The Ronan Farrow Comedy Hour’s pitch-perfect parody of liberal elitism

posted at 6:01 pm on July 1, 2014 by Noah Rothman

Progressives hate the fact that Americans have never taken a strong liking to soccer. Why? Who knows.

Maybe it is a symptom of liberalism’s widely shared Europhilia. Maybe it is just another monolithic and yet somehow contrarian viewpoint progressives adopt in order to highlight their status as enlightened thinkers. Regardless, America’s general apathy toward the Beautiful Game has been a source of consternation for generations of liberals.

The crack writing staff over at MSNBC’s Ronan Farrow Daily picked up on this theme on the left and, on Tuesday, broadcast among the more hilarious sketches parodying this phenomenon.

In one of two segments on Tuesday surrounding World Cup mania, Ronan and company tackled the issue of why Americans never jumped on the soccer bandwagon. They stipulated that it was because the rules of the game simply too far outside the American experience for us provincials to fully comprehend.

“Do you think it actually needs to have some more changes in its rules to appeal to Americans?” the host asked his guest. “One of the complaints you hear over and over again is, Americans are confused by the fact that there are so many games that end in ties and the scoring doesn’t happen as quickly.”

“Do you need something with more scoring in the mix?” he asked.

“I just think you need to educate the public a little bit,” his soccer expert guest replied. “A goal is like a touchdown.”

“So, people just need to be educated a little bit more,” Farrow summarized.

What a knee-slapper, right? There isn’t a progressive alive so elitist that they really believe Americans are so dense that they need soccer explained to them in football’s terms, but that’s what makes this parody so spot-on — a grain of truth about the left exaggerated to preposterous proportions.

But the yucks don’t end there, folks. After the break, Farrow & Co. returned for yet another break on soccer. This time, however, they really shot for the rafters (whatever that reference refers to) by taking the liberal elitism theme to its most absurd conclusion.

In this segment, our players mock liberalism’s obsession with regulating other people’s behaviors by questioning the ability of parents to make informed decisions about whether their children should play the dangerous sport of soccer. The guests advocated for wearing head gear in order to limit the number of concussions athletes receive while playing the game.

Farrow did not rule out “legislative solutions” to the problem of soccer players getting concussed on the field.

Lest you think this is all about protecting the kids, as these comic geniuses insisted, MSNBC’s hosts and guests have advocated similar legislative remedies for the issue of concussions suffered by professional football players as well.

So good. I hope Team Farrow’s Emmy submissions make it all the way this year. The entertainment industry needs more of this kind of superb satire.

Keep up the good work, guys. We’ll be watching.

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I’m thinking, make the ball smaller and the goal bigger. Or outlaw goalies. That should increase scoring. What fun!!

Yeah, the world really needs the USA to “fix” soccer.

The fact is, the rest of the world could care less whether we “hate” the sport or not. So, I suppose we can please ourselves by pronouncing our judgment on the game, even with a Texas twang, but… nobody’s listening.

IndieDogg on July 2, 2014 at 3:09 AM

Replace soccer with the Aztec sport of Ōllamaliztli.

It was played in a walled field with two stone hoops way up on the sides. The ball was made of solid latex and weighed nine pounds. You could hit it only with your hips.

One goal of ball through hoop immediately ended the game, and the losing team became human sacrifices.

I think Americans would like it better than soccer.

A Chair of Some Kind on July 2, 2014 at 4:16 AM

It is good to see Ronan joining with Rush Limbaugh’s Keep Our Own Kids Safe .. KOOKS campaign.

coondawg on July 2, 2014 at 5:48 AM

Keep up the good work, guys. We’ll be watching.

Um, no we won’t be watching. And if it wasn’t for you tools at HA MSNBC would have no audience at all.

earlgrey on July 2, 2014 at 9:43 AM

I thought they fired Little Blue Eyes. Huh.

Fallon on July 1, 2014 at 7:17 PM

They did, but he just took his contacts out and now he is Little Brown Eyes. And when he comes out he will just be Little Brown Eye.

earlgrey on July 2, 2014 at 9:54 AM

A Chair of Some Kind on July 2, 2014 at 4:16 AM


Mind you, I actually like soccer. I enjoyed playing as a kid, and I sometimes enjoy watching as an adult. (“Poetry in motion” would be an accurate description of Pele; egad I enjoyed watching his physical virtuosity back in the day.) If it were left on its own it would be moderately popular. (Much like it is already with kids.) It’s that progressive Europhilic nanny-bullying insistence that we must like it that’s the real buzz-kill, though. I eat salads sometimes, too, and I enjoy them at times – but if you’re going to insist that I eat one every day because it’s good for me, I will probably avoid them like e. coli. If you insist that I must eat my spinach, guess what will never end up in my grocery cart?

GWB on July 2, 2014 at 10:13 AM

What an incredible waste of time. This must have keep their three listeners just riveted to their TV sets.

regmgr on July 2, 2014 at 10:55 AM

Golf and bowling, followed closely by watching paint dry, are more exciting than soccer.

landlines on July 2, 2014 at 11:43 AM

If I had a kid in the chess club I would make him/her wear a helmet, pads and a hockey goalie’s mask. Not taking any chances!

stoutj734 on July 2, 2014 at 11:56 AM

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