Be of good cheer, subjects: An heir to the throne is due

posted at 6:41 pm on April 17, 2014 by Allahpundit

I’d like to tell you that this doesn’t qualify as news beyond the confines of the Clinton family but the recent Jeb boomlet reminds us that America is sliding further towards monarchy as a symptom of late-stage imperial decadence. Looks like we’re on track for eight more years of a Clinton or Bush, then possibly a reprise of Michelle Obama, followed perhaps by a term or two of Biden. Then we’ll be ready for Bush/Clinton III between George P. and Chelsea (who’s now open to running for office, don’tcha know), and after that the law of averages suggests that the Kennedys will have once again produced a political talent who isn’t a total embarrassment.

George P. Bush had his first son last year, by the way. I figure it’s destiny that his kid and Chelsea’s kid will end up married or running against each other in 2068. Or both.

“Mark and I are very excited that we have our first child arriving later this year, and I certainly feel all the better whether it’s a girl or a boy that she or he will grow up in a world full of so many strong young female leaders,” [Chelsea Clinton] said. “So thank you for inspiring me and inspiring future generations including the one that we’ll be lucky enough to welcome into our family later this year.”

Clinton insiders have said a Chelsea pregnancy is the “big wildcard” for whether Hillary Clinton will pull the trigger on a 2016 presidential campaign.

The daughter of former President Bill Clinton and former First Lady and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, who has been in public life for more than 30 years, nodded to her parents as role models for her own parenting. “I just hope that I will be as good a mom to my child and hopefully children as my mother was to me,” she said.

She told a magazine last year that she wanted to have a baby this year, and now here we are. Congrats to the mom-to-be and her family. Maybe having a little one around to dote on will convince Billary to take retirement earlier than expected? Or will this be more of a “we can turn Chelsea’s old room in the White House into a nursery!” sort of thing?

Incidentally, grandma’s favorable rating is currently lower than it’s been in six years. Via the IRJ, here’s HuffPo reporter Sam Stein trying and failing to find something impressive on her resume that would justify handing her the presidency.


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How, um, timely.

Congrats?

Fallon on April 17, 2014 at 6:43 PM

If it’s a girl, they will name her ‘Monica’….and a boy…’Ben’…

bimmcorp on April 17, 2014 at 6:45 PM

This has to be by artificial insemination. I just can’t imagine any “man” saddling up to THAT and not immediately becoming unable to “perform”. This is Hillary Junior we are talking about here! Frostbite man, frostbite!

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 6:46 PM

As I asked on Twitter, what kind of self-respecting feminist manages to get herself pregnant in 2014? So cis. And gross.

‘Today, Chelsea Clinton announces the she is with clump-o-cells.’

BKeyser on April 17, 2014 at 6:46 PM

Here, mate, wasn’t there a Nostradamus quatrain about this?

SailorMark on April 17, 2014 at 6:46 PM

If it’s a girl, they will name her ‘Monica’….and a boy…’Ben’…

bimmcorp on April 17, 2014 at 6:45 PM

How about Huma?

Or Vince?

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 6:47 PM

Here comes the prop….here comes the prop !!

burrata on April 17, 2014 at 6:47 PM

The daughter of former President Bill Clinton and former First Lady and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, who has been in public life for more than 30 years, nodded to her parents as role models for her own parenting. “I just hope that I will be as good a mom to my child and hopefully children as my mother was to me,” she said.

C,mon now HA people, who wouldn’t be lucky to have an ice cube soaked in vinegar as a mom?

arnold ziffel on April 17, 2014 at 6:48 PM

As I asked on Twitter, what kind of self-respecting feminist manages to get herself pregnant in 2014? So cis. And gross.

‘Today, Chelsea Clinton announces the she is with clump-o-cells.’

BKeyser on April 17, 2014 at 6:46 PM

This IS a Royal Pregnancy we are talking about here. As long as there is no identifiable father, and it was by artificial insemination so there was no “PIV” I’m sure they are cool with it.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 6:48 PM

Resume aside, who in their right mind would vote for post-menopausal female whose medical history is indicative of high risk of stroke?

