Great news: Thor’s getting a sex change

posted at 6:01 pm on July 15, 2014 by Allahpundit

To cleanse the palate. He’s got long blonde hair, wears an elaborate costume, and is forever swinging around a large phallic totem. If it was a guitar, I’d have assumed he’s in a hair-metal band and left it at that. But a hammer? The man’s overcompensating. He’s got a secret.

A big one, as it turns out.

Who’s up for a 37-issue series in which Thor quietly contemplates how much harder life is as a woman?

This October, Marvel Comics evolves once again in one of the most shocking and exciting changes ever to shake one of the “big three” of Captain American, Iron Man and Thor. No longer is the classic Thunder God able to hold the mighty hammer, Mjölnir, and a brand new female hero will emerge worthy of the name THOR…

“The inscription on Thor’s hammer reads ‘Whosoever holds this hammer, if HE be worthy, shall possess the power of Thor.’ Well it’s time to update that inscription,” says Marvel editor Wil Moss. “The new Thor continues Marvel’s proud tradition of strong female characters like Captain Marvel, Storm, Black Widow and more. And this new Thor isn’t a temporary female substitute – she’s now the one and only Thor, and she is worthy!”

Series writer Jason Aaron emphasizes, “This is not She-Thor. This is not Lady Thor. This is not Thorita. This is THOR. This is the THOR of the Marvel Universe. But it’s unlike any Thor we’ve ever seen before.”

I wish Marvel would leave the social commentary to more sophisticated comics, like Archie. Follow the link above for confirmation that, yes, of course Trans-Thor is buxom, which goes to show you that certain core comics conventions must be observed even while in the process of shattering others. In fact, a Twitter pal makes a good point: If you look closely, you’ll see that Thor’s iron breastplate inexplicably yet conveniently ends right below the bra-line, leaving some skin exposed squarely in the center of her midsection. Looks like Trans-Thor is less concerned with protecting her sternum than with giving her male opponents a peek. So much for female empowerment. It’s going to hurt when Loki calls her “Whor.”

Exit question: This is nothing but a pretext to phase Chris Hemsworth out and phase Jennifer Lawrence in, isn’t it?


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Snorri Sturluson is rolling in his grave.

Sven on July 16, 2014 at 12:45 PM

It should be Brynhild!

Sven on July 16, 2014 at 12:49 PM

Actually, the real tragedy here is the tacit admission from the folks at Marvel Comics that the needle on the creativity tank gauge is on E. Just like Hollywood with its predilection of remaking movies that don’t need remaking (I’m talking about you Red Dawn). Our liberal orthodoxy is stifling the artistic and creative spirit of Western Civilization. The irony, of course, is that the very artists being strangled are the most ardent worshippers at the altar of Political Correctness.

dreadnought62 on July 16, 2014 at 12:50 PM

Think they can get Thora Birch to play the part?

PJ Emeritus on July 16, 2014 at 12:52 PM

OP no, not Thora, Thorina?

jake49 on July 16, 2014 at 12:59 PM

Wait, wait, Thorilla?

jake49 on July 16, 2014 at 1:00 PM

To the Vikings (my ancestors) Thor was a religion not a mythology!
The funny thing is in the stories of Thor his hammer “Mjolnir” was stolen by giants who wanted Freya for their King. Thor dressed as a woman to fool them and get his hammer back.

Sven on July 16, 2014 at 1:03 PM

Thora.

It’s obvious. Now, what will Stark do?

Mazz on July 16, 2014 at 1:06 PM

Why don’t you Commie douchebags leave our comics alone and go write a graphic novel of Das Kapital…. Or better yet, shoot yourselves instead of Archie.

tkmcp on July 16, 2014 at 1:08 PM

dreadnought62 on July 16, 2014 at 12:50 PM

What is really mindblowing is that they are not using the technology of their web app to help them. I subbed three books of the avengers group, but when Black Widow’s book came out, I got no email from Marvel and just found the book an hour ago, but they spam me with email about other titles I’m not the least bit interested in.

Speaking of BW, if they have strong female characters that are well written and interesting they would sell. (Assuming they MARKET them)

Now, all my subs are canceled.

dogsoldier on July 16, 2014 at 1:20 PM

tkmcp on July 16, 2014 at 1:08 PM

If they aren’t screwing things up they are not happy. They have to warp the world into their perverse vision of what it should be. Note: The world will never be warped enough to match and it will resist their best efforts to change it. This is why every experiment at socialism fails.

dogsoldier on July 16, 2014 at 1:23 PM

Actually, the real tragedy here is the tacit admission from the folks at Marvel Comics that the needle on the creativity tank gauge is on E. Just like Hollywood with its predilection of remaking movies that don’t need remaking (I’m talking about you Red Dawn). Our liberal orthodoxy is stifling the artistic and creative spirit of Western Civilization. The irony, of course, is that the very artists being strangled are the most ardent worshippers at the altar of Political Correctness.

dreadnought62 on July 16, 2014 at 12:50 PM

Well said. Thor was my favorite super hero back in the 60s. I was member number 31 of the MMMS (Merry Marvel Marching Society) and have handwritten signed letter from Stan Lee and Jack Kirby. I also have a one-off pencil drawing of Galactus by Jack Kirby… In short I am, or was, a fan of Marvel comics.

