First and foremost, the victim blaming must stop. Often it seems there is almost a presumption that those who get harassed must have done something to invite it, which leads too many victims to stay silent. Actress Mayim Bialik thought this was the time to discuss the virtues of “not being a perfect ten” or being someone who hasn’t had plastic surgery or who avoids flirting with men. (She apologized.) Donna Karan also had to apologize for suggesting that women are “asking for it.” How insulting to victims. There are laws in this country. Wearing a short skirt doesn’t violate them. Shoving one’s tongue down an employee’s throat does.

Second, let’s get real about the options that harassment victims face. “Report it!” we say. “You have rights!” Easy to say; much harder to do. The thing that keeps harassment targets quiet, in my view, is not that they do not know their options. It’s that they know their options stink.

Go to HR? HR may have to tell the harasser–and he may survive the bout.