Seriously? With all the problems our nation is facing?

lineholder on April 17, 2014 at 6:48 PM

C,mon now HA people, who wouldn’t be lucky to have an ice cube soaked in vinegar as a mom?

arnold ziffel on April 17, 2014 at 6:48 PM

All Hillary has to do to cool her whole house is stand in front of a fan.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 6:49 PM

Kennedys will have once again produced a political talent who isn’t a total embarrassment.

Just went off the rails.

WryTrvllr on April 17, 2014 at 6:49 PM

Congratulations and best wishes to Chelsea and her husband.

myiq2xu on April 17, 2014 at 6:49 PM

Resume aside, who in their right mind would vote for post-menopausal female whose medical history is indicative of high risk of stroke?

Seriously? With all the problems our nation is facing?

lineholder on April 17, 2014 at 6:48 PM

What difference does it make?

Barack Obama is proof a person with a nonfunctional brain can be President. Sort of.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 6:50 PM

that she or he will grow up in a world full of so many strong young female leaders,” [Chelsea Clinton] said.

like Killery, Fluck and Burfa Lewis ?

burrata on April 17, 2014 at 6:50 PM

Shouldn’t she be running off to Planned Parenthood like a good little Dem to make a choice on how to get this “problem” resolved?

dentarthurdent on April 17, 2014 at 6:50 PM

like Killery, Fluck and Burfa Lewis ?

burrata on April 17, 2014 at 6:50 PM

You forgot to mention the full-blooded, high cheekboned Indian Princess Lieawatha Warren!

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 6:51 PM

Shouldn’t she be running off to Planned Parenthood like a good little Dem to make a choice on how to get this “problem” resolved?

dentarthurdent on April 17, 2014 at 6:50 PM

She will be granted a waiver in the name of continuing the Royal Line.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 6:51 PM

The daughter of former President Bill Clinton and former First Lady and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, who has been in public life for more than 30 years, nodded to her parents as role models for her own parenting.

Just in case you started to think that Chelsea had somehow not inherited the lying gene….

I actually wish her well. As long as she isn’t running for election.

There Goes the Neighborhood on April 17, 2014 at 6:52 PM

Mark and I are very excited that we have our first child arriving later this year, and

No internet search- What is the last name of Mr. Chelsea Clinton and what does he do? A pajama boy prop for the Clinton Dynasty.

Happy Nomad on April 17, 2014 at 6:52 PM

Resume aside, who in their right mind would vote for post-menopausal female whose medical history is indicative of high risk of stroke?

Seriously? With all the problems our nation is facing?

lineholder on April 17, 2014 at 6:48 PM

How many Dem voters do you know of who are “in their right mind”?

dentarthurdent on April 17, 2014 at 6:52 PM

I just hope that I will be as good a mom to my child and hopefully children as my mother was to me,” she said.

Home-made chocolate chip cookies. Ever had one, Chels?

Here’s a blitz, ready? Chelsea, lets do a quick word association:

Ready? Okay……Betty Crocker?

BobMbx on April 17, 2014 at 6:53 PM

Congratulations and best wishes to Chelsea and her husband.

myiq2xu on April 17, 2014 at 6:49 PM

Seriously?? So what does the guy do, when after Thanksgiving dinner, the Father-in-law asks “Wanna go out on the porch and have a cigar?”

WryTrvllr on April 17, 2014 at 6:54 PM

I figure it’s destiny that his kid and Chelsea’s kid will end up married or running against each other in 2068. Or both.

By that point the Fascist-Democrats and Republicans will have officially merged and the IRS will suppress all other political parties. They’ll marry and rule us for 16 years. But it won’t matter because the environmentalists will force us to live in a feudal society.

rbj on April 17, 2014 at 6:55 PM

If it’s a girl, they will name her ‘Monica’….and a boy…’Ben’…

bimmcorp on April 17, 2014 at 6:45 PM

Trayvon?

dentarthurdent on April 17, 2014 at 6:56 PM

No internet search- What is the last name of Mr. Chelsea Clinton and what does he do? A pajama boy prop for the Clinton Dynasty.

Happy Nomad on April 17, 2014 at 6:52 PM

He donates sperm.

