Coming soon: the USS Britney Spears?

posted at 9:15 am on March 13, 2012 by Ed Morrissey

That’s an exaggeration, but not by much.  The famed aircraft carrier USS Enterprise departed Sunday on its final deployment, the 22nd of its amazing career of more than 50 years.  Later this year, the Big E will return home to be decommissioned.  The US Navy has a new carrier in the works, designated CVN-80 but as yet unnamed (Enterprise is CVN-65, for those keeping score).  Given the odd decisions on naming naval ships, Mark Krikorian has begun circulating a petition to transfer the name Enterprise to CVN-80 — or find a more appropriate name than limited imaginations have suggested of late:

But after this year the U.S. Navy will no longer have an Enterprise, which is why there’s a petition to name the next planned carrier, CVN-80, the USS Enterprise. Sign it, because we’ve gotten into the habit of naming our greatest warships after politicians, and not even dead ones — one of the newest carriers is the USS George H. W. Bush. Look, I voted for the guy, and he was a whole lot better than the current occupant, but nothing named by the U.S. government — not a building, not a scholarship program, certainly not one of the greatest warships built by mankind — should be named after a living person. Except for posthumous Medal of Honor recipients, it seems to me you should be dead for 50 years, preferably 100, before your name is even eligible to be considered for a naval ship.

And while we’re naming ships after Jimmy Carter and John Murtha and Bob Hope, keep in mind there’s no USS Lexington or Yorktown or Saratoga or Midway or Khe Sanh or, if we want to name them after people, Benjamin Franklin or John Adams or Jefferson or Madison or Monroe or Jackson. There have been nearly 1,000 Marine and Navy combat deaths in Iraq and Afghanistan — any one of those is more appropriate as the name of a ship than the USS Gabrielle Giffords.

I recall when the first Space Shuttle was built, and Star Trek fans wanted it named Enterprise.  They succeeded, but the joke ended up being on them (well, us); the Enterprise was a test vehicle that never flew in space.

At least that name made sense, however.  It hearkened back to naval days when ships took names that represented the values of the nation that launched them — Enterprise, Intrepid, Reliant, to name a few from American and British tradition, or that honored famous military victories like Yorktown and Saratoga, as Krikorian suggests.  We named nuclear submarines after the states, which might be a little more prosaic given their funding, but at least they represented the people as a whole rather than a living politician.  Even in Star Trek, the shuttles always took the names of famous explorers or those who had died in the effort to reach into space, such as Ellison Onizuka, Gus Grissom, and Christa McAuliffe.  There wasn’t a shuttle named Jean-Luc Picard in ST:TNG.  Instead, the naming conventions of the past several years seem to express the notion that values and history matter less than self-celebration.

Let’s name CVN-80 Enterprise and continue a tradition of audacity and excellence in the carrier fleet.  But even more to the point, let’s return to a tradition of honoring the values and history of this country in the naming of our naval ships.  Stop the madness before we christen a new ship the USS Britney Spears and we all have to say, “Oops! They did it again.”

Update: The last line in the penultimate paragraph should have read “matter less” rather than “matter more.”  I’ve fixed it, thanks to Twitter follower Bcwlk.

Breaking on Hot Air

Blowback

Note from Hot Air management: This section is for comments from Hot Air's community of registered readers. Please don't assume that Hot Air management agrees with or otherwise endorses any particular comment just because we let it stand. A reminder: Anyone who fails to comply with our terms of use may lose their posting privilege.

Trackbacks/Pings

Trackback URL

Comments

Comment pages: 1 2 3

USS Sandra Fluke

Free Indeed on March 13, 2012 at 9:18 AM

The next super-carrier we build must be called the USS Sarah Palin.

CorporatePiggy on March 13, 2012 at 9:19 AM

If Brittany Spears could only be shot in the head…No never mind. We already have a ship named after that.

rich801 on March 13, 2012 at 9:20 AM

USS Sandra Fluke

Free Indeed on March 13, 2012 at 9:18 AM

That one has good berth control.

philoquin on March 13, 2012 at 9:21 AM

I like USS Sandra Fluke. That way, when we say that many men have been aboard Sandra Fluke, we’ll only be half serious.

