Finally: Ted Cruz gets tattooed

posted at 12:01 pm on April 1, 2014 by Allahpundit

To cleanse the palate, via the Corner, consider this the latest bit of 2016 jockeying between Cruz and Rand Paul. Paul’s spent the past year insisting that the party needs to do more to reach out to young voters, once saying, “We need to have people with ties and without ties, with tattoos and without tattoos.” Now watch the clip. Consider this ante upped.

I’d say the odds are 50/50 that, come next year, some unnamed Cruz supporter will tell a major media outlet that Rand has one on his right bicep of Neville Chamberlain. Incidentally, did anyone ever claim responsibility for that Cruz poster in L.A. that made the rounds online a few weeks ago? As funny as it was, it was crudely true to his political brand: He’s the one guy in the prospective presidential field who won’t play by the establishment’s rules, who’s going to do things his way no matter how much contempt is tossed at him. No wonder he’s thinking about making the Winston tat permanent.

If this doesn’t quench your April Fool’s thirst, New York mag has a list of the very worst of today’s jokes on the Internet. And man, are there some stinkers.


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I am so proud of my votes for Ted Cruz. All of them.

No Truce With Kings on April 1, 2014 at 12:05 PM

Ted Cruz handled this like an old pro. Spot on – very cool.

jake-the-goose on April 1, 2014 at 12:06 PM

Meh. Politicians ain’t gonna fix what politicians broke. But God bless Ted Cruz for trying. He’s one of the few good eggs in a terribly dishonorable profession.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:07 PM

Incidentally, did anyone ever claim responsibility for that Cruz poster in L.A. that made the rounds online a few weeks ago?

http://pjmedia.com/lifestyle/2014/03/19/interview-la-street-artist-behind-the-ted-cruz-bad-boy-posters-speaks-out/

Mark1971 on April 1, 2014 at 12:07 PM

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:07 PM

I like everything about your post.

jake-the-goose on April 1, 2014 at 12:08 PM

Incidentally, did anyone ever claim responsibility for that Cruz poster in L.A. that made the rounds online a few weeks ago

Huh? Where have you been ALLAHPUNDIT?

The artist has been widely known for weeks … L.A. artist SABO.

Pork-Chop on April 1, 2014 at 12:09 PM

Wow, a politician being personable. I guess this is the reason why the surrender weasels believe he must be destroyed.

Happy Nomad on April 1, 2014 at 12:09 PM

They are scared.

Schadenfreude on April 1, 2014 at 12:10 PM

Huh? Where have you been ALLAHPUNDIT?

The artist has been widely known for weeks … L.A. artist SABO.

Pork-Chop on April 1, 2014 at 12:09 PM

That’s about the time AP’s cat trapped him in his bedroom without his computer

http://news.msn.com/us/house-cat-in-oregon-attacks-baby-traps-family-in-bedroom

rbj on April 1, 2014 at 12:12 PM

He’s the one guy in the prospective presidential field who won’t play by the establishment’s rules, who’s going to do things his way no matter how much contempt is tossed at him.

THIS is why Ted Cruz has the broadest appeal, and why HE can win.

RUN-TED-RUN!

Pork-Chop on April 1, 2014 at 12:12 PM

“We might have to wake up Shepard Smith” — April Fools

Schadenfreude on April 1, 2014 at 12:12 PM

Make it permanent, Ted. That would rock!

CurtZHP on April 1, 2014 at 12:14 PM

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:07 PM

I like everything about your post.

jake-the-goose on April 1, 2014 at 12:08 PM

…ditto that!

KOOLAID2 on April 1, 2014 at 12:14 PM

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:07 PM

I like everything about your post.

jake-the-goose on April 1, 2014 at 12:08 PM

You flatter me, Jake. I find that being a pessimist means that the surprises I stumble upon are pleasant ones, and politics is no exception.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:15 PM

OT – US beauties on display. Skip the ads.

Schadenfreude on April 1, 2014 at 12:15 PM

Has anyone actually ever read about Churchill’s political career?

He was the epitome ‘opportunist.’ Hopefully someone in the Paul party makes sure to point this out.

