Breaking: Terrible sporting event to be terrible in slightly different way next year

posted at 4:21 pm on July 31, 2013 by Allahpundit

How do you solve the problem with a game where everyone’s afraid to play hard for fear of injury? Simple: Just, uh, scramble the rosters. And take away kickoffs, because those are never exciting.

Problem solved.

The NFL is overhauling the Pro Bowl, eliminating the AFC-NFC format in favor of captains picking 43 players per team regardless of conference…

A coin toss will determine which squad gets the game’s opening possession. The ball will be placed at the 25-yard line at the start of the game and after scoring plays. Since there will be no kickoffs, the kick-return specialist Pro Bowl roster spot will be replaced with an additional defensive back spot…

Voting for the game also will be changed, as conference affiliation no longer will be considered in determining the All-Star selections. The two leading vote-getters will be named captains and will be assisted by Hall of Famers Jerry Rice and Deion Sanders and two NFL.com fantasy football champions in picking the two teams.

In other words, they’ve turned the Pro Bowl into a giant promo for the NFL’s online fantasy football league. There’s even going to be a televised “Pro Bowl draft,” in case you’re emotionally invested in which AFC receivers Aaron Rodgers will get to throw to in light coverage.

If they’re going to go gimmicky on it, why not go all the way? Recruit a team of college all-stars and have them play the All-Pros. The kids might actually play hard because they have something to prove. Or add a five-second play clock. Let’s see what old man Peyton can do when he’s forced to run a hurry-up offense for two quarters straight. Good lord, America: How does this fiasco get more viewers than the MLB All-Star Game?


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Now all the NFL has to do is overhaul Aloha Stadium.

Del Dolemonte on July 31, 2013 at 4:24 PM

Who gives a Fu*k about the Pro Bowl….Bring on

THE STEEELERS!!

ToddPA on July 31, 2013 at 4:24 PM

Good lord, America: How does this fiasco get more viewers than the MLB All-Star Game?

“more viewers”

That’s like saying Piers Morgan gets more viewers than Madcow. In the grand scheme of things, they’re both a waste of air time.

Dr. ZhivBlago on July 31, 2013 at 4:25 PM

That sounds positively awful.

And in many ways, ripping off the NHL.

Red Cloud on July 31, 2013 at 4:25 PM

The NFL is following the NHL’s lead? This really has become bizarro world. The NHL has done this player draft for the all-star game before. It’s mildly amusing watching the players interact and giving each other a hard time, but only if you’re a die hard fan.

Flange on July 31, 2013 at 4:25 PM

..or as the late great Myron Cope used to say

THE STILLERS!!!!

ToddPA on July 31, 2013 at 4:26 PM

Ugh.
Hot Gas is a bit gassier today because of this post about this extremely forgettable & irrelevant event.

22044 on July 31, 2013 at 4:28 PM

Keep the kickoffs, and play flag football.

faraway on July 31, 2013 at 4:28 PM

Man, this is a slow news day.

SailorMark on July 31, 2013 at 4:29 PM

A coin toss will determine which squad gets the game’s opening possession. The ball will be placed at the 25-yard line at the start of the game and after scoring plays. Since there will be no kickoffs, the kick-return specialist Pro Bowl roster spot will be replaced with an additional defensive back spot…

If I had my way, there wouldn’t be an actual “Pro Bowl” game…just make a weekend out of best kickers competition, best passes competition, etc to showcase talent we don’t normally get to see during the season. That way, there’s still the great economic impact for Hawaii per ticket sales and such.

The pro-bowl game itself is a joke.

I hope the whole “no kick-off” thing doesn’t make it’s way to regular season games.

JetBoy on July 31, 2013 at 4:33 PM

They should just play flag football instead.

HakerA on July 31, 2013 at 4:35 PM

Never occurs to them to NOT have the game?

nobar on July 31, 2013 at 4:36 PM

Just another reason to not watch that particular game.

