French president assigns ministerial homework assignment; tragicomedy ensues

posted at 5:01 pm on August 18, 2013 by Erika Johnsen

Yes, because if history is any guide, that is usually how Socialism turns out in the long term, right? Via the Telegraph:

French president François Hollande has asked his cabinet to describe France in the year 2025, sparking claims that some are living in “Cloud Cuckoo Land”. …

Ministers were given a month to complete their “summer homework” on their “vision” for France in 12 years with answers due to be handed in on Monday. …

In documents leaked by Le Point magazine, Pierre Moscovici, finance minister, warned that the exercise could be “risky” if allowed to turn into “public policy fiction”.

But he went on to predict “full employment” by the year 2025, describing it as a “realistic aim” for a country in which the jobless rate is currently approaching the 11 per cent mark.

Typically bombastic is Arnaud Montebourg, the industrial recovery minister and self-styled champion of “Le Made in France”. He sees his country as a world leader in a wealth of industrial sectors from nanotechnology to rail.

Oh, boy. The French government is wiping their brows over a better-than-”expected” emergence from their latest stretch of economic recession, but Hollande has been struggling beneath plunging approval ratings after hardly even a year in office; he’s been making some pretty far-fetched displays of France’s economic outlook, and I have the gravest doubts that this was really an exercise in defining his ministers’ goals and ambitions for their departments as it was some kind of ill-conceived PR stunt designed to help assuage the country’s deep-seated pessimism with fantasies about their policies’ prospects.

I’m with these guys:

The forecasts received a mixed press, with Le Figaro scoffing at the “idyllic vision” of some, l’Express calling them “self-congratulatory” and France TV headlining its article: “Ministers in Cloud Cuckoo Land.” Right-wing senator Roger Karoutchi, meanwhile, suggested the tone was reminiscent of Alice in Wonderland.


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Bankrupt and living in dhimmitude?

rbj on August 18, 2013 at 5:07 PM

Typically bombastic is Arnaud Montebourg, the industrial recovery minister and self-styled champion of “Le Made in France”. He sees his country as a world leader in a wealth of industrial sectors from nanotechnology to rail.

That’s painful…I don’t care who you are.

Resist We Much on August 18, 2013 at 5:07 PM

Paristan?

iurockhead on August 18, 2013 at 5:08 PM

Resist We Much on August 18, 2013 at 5:07 PM

Could Arnaud be the French version of Willie Lohman?

“Death of a Frenchman”

iurockhead on August 18, 2013 at 5:10 PM

So how many predictions involve France as the Second-Most-Northwestern Region of the Grand Caliphate?

Gingotts on August 18, 2013 at 5:13 PM

Russia had five year plans. France pins hope on twelve year plans. I expect the French will have less success than the Soviets ever did.

Liam on August 18, 2013 at 5:16 PM

French president François Hollande has asked his cabinet to describe France in the year 2025, sparking claims that some are living in “Cloud Cuckoo Land”. …

…has he talked to our clocks?

KOOLAID2 on August 18, 2013 at 5:21 PM

Ministers were given a month to complete their “summer homework” on their “vision” for France in 12 years with answers due to be handed in on Monday.

That — sounds about right, actually.

Big, sweeping vision is what this is all about. Big, big, big, sweeping, epic, theatrical, teary-eyed, passionate, metaphor-laden vision. Their whole experiment is made of that. Of course the government should incorporate these exercises.

1. If France were a tree, would it A. End poverty, B. Bring joy, C. All of the above. [C]

2. If Socialism were God, would it be A. A little better than any false religion, B. A lot better, C. The very comparison is blasphemous. [C]

3. If France were wearing a thong, would it A. Be tasteful, B. Look magnificent, C. Inspire understandable envy, D. All of the above . . .

Axe on August 18, 2013 at 5:25 PM

The reason that these exercises are always a fiasco is that the things that you are not allowed to talk about and include in your predictions are very important things, otherwise they would not be so “hot” that you had to shut up about them. In other words the factors that you have to exclude from your analysis are the most important ones.

This made planning a black joke in the Soviet Union, where “unacceptable” topics included the “nationalities” issue, which in fact would drive the breakup of the whole project.

It’s the same in France.

And it’s the same in America, where you can’t plan for what will really happen because as soon as you mention the important factors your career is over.

There are other reasons “futurism” is for fools. But that one’s good enough.

David Blue on August 18, 2013 at 5:36 PM

Axe on August 18, 2013 at 5:25 PM

Actually, I wouldn’t mind seeing France in a thong. If there is one thing France does right, it is picking good looking women as the personification of their country.

Scopper on August 18, 2013 at 5:39 PM

Actually, I wouldn’t mind seeing France in a thong. If there is one thing France does right, it is picking good looking women as the personification of their country.