Notorious GOP on April 1, 2014 at 12:18 PM

May Hell befall them.

Schadenfreude on April 1, 2014 at 12:18 PM

THIS is why Ted Cruz has the broadest appeal, and why HE can win.

RUN-TED-RUN!

Pork-Chop on April 1, 2014 at 12:12 PM

Ted Cruz is an honest man. This is why he probably won’t run, and won’t make it through the primaries if he does. The presidential campaign process does not reward honesty. The RNC does not reward honesty. And as should be plenty evident from the outcome of ’08 and ’12, the American people do not reward honesty.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:19 PM

There is a positive buzz around him.

Someone photoshop Christie and Jeb at the donuts shop. Wait that is real?!?

Oil Can on April 1, 2014 at 12:20 PM

Hillary will up the ante with a tramp stamp: What difference at this point does it make?!

Christien on April 1, 2014 at 12:21 PM

That’s about the time AP’s cat trapped him in his bedroom without his computer

http://news.msn.com/us/house-cat-in-oregon-attacks-baby-traps-family-in-bedroom

rbj on April 1, 2014 at 12:12 PM

This is a job for Jackson Galaxy.

Christien on April 1, 2014 at 12:23 PM

Incidentally, did anyone ever claim responsibility for that Cruz poster in L.A. that made the rounds online a few weeks ago?

Yes, he has a website (someone here linked to it) which I have visited and purchased the ‘CRUZ’ t-shirt. Can’t wait.

Midas on April 1, 2014 at 12:26 PM

Ted Cruz = Sarah Palin redux. There will be a significant contingent of conservatives rooting for him to run, and if he doesn’t, the long knives will come out over how he “manipulated” and “used” people for money and notoriety.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:29 PM

unsavoryagents.com

Can ‘buy’ (gift for ‘support’ to the artist) the shirt, the poster, etc.

Midas on April 1, 2014 at 12:29 PM

I’m very much looking forward to the day I can vote for Ted Cruz in the GOP primary…

Ted Cruz, Thomas Sowell and Battles Worth Fighting…

imperfectamerica on April 1, 2014 at 12:30 PM

I’m very much looking forward to the day I can vote for Ted Cruz in the GOP primary…

Ted Cruz, Thomas Sowell and Battles Worth Fighting…

imperfectamerica on April 1, 2014 at 12:30 PM

IF he runs. Which he might, but I have my doubts.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:32 PM

Hillary will up the ante with a tramp stamp: What difference at this point does it make?!

Christien on April 1, 2014 at 12:21 PM

Bmore – consider this a personal photoshop request. :)

Midas on April 1, 2014 at 12:32 PM

Hillary will up the ante with a tramp stamp: What difference at this point does it make?!

Christien on April 1, 2014 at 12:21 PM

Bmore – consider this a personal photoshop request. :)

Midas on April 1, 2014 at 12:32 PM

Dunno if you folks ever hang out at

http://www.iowntheworld.com

but the site’s proprietor BigFurHat has a ton of that kind of stuff. And it’s hilarious, if a bit disturbing.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:34 PM

Cruz is the Man!!! He has handled all of this tattoo attention perfectly. We would be fortunate to have him in a leadership roll. Whether that be as POTUS or Senate Leader only time will tell.

Bmore on April 1, 2014 at 12:35 PM

Bmore – consider this a personal photoshop request. :)

Midas on April 1, 2014 at 12:32 PM

Old Chinese proverb: Beware what you wish for.

CurtZHP on April 1, 2014 at 12:36 PM

Ted Cruz is an honest man. This is why he probably won’t run, and won’t make it through the primaries if he does. The presidential campaign process does not reward honesty. The RNC does not reward honesty. And as should be plenty evident from the outcome of ’08 and ’12, the American people do not reward honesty.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:19 PM

I’d still like to see him run, get his name and face out there. If he doesn’t make it, he’ll have more experience for the next time, and in the meantime continue to support Tea Party candidates for both houses.

31giddyup on April 1, 2014 at 12:37 PM

No Truce With Kings on April 1, 2014 at 12:05 PM

Amen to that!

annoyinglittletwerp on April 1, 2014 at 12:37 PM

My Prediction: The GOP will retake the Senate in 2014 and will do absolutely nothing about O’BamaCare and will then be completely thrown out in 2016.

