How can someone be so cold?

posted at 7:50 pm on March 8, 2010 by Cassy Fiano
[ Abortion ]    printer-friendly

I haven’t written about the abortion tweeter, Angie Jackson, yet. I’ve been thinking about it. I’ve watched the video a couple of times and let it simmer. It bothered me, but really, what’s so different about her than the writers at just about any feminist blog out there? What’s so different about her than, say, Gloria Steinem in this shirt:

Frankly, Angie is acting in typical behavior for a liberal. Liberals love to talk about “risky” or “taboo” things, and then pat themselves on the back for being courageous. This is basically the exact same thing. She says she isn’t doing it for a publicity stunt? She’s doing it to “de-mystify” abortion? Please. She wants attention, pure and simple. Some women may indeed be scared to have abortions, but watching Angie Jackson talk about having one isn’t exactly going to lead scared women to a moment of pure enlightenment and relief. This is another typical feature of liberalism. Their narcissism leads them to think that everything they do inspires someone, or encourages someone, or is somehow meaningful or special. In real life, it isn’t. No one cares about Angie Jackson, and they wouldn’t even know she existed were it not for this controversy she created.

But before I get into my other thoughts, let’s watch the videos. First, here’s the actual abortion video:

Now, here’s Angie talking more about her decision on CNN:

IF she is being honest about her medical situation, then I certainly feel sympathy for her. What an awful choice for a woman to make — to choose between your life or your unborn child’s. What bothers me isn’t even so much the choice she made. What bothers me is how cold she is about it. She says, over and over again, that she isn’t sorry, that it’s not that bad, that it’s not scary, that it’s OK, blah blah blah. She even said that it’s just like having a miscarriage. And here’s where I got angry. I’m going to explain why now, and in doing so, I’m going to confess to something that only a select few people in my life know about.

I had a miscarriage several years ago. I was not married, although I was engaged. Our engagement did not work out, and we didn’t get engaged because I was pregnant. We didn’t even know until after we already were engaged. I miscarried, and I was devastated. Absolutely crushed. Nick and I were young, our relationship was shaky, and we certainly didn’t have a lot of money. We weren’t planning on having kids right away, but the accidental pregnancy changed everything. I was still happy and excited, even though it wasn’t at the right time at all. It wasn’t what I expected, but I was going to be a mommy, and I had a baby growing inside me. Losing that baby was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to endure. I kept it a secret from everyone but my ex-fiance for a long time — I’m not really sure why, but I didn’t want anyone to know.

And that’s why Angie’s cavalier position on abortion, and miscarriages, made me so angry and upset. Almost every female friend I know has had at least one miscarriage as well, and every single female friend I know that has had a miscarriage was just as devastated as I was. It was horrible, heartbreaking, yet Angie is sitting there saying abortion “isn’t that bad… just like a miscarriage”?? I can understand that she made the choice she felt she had to make. But was there no sadness? No sorrow at the loss of the child she might have had? No anger at the injustice of it? She just killed her child, and that’s that, no big deal, just like having a miscarriage? I just don’t see how someone can make such a heart-wrenching decision, choosing between their life or their unborn baby’s, and do it with absolutely no heartache or hurt or sadness at all. I’ve known friends who have had abortions, too, and they grieve for their loss just as we who have miscarried babies do. If anything, I think they feel worse. Angie shrugs it off like she was throwing out some trash. And that is appalling to me, that is what I’m completely incapable of understanding. You would think that the decision to have an abortion would be one of the hardest decisions a woman would ever have to make. I am pro-life, and I find abortion a horrible, horrible atrocity. My heart still goes out to the women who think that they have no other choice and have to endure it. Yet Angie encourages women to just do it because “it’s not that bad”. How can someone be so cold?

I’ve got a newsflash for you, Angie. There are thousands upon thousands of women who miscarry and have abortions, and they don’t look at it like it’s no big deal. It’s not easy and simple for them. It breaks their heart; they weep and grieve and feel the loss of their child. I still do, and it is years later. I may have tons of children in years to come, but it will never make up for the fact that one is missing. One child that is supposed to be here isn’t. And whether that happens by miscarriage or abortion, many, many women feel the same way I do. Just because our children had not been born it doesn’t mean that we didn’t love them. Telling women that it will be OK, and that you’ll do it and be fine — just like cold-hearted, emotionless Angie — is wrong. It doesn’t help anyone. If anything, it could potentially hurt women. They’ll look at that video and think that it’s no big deal, and then later, feel like their entire world has come crashing down.

Making women think that abortion is no big deal, and comparing it to a miscarriage, does not do women any favors. Most women are not so cold and unfeeling. And there are plenty of feminists, plenty of abortion lobbyists, who would try to convince women that abortion is no big deal, just like Angie is trying to convince women.

Take it from me: losing your unborn child is a big deal. And women deserve to know the truth of how this will affect them emotionally. To tell them otherwise is just another lie by cold, heartless pro-choicers.

Cross-posted from Cassy’s blog. Stop by for more original commentary, or follow her on Twitter!

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