The most surprising thing about this is that apparently they were in the same room together and did “something”. Word about Chelsea’s marriage has been that it pretty much broke down not long after it happened.

The Dowager Queen Hilldebeast herself probably commanded them to produce a child. After all, the Royal Line Must Be Continued. And a granddaughter (with all that powerful XX going on here, you know the child will be female) for Hillary to use as a prop will somehow make her look “feminine” just when she needs it in 2016.

So, Chelsea has done her duty and will produce her single child. Like her mother, you can bet she’ll never submit to this indignity AGAIN…

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 6:56 PM

If it’s a girl, they will name her ‘Monica’….and a boy…’Ben’…

bimmcorp on April 17, 2014 at 6:45 PM

Trayvon?

dentarthurdent on April 17, 2014 at 6:56 PM

“Barry”

BobMbx on April 17, 2014 at 6:57 PM

How many Dem voters do you know of who are “in their right mind”?

dentarthurdent on April 17, 2014 at 6:52 PM

You are…absolutely right. What was I thinking to even suggest it?

lineholder on April 17, 2014 at 6:58 PM

“Barry”

BobMbx on April 17, 2014 at 6:57 PM

I rather doubt that. They will name the dog that fetches things “Barry”. They’ll train it to fetch coffee.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 6:58 PM

@Happy Nomad:

He’s a jewish guy who was a prop trader at Goldman and left to open up his own hedgefund. I forget the AUM – i believe its a macro strategy fund.

uatu1878 on April 17, 2014 at 6:58 PM

Hillary will decide not to run soon so she can enjoy time with her Family now. Bank on that.

Johnnyreb on April 17, 2014 at 6:59 PM

As much fun as this is, Chelsea really doesn’t deserve it. Its not her fault who her parents are. But, she did go on the campaign trail as an adult in support of Cankles, so……to be fair, lets give it a good 12 hour cycle and then let her go.

BobMbx on April 17, 2014 at 6:59 PM

It’s always a miracle when liberals allow a child to be born.

Congratulations to the Clintons. May the child be healthy, and happy!

portlandon on April 17, 2014 at 7:00 PM

TA DA DA DAHHHHHHHHHHHHB !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
.
BEHOLED!!!!! (<<<— intentional spelling, so shut up)

ExpressoBold on April 17, 2014 at 7:02 PM

No internet search- What is the last name of Mr. Chelsea Clinton and what does he do? A pajama boy prop for the Clinton Dynasty.

Happy Nomad on April 17, 2014 at 6:52 PM

Medvedev Molezinski. Margolin Mezvinski.
Something like that.

bettycooper on April 17, 2014 at 7:03 PM

Just think of how wonderful it would be if a member of the Clinton Royal Family married a member of the Bush Royal Family and they produced an offspring. He, or she, would probably look like Prince Charles of England. Of what a wonderful day it would be.

VorDaj on April 17, 2014 at 7:03 PM

Is it a boy or a girl zygote?

Mallard T. Drake on April 17, 2014 at 7:03 PM

He’s a jewish guy who was a prop trader at Goldman and left to open up his own hedgefund. I forget the AUM – i believe its a macro strategy fund.

uatu1878 on April 17, 2014 at 6:58 PM

Is he registered?

BobMbx on April 17, 2014 at 7:04 PM

Congratulations and best wishes to Chelsea and her husband.

myiq2xu on April 17, 2014 at 6:49 PM

Do they know who the baby daddy is yet??

bimmcorp on April 17, 2014 at 7:06 PM

Just think of how wonderful it would be if a member of the Clinton Royal Family married a member of the Bush Royal Family and they produced an offspring. He, or she, would probably look like Prince Charles of England. Of what a wonderful day it would be.

VorDaj on April 17, 2014 at 7:03 PM

I doubt that.

It took 1,000 years of inbreeding to produce a face like Charles.

