President Trump’s speech in Alabama Friday night lasted one hour and 23 minutes. A transcript of his remarks runs just over 12,000 words.

To say the speech wandered all over the lot is an understatement. Of course, Trump covered the Alabama Senate race — he was in Huntsville was to campaign for candidate Luther Strange — but he also discussed, in order: 1) the United Nations; 2) the recent hurricanes in Texas, Florida, and Puerto Rico; 3) North Korea; 4) the GOP’s failed effort to repeal and replace Obamacare; 5) the 2016 election; 6) Mitch McConnell; 7) John McCain; 8) the beauty of the White House; 9) wife Melania’s footwear when visiting hurricane victims; 10) his own political clout and whether supporting Strange was wise; 11) the defense budget; 12) NAFTA and other trade deals; 13) Luther Strange’s height (6 feet 9 inches); 14) White House chief of staff John Kelly; 15) drugs brought into the U.S. from Mexico; 16) the proposed border wall; 17) the Border Patrol; 18) religious liberty; 19) the Second Amendment; 20) the Electoral College; 21) Hillary Clinton’s 2016 strategy; 22) the Russia investigation; 23) the filibuster; 24) China; 25) the stock market; 26) the Veterans Administration; 27) his cuts in federal regulation; 28) NASA; 29) immigration; 30) taxes; 31) healthcare premiums; and 32) making America great again.