Bikini baristas busted: Reason’s Nanny of the Month

posted at 3:21 pm on April 2, 2013 by Ed Morrissey

With practically every level of American government in a deep fiscal hole and profound issues of liberty and justice requiring attention, what are lawmakers doing to govern us? As Reason’s Nanny of the Month feature routinely reminds us, mostly climbing on hobby horses and doing their best to ignore the real issues.  In their March roundup, the great news is that the enormously serious issue of properly-clothed baristas is finally under control:

Lawmakers are no longer loco for just one brand of energy drink. Illinois State Rep. Luis Arroyo (D-Chicago) has penned a bill that would make it illegal “to sell, offer for sale or deliver” just about any kind of energy drink to anyone under age 18 (Arroyo’s championing another top-tier issue–outlawing lion steaks).

Meanwhile, dog lovers in Oklahoma are sounding off against a plan cooked up by State Sen. Patrick Anderson (R-Enid) to allow cities to ban specific breeds of dogs (stay tuned for the surprise twist!).

But this time the Nanny of the Month comes to us from Shelton, WA where city commissioners and townspeople alike have united against a threat of bikini baristas!

 

The truly sad part of this month’s winner is that this fight has been going on for five years, at least in the state of Washington. No, seriously. Five years ago next month, this made network news, oh-so-coincidentally during sweeps month:

Visit NBCNews.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

While I sympathize with the viewpoints of local residents, government intervention is hardly the answer. If the dress code doesn’t violate any other laws (which might be the case with the pasties), then the proper response is to raise awareness and organize a free-market response that fails to reward that kind of marketing strategy. Emphasizing the demeaning aspect of being put on display in this manner to the young women in the local area might also make the hiring costs steep enough to curtail the profit potential of bikini baristas. If residents can’t win those arguments, then a resort to government force would be illegitimate anyway, at least in an ethical sense.

Which of these deserve to be the winner? Take the poll:

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She needs a bikini top for that schnoz.

NoDonkey on April 2, 2013 at 3:22 PM

All three should win.

chemman on April 2, 2013 at 3:26 PM

Can you PLEASE get rid of the expedia ads that play automatically on landing with no way to stop them until several seconds into the video? On my home computer it isn’t a problem, those are blocked, but it makes visiting your site on my work computer an issue. I can’t install ad blocker software on the work computer.

crosspatch on April 2, 2013 at 3:26 PM

Nanny staters are the worse. The sad fact is the the right has their share as well – SoCons.

MoreLiberty on April 2, 2013 at 3:26 PM

Gatorade hardest hit.

BobMbx on April 2, 2013 at 3:29 PM

“…then the proper response is to raise awareness and organize a free-market response that fails to reward that kind of marketing strategy.”

Heretic…!

… Take the time in the re-education camp to reflect upon your blasphemy.

/

Seven Percent Solution on April 2, 2013 at 3:29 PM

I disapprove of skanky-looking baristas-but in that case I’d vote w/my wallet. Capitalism baby!

annoyinglittletwerp on April 2, 2013 at 3:31 PM

Can you PLEASE get rid of the expedia ads that play automatically on landing with no way to stop them until several seconds into the video? On my home computer it isn’t a problem, those are blocked, but it makes visiting your site on my work computer an issue. I can’t install ad blocker software on the work computer.

crosspatch on April 2, 2013 at 3:26 PM

Sure – just send HotAir a quarter every time you look at the site.

redguy on April 2, 2013 at 3:31 PM

This is a tough poll choice. The attacks on individual liberty are coming like birdshot. But I picked the doggies because, you know, who doesn’t like doggies?

Fenris on April 2, 2013 at 3:32 PM

Don’t ban it, just make them buy really expensive insurance. Somebody could take viagra and to that drive through. I’ve heard the warnings, man.

forest on April 2, 2013 at 3:34 PM

She needs a bikini top for that schnoz.

NoDonkey on April 2, 2013 at 3:22 PM

Lorein would ‘hit‘ it…

Seven Percent Solution on April 2, 2013 at 3:34 PM

Sure – just send HotAir a quarter every time you look at the site.

redguy on April 2, 2013 at 3:31 PM

You joke, but I’d gladly pay 5-10 bucks a month to make HA completely ad-free. I bet I’m not alone.