While I have no issue with trans-people (sorry if that is not PC-compliant, it’s getting hard to keep up and there does not seem to be a canonical tome of currently acceptable PC-terms to reference), but this is too much, too far afield of what and who Thor is.

The comic may be entitled “Thor”, but it is most assuredly not Thor.

DrDeano on July 16, 2014 at 2:20 PM

“Thorazine” would be more appropriate. Marvel Comics is about to tank because video games are all the rage today.

Cherokee on July 16, 2014 at 3:00 PM

It’s a good thing we still have Captain America.
Otherwise there would be no blonde-haired blue-eyed male superheroes left in the Marvel universe.

papertiger on July 16, 2014 at 3:33 PM

I think Odin needs to make an appearance at Marvel and do a little house cleaning.

Sven on July 16, 2014 at 3:43 PM

Professor Xavier – killed off in the movie.

Scott Summers – killed in the movie.

Steve Rogers – killed in in Captain America vol. 5, #25

Thor – transformed into a girl.

Marvel is committing genocide.

papertiger on July 16, 2014 at 3:45 PM

papertiger on July 16, 2014 at 3:45 PM

I don’t know if you saw Days of Future Past but your post might require some amending.

Also, Steve Rogers isn’t dead.

In fact, no one in comics is dead: the old adage used to be that no one stays dead except Uncle Ben, Jason Todd and Bucky, but even the exceptions have effectively been wiped off the map.

For a take on how this came about, take in the observations of one Max Landis as he gives a treatise on the subject, in the style of Drunk History (language warning).

The Schaef on July 16, 2014 at 4:52 PM

How very…I dunno…passe. There was a time when this might have been daring and bleeding edge, not that I would have approved mind you. Now it just seems like a desperate attempt to prove that they are somehow relevant. News flash for Marvel: If you have to tell others how relevant you are, it’s ’cause you’re not.

Actually, now that I think of it, this isn’t the first time they pulled this stunt. Vol 2, #66 of What If featured Rogue as a female Thor. That was about the same time I gave up comic books.

Mr. Bultitude on July 16, 2014 at 5:03 PM

As someone mentioned upthread, we’ve seen others wield the power of Thor before (Heck, Steve Rogers was/is Worthy, Superman isn’t)

I think the big issue is, with the exception of Eric Masterson posing as Thor for a while, none of them claimed to be the actual Thor, like this one is said to be doing. When Beta Ray Bill picked up the hammer he wasn’t Beta Ray Thor, Steve tossing the hammer to Thor didn’t make him Captain AmeriThor, And Diana picking up the hammer didn’t make her WonThor Woman. (Sigh, I miss Eric)

Even when Odin let Superman use the hammer, he didn’t become SuperThor. The annoying thing is that Thor Odinson is still, well, Thor. When Dick became Batman, or Bucky became Cap, they didn’t change their names to Bruce Wayne or Steve Rogers.

I’m more irritated that it is not Sif, or Brunhilde (Valkyrie) or even Dani Moonstar, it’s some brand new character designed for titilation. *sigh*

In Any event, a month or two before Avengers 2, we’ll see Thor pick up the Hammer again

The_Livewire on July 16, 2014 at 5:37 PM

I quit reading Marvel comics when the regular monthly subscriptions quit. Like the old days.
Or perhaps they didn’t and only the titles I read did, like Spiderman 2099, X-men, Wolverine, Excalibur etc.
Plus in the 90s they started injecting more obvious political tripe into them & I got tired of being preached to.
The original comics were great. Now they suck.
And these graphic novels are boring to me.
Quite honestly I got bored.
But maybe I just grew up bcs I also quit playing D&D.
I now do other more interesting things with my time.
Amazing how one changes.

Badger40 on July 16, 2014 at 5:45 PM

I’m more irritated that it is not Sif, or Brunhilde (Valkyrie) or even Dani Moonstar, it’s some brand new character designed for titilation. *sigh*

The_Livewire on July 16, 2014 at 5:37 PM

Tits sell.

BobMbx on July 16, 2014 at 5:53 PM

I wish Marvel would leave the social commentary to more sophisticated comics, like Archie.

I read this and my head exploded.

hawkdriver on July 16, 2014 at 7:50 PM

I find this highly offensive to Norse culture and their traditional tribal beliefs.

