Andrew and the giant rabbit

posted at 3:01 pm on March 31, 2013 by Jazz Shaw

By now I’m sure many of you are settled in with whichever Easter traditions you observe, but if you’re still browsing around for something to read, I’m going to offer up one suggestion which is a favorite of mine. Long time friend of Hot Air, Andrew Malcolm, has once again published a popular and endearing Easter column of his which tells a story from a different era. Particularly for those of you who’ve never read it, please take the time to read it in full. It’s Andrew’s own recounting of his time in Guam just when South Vietnam was falling. He was assigned to greet some new arrivals who were coming to America and found himself explaining a few American customs to the immigrants who were unfamiliar with our culture. One of those was the Easter tradition involving colored eggs and rabbits. The results are memorable. Here’s just a taste to get you started.

What kind of eggs are these Easter eggs? Bird eggs? Snake eggs?

No, no, chicken eggs. The audience nodded. Chicken eggs they knew. A good sign.

Well, just before Easter, I said, parents buy a whole bunch of these chicken eggs, hardboil them and then color and decorate them.

Why?

Well, it’s tradition. They look pretty. He translated. The crowd was slightly puzzled.

Do you eat them?

No. Well, not right then.

What do you do with these colored chicken eggs?

Well, at night the parents and grandparents hide all the chicken eggs around the house.

Translation. OK, no sense there. But Americans are a strange people.

And then in the morning, I said, the parents tell the children that a large rabbit had sneaked into the house during the night and hidden all the chicken eggs.

Tran stared at me.

A large rabbit?

Yes, a large rabbit. The Easter bunny.

He repeated that in Vietnamese. Dead silence descended. The children looked worried. No one spoke. Everyone stared. At me.

You’ll have to read the rest for yourself. Trust me… it’s worth it.


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Describing this without saying why these are symbols would be almost as problematic as descrbing a communion. (“So yeah, we eat the flesh and drink the blood of Jesus and, hey, come back here!”)

apostic on March 31, 2013 at 3:09 PM

And now you know why we have the 2nd Amendment: To defend our lives, liberty, and property from the giant invisible rabbits who invade our homes in the middle of the night before the Sunday after the first full moon following the vernal equinox.

/kidding

JimLennon on March 31, 2013 at 3:12 PM

And now you know why we have the 2nd Amendment: To defend our lives, liberty, and property from the giant invisible rabbits….

JimLennon on March 31, 2013 at 3:12 PM

Elwood P. Dowd could not be reached for comment.

apostic on March 31, 2013 at 3:19 PM

All you have to do is let them experience it once. Kids love finding things. Parents love when their kids are happy. Same applies to Halloween.

Blake on March 31, 2013 at 3:22 PM

Thanks for posting it here, Jazz. I read it already, and it is classic Andrew Malcolm.

simkeith on March 31, 2013 at 3:32 PM

Nice story … *sniff*

Dusty on March 31, 2013 at 3:42 PM

Very funny.

rbj on March 31, 2013 at 5:06 PM

I LOL’d. Thanks, Ed.

PatriotGal2257 on March 31, 2013 at 6:05 PM

Pity he didn’t know the real stories behind the eggs and the rabbits.

Knott Buyinit on March 31, 2013 at 6:32 PM

Have you ever tried to describe to a Sears clerk the bust size of several Asian women you’d seen one time?

…Jazz!…you devil you!

KOOLAID2 on March 31, 2013 at 6:51 PM

Describing this without saying why these are symbols would be almost as problematic as descrbing a communion. (“So yeah, we eat the flesh and drink the blood of Jesus and, hey, come back here!”)

apostic on March 31, 2013 at 3:09 PM

First century Christians were accused of cannibalism and incest for the Eucharist and “love feasts” among the brothers and sisters.

davidk on March 31, 2013 at 7:54 PM