Blogger horrified to realize that Burger King’s new bacon sundae is lookin’ pretty good to him

posted at 9:00 pm on April 13, 2012 by Allahpundit

I know what you’re thinking. “If you were jazzed about the bacon milkshake, why wouldn’t you be double jazzed for a big gloppy mess of ice cream and fudge and … pork?” Well, go back and look at the milkshake. No real bacon there, just bacon syrup, fully incorporated and thus perfectly texturally consistent with the rest of the drink. Now go look at this nightmare. It’s a lumpy sea of sickening sweetness — and right there, jutting ominously into the sky like a savory iceberg, is an honest to goodness piece of crispy pig flesh. Nothing goes better with milk and sugar than salted animal fat, right? C’mon. Can’t be good.

Or can it?

I decided to first tackle the large piece of bacon that was stuck in as a counterpoint to the peak of gleaming white soft-serve goodness; this seemed like the best way to get a good feel for the bacon and then slowly dip my toe into the rest of it. The bacon was at room temperature, but was crispy and thick. Fast food bacon generally disappoints me, but this version was definitely not bad: crunchy, smoky, and salty. So sturdy was this piece of bacon that I was easily able to dip the end of it into the cup as I ate it, scooping up the vanilla soft serve and the chocolate and caramel toppings…

All in all, the BK Bacon Sundae was everything that I had hoped it would be, and nothing that I had feared: the bacon stayed crispy throughout, and its smokiness and saltiness powered through even when there was a lot of chocolate and caramel on the spoon. It had the crispy-crunchiness and the ever-so-slight burned flavor that bacon gets as soon as it crosses the border into well-done – but in this application, I believe that is exactly where it needed to be. Even on a few of the pieces that looked fattier than some of the others, there was no awkward chewiness or off-tasting flavor of un-rendered pork fat. I am pleasantly surprised to get to say that it is definitely something I would order again…

Food rating: 8.5 out of 10. And if you follow the last link, you’ll see that it looks much better in the new photos. Nothing lumpy or runny this time. Just cool, creamy dairy deliciousness generously garnished with swine. For freak-show food, it seems downright wholesome, quite unlike this monstrosity cooked up by the sick minds at Pizza Hut UK. Good lord. I know British food is supposed to be terrible but have some dignity, please.

The sundae’s only available in Nashville right now so one of the HA faithful will have to swing by to sample it for the rest of us. Who’s my volunteer?


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Coward that one. Best part of him went down his …………………..

Bmore on April 13, 2012 at 11:29 PM

It’s just a troll that crawled out from under it’s bridge. Ignore it and it’ll go away. Don’t feed it, especially don’t feed it bacon.

Oldnuke on April 13, 2012 at 11:33 PM

Sounds good to me. I like food threads in general because I like to cook. Just bought the stuff today to make lasagna that’s on for this weekend and to top it off I think I’ll whip up a batch of pecan sticky buns.

Oldnuke on April 13, 2012 at 11:31 PM

Unfortunately, I’m trying to keep my weight down. But a patch of pecan sticky buns and lasagna sounds very good to me. Enjoy!

Gladtobehere on April 13, 2012 at 11:35 PM

Coward that one. Best part of him went down his …………………..

Bmore on April 13, 2012 at 11:29 PM

He’s precious. One of God’s critters—-e-coli.

arnold ziffel on April 13, 2012 at 11:38 PM

Oldnuke on April 13, 2012 at 11:33 PM

LOL! See there is that touch of temper. Little cowards come in pee on the carpet, puke on the sofa and leave. You’re right he won’t last. They like to say things they would never say to my face. I’ll guarantee that.

Bmore on April 13, 2012 at 11:38 PM

Back to QOTD. Lot of reading Allah makes me do over there.

Bmore on April 13, 2012 at 11:39 PM

I love ice cream and if anyone is traveling near Bakersfield, CA, you should make a stop at Moo Cafe for some bacon ice cream. Yes, it sounded weird to me at first, but once tried, its simply delicious.

riddick on April 13, 2012 at 11:41 PM

This has been a fun thread. For further information refer to:

http://www.southparkstudios.com/full-episodes/s14e14-creme-fraiche

and yourmommalovesme, please share some of your favorite fried turd recipes.

arnold ziffel on April 13, 2012 at 11:43 PM

I love ice cream and if anyone is traveling near Bakersfield, CA, you should make a stop at Moo Cafe for some bacon ice cream. Yes, it sounded weird to me at first, but once tried, its simply delicious.

riddick on April 13, 2012 at 11:41 PM

Stay away, that is the worst place to go to. Town is just awful. :)

arnold ziffel on April 13, 2012 at 11:45 PM

Is that what you use to seduce all those progressive women you told us about a few weeks ago? (it was you, right?)