JoeShmoe99 on March 13, 2012 at 9:22 AM

Free Indeed on March 13, 2012 at 9:18 AM

Thread winner!

Pqlyur1 on March 13, 2012 at 9:22 AM

Naming a ship after Gabby Giffords is idiotic. What brave thing did she do? She got shot in the head and she survived. OK. I’m happy for her. So? This means she’s a hero? Please. It’s pathetic.

JoeShmoe99 on March 13, 2012 at 9:23 AM

Are the big guns silicone ?

viking01 on March 13, 2012 at 9:23 AM

Hell, I’m surprised that Obama isn’t selling naming rights or, more precisely, making a not-so-apparent quid pro quo exchange with his biggest donors.

“Clinton was a chump. He only had the Lincoln Bedroom. I’m from Chicago. Let me show you how it’s done.” – President Barack Obama

Resist We Much on March 13, 2012 at 9:24 AM

That one has good berth control.

philoquin on March 13, 2012 at 9:21 AM

Classic!!

Free Indeed on March 13, 2012 at 9:25 AM

Oh, come on. You know they’re going to name it the USS Barack Obama if he’s re-elected.

Wethal on March 13, 2012 at 9:26 AM

USS Pete Mitchell?

After all “Maverick” served on the Big E. //

Rolling over the name of CVN-65 to CVN-80 is a pretty sound suggestion. It has been done in the past. A long line of good ships, too.

coldwarrior on March 13, 2012 at 9:27 AM

. I’m from Chicago. Let me show you how it’s done. Here is our new cruiser the USS Barney Frank.

Fear that, folks.

Resist We Much on March 13, 2012 at 9:24 AM

CorporatePiggy on March 13, 2012 at 9:28 AM

USS 9/11

M240H on March 13, 2012 at 9:28 AM

ships took names that represented the values of the nation that launched them

Hmmm, what would today’s version be? USS Grifter? USS Moocher? USS Entitlements? USS Trillion Dollar Deficits?

AZCoyote on March 13, 2012 at 9:29 AM

We named nuclear submarines after the states, which might be a little more prosaic given their funding,

That naming of the Ohio-class ballistic missile (some now giant Tomahawk guided-missle/SEAL delivery) subs after states actually carried on the tradition of naming the most-powerful capital ships after states when the battleships were retired. I believe the reference you’re seeking is the naming of the Los Angeles class of attack submarines after cities (previously reserved for support ships), done so by Admiral Hyman Rickover to ensure Congressional funding.

Steve Eggleston on March 13, 2012 at 9:30 AM

That one has good berth control.

philoquin on March 13, 2012 at 9:21 AM

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Turtle317 on March 13, 2012 at 9:30 AM

The famed aircraft carrier USS Enterprise departed Sunday on its final deployment, the 22nd of its amazing career of more than 50 years.

The Enterprise is famous for being nuclear and its high speed run to blockade Cuba. The famous Enterprise is the one that preceded it, CV-6.

CVN-80 should be named Enterprise for the sake of tradition started with sloops and schooners be for the US became a country.

I agree with the way names are getting screwed up. The gator navy seems to be getting it right though.

cozmo on March 13, 2012 at 9:30 AM

AZCoyote on March 13, 2012 at 9:29 AM

USS WTH?
USS WTF?
USS OMFG?
USS LOLZ.

CorporatePiggy on March 13, 2012 at 9:31 AM

How about the USS Maklin. “Pacific rim, we’re kicking ass.” :-)

Seriously, the Enterprise, Yorktown, Emancipation, lots of good names.

The_Livewire on March 13, 2012 at 9:31 AM

CorporatePiggy on March 13, 2012 at 9:28 AM

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!

Resist We Much on March 13, 2012 at 9:32 AM

Wait, so is no one actually considering naming an aircraft carrier USS Britney Spears? Jeeze, Ed…..

