Green Room

Schadenfreude: Suicide-bomb professor more successful than imagined

posted at 12:31 pm on February 10, 2014 by

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A group of Sunni militants attending a suicide bombing training class at a camp north of Baghdad were killed on Monday when their commander unwittingly conducted a demonstration with a belt that was packed with explosives, army and police officials said.

The militants belonged to a group known as the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria, or ISIS, which is fighting the Shiite-dominated army of the Iraqi government, mostly in Anbar Province. But they are also linked to bomb attacks elsewhere and other fighting that has thrown Iraq deeper into sectarian violence.

Twenty-two ISIS members were killed, and 15 were wounded, in the explosion at the camp, which is in a farming area in the northeastern province of Samara, according to the police and army officials. Stores of other explosive devices and heavy weapons were also kept there, the officials said.

Eight militants were arrested when they tried to escape, the officials said.

The militant who was conducting the training was not identified by name, but he was described by an Iraqi Army officer as a prolific recruiter who was “able to kill the bad guys for once.”

While we’re enjoying the schadenfreude of this little event, perhaps some of the recruits should be taking note of the entire premise of “suicide-bomb-making school.” What is that — another version of “those who can’t do, teach”? Maybe they should be asking why their instructors don’t do their own field work in the first place, eh?

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Comment pages: 1 2

I got: (Twenty)two tickets to Paradise. Pack your belt, gonna leave tonight.

Yikes, that’s 1,584 virgins needed in one shot, and it raises a lot of questions. Do the virgins get old? Do you get old? Presumably, as virgins, this is a single use concept, and therefore how do you know to space them out over Eternity, because that seems like a long planning window for your average arrested development adolescent brainwashee at martyr camp. Do they all get PMS at the same time? That’s a bad week for Achmed. Even if they don’t, 72 into a 28 day cycle gives a very frightening 2.5 raging Fatimas on average per day, every day, for the Rest of Time. Even if the streams run with honey as advertised, another problematic concept when you are feeling parched (what is the humidity in Paradise?), the whole 72 idea may not be so great, upon reflection. Maybe not so fast on the trigger…..

cosifantutte on February 10, 2014 at 4:53 PM

Talk about catching the high occupancy express lane to Hell

Libertyvillager on February 10, 2014 at 4:54 PM

“This is why you have the TA do the actual instruction” – Bill Ayers.

Herod on February 10, 2014 at 5:01 PM

This story reminds of the bit that Israeli comedian Israel Cambell used to do about the former one-eyed, one-armed “master bomb-maker” that was killed by the Israelis with a cell-phone. “I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that a one-eyed, one-armed bomber is not a ‘master bomber’. In fact, I’m going to say he’s probably not even a mediocre bomber. If he’s teaching the master class, I’m going to hold out for the section taught by the TA.”

smellthecoffee on February 10, 2014 at 5:02 PM

cosifantutte on February 10, 2014 at 4:53 PM

That’s why I say a few sluts who know what they’re doing would be a better deal…..

dentarthurdent on February 10, 2014 at 5:24 PM

cosifantutte on February 10, 2014 at 4:53 PM

Besides, does the koran say they’re all female virgins?
You might get a bunch of fat pimple-faced geeks who never left Mom’s basement while they were alive….
You know – like most of our libtard trolls.
Imagine THAT for eternity.

dentarthurdent on February 10, 2014 at 5:27 PM

Great. Now if Sandra Fluke could just demonstrate to her friends how to use an explosive diaphragm…..

NoPain on February 10, 2014 at 5:42 PM

I’m only disappointed our fellow commenter and friend Schadenfreude hasn’t weighed in. Seems like a gimme.

Bmore on February 10, 2014 at 5:48 PM

No video? Jeeez! Weasel Zippers has this kinda war porn all the time! Buncha camel jockeys sitting around a mortar:

“..Allahu akbar! Allahu akbar! Allahu akbar! Allahu akbar! ..KA-BOOOOOM!