Scopper on August 18, 2013 at 5:39 PM

Weird. I wasn’t thinking of a woman in a thong. :) I was thinking of François in a thong.

. . . O no.

*checks pulse*

Axe on August 18, 2013 at 5:45 PM

Actually, I wouldn’t mind seeing France in a thong. If there is one thing France does right, it is picking good looking women as the personification of their country.

Scopper on August 18, 2013 at 5:39 PM

…well…if they shave!

KOOLAID2 on August 18, 2013 at 5:52 PM

Actually, I wouldn’t mind seeing France in a thong. If there is one thing France does right, it is picking good looking women as the personification of their country.

Scopper on August 18, 2013 at 5:39 PM

Yet if I remember correctly the last one they chose was a Ukrainian.

Unfortunately she’s a batcrap crazy Ukrainian.

Gingotts on August 18, 2013 at 6:05 PM

… their “vision” for France in 12 years …

Detroit?

ShainS on August 18, 2013 at 6:42 PM

… their “vision” for France in 12 years …

Detroit?

ShainS on August 18, 2013 at 6:42 PM

With some Dearborn thrown it for good measure.

Resist We Much on August 18, 2013 at 6:50 PM

With some Dearborn thrown it for good measure.

Resist We Much on August 18, 2013 at 6:50 PM

Lots of Dearbornistan.

I’ll give Hollande this much credit. Asking his cabinet to go out there and come up with a 12-year vision is far more creative than anything that has come out of the White House under a rat-eared socialist and his crowd of unelected and unconfirmed czars.

The problem is that this appears to be a public relations exercise where “smart power” is going to save France in 12 years. I would be more impressed with a no-kidding 12-year assessment that is not for public consumption. It is an exercise I think should occur in the United States. Obamacare and the economic “recovery” are based on wildly unrealistic assumptions. There should be a realistic assessment that really guides public policy.

Happy Nomad on August 18, 2013 at 7:41 PM

… their “vision” for France in 12 years …

Detroit?

ShainS on August 18, 2013 at 6:42 PM

With some Dearborn thrown it for good measure.

Resist We Much on August 18, 2013 at 6:50 PM

Aka Chicago, right now.

cheers

eon

eon on August 18, 2013 at 8:35 PM

… their “vision” for France in 12 years …

Detroit?

ShainS on August 18, 2013 at 6:42 PM

LOL

Tasha on August 18, 2013 at 9:02 PM

If Obama is a Marxist dolt and Hollande is a Marxist dolt will Claudine uncharacteristically shaving her armpits in Pigalle save the French economy?

viking01 on August 18, 2013 at 10:15 PM

Under the German flag……

Last time it only took 6-8 weeks.
Those German Leopard tanks are much faster and they won’t get bogged down in the sand on the beaches.
I hear Rommel’s grandson is ready to go…..

Bubba Redneck on August 18, 2013 at 10:19 PM

Muslim No Go Zones and a craven populace forbidden to drink wine in Francistan?

profitsbeard on August 18, 2013 at 10:20 PM

Bubba Redneck on August 18, 2013 at 10:19 PM

Tanks? Rommel? Who needs tanks? By 2025 a French economy under Socialism will be bankrupt enough that Germany can just buy the whole country like Newsweek with one Reichsmark Euro.

Sadly, I still expect Sharia Franceistan to be the more likely outcome….

Sarkozy ’17 to the rescue?

Gingotts on August 18, 2013 at 10:59 PM

A couple “five year plans” topped off with a shorter “laser focused” two year plan and it’s a sure thing, just like the Communist USSR.

RJL on August 19, 2013 at 12:33 AM

Projecting a future 12 years from now entails looking at what one believes and deciding that it will turn out to be true. It would be difficult for someone to take current events, what one believes, and say that the outcome in 12 years is going to be anything other than very reasonable good or rosy good.

Certainly they would not say that the problems they face now will continue and may even be exacerbated with stagnation and possible decline resulting.

Russ808 on August 19, 2013 at 3:28 AM

Back in 2004, I decided to make my own “ten year plan” projection of Europe’s future, predicting what it would look like in 2015.

Behold:

Europe 2015

The leaders of the European Union have agreed on a “road map” for the future. Sources close to the negotiations released the map to the media, showing how the EU’s leaders expect Europe to look in 2015, at the end of a ten-year plan they hope to adopt next year:

Litle did I imagine how accurate my projection would be! Especially the part where the nation formerly known as France will instead be renamed “The Islamic Republic of New Algeria.”

Zombie on August 19, 2013 at 3:52 AM

Tractor production…..Up!

Our five year plan is brilliant, Natasha!

Deafdog on August 19, 2013 at 8:24 AM

I think the key ingredient that they are overlooking is inspirational speeches. Let’s offer to trade them Obama for Carla Bruni.

drunyan8315 on August 19, 2013 at 9:30 AM