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S.P. Chan

Why I’m not having kids

My mom was a senior manager at a global stem-cell bank when she retired. While my brother and I were growing up, she worked part-time. I’ve heard her say more than once: “If I had just had another 16 years, I could have gone so high.”

Am I being selfish if I don’t have children?

I’m selfish for not committing to my hypothetical child’s well-being. But I will have a lot more attention and money to shower on real-life nieces, nephews, mentees and philanthropic causes.

Also, not having a child is the most important thing I could do to reduce my carbon footprint, according to a 2009 study by Oregon State University statisticians. (Of course, like all parents, I believe my theoretical child would have grown up to become a brilliant physicist and saved the world from global warming, so this is a moot point.)

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Two things: Nearly everyone I’ve known who was trying to convince me that they didn’t want kids was really trying to convince themselves. People who really don’t want kids just don’t have them.

And second, this attitude is obviously more common on the left. But why is it that members of the left that support policies that depend on the next generation to pay for seem so unwilling to help create the next generation? Medicare, Social Security…and now the basic design of Obamacare is to force young people who don’t really need health insurance to get it anyway to help pay for older people who do. As far as I’m concerned, if you support these programs, it’s your duty to submit to the cost and struggle of raising children to help pay for them. But since I don’t want lefties to breed and have no interest in keeping these programs sustainable, I tend not to make much of an issue of it.

Mullaney on February 1, 2013 at 12:17 AM

More carbon for the rest of us!

Shy Guy on February 1, 2013 at 12:28 AM

Living for your job is no way to go through life. What a miserable existence.

besser tot als rot on February 1, 2013 at 12:38 AM

And her career is in journalism?! Hahahahahahahahahahaha! That’s what’s so important? Hahahahahahahahaha!

besser tot als rot on February 1, 2013 at 12:44 AM

I remember reading the Daily Mail, where this childless 27-year-old had to fight to get her tubes tied, because she knew exactly how her life was going to be in her 20′s by golly.

One responder to the article said something along the lines of, “Be seeing you soon. I am the finance person at a fertility clinic. We see women like you change your minds or re-marry to someone who *does* want kids, and now need to have IVF because of the tubal ligation you got in your twenties.”

Sekhmet on February 1, 2013 at 12:47 AM

In 15 years, will you be expecting Obamacare to fund your desperate attempts at fertility treatment?

Steven on February 1, 2013 at 1:00 AM

I love it when liberals try to evaluate having a child in light of practicality and global warming crap. It just means they won’t be breeding more liberals.

jediwebdude on February 1, 2013 at 1:13 AM

And second, this attitude is obviously more common on the left.

Mullaney on February 1, 2013 at 12:17 AM

She’s not pure left yet. If she were a true narcissist, she would be advocating the ban of all children.

John the Libertarian on February 1, 2013 at 1:17 AM

I pray more libs like her decide to not have kids.

Come to think of it, this culture of death, abortion, and selfishness among libs might work out real well for us, assuming they don’t destroy the country first.

A couple of months ago I had friends who are a lib couple telling me how they had decided not to have kids. I replied, “Good. I’m glad. I don’t think you should either.” The looks were priceless.

goflyers on February 1, 2013 at 1:24 AM

And if her mother had risen higher at work, how would she be remembered today (assuming that she is not still with us). Most of us face a similar fate. We will never have a chance to leave an imprint larger than we will have on our own children, for good or bad. No one will remember me for how much I made, but my children will know that I loved them enough to bring them into the world and raise them to be responsible adults. Compared to the opportunity to have higher work status, or a byline in a big newspaper or a national news syndicate, I know which one I’d choose.

flataffect on February 1, 2013 at 1:34 AM

I also found this a little bit…bizarre:

We talked about it for five months. In the car on the way to work. During dinner. For five minutes, for 30 minutes. After seeing nephews and nieces.

I wanted it to be a decision we made, not one made for us by chance or time.

I know nothing about this particular woman and how long she’s been married, but my wife and I talked about kids before we got married. If we hadn’t been in agreement, we would not have gotten married.

At any rate, this quote makes me think that the conversation more likely involved her husband wanting kids, and it took her 5 months to finally convince him that it isn’t going to happen.

Mullaney on February 1, 2013 at 1:49 AM

Also, not having a child is the most important thing I could do to reduce my carbon footprint

Liberalism, the AIDS of Civilization. So sad.

