Norm Coleman tragically injured while ferreting garbage out of a dumpster

Anyone believe this? No?

Okay. Just wanted to make sure we’re all on the same page.

Sen. Norm Coleman (R-Minn.) returned to Capitol Hill this week with a prominent gash on his forehead after he was knocked nearly unconscious back home in St. Paul while — of all things — dumpster diving…

“I was digging in the dumpster,” he deadpanned.

Reacting to the “oh-dear, bless-his-heart, a-dumpster-diver” expression that I couldn’t hide, Coleman explained he was looking for an “antique lamp” that his wife had somehow thrown in the dumpster behind their house in St. Paul. They’re doing “major reconstruction on the house,” Coleman explained.

He was vague about what exactly whacked him in the head. (His office explained later that it was “a piece of wood.”) But whatever it was, the impact was so hard that he “saw stars.” Senator Coleman considers himself a lucky man that he didn’t pass out in the dumpster in the freezing St. Paul temps.

A loose of piece of wood somehow attained sufficient velocity — inside a dumpster — to cut his head open and nearly knock him unconscious. Uh huh.

Let’s think. Do we know of anyone with an inclination towards violence and a motive to lay a 2×4 across Norm Coleman’s skull?

Why, yes. Yes, we do.