The Clintons, Bushes, Obamas and Kennedys will have to inbreed amongst themselves a long time to get there.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:06 PM

If it’s a girl, they will name her ‘Monica’….and a boy…’Ben’…

bimmcorp on April 17, 2014 at 6:45 PM

Vince ?
or maybe Paula ?

burrata on April 17, 2014 at 7:06 PM

the recent Jeb boomlet reminds us that America is sliding further towards monarchy as a symptom of late-stage imperial decadence. Looks like we’re on track for eight more years of a Clinton or Bush, then possibly a reprise of Michelle Obama, followed perhaps by a term or two of Biden. Then we’ll be ready for Bush/Clinton III between George P. and Chelsea

.
You are a sick, very ill, even sadistic individual… I nearly puked! Well done!

ExpressoBold on April 17, 2014 at 7:06 PM

Do they know who the baby daddy is yet??

bimmcorp on April 17, 2014 at 7:06 PM

And better yet, will he admit it?

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:06 PM

Medvedev Molezinski. Margolin Mezvinski.
Something like that.

bettycooper on April 17, 2014 at 7:03 PM

Marc Mezvinsky

rbj on April 17, 2014 at 7:07 PM

I find it amazing that Chelsea is actually pregnant. I mean..there just is not enough beer in Milwaukee…

bimmcorp on April 17, 2014 at 7:08 PM

Just think of how wonderful it would be if a member of the Clinton Royal Family married a member of the Bush Royal Family and they produced an offspring. He, or she, would probably look like Prince Charles of England. Of what a wonderful day it would be.

VorDaj on April 17, 2014 at 7:03 PM

Wouldn’t that be like the anti-Kwisatz Haderach?

BobMbx on April 17, 2014 at 7:08 PM

Incidentally, grandma’s favorable rating is currently lower than it’s been in six years.

To the WaPo comments we go!

From FOX News would you expect any thing else……….

(Of course, Faux News routinely gave Bill Clinton slightly higher job approval ratings than other pollsters during his pResidency.)

I hope this poll is just Fox/Republican propaganda. Bush started the downfall of this country.

(Of course, Faux News routinely gave Bill Clinton slightly higher job approval ratings than other pollsters during his pResidency.)

Polls are often created to get the answers the person paying for it is looking for.

(John Zogby admitted that he polled only on weekends to give the Democrats the edge, so you’re right, Beavis!)

faux News poll………….hahahahahhahaahahahahehahahahaha …cut it out…you’re killllling me….from laughter

(Of course, Faux News routinely gave Bill Clinton slightly higher job approval ratings than other pollsters during his pResidency.)

Fox News poll is about as reliable as Sara Palin’s opinions.

(Of course, Faux News routinely gave Bill Clinton slightly higher job approval ratings than other pollsters during his pResidency.)

A fox news poll! Give me a break!

And finally, from here on Planet Earth…

I’ve been trying to get liberals and ANYONE who likes or supports Hillary to give me ONE REASON WHY….without success. The best I get is “she’s for women”, but when challenged they can’t tell me anything she’s done FOR them, esp. when I tick off all the horrible things she’s done TO them. The other thing I ask anyone who “admires” her is to tell me why — I implore them to tell me ONE THING SHE’S DONE — ONE THING SHE’S ACCOMPLISHED as First Lady (when her most memorable actions were blaming “the vast right-wing conspiracy” for her husband’s inability to keep his pants zipped, firing the entire Travel Office to put her cronies in there, “finding” the files that were mysteriously missing in the Whitewater investigation — in the White House!), as Senator (mostly named post offices and federal buildings) or Sec’y. of State, where the best Cokie Roberts could do was burble about how she was the “hardest working SoS, racking up a million miles…” — all I keep thinking was the tens or hundreds of millions of dollars it cost the taxpayers for her and her entourage to fly everywhere first class all around the world to throw gasoline on every hot spot on the planet, forget talking about how impressed with was with Assad and calling him “a reformer”, ignoring the pleas of those in Benghazi for more security before avoiding the Senate investigation for months, then famously blurting, “What different, at this point, does it make?!”) What on earth does ANYBODY admire about this woman???

Two non-answers follow:

What has any Republican chasing his or her party’s nomination done for anybody other than their rich friends?

“One reason?” She isn’t a right wing crazy like the majority of her proposed right wing opponents.

“MY BRAIN HURTS!”

Del Dolemonte on April 17, 2014 at 7:08 PM

Chelsea doesn’t look bad considering that bullet she took to the face when Hillary used her as a human shield at Tusla.