Feedie on February 1, 2013 at 2:15 AM

Its always funny to watch liberals rationalize their greed and self absorbtion as altruism.

tommyboy on February 1, 2013 at 3:57 AM

How sad these people are. Neither of my two children were planned and when we found out, both times I was overwhelmed with the stress of having taking care of another human being in such a capacity. But I have no regrets. My children are the best thing to have ever happened to me. I love them both dearly. Carbon foot print be damned. We own this planet.

jawkneemusic on February 1, 2013 at 4:02 AM

Why? Is it just some kind of strange leftist need to spend money on things they don’t need or will ever use?

Dollayo on January 31, 2013 at 11:26 PM

you mean like high speed trains?

Quisp on February 1, 2013 at 6:12 AM

Also, not having a child is the most important thing I could do to reduce my carbon footprint,

Stopped reading right there. Glad this one is not procreating.

Odysseus on February 1, 2013 at 6:15 AM

This is the responsible decision for her. After all, having children means responsibility for raising them. Which is expensive. She works for a newspaper, which is the fastest dying industry in America. Odds are her highly paid job of writing drivel any 8th grader (not in government school) could write likely wont survive to see any child of hers off to Kindergarten.

wildcat72 on February 1, 2013 at 6:47 AM

There’s nothing wrong with not having kids per se, but when you have to write a big public article about it, obviously something on the inside isn’t quite right.

thebrokenrattle on February 1, 2013 at 7:25 AM

Libs do not need to have children they plan on brain washing our kids.

Every time I hear about people not wanting kids I can only think of Idiocracy.

Grunt on February 1, 2013 at 7:32 AM

If not having kids is good for the planet, what exactly are we saving the planet *for*? The monkeys? The fish? The trees?

This deep-seated self-loathing liberals having for humans is really troubling.

It’s the “just enough of us, way too many of you” mentality…on steroids. And that NEVER ends well.

englishqueen01 on February 1, 2013 at 7:41 AM

How disturbing is it when you see that the draw of the Cult of Global Warming is so powerful that some people are willing to forsake one of their most basest instincts?

p0s3r on February 1, 2013 at 7:46 AM

Well,
If she’s really concerned about her carbon footprint, then she needs to quit using up so much electricity writing this crap.

Reduce her carbon footprint by living under a bridge. Scrounging in trash bins at McDonalds, etc.

Yeah, lots of ways to reduce her footprint.

Now, if I was a Liberal, I’d suggest she reduce her carbon footprint by just jumping into a river and floating down to the sea and become food for various carnivores. But I’m not a Liberal.

ProfShadow on February 1, 2013 at 8:13 AM

I’m blessed with a wonderful daughter, and couldn’t begin to imagine my life without her. The writer will certainly be missing out on something far more fulfilling than being successful in her professional career – but that’s certainly her choice.

Hill60 on February 1, 2013 at 8:48 AM

Why I ~~’m not having kids~~ don’t understand what life’s about.

Paul-Cincy on February 1, 2013 at 9:01 AM

I think Ashley Judd wrote that .

Lucano on February 1, 2013 at 9:32 AM

not having a child is the most important thing I could do to reduce my carbon footprint,

Poor dear…something’s not right in the head.

lynncgb on February 1, 2013 at 9:49 AM

I don’t have kids, so that I can you all as my children through nanny government!!

Axeman on February 1, 2013 at 9:52 AM

Where to start? I was this person when I was 30. Happily married, no interest in being a parent, ambitious in my career. Always finding reasons to wait to have kids. And when I finally did get pregnant after 9 years of marriage at age 35, quite by accident, I had a horrible beginning with severe nausea and two hospitalizations. The troubled pregnancy ended up costing me my job when I was just 2 months away from delivery and was closing on my first house. I ended up unemployed for a year and pretty broke.

I could have just thrown in the towel and said, boy, it sure looks like I am just not meant for motherhood and it’s ruining my life.

Thank God I didn’t do that. Although my career was certainly shifted to a lower gear because I went through with that child and then had another (cost me another job, too) I have never, ever regretted it. My biggest regret now is that I waited so long to have kids and didn’t have more at a younger age.

I have drilled both of my kids that they should marry young and have a lot of kids. They don’t have to “give up” anything and they will “get” more than anything they might give up anyway.

rockmom on February 1, 2013 at 10:02 AM

I feel for her husband when she hits her low-carbon and childless mid-40s.

rogerb on January 31, 2013 at 11:19 PM

Why? She’ll probably find he’s increased carbon footprints behind her back with another woman half her carbon footprint. He’ll be in an unsustainable situation, much to his carbon credit.

mintycrys on January 31, 2013 at 11:26 PM

Now THAT is funny!

Bulletchaser on February 1, 2013 at 10:04 AM