Good Solid B-Plus on April 2, 2013 at 3:40 PM

Bikinis?!?! Oh the horror…the horror! Thank God that new fangled style of swimming suits has yet to come to Arizona. Cause next thing you know they’ll be wearing them out in public at say the park, or public pools, or outdoor sporting events…

nextgen_repub on April 2, 2013 at 3:43 PM

Only beta males and ugly, fat, insecure women would have a problem with bikini baristas. Hell, even I’d go to get a peek. And I’m gay and don’t drink coffee. Do they have hot chocolate??? Heh heh.

GhoulAid on April 2, 2013 at 3:45 PM

Isn’t coffee an energy drink?

Mimzey on April 2, 2013 at 3:47 PM

NoDonkey on April 2, 2013 at 3:22 PM

Nice smile, easy to laugh, sense of humor.

And she’s gorgeous.

You must be related to the woman with the corncob up her rear end who started the anti-bikini cause.

cozmo on April 2, 2013 at 3:48 PM

True fact: in Victorian England, pit bulls were nicknamed nanny dogs — because they are great with kids. It’s only gangstas who abuse them that turns them into menaces.

rbj on April 2, 2013 at 3:48 PM

Hell, even I’d go to get a peek. And I’m gay and don’t drink coffee.

GhoulAid on April 2, 2013 at 3:45 PM

I would go just to pi$$ off the “nannies”.

HondaV65 on April 2, 2013 at 3:49 PM

I have a problem with bikini baristas. The bikinis are too damn large!

Archivarix on April 2, 2013 at 3:49 PM

rbj on April 2, 2013 at 3:48 PM

Not really.

cozmo on April 2, 2013 at 3:52 PM

O/T…

French ex-minister, a Socialist, admits lying about Swiss account to evade paying French taxes

France’s former budget minister Jérôme Cahuzac, who until two weeks ago was responsible for cracking down on tax evasion, admitted to having hidden funds in a secret Swiss bank. Judges have now placed Cahuzac under formal investigation.

France’s former budget minister Jérôme Cahuzac admitted on Tuesday that he had held a secret bank account abroad – a fact that he has strenuously denied until now.

His admission comes two weeks after he resigned from the government over allegations that he had siphoned funds into a UBS bank account in Switzerland in order to avoid paying taxes in France.

http://www.france24.com/en/20130402-ex-france-budget-minister-admits-lying-over-secret-swiss-account-cahuzac-hollande

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/france/9967585/Frances-former-tax-tsar-admits-having-undeclared-Swiss-bank-account.html

Resist We Much on April 2, 2013 at 3:53 PM

Sounds like someone didn’t like their husband getting coffee.

RDE2010 on April 2, 2013 at 3:55 PM

Nanny staters are the worse. The sad fact is the the right has their share as well – SoCons.

MoreLiberty on April 2, 2013 at 3:26 PM

I want and need more of your comments. It’s great when you read about liberal nanny-staters (Rep. Luis Arroyo (D-Chicago) I believe is who the article was about) and apply it to your own party in your dig of the day.

You commentary is absolutely essential to keep driving that wedge.

Thank you.

hawkdriver on April 2, 2013 at 3:59 PM

Not really.

cozmo on April 2, 2013 at 3:52 PM

Really

http://sgbrown.hubpages.com/hub/The-Pit-Bull-Dog-Once-Knows-as-the-Nanny-Dog-What-Happened

rbj on April 2, 2013 at 4:03 PM

Heck, I can remember high school girls wearing similar smiles washing cars to raise money for class trips way back in the 60′s.

fourdeucer on April 2, 2013 at 4:06 PM

anyone that says there should be a law against that should be sent to north korea.

unseen on April 2, 2013 at 4:10 PM

I suspect the underlying issue is that the big tips that result can’t be taxed properly.

exhelodrvr on April 2, 2013 at 4:10 PM

Isn’t coffee an energy drink?

Mimzey on April 2, 2013 at 3:47 PM

yeap first they came for the nocitine and they said nothing, then they went for the sugar and they said nothing, then they went for the salt and they said nothing, now they are coming for the caffine.

When will us adults tell the children to sit down and shut up.

unseen on April 2, 2013 at 4:12 PM

I suspect the underlying issue is that the big tips that result can’t be taxed properly.

exhelodrvr on April 2, 2013 at 4:10 PM

its unfair to the ugly ones serving coffee.

unseen on April 2, 2013 at 4:14 PM

Really

rbj on April 2, 2013 at 4:03 PM

This comes up every once in a while. The pro/con Pit bull lovers/haters have turned the whole thing into undecipherable noise.

