The Indisputable Genius of Michael Moore
posted at 9:27 am on November 30, 2009 by Track-A-'Crat
It’s too early for this.
After a wonderful Thanksgiving, an unadulterated serving of Michael Moore is perhaps the biggest system shock possible. He is the antithesis of everything represented by Thanksgiving, manifested in human form.
We’re all aware of his incessant verbal diarrhea. The guy can’t help it. Get him started on anything related to politics, no matter how tenuous the link, and be prepared for an avalanche of anti-logic that even Rep. Alcee Hastings would struggle to match.
Moore’s latest political revolution is to have published an open letter to The One on his website, aiming to use his considerable sway with those millions of people who mistake his fictional movies for fact, and base their vote on that most firm of foundations.
I’m loathe to give his intellectual musings the oxygen of publicity, but I’ve rarely read such a prolonged brainfart. Usually when people commit sustained incoherency to paper, they tend to realize it through a process known as “proof-reading.” Then, having recognized the gibberish that they’d previously considered literary gold, they normally have the good sense to hit “delete.” But not Moore, who takes as much pride in the vitriolicness of his words as in their irrationality.
The letter reads like the ramblings of an angry toddler. It’s littered with inane talk of “corporate backers”, “haters” and the like, takes a swing at Obama as “We can’t take your caving in, over and over” (quite where he got that impression from I’ve no idea – health care? Cap’n’tax? Porkulous?), and, displaying the total myopia common to all true believers, states that “When we elected you we didn’t expect miracles.” Rrrrrrright.
Best of all, though, is the race-baiting undercurrent that no Left-wing argument worth its salt ever lacks:
You would still be the victim of their incessant venom on hate radio and television because no matter what you do, you can’t change the one thing about yourself that sends them over the edge.
Real subtle, Moore. You might as well have followed that sentence with the Left’s unofficial motto, Because Republicans are RACIST, just to make it even more clear.
Incredibly, he then proves that he’s not only a titan of political philosophy, but also one of the foremost experts on terrorism, via his claim that,
I know you know that there are LESS than a hundred al-Qaeda left in Afghanistan!
I know that you know that I know that you know you’re full of it, Moore. Less than a hundred al-Qaeda terrorists left in Afghanistan? And he knows this how, exactly?
Oh, that’s right – facts do not matter in Bizarro world.
Moore rounds off his masterpiece by exhorting Obama to once again retreat, promising that if he does so, then,
You can be your mother’s son.
Which makes about as much sense as the preceding entirety of the letter. That right there is surely going to form the central plank of Obama’s surrender-with-honor strategy, when it comes: we’re ditching Afghanistan, because “I want to be my mother’s son.” Flawless reasoning.
Democrats, your next presidential candidate awaits anointment.