Green Room

Teen who reportedly ate only chicken nuggets since age 2 hospitalized

posted at 1:10 pm on March 20, 2012 by

It’s a story that needs to be taken with a grain of salt, no pun intended. The Sun reports that a British teenager whose mother insists has eaten “practically nothing” beyond chicken nuggets since age 2 recently collapsed and was rushed to a hospital struggling to breathe.

Judging from her pictures, 17-year-old Stacey Irvine looks pretty healthy. But according to the news report, the girl, who is a factory worker(!), was diagnosed with anemia and swollen veins in her tongue. During her hospital stay, Irvine was injected with vitamins.

Irvine, who claims she has never tasted a vegetable or fruit, was told “in no uncertain terms that she will die if she carries on like this” her mother, Evonne, told reporters.

It breaks my heart to see her eating those damned nuggets. I am at my wit’s end. I’m praying she can be helped before it’s too late.

The mother maintains that her two younger children eat normally, and that she’s tried depriving Stacey of food to force her to expand her dietary horizons—which so far have reportedly been extended only as far as “fries and toast.”

In its own report on the incident, the website Take Part asks whether her mother’s lassitude toward ensuring that her daughter received minimal levels of health-sustaining nutrients for 15 years of her life constitutes parental abuse. I would venture to say that in the U.S. in this day and age, it probably would.

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Never tasting a fruit or vegetable is child abuse. From that point if she’s past the age of consent in Britain, pronounce, bury, move on. Can’t fix stupid. If we could we would never have any of those wonderful J@ckass episodes or most of television for that matter.
Kid came into work bumbed. Said one of the members of that stupid show was killed in a car wreck or something. I tried condolence instead of condescension but I’m weak. “Huh, they get video?”
Give her plenty of dipping sauce.

onomo on March 20, 2012 at 1:40 PM

I’m sorry, but I have trouble believing that this isn’t just some set-up stunt for a reality TV show. Because this story is just too idiotic on too many levels to take seriously.

Tom Servo on March 20, 2012 at 2:04 PM

I’m going to call fake on the story.

redeye on March 20, 2012 at 2:25 PM

But, does she know how long it takes to drive 80 miles at 80 miles per hour?

Fallon on March 20, 2012 at 3:18 PM

But, does she know how long it takes to drive 80 miles at 80 miles per hour?

Fallon on March 20, 2012 at 3:18 PM

Depends on how well your tires are inflated and whether it’s faster than a one mile run in 7 minutes if you’re in shape. Also, always just cut it in half.

ebrawer on March 20, 2012 at 4:49 PM

But, does she know how long it takes to drive 80 miles at 80 miles per hour?

Fallon on March 20, 2012 at 3:18 PM

Well, it depends on the size of the tires.

The Notorious G.O.P on March 21, 2012 at 2:31 AM

I was standing in line at McDonalds yesterday, as a short wide woman ordered the 10-piece McNuggets meal “and a cheeseburger on the side”.

She was a bit over five feet tall, well over 200 pounds, and would probably have ended up malnourished without that “cheeseburger on the side”. Because, you know, McNuggets are not enough.

J Baustian on March 21, 2012 at 11:12 AM

Never tasting a fruit or vegetable is child abuse.

Is it though?

If this is the reals her parents are weak-willed idiots… At least force her to try the Spicy McChicken!

WeekendAtBernankes on March 21, 2012 at 3:15 PM

BTW you know those nuggets grow right off the backs of the chicken. They just cut ‘em off and toss ‘em in a fryer. Oh and the chickens don’t have heads, they’re directly attached to a feeding tube.

Worst of all, there is this giant blob chicken they get their patties from. They just cut a patty’s worth off and it grows back.

Believe me, please, or just sign this clipboard right here and give me a $35 donation… Every month.

WeekendAtBernankes on March 21, 2012 at 3:17 PM