Jabberwock on July 31, 2013 at 4:36 PM

The Pro Bowl was bad enough … and now they’ve made it even less watchable. I didn’t think that was possible.

aunursa on July 31, 2013 at 4:39 PM

don’t watch the pro bowl, haven’t in years, don’t watch many pre-season games except for the last one where the guys on the bubble tend to be ferocious in their attempts to get a spot on the roster

DanMan on July 31, 2013 at 4:40 PM

NFL All-stars vs. Hungry lions.

rbj on July 31, 2013 at 4:41 PM

The no-kickoffs modification is definitely a test to see if they think they can add it to regular season games.

I hope it fails.

22044 on July 31, 2013 at 4:42 PM

Recruit a team of college all-stars and have them play the All-Pros.

They actually used to have something like that. The reigning Super Bowl champion played a bunch of college all-stars in a pre-season game. It was discontinued after 1976.

aunursa on July 31, 2013 at 4:42 PM

NFL All-stars vs. Hungry lions.

rbj on July 31, 2013 at 4:41 PM

Most years that would be the only way to get a Lion in the pro bowl.

Flange on July 31, 2013 at 4:43 PM

America has been neutered. Unfortunately Carlos Dangers hasn’t been (yet).

phreshone on July 31, 2013 at 4:43 PM

For each side,

Six quarterbacks, six running backs, and eighteen receivers/tight ends

Six defensive linemen, six linebackers and eighteen cornerbacks or safeties.

For each series, one offensive group of QB, RB and three receivers/tight ends against one lineman, one LB and three CB/SF and each group must remain out for the whole series.

One of the receivers snaps the ball, and whether it’s a run or pass, the defensive lineman begins to count,

One Mississippi, Two Mississippi, Three Mississippi

Reno_Dave on July 31, 2013 at 4:44 PM

Here’s an Idea:

The NFL could hold the Running Man event every Thanksgiving
Weekend. They take a guy (thug) who has disgraced the game,
and have them try to escape the players (two from each team)
who try to catch them, and beat the Hell out of them

This year’s game would feature Mass Murderer Aaron Hernandez.
(you know he has more bodies hidden)
They could also have an Old Timer’s event, with OJ.
(he just got paroled)

ToddPA on July 31, 2013 at 4:45 PM

Based on ESPN’s 24/7 coverage of football, why don’t they just have end zone dances and Twitter battles?

faraway on July 31, 2013 at 4:45 PM

Screw football. I’m a baseball babe. Go Cubbies!

annoyinglittletwerp on July 31, 2013 at 4:49 PM

In a few years we are going to get the “Super-Duper Bowl” where the Super Bowl champs play the All-Star team for bragging rights.

Shortly after that, the NFL will just air the Puppy Bowl as it has more action than the Pro-Bowl does.

Blu3Yeti on July 31, 2013 at 4:51 PM

The NFL is more violent off the field than on the field.

viking01 on July 31, 2013 at 4:53 PM

They could make them play in mankini’s. That would answer the threat posed by the Lingerie Bowl.

BobMbx on July 31, 2013 at 4:55 PM

They still have the Pro-Bowl???? The reality is that they are going to use this as a way to “gently” ease in the no kickoff idiocy. Punts will be next on the “to-go” list. The “wussification” of the NFL continues. Paging the commissioner, your testicles have yet to descend, haven’t they?

TQM38a on July 31, 2013 at 4:55 PM

Recruit a team of college all-stars and have them play the All-Pros.

Actually, this is a much better idea than a silly fantasy football promotional event.

The old College All-Star game was often fun to watch. In 42 years the college guys actually won 10 or 11 and tied a couple of times. Occasionally generated some real drama, unlike never for modern Pro-Bowl.

Pro Bowl was predicated originally on animosity ginned up between old AFL/NFL, but no one remembers that anymore.

bigjack on July 31, 2013 at 4:56 PM

Recruit a team of college all-stars and have them play the All-Pros.

They actually used to have something like that. The reigning Super Bowl champion played a bunch of college all-stars in a pre-season game. It was discontinued after 1976.

aunursa on July 31, 2013 at 4:42 PM

Yup, because the decades old game provided quite a mismatch with lopsided scores favoring the pros toward the end. A bunch of college players who most have never played together find it quite difficult to play a powerful team like the Superbowl Champ, which was the opposition.

IIRC, that last game in 1976 was interrupted close to the end of the 3rd Q by a torrential downpour, Steelers up 24-0 and fans coming on the flooded field to take down the goalposts. By consensus the game ended right then and there, never to be played again.

