Green Room

Fish Are Friends, Not Food

posted at 1:54 pm on October 30, 2012 by

Yes, the presidential race is going to be decided in a week. I realize the storm on the East Coast is bad. But I wanted to bring you a story which epitomizes what happens to a state when liberals and unions run everything, and tax the rational people out of it, leaving behind, well, morons.

California has everything one could possibly desire – pristine climate, mountains, desert, beaches, entertainment. Did I mention climate? What we also have, thanks to Jerry Brown and the labor and teacher union-controlled legislature here preventing any attraction for job creators to stay in the Golden State, are lots of people from whom you’d uncomfortably move away if you met them in person.

Dina Kourda is one such person, and happens to live in the Southern California community of Irvine, scene of a tragic accident a week ago, claiming the lives of over 1,600 pounds of live fish. The former saltwater bass and now open air sushi spread were on their way to a local ranch market when the truck was involved in a three car collision. Names of the fish are being withheld until all next of school are notified.

Ms. Kourda has filed an official request on behalf of the People For the Ethical Treatment of Animals to put up a memorial street sign at the intersection to remember the dead. Not people, mind you. They all made it. She wants us to remember the fish who died here.

What would the proposed memorial sign say, you ask? From the Orange County Register report,

The sign would read, “In memory of hundreds of fish who suffered and died at this spot,” to remind tractor-trailer drivers of their responsibility to the animals who are “hauled to their deaths every day.”

Ms. Kourda’s letter continues, “Research tells us that fish use tools, tell time, sing, and have impressive long-term memories and complex social structures, yet fish used for food are routinely crushed, impaled, cut open, and gutted, all while still conscious. Sparing them from being tossed from a speeding truck and slowly dying from injuries and suffocation seems the least that we can do.”

One can come up with an ocean of humorous responses to this letter, and Ms. Kourda does not address the rampant fish on fish crime plaguing the world’s oceans. But one thing is absolutely certain. Somebody has spent a little too much time watching Finding Nemo on DVD.



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They can be friends and food. Just like dogs, direct your questions to the White House.

Axion on October 30, 2012 at 1:56 PM

Research tells us that fish use tools, tell time, sing, and have impressive long-term memories and complex social structures

LOL- This women has never been fishing or she would know how common it is to rehook the same fish within minutes..

melle1228 on October 30, 2012 at 1:59 PM

Research tells us that fish use tools, tell time, sing, and have impressive long-term memories and complex social structures

Use tools? Tell time? SING?????

ROFL!!!

Bitter Clinger on October 30, 2012 at 2:05 PM

Sorry, Duane-O. I’m on Ms. Kourda’s side on this one.

[waiting for VegConservative's support]

bmmg39 on October 30, 2012 at 2:06 PM

I propose after evacuating all sane people from the state of CA over the next 180 days we chop off CA and let it fall into the ocean.

It’s more humane that way.

Turtle317 on October 30, 2012 at 2:08 PM

Sequel wanted: “Eating Nemo.”

22044 on October 30, 2012 at 2:11 PM

Heck no Turtle. Let the remaining morans consume themselves and we rush back in and enjoy some sweet ocean front golfing, surfing , etc. It is nice weather out there after all.

DanMan on October 30, 2012 at 2:14 PM

Heck no Turtle. Let the remaining morans consume themselves and we rush back in and enjoy some sweet ocean front golfing, surfing , etc. It is nice weather out there after all.

DanMan on October 30, 2012 at 2:14 PM

You mean Umbrella Corp is there? Then by all means, let the T-virus outbreak begin!

I’m so full of myself it hurts….

/

Turtle317 on October 30, 2012 at 2:17 PM

Research tells us that fish use tools

WTF? Really?

I’m going to have to say, given the number of trolls (even on HA), that ‘tool use’ is becoming much less important of a distinguisher of intelligence for me.

GWB on October 30, 2012 at 2:21 PM

Ms. Kourda’s letter continues, “Research tells us that fish use tools, tell time, sing, and have impressive long-term memories and complex social structures…

“Fish” is code for Obama voters. Makes more sense that way…

Ok, other than the long-term memories.. and complex social structures. And yeah ok, liberals don’t get tools. And true, I have no proof they can tell time.

But some of them can sing. Not as many as they think, but some.

Ok, maybe “fish” is code for fish.