Starlink on April 1, 2014 at 12:36 PM

Ditto that, Link.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:38 PM

Hillary will up the ante with a tramp stamp: What difference at this point does it make?!

Christien on April 1, 2014 at 12:21 PM

Bmore – consider this a personal photoshop request. :)

Midas on April 1, 2014 at 12:32 PM

Lolz! Okay, I’ll see what I can do. Looking at that up close can suck pretty badly though. Gonna be an awful lot of sagging to deal with and still make it legible. ; )

Bmore on April 1, 2014 at 12:38 PM

I already have the poster-came last week-but I might buy the shirt.

annoyinglittletwerp on April 1, 2014 at 12:40 PM

This is a job for Jackson Galaxy.

Christien on April 1, 2014 at 12:23 PM

Apparently the cat is now at a rescue shelter. But yeah, this would have been a good episode.

rbj on April 1, 2014 at 12:40 PM

Has anyone actually ever read about Churchill’s political career?

He was the epitome ‘opportunist.’ Hopefully someone in the Paul party makes sure to point this out.

Notorious GOP on April 1, 2014 at 12:18 PM

You say opportunist as if it were a bad thing. If you had actually read about Churchill’s political career you would. Churchill was out there on his own screaming about Nazi Germany in much the same way Cruz was a voice in the wilderness about Obamacare. And it was that same opportunism that engaged the United States in a Europe First strategy.

And where has Paul been during all this Obamacare turmoil, sitting on the sidelines with all the other surrender weasels whining about Obamacare but doing nothing. Give me an opportunist like Cruz over Rand Paul any day of the week and twice on Sundays!

Happy Nomad on April 1, 2014 at 12:40 PM

Lolz! Okay, I’ll see what I can do. Looking at that up close can suck pretty badly though. Gonna be an awful lot of sagging to deal with and still make it legible. ; )

Bmore on April 1, 2014 at 12:38 PM

Well, I wouldn’t want you to hurt yourself – maybe a couple of those hot nurses can massage you while to do it!

Midas on April 1, 2014 at 12:40 PM

Be aware

Schadenfreude on April 1, 2014 at 12:40 PM

I’d still like to see him run, get his name and face out there. If he doesn’t make it, he’ll have more experience for the next time, and in the meantime continue to support Tea Party candidates for both houses.

31giddyup on April 1, 2014 at 12:37 PM

Isn’t that what folks were saying about Sarah Palin in the run-up to ’12? Some of the long knives after ’12 came after her from people that claimed to be her supporters during the campaign. When I say there is no honor in politics, I’m not just talking about the politicians.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:41 PM

Ted Cruz = Sarah Palin redux. There will be a significant contingent of conservatives rooting for him to run, and if he doesn’t, the long knives will come out over how he “manipulated” and “used” people for money and notoriety.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:29 PM

Damn good post…..these two individuals, more than any others
in American politics , embody the Not For Sale attitude.
People can Whine all damn day about being “used”, eff em.
I will continue to say that these two will team up for 2016…

..they will be RUTHLESS. Maybe neither runs…but I would
bet, as of now, ONE WILL. And the other will wield the Hatchet.
It will be Bloody, and it will be Messy…but oh,
what FUN it will be!!

ToddPA on April 1, 2014 at 12:42 PM

Hillary will up the ante with a tramp stamp: What difference at this point does it make?!

Christien on April 1, 2014 at 12:21 PM

Her stamp will say “Lilith”

Oil Can on April 1, 2014 at 12:42 PM

Hillary will up the ante with a tramp stamp: What difference at this point does it make?!

Christien on April 1, 2014 at 12:21 PM

Given that it’s Killary, wouldn’t that just be a stamp?

Happy Nomad on April 1, 2014 at 12:42 PM

Midas on April 1, 2014 at 12:32 PM

P.S. What ever you do Midas, don’t google search fat naked tattooed lady. Ick!

Bmore on April 1, 2014 at 12:43 PM

Sorry, but nothing on that list the surpass the lamest, un-funniest joke of all.