The NFL led the series 31-9-2.

hawkeye54 on July 31, 2013 at 4:56 PM

If they’re going to go gimmicky on it, why not go all the way? Recruit a team of college all-stars and have them play the All-Pros. The kids might actually play hard because they have something to prove.

The College All-Pros vs the NFL champ ended after the college boys knocked off one of Lombardi’s teams in the early ’60s (I want to say 1963).

Steve Eggleston on July 31, 2013 at 4:58 PM

Pro Bowl was predicated originally on animosity ginned up between old AFL/NFL, but no one remembers that anymore.

bigjack on July 31, 2013 at 4:56 PM

I find it a meaningless bore. Watched it once back in the 70′s, turned it off at the half and never saw one again.

It does provide a reward for the players and their families involved….they get an all expense paid vacation in Hawaii for being in the game, I believe.

hawkeye54 on July 31, 2013 at 4:59 PM

They still play a Pro-Bowl?

Where? Attica?

Another Drew on July 31, 2013 at 5:00 PM

I stand corrected; it was the 1976 rainout that ended it.

Steve Eggleston on July 31, 2013 at 5:00 PM

It’s 5 o’clock somewhere.

faraway on July 31, 2013 at 5:00 PM

Maybe a team of college all-stars vs. pro all-stars, neither group having played before as a team, would be a better game and provide for more gimmicky fan input…

bigjack on July 31, 2013 at 5:01 PM

They still play a Pro-Bowl?

Where? Attica?

Another Drew on July 31, 2013 at 5:00 PM

Heh, any more that would be a fitting venue.

hawkeye54 on July 31, 2013 at 5:01 PM

The NFL players are anxious to get back under lights that aren’t in an interrogation room.

Adjoran on July 31, 2013 at 5:03 PM

Texas high schools play a 7 on 7 flag type championship every summer.All schools can play regardless of class.Sometimes a 100 population town wins the title against the big boys.Since the NFL is heading that way now that the lawyers are involved the 7 on 7 format could be a winner for the owners.No concussions or serious injuries, smaller squads and payrolls.

docflash on July 31, 2013 at 5:03 PM

Good lord, America: How does this fiasco get more viewers than the MLB All-Star Game?

I’m equal opportunity. I think they both suck!

deepdiver on July 31, 2013 at 5:07 PM

O/T Did anyone see Sen. Paul on Cavuto? Cavuto was tough on him but Sen. Paul is trying to cool the exchange of insults with Christie.

Cindy Munford on July 31, 2013 at 5:09 PM

deepdiver on July 31, 2013 at 5:07 PM

Let’s no leave out the NBA when we’re discussing suckdom.

Cindy Munford on July 31, 2013 at 5:10 PM

Out of the 4-5 All-Star games each year, I think MLB is the best.

But that’s like asking me which dental procedure is my preference.

22044 on July 31, 2013 at 5:12 PM

Might as well – the NFL will be out of business in 10 years anyway.

jake-the-goose on July 31, 2013 at 5:13 PM

How does this fiasco get more viewers than the MLB All-Star Game?

Because, umm, the NFL is an exciting game with a crappy all-star game, and the MLB is a boring game with a crappy all-star game.

kirkill on July 31, 2013 at 5:13 PM

Screw football. I’m a baseball babe. Go Cubbies!

annoyinglittletwerp on July 31, 2013 at 4:49 PM

when my kids were in college the UT one brought his buddy from Lubbock and the Aggie had a friend from Midland join us for an Astros/Cubs game. Both of the interlopers were Cubs fans because of satellite TV. We had a blast with about a dozen of them total and those two ended up sitting a couple of rows away to get away from the taunts as the Cubs went down. good times

Man I hate we’re in the toy league now.

DanMan on July 31, 2013 at 5:22 PM

Expand the Puppy Bowl. There is nothing more exciting than seeing red flags thrown for poopies.

Blake on July 31, 2013 at 5:23 PM

Screw football. I’m a baseball babe. Go Cubbies!

annoyinglittletwerp on July 31, 2013 at 4:49 PM

Down to last place.