Depending on which of the breeds, there is more than one, and fans of each claim theirs is the true nanny dog.

Newfoundland fans claim theirs is the true nanny dog too.

Just about any working dog from centuries gone by is equally deserving of the reputation. The dog was part of the family and even slept in the kid’s bed.

Besides, the Saint Bernard is the real nanny dog. Mine took care of me well into adulthood. Though he never learned to pour the brandy.

cozmo on April 2, 2013 at 4:21 PM

I’d be embarrassed to be in the bikini barista place — if only because people might think that’s the reason I went in there. But I’d rather just vote with my wallet, just as I don’t patronize strip joints.

bmmg39 on April 2, 2013 at 4:25 PM

Emphasizing the demeaning aspect of being put on display in this manner to the young women in the local area might also make the hiring costs steep enough to curtail the profit potential of bikini baristas.

Seriously? By what economic principle are these hiring costs going up? It the practice is demeaning, the girls won’t do it. Having them require a higher wage to do it only reminds me of an old joke, which I won’t share.

As for how demeaning it is to wear a bikini (I know, you just can’t find one on a beach these days), let me see, Debbie Do Right says, I can sell coffee in a golf shirt and barely make rent or I can sell coffee in a bikini and borrow a bucket to take my tips home.

Good luck with the morality campaign, Washington.

IndieDogg on April 2, 2013 at 4:26 PM

Thou shalt not serve coffee in a two piece swimsuit.

But killing a baby right after it’s born is perfectly okey-dokey.

/the radical left

UltimateBob on April 2, 2013 at 4:30 PM

She needs a bikini top for that schnoz.

NoDonkey on April 2, 2013 at 3:22 PM

Aw, come on. Nobody’s perfect.

She’s actually pretty cute.

UltimateBob on April 2, 2013 at 4:32 PM

Heck, I can remember high school girls wearing similar smiles washing cars to raise money for class trips way back in the 60′s.

fourdeucer on April 2, 2013 at 4:06 PM

they did it in the 80′s also. however and if you stopped to have your car wash today the NBC crew of tocatch a pedophile and the local liberals will be there filming. Sometimes I think our society takes itself too serious anymore.

unseen on April 2, 2013 at 4:37 PM

Thou shalt not serve coffee in a two piece swimsuit.

But killing a baby right after it’s born is perfectly okey-dokey.

/the radical left

UltimateBob on April 2, 2013 at 4:30 PM

I still say the first political party that comes up with a logical unifying stand for all issues will win 80% of the vote. It shouldn’t be too hard our founders did it.

unseen on April 2, 2013 at 4:39 PM

It’s only gangstas who abuse them that turns them into menaces.

rbj on April 2, 2013 at 3:48 PM

I wish that were true. I was “blessed” with a drop-off, about 4 years ago (that I thought was a Pitt but is probably a Staffie), and she is very loveable and sweet with me (50 something female) and my son. When she was just a big puppy, though, she started acting aggressive with my elderly cousin when he would visit. I had to stop her on two occasions. Now, at 4, she lives on a chain because she is violently aggressive with cats, other dogs, old people and children, especially, but pretty much anyone other than me or my son. I have never abused her or encouraged her to fight and I can only assume that she was bred for the trait.
I hate that she lives on a chain and I would happily give her up to someone who has the environment that she needs (she is way beyond my knowledge/ability to “fix” her) but I won’t run an ad because I don’t want her to go to someone who might fight her.

jffree1 on April 2, 2013 at 4:43 PM

I voted the dog banning.

I can’t believe so many voted for the bikini option. You are all out of touch!

Dusty on April 2, 2013 at 4:43 PM

Resist We Much on April 2, 2013 at 3:53 PM

I believe Jérôme Cahuzac is French for Tim Geithner.

Aviator on April 2, 2013 at 4:50 PM

Really

http://sgbrown.hubpages.com/hub/The-Pit-Bull-Dog-Once-Knows-as-the-Nanny-Dog-What-Happened

[rbj on April 2, 2013 at 4:03 PM]

Any dog that could put up with the Little Rascals has my vote for nanny dog, even though I’m partial to German Shepherds.