ZeroCare stands alone.

corona79 on April 1, 2014 at 12:44 PM

Can anyone else hear Dana Carvey doing President Cruz?

BKeyser on April 1, 2014 at 12:44 PM

Rush just played a Puff Dashcle bite! God, I miss that guy. He was always concerned.

Lanceman on April 1, 2014 at 12:44 PM

Rush just played a Puff Dashcle bite! God, I miss that guy. He was always concerned.

Lanceman on April 1, 2014 at 12:44 PM

I am from Tom Daschle’s home town, and we don’t hear much from him anymore. He went full K Street whore years ago after losing his senate leadership post, but strangely enough, I think if he wouldn’t have had that leadership post, he’d probably still be in the senate.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:47 PM

I am from Tom Daschle’s home town, and we don’t hear much from him anymore. He went full K Street whore years ago after losing his senate leadership post, but strangely enough, I think if he wouldn’t have had that leadership post, he’d probably still be in the senate.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:47 PM

Considering that he could have been the critter presiding over HHS and the implementation of Obamacare, I’m guessing he’s happy he was too toxic ethically to have gained Senate confirmation.

My favorite Daschle memory is when, prior to the 2002 elections, he went full crazy in an interview about how the Dems were going to rout the GOP over outrage that Al Gore had been deprived of the Presidency.

Happy Nomad on April 1, 2014 at 12:54 PM

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:47 PM

You know? We never appreciate what we have until it’s gone. Puff Daschle and El Loco Poco Dicko were infinitely preferable to Hairy Reed and San Fran Nan. We’re liable to get Majority Leader Schumer and Speaker Wasserman-Schultz before it’s over, thus causing us to pine for Hairy and Nan.

Lanceman on April 1, 2014 at 12:56 PM

My favorite Daschle memory is when, prior to the 2002 elections, he went full crazy in an interview about how the Dems were going to rout the GOP over outrage that Al Gore had been deprived of the Presidency.

Happy Nomad on April 1, 2014 at 12:54 PM

What happened behind the scenes is even more interesting. As a pro-choice Catholic, Daschle did catch some flack from the chancery office here and his parents even walked out of a mass once during an anti-abortion sermon, but I heard pretty reliable rumors that Daschle’s mother was in tight with sisters from the local Presentation convent. She’d fly ‘em out to her DC villa and donate all kinds of money to the convent, I’m sure so that they wouldn’t actively campaign against her son.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:58 PM

You know? We never appreciate what we have until it’s gone. Puff Daschle and El Loco Poco Dicko were infinitely preferable to Hairy Reed and San Fran Nan. We’re liable to get Majority Leader Schumer and Speaker Wasserman-Schultz before it’s over, thus causing us to pine for Hairy and Nan.

Lanceman on April 1, 2014 at 12:56 PM

Hindsight is always 20-20.

gryphon202 on April 1, 2014 at 12:58 PM

My Prediction: The GOP will retake the Senate in 2014 and will do absolutely nothing about O’BamaCare and will then be completely thrown out in 2016.

Starlink on April 1, 2014 at 12:36 PM

Sadly, I tend to agree.

GWB on April 1, 2014 at 1:05 PM

Rand has one on his right bicep of Neville Chamberlain

LOL! Funny because it is plausible

Norwegian on April 1, 2014 at 1:05 PM

The RINOs are destroying the land. Hate them more than the D-rats.

Schadenfreude on April 1, 2014 at 1:07 PM

Rand has one on his right bicep of Neville Chamberlain

LOL! Funny because it is plausible

Norwegian on April 1, 2014 at 1:05 PM

Or maybe Quisling. Hard to tell whether Paul is an appeaser or a collaborator.

Happy Nomad on April 1, 2014 at 1:13 PM

Mark1971 on April 1, 2014 at 12:07 PM

Thanks for the link, Mark. I’m getting one of those tee shirts. So cool.

magicbeans on April 1, 2014 at 1:15 PM

OT- Is it just me or is this more creepy than weepy…..

A dying California man staged a wedding for his 11-year-old daughter so he would have the chance to walk her down the aisle, the Press-Enterprise reported.