Damn Selig for making me hate the Cubs.

Steve Eggleston on July 31, 2013 at 5:26 PM

New rule for Pro Bowl designed to reduce injury:
2 pass receptions = 1st down

I know, it sounds like a joke. Now.

“I think the Battle of Network Stars should be fought with guns”
-Steve Martin

rihar on July 31, 2013 at 5:27 PM

How does this fiasco get more viewers than the MLB All-Star Game?

Because, umm, the NFL is an exciting game with a crappy all-star game, and the MLB is a boring game with a crappy all-star game.

Sounds about right to me.

hawkeye54 on July 31, 2013 at 5:27 PM

Football, like everything else in this country is being destroyed by political correctness or nanny state socialists. For those who long for the glory days of Mom, apple pie and Chevrolet……oh, and Led Zeppelin, check out this trailer for the upcoming (and very cool looking) American Hustler.
God Bless America! …and Amy Adams….and Jennifer Lawrence.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhB6o3Dtwjs#at=14

AmeriCuda on July 31, 2013 at 5:27 PM

Wow, I’m pretty surprised by the ignorant comments regarding the NFL here. Sounds a lot like liberals that think people should only enjoy leisure activities that they approve of.

Of course you only hear the bad news regarding NFL players, unless it’s Tim Tebow. 99% of the players are great citizens and they give back to the community a lot more than some idiot “organizer” from Chicago.

GB2

kirkill on July 31, 2013 at 5:30 PM

Baseball is the only sport that should have an All-Star game. The NFL Pro-Bowl is played like a glorified pre-season game, and the NBA and NHL games are made up of guys taking turns showing off.

joejm65 on July 31, 2013 at 5:34 PM

Ways to improve the Pro Bowl:

1) Put a wig and lipstick on a tackling dummy and have a wife-beating contest.

2) Hold the pro bowl in Colorado and have a pot-smoking contest.

3) Hold the pro bowl on a hollywood set and have a nightclub brawl contest.

4) Octagon!

5) Hold the pro bowl at a new york superior court, with mock trials, and see who can hire the best criminal defense attorney.

jaime on July 31, 2013 at 5:35 PM

Please, tax me more to support these welfare recipients!

MNHawk on July 31, 2013 at 5:43 PM

I watch the pro bowl every year. Not for the *ahem* ‘game’. I just like to see images of Hawaii in late January. I can here that steel guitar now~~~~~~

Plus, you can bet the over. It’s as sure a bet as you can find.

birdhurd on July 31, 2013 at 5:53 PM

Why don’t we just jump to having the players battle each other one on one in Madden NFL?
The Pro Bowl is now degraded almost to that level of insignificance anyway.

dentarthurdent on July 31, 2013 at 5:59 PM

Out of the 4-5 All-Star games each year, I think MLB is the best.
But that’s like asking me which dental procedure is my preference.

22044 on July 31, 2013 at 5:12 PM

Your second line is the key. Did you watch the MLB All-Star game this year? Even more boring than most of the regular games.

dentarthurdent on July 31, 2013 at 6:03 PM

22044 on July 31, 2013 at 5:12 PM

Thanks, I’ll just have a cleaning please.

kirkill on July 31, 2013 at 6:09 PM

I am an NFL and Steelers fan…..but the Pro Bowl?? ZZzzzzzz.

CW on July 31, 2013 at 6:11 PM

DanMan on July 31, 2013 at 5:22 PM

The Cubs can tell us fans that it could be worse…they could be as bad as the ‘Stros. LoL

Btw: I once went back/forth online with one of the fathers of ‘catblogging’ during a Cubs/Astros game…for 17 innings. Cubs won. LoL

annoyinglittletwerp on July 31, 2013 at 6:13 PM

Let them play humpbots!

fogw on July 31, 2013 at 6:21 PM

If they get rid of the kickoff altogether, then I’m finding a new sport. The game has become pansy-ass already.

BigGator5 on July 31, 2013 at 6:35 PM

*yawn*

I never watch it anyway…

ladyingray on July 31, 2013 at 6:49 PM

Your second line is the key. Did you watch the MLB All-Star game this year? Even more boring than most of the regular games.

dentarthurdent on July 31, 2013 at 6:03 PM

I missed it as I had plans that night. I’ll admit, I would have watched it.