BL@KBIRD on April 17, 2014 at 7:08 PM

And better yet, will he admit it?

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:06 PM

Depends on how much his dad was paid
:O

burrata on April 17, 2014 at 7:09 PM

Congrats to all. Babies are always something to celebrate.

gophergirl on April 17, 2014 at 7:10 PM

A prop is born. . .

socaguy on April 17, 2014 at 7:11 PM

All Hillary has to do to cool her whole house is stand in front of a fan.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 6:49 PM

Hope she doesn’t lift her skirt, I mean pantsuit.

arnold ziffel on April 17, 2014 at 7:11 PM

Weird HL photo
Where’s Daddy?

seesalrun2 on April 17, 2014 at 7:12 PM

If it’s a girl, they will name her ‘Monica’….and a boy…’Ben’…

bimmcorp on April 17, 2014 at 6:45 PM

.
I’m voting for (and there will be a popular vote, there certainly will be…) for Ken, as in Ken Starr. Monica is a given, a shoo in…

ExpressoBold on April 17, 2014 at 7:13 PM

I assume they had all tests for any abnormalities done already so abortion is already ruled out? I mean no one needs to have a less than “perfect” child these days right?

I do have to applaud Chelsea for going against the grain and getting pregnant. I’m sure her feminist friends are giving her a hard time of it, especially since she’s so very “young” to be having a child.

One of the problems with our society is that with people waiting until so late in life to have kids, and most people not truly growing up and learning to become selfless or take a true interest in the future of the country until they have children, our country has less real grown ups than ever.

These late children are also much less likely to have a grandparent active in their life, which has been shown to be important in raising a mentally healthy and stable child. They are also less likely to have siblings and that leads to some difficulties in “playing well with others” their entire lives.

I do hope the best for them and their child. I hope that having a child has a bigger impact on Chelsea than it did on Hillary.

I’d like to think most of us here would not stoop to the level of attacking women because of their looks. I’m not sure that’s true though from what I’ve seen. Perhaps it’s mostly trolls pretending to be conservative/libertarian leaning people?

Annielou on April 17, 2014 at 7:13 PM

I’ll simply wish them Good Luck as new Parents.

Congrats.

ToddPA on April 17, 2014 at 7:14 PM

Hope she doesn’t lift her skirt, I mean pantsuit.

arnold ziffel on April 17, 2014 at 7:11 PM

It’s a miracle Chelsea survived her birth, because she had to pass through the only spot in the universe known to be COLDER than Absolute Zero.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:17 PM

I’ll simply wish them Good Luck as new Parents.

Congrats.

ToddPA on April 17, 2014 at 7:14 PM

Oh my GAWD! Can you imagine the conversations that Bill will have with this tyke someday?

“What did you do during the war, Grampa Bill?”

“Well I can tell you what I didn’t do.”

(pause as he bites his lip and points with thumb tightly clenched against his fist)

“I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Ms. Lewinsky. And I didn’t inhale, either.”

gryphon202 on April 17, 2014 at 7:18 PM

“Mark and I are very excited that we have our first child arriving later this year, and I certainly feel all the better whether it’s a girl or a boy that she or he will grow up in a world full of so many strong young female leaders,” [Chelsea Clinton] said. “So thank you for inspiring me and inspiring future generations including the one that we’ll be lucky enough to welcome into our family later this year.”

Really? She turns the announcement that she will be a mother into a little political speech with female empowerment and inspiration clichees? Wow, how utterly disgusting. She is a Clinton, alright.

Valkyriepundit on April 17, 2014 at 7:18 PM

Weird HL photo
Where’s Daddy?

seesalrun2 on April 17, 2014 at 7:12 PM

curled up in the fetal position so Hillary and Chelsea don’t hurt him any worse.

arnold ziffel on April 17, 2014 at 7:20 PM

Really? She turns the announcement that she will be a mother into a little political speech with female empowerment and inspiration clichees? Wow, how utterly disgusting. She is a Clinton, alright.