FLconservative on April 13, 2012 at 10:11 PM

No, it wasn’t me. But, the only things that one could use to seduce progressive women is money, honey, and wine. And, maybe a little coke or crack on the side. The girls I like go for beer or champagne, or both, have a brain, and maybe a subtle tatoo or two, and who want to do more than walk on a beach. ;-)

TXUS on April 14, 2012 at 12:11 AM

Okay, imagine this:

You have a BLT and a milk shake. Take a bite of the BLT and wash it down with the milk shake. Bingo. No big deal. The sundae should be pretty good. The bacon milkshake, not so much.

princetrumpet on April 14, 2012 at 12:23 AM

TXUS on April 14, 2012 at 12:11 AM

Sorry. But sounds like you have a good prog-radar going, but no tequila?. Is there another TXsomething? His comment about bedding progressive women was priceless. Thanks for responding.

FLconservative on April 14, 2012 at 12:26 AM

The sundae’s only available in Nashville right now so

This looks like something the kids could try at home without danger. Ice cream in freezer, syrup in fridge as is the bacon that merely needs frying.

BL@KBIRD on April 14, 2012 at 12:50 AM

Makes me think about opening a can of pork soda, drinking some swine…

Thats from an old Primus song (and album) called, Pork Soda.

I’m being a bit facetious anyway. I like my bacon, but not with ice cream… and I say this as someone who went along with the frosty/milkshake and fries thing a la Wendy’s.

Logus on April 14, 2012 at 12:54 AM

Must be a slow news day for the Porky the Pig crowd.

DevilsPrinciple on April 14, 2012 at 7:25 AM

The sundae’s only available in Nashville right now

O_o

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Why’d you put that at the end?! I was totally planning on going to Burger King tonight to have one!

englishqueen01 on April 14, 2012 at 10:21 AM

*hand on heart* God bless this great nation.

captn2fat on April 14, 2012 at 10:48 AM

Where’s the blogfather? As Glen says: “Everything goes better with bacon!”

aritai on April 14, 2012 at 12:47 PM

Disgusting. And I’m not just talking about the thought of eating this McTurd.

This restaurant chain is preying on obese people that are addicted to the taste of fat, sugar and salt…
Well, as long as it’s not illegal it must be moral!

AlexB on April 14, 2012 at 1:05 PM

..the bacon stayed crispy throughout, and its smokiness and saltiness powered through even when there was a lot of chocolate and caramel on the spoon. It had the crispy-crunchiness and the ever-so-slight burned flavor that bacon gets as soon as it crosses the border into well-done – ..

This actually sounds better than sex !!

Now to find a “thug free” Burger King in my neighborhood ! BigSven needs one of these !

BigSven on April 14, 2012 at 1:25 PM

AlexB on April 14, 2012 at 1:05 PM

Call us when people are being mandated to eat this or anything else. Please stop saving us from ourselves.

Cindy Munford on April 14, 2012 at 3:25 PM

pecan sticky buns.

Oldnuke on April 13, 2012 at 11:31 PM

Recipe please!

WeekendAtBernankes on April 14, 2012 at 4:21 PM

Again, try the new BK fries, same kind of approach and their arguably better, believe it or not.

TXUS on April 13, 2012 at 9:47 PM

Okay I’m going to investigate this and the bacon sundae in a little bit here. Will report back with my findings.

WeekendAtBernankes on April 14, 2012 at 4:25 PM

Oh BTW, can’t mention food without mentioning that MB is a dick:

New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg said that he would select a peanut butter, banana and bacon sandwich [an "Elvis"] as his “last meal,” using toasted Wonder Bread, melted Skippy Super Chunky, banana slices, and bacon.

WeekendAtBernankes on April 14, 2012 at 4:26 PM

I had one yesterday and echo Allah’s sentiment… surprisingly good throughout.

notunderabushel on April 14, 2012 at 4:36 PM

My BK unforch did not have the bacon sundae.

As per TXUS comment, the new fries could be argued to be better but I’m going to have to argue that they are not. They’re bigger and more dense than McDizzle’s fries, and don’t get limp when they aren’t fresh, but the taste just doesn’t quite hold up. I think it’s the oil.

They were still good but I’m going to have to go with McD’s followed by Wendy’s for fries.

WeekendAtBernankes on April 14, 2012 at 8:22 PM

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