Dongemaharu on March 13, 2012 at 9:33 AM

Steve Eggleston on March 13, 2012 at 9:30 AM

Attack submarines switched to state names with the follow on to the Seawolf class, the Virginia class. Between battleships and SSBN’s being named after states was reserved for CGN’s.

cozmo on March 13, 2012 at 9:33 AM

The USS Pay for My Abortion.

Akzed on March 13, 2012 at 9:33 AM

USS Sandra Fluke

Free Indeed on March 13, 2012 at 9:18 AM

That one has good berth control.

philoquin on March 13, 2012 at 9:21 AM

And because it will be full of seamen?

shaner5000 on March 13, 2012 at 9:33 AM

The dems will pick an anti war idiot

cmsinaz on March 13, 2012 at 9:34 AM

Khe Sanh
========

The seige,nasty to boot!!

canopfor on March 13, 2012 at 9:34 AM

The USS SarahCuda Attack Submarine!

canopfor on March 13, 2012 at 9:35 AM

No doubt wethal

cmsinaz on March 13, 2012 at 9:35 AM

I think your naming ships after politicians is correct wait 50 years. I would like to carry on that idea that the same rule be applied to all federal projects. There is way to much of these federeal projects floating around without naming after every politician.

Release on March 13, 2012 at 9:35 AM

I expect it will be named USS Baraka Obama.

ButterflyDragon on March 13, 2012 at 9:36 AM

Attack submarines switched to state names with the follow on to the Seawolf class, the Virginia class. Between battleships and SSBN’s being named after states was reserved for CGN’s.

cozmo on March 13, 2012 at 9:33 AM

Thanks.

Steve Eggleston on March 13, 2012 at 9:36 AM

We already have the USS John Murtha, and the USS Cesar Chavez.

The only one they’ve missed is the USS Saul Alinsky.

Wethal on March 13, 2012 at 9:37 AM

USS Sandra Fluke

Free Indeed on March 13, 2012 at 9:18 AM

That one has good berth control.

philoquin on March 13, 2012 at 9:21 AM

… and lots of hands “on deck.”

viking01 on March 13, 2012 at 9:37 AM

Are the big guns silicone ?

viking01 on March 13, 2012 at 9:23 AM

USS Sandra Fluke

Free Indeed on March 13, 2012 at 9:18 AM

That one has good berth control.

philoquin on March 13, 2012 at 9:21 AM
End the thread. We have a winner!

Clink on March 13, 2012 at 9:23 AM

Shut the thread down! Shut the thread down! Anti-climatic posts after these! (just put giant condoms over the guns!)

KOOLAID2 on March 13, 2012 at 9:37 AM

Khe Sanh
========

The seige,nasty to boot!!

canopfor on March 13, 2012 at 9:34 AM

I agree.

It was too soon to name a ship after that and they switched it to Peleliu.

Careful going there though, with this administration there could be a My Lia or Abu Ghraib.

cozmo on March 13, 2012 at 9:40 AM

Name it after the first captain of the original Enterprise and hope for another 50 years. And no I’m not talking about Capt. Pike.

multiuseless on March 13, 2012 at 9:40 AM

USS Sandra Fluke

Free Indeed on March 13, 2012 at 9:18 AM

A slut in every port.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I’m sorry. :(

Shy Guy on March 13, 2012 at 9:40 AM

Heres every US Ship A to Z!!
—————————-

NavSource Naval History
Photographic History of the U.S. Navy
*************************************

Battleships
Aircraft Carriers
Escort Carriers
Cruisers
Destroyers
Destroyers Escorts & Frigates
Littoral Warfare Vessels
Submarines
Auxiliaries & Service Vessels
Military Sealift Command
Amphibious
Mine Warfare
Patrol Vessels
Yard & District Craft
Civilian Vessels (ID & SP)
Old Navy – Steam & Sail
Rigid Airships
Special Photo Features
=======================

http://www.navsource.org/

canopfor on March 13, 2012 at 9:40 AM

I still think the USS Gabby Giffords was used for political reasons, in that if they ever try to cut the number of carriers, the people who cut out the later ones sequentially will be known as killing the USS Gabby Giffords and if they try to cut it nonsequentially they will be accused of politics just to keep the USS Gabby Giffords as one of the remaining ships. I think it is insurance for budget cuts.

