Meghan McCain, Sex and the GOP

posted at 4:13 pm on May 7, 2009 by Laura Curtis
[ Politics ]   

Young people always think they’re the first generation to discover sex and that their elders are uptight prudes who couldn’t possibly enjoy it. This phenomenon was illustrated in Meghan McCain’s latest Beastly love letter to her precious GOP.  (I see a lot of this sort of love at the battered women’s shelter where I volunteer.)

But for whatever reasons, the American public and media remain overly engrossed in our politicians’ sex lives and, as in this case, those of their families. There’s an especially unhealthy attitude among conservatives. Daughters of Republican politicians aren’t expected to have sex, let alone enjoy it—as if there were some strange chastity belt automatically attached to us female offspring. God forbid anyone talk realistically about life experiences and natural, sexual instincts. Nope, the answer is always abstinence.

The worst sexual double standard in politics right now is that too many subconsciously believe Republican women are void of sexual desire altogether.

This is something I know about firsthand. During my father’s 2000 presidential campaign, a reporter asked how he would feel if I became pregnant and wanted an abortion. He answered that it would be my choice, sending shockwaves throughout the party (because for the GOP there is only one answer, and obviously Senator McCain’s daughter shouldn’t be engaging in sex ever).

Wow.  Is there an anti-GOP stereotype she won’t promote?

I know you think it’s all about you, Meghan, but it’s really not.  You see, we tend to promote abstinence for all teenagers, not just daughters of politicians.  It’s not personal at all.  In fact, millions and millions of conservatives (and Republicans, too!) have never once considered your sex life.

There is no unhealthy attitude among conservatives toward sex.  It is not unhealthy to promote teen abstinence. Abstinence is the one sure way to prevent teen pregnancy and STDs.  And when we talk to our kids about sex, most of us do discuss birth control methods – if nothing else, to make sure they understand condoms have a 14% failure rate.  I do object to the sexual propaganda the schools put out these days, but that is not the same as being unwilling to have teenagers know about birth control methods.

The fact is that the answer is not always abstinence.  But when you are a teenager, generally lacking the resources to deal with the potential consequences of your actions, abstinence IS the best choice.  Otherwise your parents will have to pay (with their money, time, and emotional exhaustion) for your sexual escapades.  Hardly seems fair, does it?  But hey, if you’ve got the money, are living independently, and are emotionally mature enough to parent a child, then knock yourselves out, kids.  Hump away.  (Because if you were emotionally mature enough to parent a child, and living independently, then you’d be an adult and you wouldn’t need to be reminded of the consequences of your sexual activity. There are other reasons to promote abstinence, but that’s a post for another day.  Just this one is more than sufficient.)

Speaking of natural instincts, I often feel the urge to throttle the necks of people who annoy me by cutting me off in traffic or expressing really lame-brained opinions.  Not all natural instincts should be indulged.

The idea that teenagers are mindless bags of hormones who must and will have sex – while at the same time they are mature people, easily able to make an informed decision to have an abortion – while at the same time eighteen year olds are entirely too young, just babies, really, to decide to enlist in the military – is tiresome.  But the commonality of all the ways that the left views teenagers is this – in all cases, they think someone else is better suited to aid them than their parents.

Another concept that has escaped Ms. McCain (as a “liberal Republican”) is that quite a lot of conservatives object to the government paying for sex ed at all, outside the basics in biology class.  We feel that it is the parent’s job, not the school district’s, and we’re quite tired of their encroachment under the guise of “some parents don’t talk to their kids.”  There are more ways to accomplish a goal than to have a government program for it.  Alternatives like privately-funded organizations printing and distributing educational material apparently never occur to these people.  Given the limited number of hours in a school day and the deplorable academic ratings our country currently holds, we’d prefer that teachers focus on math, science and English, not global warming consensus and fisting.  (Yes, I know what that is, even though I’m like, way old.)

As for the dreaded sexual double standard… it isn’t unconscious.  It’s an extremely common stereotype described by this article and quite easy to spot.  Just like the “rich, stingy Republican” stereotype that is likely the topic for young Meghan’s next missive.  It’s what liberals have thought for years, in spite of the facts.  The truth is we like sex just fine.  In fact, conservatives enjoy it more than liberals.  According to The authoritative 1995 University of Chicago survey Sex in America

conservative Protestant married women were the group most likely to report that they “nearly always” orgasmed during sex. Married women of all religions were almost twice as likely as unmarried women to describe their sex lives as “extremely satisfying.”

The rest of the article is a diatribe that more or less advises irresponsible, prudish, dishonest Republican parents to – finally! – step up and take parenting advice from Meghan McCain.

We live in a big world, one where you can contract a life-long STD, have an unplanned pregnancy, or get date-raped, just to name a few of the dangerous results of having sex. We should prepare our kids for it, realistically. Then they might be more apt to make the right choices when they live in it themselves.

Good Lord.  Do you really think we’ve never heard of those things and done our best to protect our children from them?  Or are you just engaging in more President Teleprompter straw man battles?  At least you omitted the tell-tale “there are those” line this time.  You’re beclowning yourself, Meghan.  Stop it.

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Added: you know who else is carrying on about sex?  That Other McCain guy.  Seriously, he’s a wild man, making some pretty suggestive comments about Perez Hilton.  I don’t know what to make of that; with six kids I was sure he was batting for our team.  But I do agree, Allah hates him.  Besides, anybody whining about conjunctivitis should just suck it up already.  Complain to me when you get ebola.  Wimp.

Even MORE sex – Pundette is Looking For Love In All The Wrong Places but I can’t read it.  I can’t get past the title.  I keep hearing Buckwheat/Eddie Murphy singing Wookin Pa Nub.

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