Green Room

The Top Ten Reasons Hillary Must Be the Next President

posted at 6:49 pm on February 1, 2013 by

From the home office, in Wabasaba, Pennsyltucky.

The Top Ten Reasons Hillary Must Be the Next President

10.) Worked herself to exhaustion at State Department and clearly deserves a job where she can do nothing.

9.) Will play golf from the red tees, so Boehner won’t even have to pretend to talk to her.

8.) Not only shoots skeet, but according to Bill, has multiple recipes for cooking them.

7.) Chelsea not yet old enough to run.

6.) Guaranteed to double current office holder’s bowling score.

5.) Will reduce annual budget by never ordering pizza deliveries to West Wing.

4.) Proven tarmac dodging skills. ‘Nuff said.

3.) Will pick Biden for running mate again, just to see the look on his face.

2.) Nobody thought she’d reach the 500,000 frequent flyer miles threshold on the State Dept. rewards plan, but we’re locked in now.

1.) A quick survey has revealed that Hillary Clinton is actually the last woman left in the country. If we don’t do it now…

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