Bad inventions
(1) SILENT DISHWASHERS
Are people installing dishwashers next to their beds? I’ve checked my “Top 500 Daily Irritations” list and dishwasher noise is not on it.
What possible benefit derives from having a dishwasher that makes absolutely no noise? Was that gentle whooshing sound driving some homeowners bonkers? Is this a product designed by the same people who gave us the electric car, a vehicle so silent that the first sign of its approach is the sound of your pelvis breaking as the car hits you?
Not only are the virtues of a silent dishwasher elusive, but there’s one big disadvantage: You can’t tell if it’s running. A dishwasher doesn’t have to sound like the Concorde blasting off to provide some indication that the thing is working.
Now, in addition to the usual steps of washing dishes — loading the dishwasher, inserting the cleaning agent and turning on the machine — the fancy new quiet dishwashers demand yet another step of the homeowner: You have to hang around and keep putting your ear against the door hoping to hear activity. If you forget to perform this bonus time-waster, every once in a while you’ll start unloading dishes the next morning and notice that they’re still dirty.
The whole point of having a dishwasher is to minimize the work involved to get clean dishes. The dishwasher is a product that’s devolving.
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Any more evidence required to know that Ann Coulter is insane?
astonerii on January 3, 2013 at 6:30 PM
Ugh, This is like George Will’s blue jean article. Paul Reiser’s act wasn’t good when HE was doing it. So stop it.
MechanicalBill on January 3, 2013 at 6:35 PM
Have to disagree on touch-free faucets, soap dispensers, and hand-driers. You know where most travelers are coming from when they use these things? Urinals & toilets. I’m no Felix Unger, but even touching airport bathroom door handles is kinda icky.
Ladysmith CulchaVulcha on January 3, 2013 at 6:39 PM
Ann Coulter circa 2012-13 is further proof that women who have never married or reproduced go batsh!t crazy when their womb reaches its expiration date. She’s as crazy as Maureen Dowd now.
wildcat72 on January 3, 2013 at 6:48 PM
I adore my silent dishwasher, which is in a “great room” area. Dishwasher noise was a problem. This is where I listen to my radio and watch TV. You can tell the dishwasher is running because you can see the little blue lights on the top of the door, you moron.
Fallon on January 3, 2013 at 6:50 PM
Seems she still hasn’t gotten over the Romney-Christie train wreck to her career.
Thomas More on January 3, 2013 at 6:50 PM
What’s a land-line phone?
And I love my silent dishwasher, too.
James on January 3, 2013 at 6:56 PM
For sure. I want to mute the phone to go to bed. I don’t want to go through some complicated menu … I want to just hit a button! Is that too much to ask.
Paul-Cincy on January 3, 2013 at 6:58 PM
Probably because her mansion is large enough that she can always be far away from the kitchen if she wants to. And are we supposed to believe that she ever runs her own dishwasher? Doesn’t her maid take care of that for her? Does Ann ever eat at home anyway? From the looks of her, one would think she hardly eats at all.
Pervygrin on January 3, 2013 at 7:00 PM
That makes no sense. Crazy because she phoned in a column?
changer1701 on January 3, 2013 at 7:03 PM
Now embarrassed that I validated anything Ann said on a thread roundly condemning her.
Paul-Cincy on January 3, 2013 at 7:04 PM
I once walked out of a mens room without washing my hands. When someone commented on my apparent lack of hygiene, I simply remarked, “My d-ck was the cleanest thing in there!”
CurtZHP on January 3, 2013 at 7:07 PM
This is the kind of stuff I’d expect the ‘bats on the View to be talking about.
Keep your hands off my quiet dishwasher lol, it’s in an open area and I don’t want to hear it.
Wanderlust on January 3, 2013 at 7:08 PM
Notice how she avoids politics in her first column after her boyfriend made an ass out of himself.
Mark1971 on January 3, 2013 at 7:09 PM
Over in one comment.
Oil Can on January 3, 2013 at 7:09 PM
I tell my wife and kids to be quiet while washing dishes.
portlandon on January 3, 2013 at 7:19 PM
She’s dating another Democrat?
