a 50-50 chance at surviving.

Exit question: Condi for commish? Well, if there’s one way to bring a microscope and the utmost press attention and demands for accountability to bear on an organization, it’s to put a Republican in charge.