Write your own inaugural speech
The essential (and crippling) difference between Obama’s trajectory and Reagan’s is that the latter’s strategy succeeded economically. Indeed, it would not have succeeded politically if it had failed economically. But there is very little chance that Obama’s economic policy will work at all, let alone so well that the increased revenue it generates will be sufficient to bridge the fiscal gap outlined above. In those circumstances, Obama will face two sets of spiraling costs: the rising costs of the entitlement programs and the higher interest costs of his increased borrowing. And that combination is a rising tide that swamps all boats.
How will the president cope with such discouraging trends? Well, he might say sternly that he, for one, will never join those nattering nabobs of negativism who count America out. Or he could perhaps venture that where others see gathering storms, he sees beyond them to the sun breaking through the clouds onto the mountain tops. Or, if things look really bleak, maybe he will resort to the Dictionary of Quotations.
A Talleyrand gem should do it. When a French revolutionary asked him how to win converts to his new-and-improved religion, the wise diplomat replied: “Nothing simpler. Get yourself crucified and rise again on the third day.”
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Some of my opponents will say…
[ ] Let crippled children die in a fire
[ ] We shouldn’t care about the sick and elderly
[ ] Arm everyone with RPGs and kill women, children, and puppies
[ ] All of the above
…but I say, that’s not the America we deserve.
The Rogue Tomato on January 22, 2013 at 4:29 PM
“I won. Have a nice day …”
ShainS on January 22, 2013 at 4:38 PM
I did this some time ago…
The Barak Obama Do It Yourself Speech Kit:
Preamble: this must consist of varying portions or iterations of the following; [Place in any order you choose]
“Folks are hurtin’.” [This must be said with feeling, to show caring.]
“We have to invest in the future.” [Translation; Spend Spend Spend!]
“We need a balanced approach.” [Remember, this means Tax Increases so make it sound reasonalbe.]
“My hope and expectation is that we can put country before party and get something done for the American people.”
[This is the crux of the speech, this is where it is emphasized that any disagreement is tantamount to Treason.]
[At this point it is important to have an agenda list that will consist of proposals. Use the following skeleton to introduce each of the agenda items.]
— Obama Introduce a Subject on the Agenda —
“Some would say…” [Insert here a quotation of something No One ever says.]
“let me be perfectly clear…” [This is the place for obfuscation about the subject and any position regarding the subject.]
“We cannot simply just…” [This is where you mention something that would the exact solution to the problem and the American People know it, i.e. "we cannot simply just drill for all the oil we need."]
“make no mistake about…” [Here is where the Exact Opposite of any of the things which are to take place are stated.]
“I reject the false choice that some would…” [Again, reiterate quotations that No One has ever said followed by Him vs. an idiotic extrapolation of any Republican position.]
“I have ordered my team to…” [Doesn't matter what actions you fill in here, they aren't going to do it.]
— Repeat as needed for new subjects —
Then, in closing you must include a reference to the Bush Administration and “The Failed Policies of the Past.” that we cannot go back to.
jaydee_007 on January 22, 2013 at 4:41 PM
“ObamaCare will stand for a 1000 years!”
BobMbx on January 22, 2013 at 4:42 PM
How soon can we expect corporations to change their names a tad, from “Company” to “Collective”, i.e; the “Coca-Cola Bottling Collective”, from “Microsoft” to “Peoples Software Collective #4″, and of course, the biggie: “The Collective States of America”
Resistance is futile.
BobMbx on January 22, 2013 at 4:47 PM
“I can`t believe you bought all that again!“
ThePrez on January 22, 2013 at 4:55 PM
jaydee_007 on January 22, 2013 at 4:41 PM
That is excellent!
theblackcommenter on January 22, 2013 at 5:05 PM
I have a dream to crucify those who act in self-defense against one who, if I had a son, would look like him; I have a dream that those who arrest an older person who looked like my father, if I ever saw my father, would be smeared as “acting stupidly”. I have a dream of $1+ trillion deficits as long as the eye can see, and calling those who balk at that divisive, mean, angry, and hateful. I have a dream today.
Paul-Cincy on January 22, 2013 at 5:17 PM
“Hahahahahaha, chumps! Think that $1.4 Billion of your money that Michelle and I spent last year keeping ourselves and our kids and our friends living large was excessive? You ain’t seen nuttin’ yet! Now that I have more flexibility to loot the Treasury, it’s party time! Hahahahahahaha . . . suckers!”
AZCoyote on January 22, 2013 at 5:42 PM