It must be stopped immediately.

crosspatch on July 16, 2014 at 8:54 PM

n fact, no one in comics is dead: the old adage used to be that no one stays dead except Uncle Ben, Jason Todd and Bucky, but even the exceptions have effectively been wiped off the map.

A better metric would be who has never been dead in the Marvel universe.

Here’s some of the characters that for some reason have never been killed off.

Black Panther – never been dead, even despite being a big nothing burger of a character. They even killed off Matt Murdock so that Black Panther could steal the Daredevil personna.

The Falcon – who is just a knock off of the high flying Angel (another blonde killed off) has never been killed. I read that it was a follower of the Falcon who assassinated Captain America. And Marvel had the balls to make Falcon a pall bearer at Cap’s funeral.

Blade – isn’t he supposed to be undead anyway? Nope never died in the comic.

Storm – Never dead.

Power Man – Luke Cage Hero for Hire never died in a comic. Everyone of his sidekicks croaked at one time or another.

Black Panther, the Falcon, Blade, Storm, Power Man — what else does this group of marvel superheros have in common besides never having shuffled off the mortal coil, even temporarily?

papertiger on July 16, 2014 at 9:12 PM

Marvel Comics announces black character as the new Captain America

Marvel Comics is rolling out its latest revamp of one of its main superheroes — following up on the announcement that a woman will pick up the hammer of Thor — with an African-American character becoming the new Captain America.

In the comic’s storyline an incapacitated Steve Rogers, the original Captain America, will hand off the role to his longtime friend and superhero partner the Falcon, real name Sam Wilson, to take over in the patriotic costume and iconic circular shield.

TigerPaw on July 17, 2014 at 2:04 AM

This is reminiscent of when DC Entertainment made Superman renounce his American citizenship (even though, way back in the “Silver Age” when Superman was drawn by Curt Swan he was granted “world citizenship” by the UN.

The left can’t resist monkeying with the concept of the exceptional, the “super,” if you will. They’re the real comic book villains, itching to take the heroes down a notch (or destroy them completely). That’s why they want to “fundamentally transform” the USA into a third world banana republic.

Like Jim Croce sang, “You don’t tug on Superman’s cape … you don’t pull the mask off the ol’ Lone Ranger”.

Or, like Syndrome said in “The Incredibles,” “…when everyone’s super, no one is.” Leftists want everyone to be homogenous, “equal”, and as miserable as they are, while the true villains use deceit and deception to put the frogs in the pot.

Truth, justice, and the American way is anathema to them.

falcon on July 17, 2014 at 10:06 AM

TigerPaw on July 17, 2014 at 2:04 AM

Saw that.

Based on the reactions I read on their forums, Marvel will go the same route as newsweek.

Cannot wait.

dogsoldier on July 17, 2014 at 10:53 AM

This is getting ridiculous.

Sue on July 17, 2014 at 11:28 AM

Hancock – [when Embrey shows him a third comic with a blonde-haired hero] Norwegian …

TerryW on July 17, 2014 at 12:30 PM

Marvel Comics announces black character as the new Captain America

Captain Affirmative Action Hire?

papertiger on July 17, 2014 at 3:49 PM

Grovel Comics indeed.

papertiger on July 17, 2014 at 3:51 PM

Why does Captain America need replacing?

Why doesn’t The Falcon need someone to step in and cover for him while he’s busy, injured, crippled, dead (temporarily – although there is no precedent of a black superhero dying at Marvel. Closest thing to immortality you can get. Even thunder gods don’t get that sort of fawning trapped in amber consideration.)?

SO it is racist.

But on the other hand – who gives a Phuque if there’s a Falcon.

papertiger on July 17, 2014 at 5:35 PM

During the Walt Simonson issues(the best), Lokie turned him into a frog. While he was a frog he was able to lift his hammer and become Thor frog. Him becoming a woman would be just another sad marketing gimmick that will be looked upon shamefully decades from now. The era of disco produced many such moments in comicbook history.

DFCtomm on July 17, 2014 at 6:21 PM

I guess I have to stop talking about my Thor boobs now.

Axe on July 15, 2014 at 6:08 PM

Poor, poor Axe. She will have boobs, right?

Bmore on July 17, 2014 at 10:24 PM

Here is Marvel’s rational for genocide of the white superheroes.

Robbed of his superior strength and vitality, Steve Rogers must surrender his blues for a sturdy cane. He’s not about to fade away just yet though. The old maxims hold true: If dead men declared the war and old men talk about it, a young man must rise and continue the fight.

http://marvel.com/news/comics/2014/7/16/22895/its_time_for_an_all-new_captain_america#ixzz37nK53SOQ

Only one problem with that noise. Sam Wilson the character is about 106 years old (real time chronology) with no super powers to speak of as a cheat to claim he ages more slowly than normal.

Nope. Racist genocide pandering to the statists.

papertiger on July 18, 2014 at 1:26 AM

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