LevStrauss on March 13, 2012 at 9:41 AM

Let’s name CVN-80 Enterprise and continue a tradition of audacity and excellence in the carrier fleet.

The USS Audacity (of Hope).

Odysseus on March 13, 2012 at 9:42 AM

USS Shanksville

dddave on March 13, 2012 at 9:45 AM

Brittany,what for the ballast?

docflash on March 13, 2012 at 9:45 AM

canopfor on March 13, 2012 at 9:40 AM

Its a good source and lets you know just how far back the named of a ship Enterprise goes.

They left one out though, the first airship in the US inventory was named Enterprise. Look it up, Civil War observation craft Enterprise. It even sent the first electronic message from air to ground.

cozmo on March 13, 2012 at 9:46 AM

USS Sandra Fluke

Free Indeed on March 13, 2012 at 9:18 AM

That one has good berth control.

philoquin on March 13, 2012 at 9:21 AM

you should be given a stern warning for that joke. But still, I bow to the master.

CatchAll on March 13, 2012 at 9:46 AM

USS KickYerAss

search4truth on March 13, 2012 at 9:49 AM

I agree.

Random on March 13, 2012 at 9:51 AM

you should be given a stern warning for that joke. But still, I bow to the master.

CatchAll on March 13, 2012 at 9:46 AM

I keel you.

Shy Guy on March 13, 2012 at 9:51 AM

She’s got big bombs and is a one woman wrecking crew, so the idea is not that crazy.

swamp_yankee on March 13, 2012 at 9:53 AM

Jeezz…I hate these names. We have lost something.

USS Lost Manhood

Oil Can on March 13, 2012 at 9:53 AM

I’ll forgo an AC/DC lyric.

viking01 on March 13, 2012 at 9:54 AM

Thanks for posting this. I signed the petition to name the new ship Enterprise. The current Enterprise served extremely honorably, especially in WWII. She deserves to have a namesake.

And, no…this doesn’t have anything to do with Star Trek (although that is really cool). The Enterprise on Star Trek, like the Reliant and Intrepid on Star Trek took their names from naval tradition, just as the real-life Enterprise did.

DRayRaven on March 13, 2012 at 9:55 AM

USS Lexington (16) was named the same year or year after the USS Lexington(2) was sunk in WWII. Why not name 80 the Enterprise.

I do agree that naming anything after a politician that is not even dead is beyond pathetic. So much for selfless civil service.

matthew26 on March 13, 2012 at 9:56 AM

USS Threesome?

Seems to be the way the culture is going.

Random on March 13, 2012 at 9:57 AM

Once they named the Jimmy Carter it was all over. Seriously, where is a name like that going to inspire fear and respect in an enemy? Most names are like that, living and dead politicians – it just looks comical. You can almost hear the bad guys laughing.

With one singular exception, the REAGAN

Unlike the other names, THAT one seems to fairly ooze righteous power and impending doom.

Now why is that, I wonder …

Cricket624 on March 13, 2012 at 9:57 AM

canopfor on March 13, 2012 at 9:34 AM
I agree.

It was too soon to name a ship after that and they switched it to Peleliu.

Careful going there though, with this administration there could be a My Lia or Abu Ghraib.

cozmo on March 13, 2012 at 9:40 AM

cozmo:Good point!:)

canopfor on March 13, 2012 at 9:59 AM

you should be given a stern warning for that joke. But still, I bow to the master.

CatchAll on March 13, 2012 at 9:46 AM
————————————-

I keel you.

Shy Guy on March 13, 2012 at 9:51 AM

Shy Guy:(sarc!:)

**************** S-I-L-E-N-C-E **********************

canopfor on March 13, 2012 at 10:01 AM

I like USS Sandra Fluke. That way, when we say that many men have been aboard Sandra Fluke, we’ll only be half serious.

