Video: London law student threatens suit over waferless candy bar

posted at 9:21 pm on February 3, 2016 by Ed Morrissey

Just consider the utter, complete, and traumatic heartbreak of snapping a KitKat bar in two and finding … nothing but chocolate. Yes, my friends, the Evil Corporate Chocolate Cabal has robbed one young woman of the emotional lift one expects when spending a fortune on the rare delicacy of a mass-produced American candy bar. Well, one young woman, or better described, one young lawyer-to-be with a penchant for both histrionics and publicity:

NBC reports that Saima Ahmad has demanded a lifetime supply of KitKats in order to act as “quality control” for other consumers:

Saima Ahmad, 20, a law student in London, is so upset about the missing wafers that she is demanding a lifetime of supply of Kit Kats from candymaker Nestle. She is threatening to sue the company if she doesn’t get it, according to British news outlets.

“The failure to take due care in the manufacturing process resulted in a product being defective. As a result I feel as though I have been misled to part with my money and purchase a product that is clearly different from what has been marketed by Nestle,” Ahmad wrote in a letter, according to British newspaper Metro.

The second-year law student at King’s College London went on to demand a “full refund of the defective pack” and a lifetime supply of Kit Kats so she could “act as a means of quality control.”

“It appears you need me more than I need you,” she wrote.

NBC News gets in the spirit of the matter. No, really:

NBC News was not able to independently verify the travesty of the alleged missing wafer.

It’s not just a travesty — it’s a candatrocity, man. How can consumers trust corporations when they occasionally cheat them out of their wafer and put nothing but chocolate in candy bars?

Nestlé will probably send a few bars her way with an apology, but I’d love to see them use the Michael Corleone counteroffer instead:

If Ahmad takes this to court, let’s hope that the judge in the case not only throws it out, but sanctions the law school where this future ambulance chaser now studies.

 


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Comment pages: 1 2

Kit Kats are quite good but they don’t hold a candle to Coffee Crisps, eh Canopfor?

Pain Train on February 4, 2016 at 7:15 AM

Coffee Crisp linky.

Damn, now I might have to order a box!

Pain Train on February 4, 2016 at 7:21 AM

These people thrive on trying to make a mockery of Countries, Culture and Legal Systems. They take our freedoms and use them as weapons against us. This is their way of conquering us in a slow methodical way. While most will not pay attention to the facts this is exactly what Obama has done to bring our country to the brink. This is why this next election cycle is so important – to get people who LOVE this country and are MAD about what Washington has done to it. The finger is pointed at incumbents in both parties.

Nat George on February 4, 2016 at 7:37 AM

Just give her the [email protected] candy!! She’ll be to busy eating to go out and slaughter innocent people and blow a bunch of shiat up. GWB= ” i may have misunderestimated that Islam is a religion of peace”……

Indiana Jim on February 4, 2016 at 8:06 AM

Give it to her.

malclave on February 3, 2016 at 9:40 PM

All at once.

All in one crate.

From altitude.

GrumpyOldFart on February 4, 2016 at 8:11 AM

She needs more lamb and less sugar and STFU.

gbear on February 4, 2016 at 8:28 AM

KitKats are halal. I didn’t know that.

vityas on February 4, 2016 at 8:30 AM

Saima Ahmad, 20, a law student in London, is so upset about the missing wafers that she is demanding a lifetime of supply of Kit Kats from candymaker Nestle. She is threatening to sue the company if she doesn’t get it, according to British news outlets.

I was in a McD’s a couple of weeks ago and my McRib was missing the bottom of the bun.

All I got was a new sandwich….lost opportunities.

Rogue on February 4, 2016 at 8:31 AM

So her shtick is to annoy people until they give in? And a few less candy bars might be good for her fat moon blank-eyed face.

Mormaer on February 4, 2016 at 8:45 AM

Does she have actual preserved evidence? And a proper chain of custody for said evidence?

GWB on February 4, 2016 at 9:41 AM

Does she have actual preserved evidence? And a proper chain of custody for said evidence?

GWB on February 4, 2016 at 9:41 AM

Little miss Chunky? Nope, she ate the evidence.

oldernwiser on February 4, 2016 at 9:47 AM

One time in Crystal City I came home from the Harris Teeter with a bag of UTZ Sour Cream and Onion Chips. I opened the bag. The Chips were actually plain ridged instead. Dammit! I missed my chance for free chips for life!

timoric on February 4, 2016 at 9:56 AM

Well, she certainly got her 15 minutes – and not in a particularly flattering way.

And people wonder why lawyers (and wannabe lawyers) have such bad reputations.

Hill60 on February 4, 2016 at 9:58 AM

It looks like she’s already had a lifetime supply of Kit Kats.

Immolate on February 4, 2016 at 10:00 AM

The Brits have ‘Loser Pays’ – Right?

If so, then let her sue.

TimBuk3 on February 4, 2016 at 10:00 AM

All at once.

All in one crate.

From altitude.

GrumpyOldFart on February 4, 2016 at 8:11 AM

hahahahahaha

THIS.

g2825m on February 4, 2016 at 10:20 AM

Rogue on February 4, 2016 at 8:31 AM

Exactly. A month ago I bought a twinkie and it had no filling. Stupid me, I contacted them and they sent me coupons for some free ones – I could have sued!!

Free Indeed on February 4, 2016 at 10:27 AM

I come here for trenchant conservative commentary to give me emotional release from the liberal wasteland in which we live. But ever since Michelle Malkin left, that sweet sweet crispiness of true conservative wit has been replaced with the cloying sweetness of RINO chocolate.

I think I need to sue Salem.

JoseQuinones on February 4, 2016 at 10:32 AM

Mucking Fuslim.

Nutstuyu on February 4, 2016 at 11:25 AM

I’m certain the UN will soon seek a wafer-less person’s tax on all manufacturers (except China’s) for their undiscovered crimes.

Don L on February 4, 2016 at 11:32 AM

Snowflake ought to be grateful she’s not back in some ME hellhole picking goat pellets out of the sand for the rock garden.

antipc on February 4, 2016 at 11:57 AM

They should send her the missing wafers.
Some assembly required.

Dexter_Alarius on February 4, 2016 at 12:00 PM

The funny part is, as most any idiot knows, if you actually have a mis-manufactured candy bar and then, do as the wrapper says and send it back, they shower you with replacement candy.

mikethemoose on February 4, 2016 at 12:20 PM

I come to this site to enjoy the crisp wit of commentators, I’ve never just gotten milk chocolate.

aceinstall on February 5, 2016 at 8:00 AM

Comment pages: 1 2