Jim Zetz, 62, has stage 4 pancreatic cancer and won’t live long enough to see his daughter Josie’s real wedding. So for Josie’s birthday, Zetz staged a wedding in their backyard with the help of friends and family, who came together to plan the event in just 72 hours.

Happy Nomad on April 1, 2014 at 1:16 PM

Schadenfreude on April 1, 2014 at 12:15 PM

Curse you for sucking me in. Imprinted now in my brain. Time for the lobotomy.

NOMOBO on April 1, 2014 at 1:21 PM

unsavoryagents.com

Can ‘buy’ (gift for ‘support’ to the artist) the shirt, the poster, etc.

Midas on April 1, 2014 at 12:29 PM

Thanks for the website. His other stuff is quite interesting as well.

kim roy on April 1, 2014 at 1:32 PM

The RINOs are destroying the land. Hate them more than the D-rats.

Schadenfreude on April 1, 2014 at 1:07 PM

I see Democrats have added another group to their burgeoning coalition.

cimbri on April 1, 2014 at 1:32 PM

BREAKING NEWS: Tom Brady traded to the Jets.

myiq2xu on April 1, 2014 at 1:48 PM

Incidentally, did anyone ever claim responsibility for that Cruz poster in L.A.

seriously?

Yes, in fact it has been all over the internets, article after article about the poster creator.

http://www.google.com

just wow.

chuckh on April 1, 2014 at 2:02 PM

The FORCE is strong in this one.

Cowboy Girl on April 1, 2014 at 2:27 PM

BREAKING NEWS: Obama Greatest President And Leader Of All Time.

Bmore on April 1, 2014 at 2:35 PM

Incidentally, did anyone ever claim responsibility for that Cruz poster in L.A. that made the rounds online a few weeks ago?

Yes, I bought the Cruz poster. It was signed by the artist and It is out getting framed and matted.

redguy on April 1, 2014 at 2:48 PM

Or maybe Quisling. Hard to tell whether Paul is an appeaser or a collaborator.

Happy Nomad on April 1, 2014 at 1:13 PM

Ron already got that one inked on his left buttock.

He always had a soft spot for national socialists. Just consider his last statements on Russia.

Norwegian on April 1, 2014 at 3:14 PM

The artist for the poster did come forward.

The fact that this story is three weeks old helped with that, it did take a few days.

Adjoran on April 1, 2014 at 3:22 PM

Winston Churchill:

“How dreadful are the curses which Mohammedanism lays on its votaries! Besides the fanatical frenzy, which is as dangerous in a man as hydrophobia in a dog, there is this fearful fatalistic apathy. The effects are apparent in many countries, improvident habits, slovenly systems of agriculture, sluggish methods
of commerce and insecurity of property exist wherever the followers of the Prophet rule or live. A degraded sensualism deprives this life of its grace and refinement, the next of its dignity and sanctity. The fact that in Mohammedan law every woman must belong to some man as his absolute property, either as a child, a wife, or a concubine, must delay the final extinction of slavery until the
faith of Islam has ceased to be a great power among men.

“Individual Moslems may show splendid qualities, but the influence of the religion paralyzes the social development of those who follow it. No stronger retrograde force exists in the world. Far from being moribund, Mohammedanism is a militant and proselytizing faith. It has already spread throughout Central Africa, raising fearless warriors at every step, and were it not that Christianity is sheltered in the strong arms of science, the science against which it (Islam) has vainly struggled, the civilization of modern Europe might fall, as fell the civilization of ancient Rome.”

WhatSlushfund on April 1, 2014 at 3:52 PM

My Prediction: The GOP will retake the Senate in 2014 and will do absolutely nothing about O’BamaCare and will then be completely thrown out in 2016.
Starlink on April 1, 2014 at 12:36 PM

My prediction: the GOP will tick off its base and draw the lowest turnout ever and lose an easily winnable senate majority

Brock Robamney on April 1, 2014 at 5:29 PM

My (married, father of two) friend tells me the guy in the photo with the tatoos is almost certainly so-and-so, a rapper who is a former gay porn actor.

Anyone got this?

Jaibones on April 1, 2014 at 8:52 PM