Valkyriepundit on April 17, 2014 at 7:18 PM

Being of “royal blood” in a Constitutional Republic with an elected Head of State brings such social responsibilities.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:21 PM

It’s a miracle Chelsea survived her birth, because she had to pass through the only spot in the universe known to be COLDER than Absolute Zero.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:17 PM

Outstanding sir. I like it.

arnold ziffel on April 17, 2014 at 7:22 PM

Where’s Daddy?

seesalrun2 on April 17, 2014 at 7:12 PM

Didn’t you hear what Chelsea said ?
She said ”
she or he will grow up in a world full of so many strong young female leaders,”
and

“I just hope that I will be as good a mom to my child and hopefully children as my mother was to me ”
No mention of words like male , my husband, my dad .
Daddy not needed !

burrata on April 17, 2014 at 7:25 PM

gryphon202 on April 17, 2014 at 7:18 PM

Let me tell you about the time I blew up an aspirin factory, and ordered a cruise missile attack on the headquarters building of some bad guys. I did it at night when the bad guys weren’t there, but I got the janitors and nightwatchmen.

Did I ever you tell the story about when I blew up the Chinese embassy by mistake?

BobMbx on April 17, 2014 at 7:25 PM

Rosemary’s Baby 2:”Chelsea Clinton reveals expecting 1st child” … Bet they call it “Damien”

TeaPartyNation on April 17, 2014 at 7:26 PM

Del Dolemonte on April 17, 2014 at 7:08 PM

^^^THIS^^^

bimmcorp on April 17, 2014 at 7:26 PM

I’d like to think most of us here would not stoop to the level of attacking women because of their looks. I’m not sure that’s true though from what I’ve seen. Perhaps it’s mostly trolls pretending to be conservative/libertarian leaning people?

Annielou on April 17, 2014 at 7:13 PM

I’ve actually always pitied Chelsea. You can’t CHOOSE your parents, and hers have really “set her up”.

But she’s clearly entering the political arena now, and with that, she deserves the same amount of scorn any other leeching, non producing DC Pensioner deserves.

Look on the bright side, at least pregnancy won’t make her any UGLIER… So she has that going for her.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:26 PM

Congrats to all. Babies are always something to celebrate.

gophergirl on April 17, 2014 at 7:10 PM

Especially babies born to liberals…They are a true rarity and quite fortunate to be able to dodge the abortionist…

bimmcorp on April 17, 2014 at 7:28 PM

Really? She turns the announcement that she will be a mother into a little political speech with female empowerment and inspiration clichees? Wow, how utterly disgusting. She is a Clinton, alright.

Valkyriepundit on April 17, 2014 at 7:18 PM

At least she didn’t yak about free birth control for women in this little campaign speech !

burrata on April 17, 2014 at 7:28 PM

“I just hope that I will be as good a mom to my child and hopefully children as my mother was to me ”
No mention of words like male , my husband, my dad .
Daddy not needed !

burrata on April 17, 2014 at 7:25 PM

I guess that is to be expected when your father has less morals than an alley cat hellbent on chasing as many pussycats as he can nail down.

I say less moral because cats lack the same intelligence humans are supposed to have to allow us to override immoral natural impulses…

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:29 PM

If it’s a girl,
will she be safe around Bill Clinton ?

burrata on April 17, 2014 at 7:31 PM

Especially babies born to liberals…They are a true rarity and quite fortunate to be able to dodge the abortionist…

bimmcorp on April 17, 2014 at 7:28 PM

You can bet your ass that if this birth weren’t NECESSARY to continue the Royal Line Chelsea would have had the best “sperm invasion disease” treatment known in the Western World.

IE: the abortionist would have actually CLEANED his instruments, unlike Gosnell…

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:31 PM

If it’s a girl,
will she be safe around Bill Clinton ?

burrata on April 17, 2014 at 7:31 PM

OUCH!

Well, Royal Families are KNOWN for inbreeding… See: Prince Charles.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:32 PM

Hahahaha! Lena Dunham has a Chelsea Clinton uterus fetish

lineholder on April 17, 2014 at 7:33 PM

This post by Ace is Pulitzer Prize worthy funny!

Hillary Clinton Will Soon Be Grandmother

Chelsea Clinton announced her pregnancy.

The 16-week-old fetus has been signed to a six-figure deal to host a new MSNBC show.