DrDeano on October 30, 2012 at 2:27 PM

The Stupid, it burns!!!!!!!

mkm19602000 on October 30, 2012 at 2:31 PM

Mentally ill people should be given all the help in the world.

DeathtotheSwiss on October 30, 2012 at 2:31 PM

Mentally ill people should be given all the help in the world.

DeathtotheSwiss

I would settle for them not being elected to Congress.

Hard Right on October 30, 2012 at 2:40 PM

Tell that to the eagles and the bears.

Steve Eggleston on October 30, 2012 at 2:41 PM

Singing fish?
http://wlrnunderthesun.org/2011/09/songs-of-seduction-under-the-sea/

Hard Right on October 30, 2012 at 2:42 PM

Mentally ill people should be given all the help in the world.

DeathtotheSwiss on October 30, 2012 at 2:31 PM

But we shouldn’t let them breed. Sterilize all liberals!

PrettyD_Vicious on October 30, 2012 at 2:42 PM

Fish using tools.
http://news.discovery.com/animals/fish-uses-tool-110929.html

I’m not defending the loon, but it isn’t entirely wrong. It’s a stretch to call it singing and you see how it’s rare for fish to use tools.

Hard Right on October 30, 2012 at 2:45 PM

I would also like to point out this is hardly evidence that fish are intelligent, sentient creatures.

Hard Right on October 30, 2012 at 2:51 PM

They’re obviously sentient, though I’m tired of that word being used to deny the rights of, for instance, unborn human animals. Intelligence is a different scale. I certainly hope none of you who uses “intelligence” as the criterion as to how to treat an animal…eat pork.

bmmg39 on October 30, 2012 at 2:56 PM

Remember, they’re not fish. They’re sea kittens!!

crazy_legs on October 30, 2012 at 3:02 PM

Remember, they’re not fish. They’re sea kittens!!

crazy_legs on October 30, 2012 at 3:02 PM

Conveniently, I’m on the ALF diet (just don’t tell AP).

Steve Eggleston on October 30, 2012 at 3:04 PM

If I were a Republican CA legislator, I’d call for summary approval.

Let Californians peer down the slippery slope on which they’re dancing.

HitNRun on October 30, 2012 at 3:08 PM

I certainly hope none of you who uses “intelligence” as the criterion as to how to treat an animal…eat pork.

bmmg39 on October 30, 2012 at 2:56 PM

A salesman traveling through the farm country stops at a farmer’s house as night approaches, with no motels or towns in sight. The farmer agrees to put him up for the night.

The next morning, as he readies himself to depart, he sees a pig in the barnyard with 3 legs. He turns to the farmer as he comes out of the house, and asks, “What’s the story with the three-legged pig?”

The farmer puts his thumbs behind the straps of his coveralls, spits a bit of chaw off the porch. “Well, that there is a special pig!

“About a year ago, my wife was out slopping the hogs when she started to have a heart attack. That pig rolled her over so she wouldn’t suffocate in the mud, then hopped the fence, pushed his way through the screen door, and got my attention so I could dial 911. Saved the wife’s life.

“Then, later that summer, the barn caught on fire. That there pig pushed open the barn door, and saved my horses and cows. Heck, he even turned on the water faucet.”

The salesman looked aghast at the farmer. “Wow! That’s incredible! But, how did he lose the leg?”

The farmer spat another hunk of chaw and said, “Well, you don’t a pig like that all at once!”

GWB on October 30, 2012 at 3:24 PM

The farmer spat another hunk of chaw and said, “Well, you don’t eat a pig like that all at once!”

GWB on October 30, 2012 at 3:24 PM

*facepalm*

GWB on October 30, 2012 at 3:39 PM

That joke appeared in a multi-page greeting card, GWB. I thought it beautifully demonstrated the lack of logic some have when it comes to animals. The other joke-card I saw in that series involved Jesus thinking he had met his earth-father in Heaven, only to learn that it was Pinocchio’s father.

bmmg39 on October 30, 2012 at 3:43 PM

Ms. Kourda’s letter continues, “Research tells us that fish use tools, tell time, sing, and have impressive long-term memories and complex social structures,

Someone needs to tell her “The Incredible Mr. Limpet”
was a fantasy film, not a documentary.

mrt721 on October 30, 2012 at 4:10 PM