Video: God made a trial lawyer

posted at 3:21 pm on March 28, 2014 by Allahpundit

Via Charlie Spiering, if listening to Paul Harvey wax lyrical about the wholesome grit of America’s ambulance chasers doesn’t bring a tear to your eye, well, mister, you’re a better man than I. In fact, I like to imagine the sequel to Harvey’s “God made a farmer” speech would involve a farmhand being lightly injured on the job and Bruce Braley suing the farmer into bankruptcy. That’s the kind of man we need in charge of the public till in Washington.

You know about the gaffe heard ’round the political world but what you might not know is that Braley’s not done gaffing yet. A day after apologizing for sneering that Chuck Grassley was a mere “farmer from Iowa who never went to law school,” Team Braley put out a press release celebrating his own experience with farming — which managed to misspell several farming terms. Then they posted a picture of a farm to their Facebook account. The pic turned out to be of a farm in England. We’re maybe a day away from a photo op of this guy driving a tractor while wearing Gucci loafers.

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The liquor table makes for a nice visual too.

forest on March 28, 2014 at 3:25 PM

Team Braley put out a press release celebrating his own experience with farming — which managed to misspell several farming terms. Then they posted a picture of a farm to their Facebook account. The pic turned out to be of a farm in England.

lol

Murphy9 on March 28, 2014 at 3:27 PM

Yes, Mr. I’m smarter than all you farmers but not smart enough to read the Obamacare law before I shilled relentlessly for it.

Free Indeed on March 28, 2014 at 3:27 PM

I’m sure after amnesty for illegals , Brayley will do fine, since he won’t need Iowa voters .

burrata on March 28, 2014 at 3:30 PM

What do you call a bus full of attorneys going over a cliff? A good start.

Mirimichi on March 28, 2014 at 3:32 PM

And the World was created, and all was well. But, sin entered in and there was great need for those on a fast track to Hell. So, God created democrats…

vnvet on March 28, 2014 at 3:33 PM

He’ll fit in perfectly with the DC scum…

PatriotRider on March 28, 2014 at 3:38 PM

Ya know, one the one hand you want to think ‘This guy’s toast’…

But then again…Barack Obama got a second term.

BigWyo on March 28, 2014 at 3:38 PM

Pope Francis dies and goes to Heaven. When he gets there he is surprised that he is given a shabby studio apartment to spend eternity in. Then he sees a famous lawyer living in a mansion.

When he asks about the difference in living arrangements St. Peter tells him, “We get lots of Popes. We hardly get any lawyers.

myiq2xu on March 28, 2014 at 3:39 PM

Hey, 99% of the lawyers out there give the other 1% of us a bad name.

acasilaco on March 28, 2014 at 3:43 PM

Hey, 99% of the lawyers out there give the other 1% of us a bad name.

acasilaco on March 28, 2014 at 3:43 PM

The Dems don’t like you 1 percenters.

KW64 on March 28, 2014 at 4:01 PM

HaHaHaHa: From his Facebook page gaffetastic:
About Me
I’ve been married for 25 years to a beautiful woman that I first met at an Eagles concert in 1976. The home screen on my cell phone says, “Be a good Dad” to remind me of my most important job. My sons, David and Paul, think I will finally be “somebody” when I’m a guest on the Colbert Report.

I won the Pinewood Derby while a Cub Scout in Brooklyn, Iowa. My first job was delivering the Des Moines Tribune when I was in second grade. Most people don’t know that I was a walk-on for the Iowa State football team in 1977, or that I once played Sky Masterson in Guys and Dolls and Tony in West Side Story. My mother, Marcia Braley, has been teaching in Iowa for nearly 50 years. I started a scholarship fund for injured workers and their families to honor my father, who died in 1981 and had suffered a severe work-related injury when I was two.

Pinewood Derby Champ = qualified for US Senate?
Compare to Patriot, Samclovis.com… 25 yr AF retired wing commander Doctorate, tenured Business professor, Consultant to the Pentagon on RUSSIA and Homeland Security, Successful Businessman!

ConcealedKerry on March 28, 2014 at 4:01 PM

What do you have when you bury six lawyers up to their necks in sand?

Not enough sand.

********

What do lawyers use for birth control?

Their personalities.

tru2tx on March 28, 2014 at 4:01 PM

This guy is unopposed, no primary opponent, the Rats are not doing primaries, saves exposing ones beliefs I guess, plus he keeps all the Trial lawyer big Bucks.
He has not the gravitas to Stand With Sam Clovis!
Sam has primary challengers but is THE most qualified.
Sam Has Citizens United, Phyllis Schafleys, Eagle Forum,400 + county captains and tons of delegates! If it goes to convention.
Sam is the man, plenty of gravitas to stand up to Reid and McConnell!
Several Rinos are in this primary too, but Samclovis.com is THE conservative!

ConcealedKerry on March 28, 2014 at 4:12 PM

I agree that Braley doesn’t know much about farming or he would see the irony in his statement: the farmers I knew back in Minnesota received huge government subsidies and lived very well. I guess he has more in common with some farmers than he thought.

Hat Trick on March 28, 2014 at 4:30 PM

The pic turned out to be of a farm in England.

So they must be buying their stock photos from the same supplier that provided the wrong aircraft and wrong navy ship pictures for the Democratic National Convention.

Hill60 on March 28, 2014 at 4:53 PM

What is the difference between lawyers and hookers?

1. There are some things that hookers won’t do for money.

2. A hooker won’t screw you after you’re dead.

myiq2xu on March 28, 2014 at 6:17 PM

Several Rinos are in this primary too, but Samclovis.com is THE conservative!

ConcealedKerry on March 28, 2014 at 4:12 PM

This girl a RINO is she?

Jaibones on March 28, 2014 at 6:44 PM

tru2tx on March 28, 2014 at 4:01 PM

Hey, just remember you started it.

Q. Why do lawyers wear neckties?

A. To keep the foreskins from coming back up over their faces.

With apologies.

WryTrvllr on March 28, 2014 at 9:27 PM

The pic turned out to be of a farm in England.

So they must be buying their stock photos from the same supplier that provided the wrong aircraft and wrong navy ship pictures for the Democratic National Convention.

Hill60 on March 28, 2014 at 4:53 PM

And the commuter that turned out to be on the London tube.

talkingpoints on March 28, 2014 at 10:01 PM

How do you tell the difference between lawyer roadkill and skunk roadkill?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.

Why don’t sharks eat lawyers?

Professional courtesy.

What’s the difference between a rooster and a lawyer?

Roosters cluck defiance.

talkingpoints on March 28, 2014 at 10:05 PM

From http://www.mylawyerok.com/humour.html

“I have come to the conclusion that one useless man is called a disgrace, two men are called a law firm, and three or more become a Congress.”

John Adams

“A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats.”

Benjamin Franklin

“It is in the trade of lawyers to question everything, yield nothing, and to talk by the hour.”

Thomas Jefferson

Mark Twain was at a dinner party where he gave one of his customary after-dinner speeches. When he had finished a prominent lawyer stood up, shoved his hands in his pockets and said, “Doesn’t it strike this company as unusual that a professional humorist should be so funny?”

Twain responded, “Doesn’t it strike this company as unusual that a lawyer should have both his hands in his own pockets?”

listens2glenn on March 28, 2014 at 11:09 PM