Chelsea has reported it kicking, for which the unborn child has received a Walter Cronkite Excellence in Journalism award.

I didn’t care about the “Chelsea is pregnant” storyline — who can keep up with our useless princelings? — until I saw the Drudge headline, “Grandma Hillary.”

Does this help her or hurt her?

Posted by: Ace at 05:55 PM

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:34 PM

Hahahaha! Lena Dunham has a Chelsea Clinton uterus fetish

lineholder on April 17, 2014 at 7:33 PM

And this brings me to a thought to ponder…

Who is the more attractive of the two dumpy, left wing 30-somethings?

Believe it or not I’d say Chelsea. For one thing she doesn’t impose unnecessary and unwanted nudity on the world, and isn’t tatt encrusted.

Still though, waking up beside either of them after an evening at the bar would scare me enough to give up drinking for life!

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:37 PM

Medvedev Molezinski. Margolin Mezvinski.
Something like that.

bettycooper on April 17, 2014 at 7:03 PM

Marc Mezvinsky

rbj on April 17, 2014 at 7:07 PM

Why would anyone want to take a chance joining that insane family? It’s sort of a Hotel California meets Fort Marcy Park deal you know.

slickwillie2001 on April 17, 2014 at 7:38 PM

Babies are always a good thing.

Although I’m not going to get my hopes up for a radical like Chelsea, if there is one thing in this world that can make a liberal at least somewhat less liberal, it’s having a baby – I hope that this child can guide his/her parents down a better path, and bring them closer to the truth.

Children are a gift from God – they are born with His message, and His love, in their hearts.

Pork-Chop on April 17, 2014 at 7:40 PM

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:37 PM

Well, being a female, I try not to be completely unfair to my own sex, BUT…..

IMO, Lena Dunham has an idiot category of her own.

Chelsea is more in the same league with Meghan McCain. Tolerable, but just another spoiled girl of political lineage all the same.

lineholder on April 17, 2014 at 7:40 PM

Why would anyone want to take a chance joining that insane family? It’s sort of a Hotel California meets Fort Marcy Park deal you know.

slickwillie2001 on April 17, 2014 at 7:38 PM

Taylor Swift, in her serial dating then writing songs about the inevitable breakup career, once toyed with the idea of becoming a Kennedy.

Fortunately for her, she can’t stay interested in any guy more than a few weeks, which given the Kennedy family history with women probably saved her life!

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:41 PM

If it’s a girl,
will she be safe around Bill Clinton ?

burrata on April 17, 2014 at 7:31 PM

Don’t know, is she really related to Bill?

slickwillie2001 on April 17, 2014 at 7:41 PM

Who is the more attractive of the two dumpy, left wing 30-somethings?

Believe it or not I’d say Chelsea. For one thing she doesn’t impose unnecessary and unwanted nudity on the world, and isn’t tatt encrusted.

Still though, waking up beside either of them after an evening at the bar would scare me enough to give up drinking for life!

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:37 PM

You know why they call it “coyote ugly,” right Con? Coyotes will chew a limb off to escape a trap. ;)

gryphon202 on April 17, 2014 at 7:41 PM

Chelsea is more in the same league with Meghan McCain. Tolerable, but just another spoiled girl of political lineage all the same.

lineholder on April 17, 2014 at 7:40 PM

It’s a good thing that lesbians can’t get pregnant from each other, because imagine the horror child coupling those two would produce?

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:42 PM

Still though, waking up beside either of them after an evening at the bar would scare me enough to give up drinking for life!

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:37 PM

I question your choice of bars.

BobMbx on April 17, 2014 at 7:43 PM

Don’t know, is she really related to Bill?

slickwillie2001 on April 17, 2014 at 7:41 PM

Well, maybe the unborn child in Chelseas womb isnt really Chelseas baby! Andrew Sullivan should investigate!

Valkyriepundit on April 17, 2014 at 7:44 PM

It’s a good thing that lesbians can’t get pregnant from each other, because imagine the horror child coupling those two would produce?

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:42 PM

That’s just….ewwwwww, gross!!!!