Fallon on January 3, 2013 at 7:20 PM
Hey, I like Ann Coulter. But I have to admit to silent dishwasher envy. Anyhoo, she forgot to mention those mega-high-decibel, ear-drum busting, automatic flush toilets which go off like grenades before you have a chance to either exit the stall or put your fingers in your ears.
As for bleepety bleep warnings for brain dead idiots, my recently purchased hair-straightening iron with a top temp of 450 degrees came with a warning: Do not to use while sleeping.
Buy Danish on January 3, 2013 at 7:31 PM
Think of it as a reconnaissance mission.
Buy Danish on January 3, 2013 at 7:32 PM
What – no Cristie Creme cheerleading column???
Resist We Much on January 3, 2013 at 7:34 PM
That would be CHristie Creme….
Resist We Much on January 3, 2013 at 7:34 PM
ITT: serious seriousness
Jeddite on January 3, 2013 at 7:41 PM
i’m taking bets on how long its going to be before ann comes out with a book titled
“if republicans had any brains, they’d be democrats”
renalin on January 3, 2013 at 7:43 PM
Took a lot of searching to find a phone with a simple “ringer off” switch, but I finally found a cheapo trimline phone that fit the bill just fine.
whatcat on January 3, 2013 at 7:49 PM
I have a 20+ year old phone with a mute button that lights up a red LED when pushed. I keep all my other digital phones within earshot muted. So I press a button to turn off the phone to go to bed.
We need to get together to create a mass-market mute button phone that clearly shows (like with an LED) when the phone is muted. We could call it “Mute Button, Inc”.
Paul-Cincy on January 3, 2013 at 8:11 PM
Okay, how did you do the blushing thing?
DrMagnolias on January 3, 2013 at 8:19 PM
And the other thing? You have magical powers.
DrMagnolias on January 3, 2013 at 8:20 PM
: oops : (but without any spaces)
There are others …
: lol :
: shock :
: eek :
And many others.
Not sure where you’d find them. Try google.
Paul-Cincy on January 3, 2013 at 8:23 PM
Headline threads allow such emoticons. Other threads don’t.
Paul-Cincy on January 3, 2013 at 8:24 PM
I know a little about putting in emoticons (although I haven’t done the big eyes one), but how do you animate them? There must be some super-secret code…
DrMagnolias on January 3, 2013 at 8:24 PM
Wowwie. So, I’m doing a grand experiment.
DrMagnolias on January 3, 2013 at 8:25 PM
You are Teh Awesome.
DrMagnolias on January 3, 2013 at 8:26 PM
You can use the “preview” feature to experiment, without actually subjecting everyone to it.
Paul-Cincy on January 3, 2013 at 8:28 PM
I know. I’m brilliant.
Paul-Cincy on January 3, 2013 at 8:29 PM
Oh, come now. No one’s reading the Coulter entries.
DrMagnolias on January 3, 2013 at 8:31 PM
Nah, the more emoticons, the better for everyone!
btw, GE phones frequently came with mechanical On/Off switches – I know this because I used to specifically look for that feature.
Anti-Control on January 3, 2013 at 8:35 PM
Sorry, I see that I misread your comment on previewing emoticons
Anti-Control on January 3, 2013 at 8:41 PM
With, well, everything, is this really all Ann can think to write about?
Count to 10 on January 3, 2013 at 8:42 PM
Probably. Ann has so little cognitive power I’m amazed she doesn’t spontaneously forget how to BREATHE. My favorite webcomic artist’s blog beat the hell out of her books, which by the way I have a set of that nobody will buy for even $1 apiece.
MelonCollie on January 3, 2013 at 8:52 PM
+1. The toilet in my wife college dorm apartment had one of those. I was afraid of the darn thing. Stand too close when you hit the handle and you could end up in the river! I swear it made my ears pop. It didn’t flush; it tore a hole in the space/time continuum.
CurtZHP on January 3, 2013 at 8:57 PM
This is almost as embarrassing as her hyping of Chris Christie.
Almost.
Norwegian on January 3, 2013 at 9:03 PM
Yup, gotta keep those ringing little suckers quiet.
whatcat on January 4, 2013 at 8:38 AM