JoeShmoe99 on March 13, 2012 at 9:22 AM

Or sea men?

mechkiller_k on March 13, 2012 at 10:02 AM

USS WE WEEDED UP

USS Fundamentally Transformational America!!
(sarc)

canopfor on March 13, 2012 at 10:03 AM

Here is an idea, let’s name the next carrier after the most famous ship in the U.S. inventory.

CVN-80 the USS Constitution, because we need to remember it now before it’s gone forever.

BTW, I know that the USS Constitution is still an active ship, Old Ironsides is still alive and well in Boston Harbor. I was on her just last spring as a chaperone for my daughters 8th grade feild trip to Beantown. She is still mighty impressive being first launched in 1797.

D-fusit on March 13, 2012 at 10:03 AM

USS Entitlement
USS Occupy
USS Iwon

John Deaux on March 13, 2012 at 10:04 AM

The USS If You Want To Keep Your Navy, You Can Keep Your Navy

NotCoach on March 13, 2012 at 10:05 AM

Thanks for posting this. I signed the petition to name the new ship Enterprise. The current Enterprise served extremely honorably, especially in WWII. She deserves to have a namesake.

Little correction. The WWII Enterprise (CV-6) was a Yorktown class, straight deck carrier – our 6th carrier built – with 20 battle stars.

This Enterprise (CVN-65) is the namesake and sole ship of its class, split decked, nuclear powered and a Vietnam War vet.

Cricket624 on March 13, 2012 at 10:07 AM

ships took names that represented the values of the nation that launched them

USS Contraception

smitty41 on March 13, 2012 at 10:08 AM

circa 2020

USS This Is The Only Ship In Our Navy Because The Interest Payments On Our Debt Funds The Entire Chinese Military

Resist We Much on March 13, 2012 at 10:17 AM

This was sore topic with me when I was still on active duty. I about puked when they chose John Stennis and Carl Vinson. We used to have a system for naming of classes of ships.

That got thrown out the window long ago and now I think they run it by the ACLU before choosing one, like LPD-26 the USS Traitor.

There are scores of actual heroes that should be chosen ahead of political hacks. There are numerous battle sites that could be used. But instead we have naming by focus group study.

My favorite name of all time, goes to the Brits, from whom we take most of our Naval traditions. HMS Dreadnought.

TugboatPhil on March 13, 2012 at 10:21 AM

U.S.S Britney Spears? C’mon at least make it a rocker. How ’bout U.S.S. Alice Cooper. Now we’re talkin’.

vcferlita on March 13, 2012 at 10:23 AM

U.S.S James T. Kirk

Dannyp8262 on March 13, 2012 at 10:26 AM

And because it will be full of seamen?

shaner5000 on March 13, 2012 at 9:33 AM

But they would be dead after a few days, so it wouldn’t be a good moral booster to be assigned to that ship.

LoganSix on March 13, 2012 at 10:26 AM

. I’m from Chicago. Let me show you how it’s done. Here is our new cruiser the USS Barney Frank.

Fear that, folks.

Resist We Much on March 13, 2012 at 9:24 AM

CorporatePiggy on March 13, 2012 at 9:28 AM

Geez… That boat would always be bringing up the rear

Shepherd Lover on March 13, 2012 at 10:26 AM

Naming a ship after Gabbie Giffords is bad enough but not nearly offensive as the one to be named after Jack Murtha. A corrupt bastard on the dole from defense contractors for decades. And, Murtha, you might remember is the one who called those Marines murderers.

As to CVN-80, I’d like to see the name go to another recently decommissioned carrier, USS America.

Happy Nomad on March 13, 2012 at 10:26 AM

vcferlita on March 13, 2012 at 10:23 AM

USS Ted Nugent.

CurtZHP on March 13, 2012 at 10:28 AM

The current Enterprise served extremely honorably, especially in WWII. She deserves to have a namesake.

DRayRaven on March 13, 2012 at 9:55 AM

No, she didn’t. IIRC there was a 10 years span between Enterprise CV-6 and CVN-65.