Anyway, thanks for the link.

Dusty on April 2, 2013 at 4:50 PM

One of those bikini baristas opened near me not too long ago. Went out of business in about 3 months. Sexy idea, but just not a good business model, IMHO.

redshirt on April 2, 2013 at 4:51 PM

Do the bikini baristas sell milk shakes??

…not that I’d ever order one…

…at a time!

landlines on April 2, 2013 at 4:58 PM

Can you PLEASE get rid of the expedia ads that play automatically on landing with no way to stop them until several seconds into the video? On my home computer it isn’t a problem, those are blocked, but it makes visiting your site on my work computer an issue. I can’t install ad blocker software on the work computer.

crosspatch on April 2, 2013 at 3:26 PM

Don’t use Microsoft IE. Install Firefox with AdBlock. Voila! No ads!

kooly on April 2, 2013 at 4:59 PM

Dusty on April 2, 2013 at 4:43 PM I also voted for the dog banning.
Punish the deed-not the breed!

annoyinglittletwerp on April 2, 2013 at 5:16 PM

Seriously? By what economic principle are these hiring costs going up? It the practice is demeaning, the girls won’t do it. Having them require a higher wage to do it only reminds me of an old joke, which I won’t share.

IndieDogg on April 2, 2013 at 4:26 PM

If you won’t share it, I will.

“Madam, would you sleep with me for a million dollars?”

“Yes, I think I would.”

“Madam, would you sleep with me for a dollar?”

“No! What kind of woman do you think I am?”

“I’ve already determined that. Now I’m just haggling.”

gryphon202 on April 2, 2013 at 5:18 PM

What is up with Reason? These are local ordinances.

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.

We should encourage these types of issues to be handled at the local level. THAT’S WHERE they belong. They do not belong at the Federal level.

I’m really beginning to wonder about the folks at Reason sometimes.

Saltysam on April 2, 2013 at 6:53 PM

IMHO, one of the ironies about Washington state’s bikini barista-gate scandal is that many of us guys don’t even find these naked women particularly….um, “attractive”. The fact is, the sun almost never shines here in the Puget Sound region, and with the perpetual overcast skies, it’s like living deep inside a cave — maybe a mile or two below the surface of the planet. The net result is that the caucasian women here have the pallor of a zombie — you know, like the ones that AllahPundit is so fond of watching on “Walking Dead”. What do you think, collie?

My collie says:

Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout
is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.
—Proverbs 11:22 (NIV)

Well said collie. Here’s a treat.

CyberCipher on April 2, 2013 at 7:04 PM

Saltysam on April 2, 2013 at 6:53 PM

They’re still nanny laws, and should be fought. But, you’re right that it’s at least not a federal law.

GWB on April 2, 2013 at 7:06 PM

I’m really beginning to wonder about the folks at Reason sometimes.

Saltysam on April 2, 2013 at 6:53 PM

Had this discussion earlier. I guess a real libertarian doesn’t believe a state has a right to make law let alone a city ordinances.

hawkdriver on April 2, 2013 at 7:09 PM

They’re still nanny laws, and should be fought. But, you’re right that it’s at least not a federal law.

GWB on April 2, 2013 at 7:06 PM

They are nanny laws. Agreed.

Should be fought?

As far as I’m concerned, if I’m not part of that community, then I keep my friggin nose out of it.

That’s my point.

What do you suggest, taking the case all the way to the Supreme Court? Kind of blows a big fat hole in the idea behind the 10th amendment, doesn’t it?

Saltysam on April 2, 2013 at 7:13 PM

I’m really beginning to wonder about the folks at Reason sometimes.

Saltysam on April 2, 2013 at 6:53 PM

I’ve thought that for a while.

hawkdriver on April 2, 2013 at 7:09 PM

Please, do not lump all libertarians together.

Reason is capital “L” hard core insular libertarian.

cozmo on April 2, 2013 at 7:17 PM

Had this discussion earlier. I guess a real libertarian doesn’t believe a state has a right to make law let alone a city ordinances.

hawkdriver on April 2, 2013 at 7:09 PM

There are times, this is one of them, when I feel more faithful to libertarian principles than libertarians.

Saltysam on April 2, 2013 at 7:17 PM

Don’t know about the bikinis but those people against it in vid need to nanny some paper bags o’er their gross faces.

