Green Room

Barack Obama: Scatologist in chief

posted at 12:24 pm on May 25, 2012 by

Move over, Lenny Bruce. A new master of the scatological has emerged on the scene. His name is Barack Obama, and he dishes out dirt. A regular Cloaca Professional he’s become.

Matthew Continetti, writing about the president’s rapidly unraveling re-election team at The Washington Free Beacon, states that “one gaffe is an isolated event. Two is an embarrassment.” I submit that the same may be said of a verbally anal retentive administration’s inability to resist talking about excrement.

On Thursday, the day after White House Propaganda Minister Jay Carney accused the GOP of slinging “BS” by claiming that the Obama administration was guilty of profligate  spending, the ever-hilarious president told a crowd in Iowa that candidate Mitt Romney had presented voters with a “cowpie of distortion” when he made similar claims.

Obama, always at the ready to crack wise at the expense anyone who disagrees with him, haughtily told 2,500 prospective voters at the Iowa State Fairgrounds that Romney, who had visited the same venue 10 days earlier, “left out some facts. His speech was more like a cowpie of distortion.” Hoots of laughter rose to the ceiling of the Knapp Center.

The president actually knows a good bit about distortion. This clip from Thursday’s Special Report with Bret Baier features a sound bite from a speech in which the president said with a straight face:

My opponents won’t admit it, because it runs contrary to … I guess, the only argument they have, but since I’ve been president, federal spending has actually risen at the lowest pace in 60 years.

The reference takes its cue from the same fanciful article that fueled Carney’s off-color putdown. The premise of that article is that if you count emergency spending as a regular fixture of any administration’s budget, then Obama—by perpetuating federal relief programs begun under George W. Bush—has arguably spent less than his predecessors. The question that arises is why anyone would fall back on such a bizarre calculus. It is the same “logic” that Obama used to explain the trillions of dollars he was saving the nation in 2010 by not extending the surge in Iraq into perpetuity.

Putting the current fiscal conflagration in terms familiar to the president, he is knee-deep in the “mess” he inherited because he has added immeasurably to it.

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Obama, always at the ready to crack wise at the expense anyone who disagrees with him, haughtily told 2,500 prospective voters at the Iowa State Fairgrounds that Romney, who had visited the same venue 10 days earlier, “left out some facts. His speech was more like a cowpie of distortion.” Hoots of laughter rose to the ceiling of the Knapp Center.

The president actually knows a good bit about distortion. This clip from Thursday’s Special Report with Bret Baier features a sound bite from a speech in which the president said with a straight face:

My opponents won’t admit it, because it runs contrary to … I guess, the only argument they have, but since I’ve been president, federal spending has actually risen at the lowest pace in 60 years.

The reference takes its cue from the same fanciful article that fueled Carney’s off-color putdown. The premise of that article is that if you count emergency spending as a regular fixture of any administration’s budget, then Obama—by perpetuating federal relief programs begun under George W. Bush—has arguably spent less than his predecessors. The question that arises is why anyone would fall back on such a bizarre calculus. It is the same “logic” that Obama used to explain the trillions of dollars he was saving the nation in 2010 by not extending the surge in Iraq into perpetuity.

Putting the current fiscal conflagration in terms familiar to the president, he is knee-deep in the “mess” he inherited because he has added immeasurably to it.

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Yeah, the biggest BSer-in-Chief evuh is the undisputed expert on cowpies and a master of distortion. When I read the term from his Iowa speech it immediately called to mind those corny phrases Colonel Potter on M*A*S*H* used to holler when he got exasperated:

Monkey muffins!
Cow cookies!
Buffalo bagels!
Pony pucks!
Mule fritters!
Beaver biscuits!
Buffalo chips!
Bull cookies!
Horse hockey! (my fave)

So as Obuffalobagels drags his “busload of bushwah” around while he campaigns through the heartland, he and his WretchedHive clowns can borrow from the Colonel to add some pizzazz to their rantings.

stukinIL4now on May 25, 2012 at 1:57 PM

stukinIL4now on May 25, 2012 at 1:57 PM

He was clearly trying to ingratiate himself with all those Iowa farmers that he looks down his nose at.

Addition to your list: Road apples.

Howard Portnoy on May 25, 2012 at 3:17 PM

Won’t it be good to have a First LADY in the WH again?

vityas on May 26, 2012 at 12:49 PM

I’ve found Obama quite repulsive for some time now but his latest foray into scatology is beyond repulsive…from a guy in the Presidency.

If North Korea ranted about feces, I’d say, “oh, well, there they go again” and if someone in Nigeria did, same reaction by me…but a U.S. President (in this case, Barack Obama) lapsing into this language?

It’s beyond repulsive by Obama. He’s lost whatever mind he had left.

Lourdes on May 26, 2012 at 1:47 PM

Won’t it be good to have a First LADY in the WH again?

vityas on May 26, 2012 at 12:49 PM

Yes, I share your sentiments there.

Lourdes on May 26, 2012 at 1:47 PM

stukinIL4now on May 25, 2012 at 1:57 PM

He was clearly trying to ingratiate himself with all those Iowa farmers that he looks down his nose at.

Addition to your list: Road apples.

Howard Portnoy on May 25, 2012 at 3:17 PM

That doesn’t explain Obama’s gleeful statement that he “scoops the poop” when asked about, oh, what was that, national security or the deficit?

This latest “cowpie” crud isn’t the first time creepy little Barack has let loose his scatology. Guy seems to be keyed into poop in keeping with his toilet training years.

Lourdes on May 26, 2012 at 1:49 PM

Prezzy cowpie will know a lot of govt and military secrets when he moves from our house after Nov. Hope Mitt changes the locks.

Kissmygrits on May 26, 2012 at 5:36 PM

That whole segment of his speech which ended with the “cowpie” comment, coupled with his tittering at his own “joke”, was pathetic. I understand he can’t say “bullshit” but at least that would have an emphatic impact, versus his lame joke. He sounded like a bad comic starting to sweat when the audience doesn’t laugh, waiting for the hook to pull him offstage. He’s a bad president starting to sweat when the public doesn’t buy his “act” anymore. Better watch out, Barry. The hook is a-comin’.

tpitman on May 26, 2012 at 5:57 PM