Sort of like imagining the child of Ezra Klein and Chris Matthews.

lineholder on April 17, 2014 at 7:44 PM

Just think of how wonderful it would be if a member of the Clinton Royal Family married a member of the Bush Royal Family and they produced an offspring. He, or she, would probably look like Prince Charles of England. Of what a wonderful day it would be.

VorDaj on April 17, 2014 at 7:03 PM

Remember Hillary’s kid brother, Tony Rodham?

On May 28, 1994, Rodham married Nicole Boxer, daughter of United States Senator from California Barbara Boxer, in a ceremony at the White House attended by 250 guests; it was the first White House wedding since Tricia Nixon married Edward Cox in 1971. They had one son, Zachary, in 1995(who later held a unique distinction in that he was simultaneously the grandson and nephew of sitting U.S. senators), before separating by 2000 and then getting a divorce.

-snip-

By the end of 2007, he was back in the news for owing Nicole Boxer about $158,000 in back alimony, child support, and related payments following a court judgement

Del Dolemonte on April 17, 2014 at 7:45 PM

Why would anyone want to take a chance joining that insane family? It’s sort of a Hotel California meets Fort Marcy Park deal you know.

slickwillie2001 on April 17, 2014 at 7:38 PM

Taylor Swift, in her serial dating then writing songs about the inevitable breakup career, once toyed with the idea of becoming a Kennedy.

Fortunately for her, she can’t stay interested in any guy more than a few weeks, which given the Kennedy family history with women probably saved her life!

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:41 PM

In the Show About Nothing that perfectly summed up the Clinton years, Elaine fantasized about becoming…”Elaine Benes Kennedy, Junior”…

Ironically, in that show’s final episode, the private plane she was riding in nearly crashed into the Atlantic Ocean.

Del Dolemonte on April 17, 2014 at 7:48 PM

I’m always happy when there is a new baby. Best wishes to the entire family.

Cindy Munford on April 17, 2014 at 7:48 PM

The kid’s grandpa is a crook, the paternal one.

Sure, can’t blame the kid, nor his dad. Just a reminder that two sets of crooks are the grandparents. Poor baby.

Schadenfreude on April 17, 2014 at 7:48 PM

here’s HuffPo reporter Sam Stein trying and failing to find something impressive on her resume that would justify handing her the presidency.

Since when does a Democrat need an impressive resume’ to get handed the presidency?

All they need are some Styrofoam columns and a pair of sharply-creased trousers, and the job is theirs.

AZCoyote on April 17, 2014 at 7:49 PM

Hillary looks like the kid’s great-grandmother.

Schadenfreude on April 17, 2014 at 7:49 PM

Sort of like imagining the child of Ezra Klein and Chris Matthews.

lineholder on April 17, 2014 at 7:44 PM

Wonder no more…..

BobMbx on April 17, 2014 at 7:50 PM

Still though, waking up beside either of them after an evening at the bar would scare me enough to give up drinking for life!

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:37 PM

I question your choice of bars.

BobMbx on April 17, 2014 at 7:43 PM

In Huntington, WV you don’t have a lot of choice.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:50 PM

Andrew Sullivan should investigate!

Valkyriepundit on April 17, 2014 at 7:44 PM

I agree 100%.
This is a serious matter.
Our nation’s security depends on it !

burrata on April 17, 2014 at 7:50 PM

Since when does a Democrat need an impressive resume’ to get handed the presidency?

All they need are some Styrofoam columns and a pair of sharply-creased trousers, and the job is theirs.

AZCoyote on April 17, 2014 at 7:49 PM

Or a sharply creased pantsuit in this particular case.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:51 PM

That’s just….ewwwwww, gross!!!!

Sort of like imagining the child of Ezra Klein and Chris Matthews.

lineholder on April 17, 2014 at 7:44 PM

Or Sean Penn and Madonna.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:52 PM

In Huntington, WV you don’t have a lot of choice.

ConstantineXI on April 17, 2014 at 7:50 PM

Going out on a limb here, but I’m guessing there’s precisely a zero percent chance of either of them would ever be found cruising a bar in Huntington.

So you’re safe. Party on, dude.

BobMbx on April 17, 2014 at 7:54 PM

Bmore

Schadenfreude on April 17, 2014 at 7:58 PM

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