Sherman1864 on April 2, 2013 at 7:33 PM

Brings to mind a passage from Robert Heinlein:

“The human race divides politically into those who want people to be controlled and those who have no such desire. The former are idealists acting from highest motives for the greatest good of the greatest number. The latter are surly curmudgeons, suspicious and lacking in altruism. But they are more comfortable neighbors than the other sort.”

I’ll take a surly curmudgeon any day.

LooseCannon on April 2, 2013 at 7:38 PM

hawkdriver on April 2, 2013 at 7:09 PM
Please, do not lump all libertarians together.

Reason is capital “L” hard core insular libertarian.

cozmo on April 2, 2013 at 7:17 PM

You know me. But you have my apology anyway if you really were offended.

hawkdriver on April 2, 2013 at 7:52 PM

hawkdriver on April 2, 2013 at 7:52 PM

You know me, I don’t easily offend.

I just wanted to make sure that not all libertarians get lumped together.

cozmo on April 2, 2013 at 7:55 PM

Don’t know about the bikinis but those people against it in vid need to nanny some paper bags o’er their gross faces.

Sherman1864 on April 2, 2013 at 7:33 PM

Looks have a bearing on whether someone should speak their mind or not.

The mother was actually speaking specifically about the “lack” of a bikini top and just pasties. If that was able to be publicly viewed, I’d be against it too.

hawkdriver on April 2, 2013 at 7:56 PM

hawkdriver on April 2, 2013 at 7:52 PM
You know me, I don’t easily offend.

I just wanted to make sure that not all libertarians get lumped together.

cozmo on April 2, 2013 at 7:55 PM

Then no, of course. Like anyone else libertarians aren’t monolithic.

hawkdriver on April 2, 2013 at 7:58 PM

Did I trigger a filter?

My post seems to have been lost.
Redux.

What if the coffee shop was at the beach? Are there no Hooter’s restaurants in that Washington town?

The dog ban is sheer political idiocy. The same mind set that would ban scary lookin’ guns.
Maybe they could ban hi-cap jaws and limit pit bulls to seven teeth.

And let’s stop our kids from drinking Monsters, while we pump ‘em full of Rit@lin and 4dder@ll.

soundingboard on April 2, 2013 at 9:31 PM

What is up with Reason? These are local ordinances.

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.

We should encourage these types of issues to be handled at the local level. THAT’S WHERE they belong. They do not belong at the Federal level.

I’m really beginning to wonder about the folks at Reason sometimes.

Saltysam on April 2, 2013 at 6:53 PM

I’m surprised that no one seems to agree with you.

The whole bikini thing comes directly under the heading of local autonomy. Any community has the right to set standards of decency.

Breed-specific laws against dogs are stupid, though. Dogs are animals. An owner can make any dog mean. Pit bulls have great dispositions, and make great pets. The real problem are people who want a big, tough dog with a bad reputation, and make sure that the dog is never allowed to be friendly with anyone or be petted or fed by anyone because they don’t want anyone “spoiling” their dog.

You don’t have to try to turn a dog into an attack dog. Most dogs are loyal enough to their owners to defend them in a crisis situation, without being turned into “killers.”

There Goes The Neighborhood on April 3, 2013 at 1:15 AM

It takes low information people to represent a low information electorate.

Welcome to Barack Obama’s America, in all it’s glory.

MNHawk on April 3, 2013 at 9:26 AM

Use to be a guy on Rt 9… He had a hot-dog truck… His wife I think it was would sit on a lawn chair and sunbath… The line was longer on those days. I don’t know if anyone ever complained but he and she were there for years… May still be.

Gotta love entrepreneurs!

RalphyBoy on April 3, 2013 at 12:51 PM

In fairness, a lot of the kerfuffle over the bikini barista isn’t the bikini part, but the fact that “bikini” is being loosely translated to mean “negligee” and “pasties” and “installing a stripper pole in the drive thru”.

If the libertarians want to make a case about civil governments categorizing adult businesses, that’s fine. But if we’re being honest about what’s taking place in some of these brewhouses, then have them licensed as an adult business and then have the debate about what is the appropriate role. Either that or tell them to stop poisoning the debate about bikini huts by wearing not-bikinis.

The Schaef on April 3, 2013 at 3:12 PM