The issue that faces us all…

posted at 9:58 pm on July 27, 2009 by MadisonConservative

In these trying times, Americans face perils from every direction. The recession is affecting all aspects of life, from prices, to confidence in job security. Subsequently, crime is rising due to desperation, and dissociative societal cognizance dysfunction, or something like that. For conservatives, the woes are even greater. While we toil away the hours trying to convey our concerns to our countrymen, we are beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish, and the tyranny of evil men. Additionally, we struggle against the machinations of the mighty tactical machine that the Obama cabinet has constructed, with unearthly powers like tax evasion and underage ogling. My friends, these dire circumstances toss us onto the hot plate; into the boil; on the frying pan, dangerously near the fire, and other such culinary colloquialisms. This is not the moment for idle miscalculation.

So, it is with this in mind, that I have chosen to gather you ’round the campfire to discuss a reality we must all confront, if our efforts are to journey further than our proverbial front lawn. Every step we take into the cave of doubts galvanizes our resolve, while challenging our fortitude! It is only that which does not vanquish us, which makes us stronger! Heed my words, brothers and sisters! This is not something to be furtively approached! What we, all of us, must comprehend, is the terrifying and devastating nature of signing our name at the end of our posts!

I hear you. You’re saying to yourself “MadisonConservative, you wily, dastardly rogue! You’ve truly cast a buckeye at a wasp’s nest, haven’t you?” Perhaps. Perhaps it takes one willing to slice the rutabaga to see the menace lying wistfully beneath our feet, waiting to strike like a hummingbird. Indeed, to dismiss such an instance would be simple. After all, what harm is there in a few extra keystrokes? To that I would respond, it was a few extra keystrokes that might have made Hitler a data entry specialist, rather than a dictator! Some may blithely scoff at my insinuations, but I assure you, redundancy is a thief! It robs us of precious seconds that could make all the difference between a timely, well-written response, and an obsolete, antiquated lump of sputum that dares to call itself text.

Good citizens, if you wanted your real name to be attached to your words, why did you not register with a login that would resemble your illustrious moniker? If it was taken, a mere bit of punctuation might have averted needless repetition! If you did not want your real name attached to your words, then why would you possibly add it at the end?? This…this is madness!

Madness…no…THIS IS HOT AIR!!!!!

- MadisonConservative AKA Aloysius Mbutu

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