22044 on July 31, 2013 at 6:57 PM

Good lord, America: How does this fiasco get more viewers than the MLB All-Star Game?

One word: Cheerleaders.

Actually, four words: Cheerleaders in skimpy outfits.

Nutstuyu on July 31, 2013 at 6:58 PM

If they get rid of the kickoff altogether, then I’m finding a new sport. The game has become pansy-ass already.

BigGator5 on July 31, 2013 at 6:35 PM

Major League Lacrosse baby!!!

Nutstuyu on July 31, 2013 at 6:58 PM

The MLS all-star game is tonight. I might watch it, lol

22044 on July 31, 2013 at 6:59 PM

Your second line is the key. Did you watch the MLB All-Star game this year? Even more boring than most of the regular games.

dentarthurdent on July 31, 2013 at 6:03 PM

Maybe the MLB All-Star game worked best back in the day when there were only 16 teams and coverage was only on radio, newspapers and newsreels, and baseball was king in American sports in a simpler time. Maybe it meant more then to the fans of the game. It may have been the only chance to see the top stars of the other league play up close and personal in your town if it was hosting the game.

hawkeye54 on July 31, 2013 at 7:01 PM

Texas high schools play a 7 on 7 flag type championship every summer.All schools can play regardless of class.Sometimes a 100 population town wins the title against the big boys.Since the NFL is heading that way now that the lawyers are involved the 7 on 7 format could be a winner for the owners.No concussions or serious injuries, smaller squads and payrolls.

docflash on July 31, 2013 at 5:03 PM

If they get rid of the kickoff altogether, then I’m finding a new sport. The game has become pansy-ass already.

BigGator5 on July 31, 2013 at 6:35 PM

Rugby Sevens baby!!!

Nutstuyu on July 31, 2013 at 7:01 PM

The MLS all-star game is tonight. I might watch it, lol

22044 on July 31, 2013 at 6:59 PM

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hawkeye54 on July 31, 2013 at 7:03 PM

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL!!!!

hawkeye54 on July 31, 2013 at 7:03 PM

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hawkeye54 on July 31, 2013 at 7:03 PM

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL!!!!

hawkeye54 on July 31, 2013 at 7:03 PM

Yes, Sir!

22044 on July 31, 2013 at 7:54 PM

Meh.

The game had what? 6 players in it last year-from what was arguably the worst AFC team -The Chefs?

Don’t tweek it, euthanize it.

socalcon on July 31, 2013 at 8:10 PM

Wow, Shaun Rogers from the Lions in the middle of the photo? How many years old is this picture?

8 weight on July 31, 2013 at 8:12 PM

I missed it as I had plans that night. I’ll admit, I would have watched it.

22044 on July 31, 2013 at 6:57 PM

We watched since there were 3 Rockies in the NL starting lineup – none of them did much of anything – which pretty much sums up the entire game.

dentarthurdent on July 31, 2013 at 8:23 PM

I quit watching the Pro Bowl game years ago. It had become a joke with the players looking like clowns. As far as I’m concerned, they can make all the changes they want, I still will not watch it.

savage24 on July 31, 2013 at 8:40 PM

When football got rid of the batter is when I stopped paying attention anyway.

Limerick on July 31, 2013 at 10:11 PM

What worries me is that Great Roger is probably using this as a trial balloon to eliminate kickoffs altogether.

HitNRun on July 31, 2013 at 10:12 PM

While you’re at it NFL. Let’s take a vote and make sure we include everyone, to see where to place the field goals.

I vote for the 37 yard line on either side. (that way all kickers have a FAIR shot at it) sarc

Kinda like our current voting system, everyone should vote on something they know nothing about really….but know what’s best.

-west

mr_west on July 31, 2013 at 11:19 PM

Oh? Really? Er to whom is she texting what pictures? Why else would she support a total creep?

{^_^}

herself on August 1, 2013 at 2:20 AM

Since there will be no kickoffs, the kick-return specialist Pro Bowl roster spot will be replaced with an additional defensive back spot…

Dante Hall hardest hit.

The Schaef on August 1, 2013 at 10:54 AM