..and the eventual shower of rag-head BPs. Or this.

The War Planner on February 10, 2014 at 5:50 PM

Presumably, as virgins, this is a single use concept, and therefore how do you know to space them out over Eternity

cosifantutte on February 10, 2014 at 4:53 PM

That’s the thing … they’re virgins and have to remain as such. Therefore omar jr. is in for an eternity of “look but don’t touch”. Sounds like a special kind of he11.

Lost in Jersey on February 10, 2014 at 6:11 PM

That’s the thing … they’re virgins and have to remain as such. Therefore omar jr. is in for an eternity of “look but don’t touch”. Sounds like a special kind of he11.

I’ve heard it described as they are magically re-virginized after each … session.

sumpnz on February 10, 2014 at 6:31 PM

This probably also means that there was some eager Jihadi standing outside a security gate banging on the button of an inert training belt. Until shredded by a .50 cal MG.

Ray Van Dune on February 10, 2014 at 6:46 PM

Heh — this thread is really funny. Thanks, everyone!

(Or maybe I should thank the professor?)

Splashman on February 10, 2014 at 7:20 PM

Sumpnz

But, but, that makes no sense! Then why do you need a 72-pack? Isn’t that like two cartons of Keystone Light? So confusing…

cosifantutte on February 10, 2014 at 7:25 PM

The virgins are a lot of Rosie O’Donnells.. Mixed with a few Nancy Pelosi’s age of 70.

The head virgin is a Helen Thomas clone.

Yeah, this is what they look forward to!

OregonPolitician on February 10, 2014 at 7:52 PM

The virgins are a lot of Rosie O’Donnells.. Mixed with a few Nancy Pelosi’s age of 70.

The head virgin is a Helen Thomas clone.

Yeah, this is what they look forward to!

OregonPolitician on February 10, 2014 at 7:52 PM

They leave that part out of the jihadi brochures. It’s on the website though … buried in the TOS.

Lost in Jersey on February 10, 2014 at 8:11 PM

Twenty-two ISIS members were killed, and 15 were wounded, in the explosion at the camp, which is in a farming area in the northeastern province of Samara,

W. Somerset Maugham’s retelling of the fable of the Appointment in Samarra comes to mind.

As does a multiple Darwin Award.

cheers

eon

eon on February 10, 2014 at 9:03 PM

Good News, Bad News at the Suicide-bomb School

First the Bad News: Prom Night Canceled

Good News: The 22 dead jihadist will each get a full page in the year book.

Wallythedog on February 10, 2014 at 9:51 PM

They leave that part out of the jihadi brochures. It’s on the website though … buried in the TOS.
Lost in Jersey on February 10, 2014 at 8:11 PM

As Hitchens used to say, “Read the fine print; every one of those virgins comes with a mother-in-law!”

Maddie on February 10, 2014 at 9:52 PM

Eight militants were arrested when they tried to escape, the officials said.

What were they arrested for? Disturbing the peas?

bettycooper on February 10, 2014 at 10:07 PM

Good

307wolverine on February 10, 2014 at 11:03 PM

Y’know that old saying, “Those who can’t do, teach”?

This professor was trying to prove it wrong.

Splashman on February 10, 2014 at 11:06 PM

Obligatory:

They blow up so fast!

Shy Guy on February 11, 2014 at 1:03 AM

The professor survived!

Shy Guy on February 11, 2014 at 2:43 AM

And boom goes the dynamite.

SoulGlo on February 11, 2014 at 8:38 AM

Class—dismissed dismembered.

Kennyraisin on February 11, 2014 at 8:48 AM

:) 72 virginians

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Seal_of_Virginia.svg

c4 on February 11, 2014 at 8:53 AM

Allahu akbar! = Allahu ickbar!

Bmore on February 11, 2014 at 9:21 AM

Comment pages: 1 2