A Republican Platform for 2010 Emerges
posted at 10:41 pm on June 18, 2009 by Doctor Zero
A campaign platform for the Republicans in 2010 is taking shape. Much like the successful “Contract With America” of 1994, it has a catchy central theme: “What America Can No Longer Afford.” We can hope that, unlike the Contract With America, the Republicans stay focused on their campaign themes after riding them to victory, and make smart strategic choices while implementing them.
Here are some things America can no longer afford:
Politicians who sign bills they haven’t read, and do not understand: We can illustrate this point with clips of Joe Biden casually admitting he doesn’t understand the “stimulus” bill he was put in charge of implementing, and seeming untroubled by the notion of taxpayers getting ripped off by stimulus scam artists. Republicans should promise the voters to present clear, concise legislation, polished through robust debate, instead of sloppy billion-dollar spending binges shoved down congressional throats in a matter of days.
Bankrupting the future to pay for lunatic schemes: Mountains of debt are being piled onto our financial system, threatening to crash the bond market. We deserve better than ridiculous, unworkable spending fantasies from our leadership. Obama’s health care proposal isn’t a legislative agenda – it’s the ravings of a delusional madman, and it’s an insult to the taxpayers to suggest they should seriously consider it. Obama’s “plan” dumps another trillion dollars of debt onto an exhausted, stagnant economy, to fund a statist pipe dream that would increase costs, explode demand, and leave working Americans with less health insurance. This is no less insane than a penniless vagrant running into a luxury car dealership and loudly declaring his “plans” buy a new BMW with the lint in his pockets. Republicans can promise not to waste the voters’ time with expensive fantasies.
Abuse of the public trust: We don’t need “leaders” who spend their time slandering inconvenient investigators, or hiding their flagrant waste of precious taxpayer money behind secretive classifications. We don’t need lectures on the desperate state of the economy from a man who promises he can personally fix everything… right after he gets back from his million-dollar night on Broadway. Republicans should pledge both austerity and transparency to the voters. A government that demands huge amounts of our income, to resolve problems it helped to create, should address us as our humble and dedicated servants, not our feudal overlords. If we want to see glamorous airheads amass fortunes by feeding us ridiculous lies, then swank around in fabulous wardrobes for a swarm of adoring press sycophants, we can watch “Access Hollywood.”
Neurotic liberal obsessions: America has wasted billions of dollars respecting the primitive liberal religion of our elites. We have no more money to fritter away on global-warming witch doctors and multi-cultural palm readers. We have no loose change to squander on “green” shell games or “carbon credit” lottery tickets. Republicans should pledge to develop America’s natural resources, and begin a rational policy for implementing nuclear power. We’ve had enough of cavemen pointing at pictures of the hydrogen atom, or absurdly inaccurate weather models, and hooting in fear. Our offshore oil reserves will eventually be exploited. It’s just a question of whether the oil rigs will be flying American flags.
Political interference in the economy: We can no longer sustain the corrupt closed loop of Democrats rearranging the economy to enrich their favored constituents, who repay them with fat campaign contributions. Every American has been robbed by the United Auto Workers union, for more money than most of us have in our bank accounts, over the first half of this year. We can no longer afford to let power brokers meeting behind closed doors attempt to rewrite the laws of supply and demand, while pulling exorbitant fees from our bank accounts to pay for their “services.” We need government to disengage from the free market, in order to serve its proper regulatory purpose. We require professional economists with total commitment to capitalism and the free markets in our Treasury department, not political hacks who believe their job is to figure out how much cash they can siphon out of the market without killing it altogether. Republicans should pledge to respect the freedom, and collective wisdom, of the voters, and make it clear they see their role as enhancing the stability and security of the marketplace. Their job is to give businesses and consumers the confidence to build a more prosperous future, not design the future and force the populace into their appointed roles at gunpoint.
Silence in the face of tyranny: We are the defenders of freedom, not mute spectators to oppression. The peaceful future of the world hinges on the universal acceptance of every person’s right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Those words were not written for Americans to recite to each other. Our duty is to shout them into the darkness of communism, theocracy, and the other vicious systems men have designed to enslave each other. Our fathers defeated evil on a global scale, and we inherited a responsibility to call evil by its right name, wherever we see it. Republicans should pledge that no one struggling to raise their neck from beneath a tyrant’s boot will need to strain their ears to hear the voice of America.
Corruption of our electoral system: Americans have been asked to make painful sacrifices to address a frightening economic crisis. They have been told they need to sacrifice their freedoms, and mortgage their futures. They have the right to expect that every hand outstretched to take their money belongs to a fairly, honestly elected representative. Voter fraud and intimidation are unacceptable outrages, and Republicans should pledge to prosecute them aggressively and relentlessly. No organization under investigation for voter fraud should receive a single penny from the government.
Playing politics with national defense: In a time of war, we cannot afford to allow political hacks like Nancy Pelosi to smear our intelligence community. In a time of breathtaking victories against terrorism, our military leaders deserve better than to be treated like uppity peasants by Barbara Boxer. We have not forgotten Democrat leaders declaring defeat while our troops were still engaged in the field, hoping to demoralize the public for partisan political advantage. We have not forgotten prominent Democrats referring to American troops as Nazis. Republicans should pledge to keep petty politics out of national defense, and remember that civilian oversight of the military does not make civilian leaders better than the soldiers sworn to respect their authority. American soldiers do not enlist to become body servants, or convenient fall guys, for rich and powerful Democrat politicians.
Insanely expensive government: Bloated government fueled by economy-killing taxes produces nothing, except economy-killing regulations. Socialism is not a clever idea Barack Obama just came up with. It has been tried, and failed, around the globe, over and over again. Every socialist program in the history of the United States, from the “war on poverty” to public education, is a miserable failure with a staggering price tag. The most urgent imperative for the next Congress is to stop the runaway pork spending, dismantle government programs, and return money and freedom to the people, who will use it freely and productively. Republicans should strive to make the architects of the financial meltdown – people like Barney Frank and Chris Dodd – household names, with their corruption a matter of water-cooler conversation around the country. They should stress that Big Government is inherently corrosive – no party can swim in trillions of dollars and remain clean, as the Republicans of 2004 to 2008 demonstrated. Their campaign should not be to take over the wheel of the nanny state, but to dissolve it with massive tax cuts, and privatization of failed government programs. Remind the voters that everyone knows where Barack Obama’s tired, bankrupt socialism leads. He isn’t taking us on a bold new path. He’s just repackaging the same old swindles and reselling them to us with slick new advertising… and huge new price tags.
Americans can’t afford to be fools for the Democrats any more. They’ve enriched themselves with a very lucrative forty-year run, but if there’s one service we can thank Barack Obama for – before we set about the urgent business of making him the lamest duck ever to float across the bottom two years of the presidential pond – it’s the way he’s made the absurdity of socialism too obvious for any thinking person to ignore any more. In a shower of soaring unemployment, crashing market values, mind-blowing deficit spending, embarrassing foreign policy, and breathtaking corruption, Obama has given Republicans a flowchart for demonstrating how unethical and unsustainable socialism inevitably becomes. I can only hope they have the courage to walk past a media that will be begging, then demanding, and finally screaming at them to put that flowchart down…
… because we can’t afford an ineffective, timid Republican Party, either.