CVN-80 the USS Constitution, because we need to remember it now before it’s gone forever.

BTW, I know that the USS Constitution is still an active ship,

D-fusit on March 13, 2012 at 10:03 AM

Cannot have two ships with the same name commissioned at the same time. That’s the same reason the will not be another USS Arizona. The hulk is still under commission.

cozmo on March 13, 2012 at 10:28 AM

USS Hiroshima :-)

USS Robert Byrd, whitest sheets in the fleet!

The_Livewire on March 13, 2012 at 10:28 AM

Knowing this bunch of clowns it will be the USS Global Apology

PJ Emeritus on March 13, 2012 at 10:29 AM

Stop the madness before we christen a new ship the USS Britney Spears

What would be the point? Hasn’t everyone already ridden…oh, never mind.

Snowed In on March 13, 2012 at 10:31 AM

Now, the USS Nugent might inspire some fear.

Free Indeed on March 13, 2012 at 10:32 AM

Geez… That boat would always be bringing up the rear…

Shepherd Lover on March 13, 2012 at 10:26 AM

And its crew would never have to tuck in their shirts.

Shy Guy on March 13, 2012 at 10:32 AM

Doh!

vcferlita on March 13, 2012 at 10:23 AM

USS Ted Nugent.

Beat me to it!

Free Indeed on March 13, 2012 at 10:32 AM

As to CVN-80, I’d like to see the name go to another recently decommissioned carrier, USS America.

Happy Nomad on March 13, 2012 at 10:26 AM

Happy, that is going to be used on a new Amphibious Carrier, LHD-6.

TugboatPhil on March 13, 2012 at 10:33 AM

Now, the USS Nugent might inspire some fear.

Free Indeed on March 13, 2012 at 10:32 AM

Especially if the took the Nuge’s motto as well.

Kill it, and grill it, then eat it.

cozmo on March 13, 2012 at 10:34 AM

Happy Nomad on March 13, 2012 at 10:26 AM

My bad, I just recalled the Navy has an amphibious ship in construction to be called America.

Just hoping we don’t end up with the USS Che Guevera to complement the USS Cesar Chavez.

Happy Nomad on March 13, 2012 at 10:34 AM

Happy, that is going to be used on a new Amphibious Carrier, LHD-6.

TugboatPhil on March 13, 2012 at 10:33 AM

Yeah, I caught that too after hitting submit.

Happy Nomad on March 13, 2012 at 10:36 AM

And its crew would never have to tuck in their shirts.

Shy Guy on March 13, 2012 at 10:32 AM

U.S. Navy dress code would require all (male) crew members to tie their shirt-tails in a knot above their navels.

Hey Thailor!

/s

Shepherd Lover on March 13, 2012 at 10:37 AM

U.S.S. Senator Ma’am.

kit dinker on March 13, 2012 at 10:37 AM

…nothing named by the U.S. government — not a building, not a scholarship program, certainly not one of the greatest warships built by mankind — should be named after a living person…

U.S.S. DAVY JONES

playblu on March 13, 2012 at 10:37 AM

It is appropriate to name a Destroyer the George H. W. Bush. Destroyers are named for famous and heroic Navy and Marine Corps personnel. Bush I was the youngest naval aviator in history. That is significant enough to name a DDG after him.

jerryofva on March 13, 2012 at 10:37 AM

My favorite name of all time, goes to the Brits, from whom we take most of our Naval traditions. HMS Dreadnought.

TugboatPhil on March 13, 2012 at 10:21 AM

We no longer live in the era of “Nothing to Fear”.

Given the current administration it should be the USS Empty Promise.

Difficultas_Est_Imperium on March 13, 2012 at 10:38 AM

The USS Anthony Weiner would be a pocket battleship.

viking01 on March 13, 2012 at 10:39 AM

The USS Anthony Weiner would be a pocket battleship.

viking01 on March 13, 2012 at 10:39 AM

Dingy.

The Weiner man certainly is no battleship, pocket battleship, pre-dreadnought, or second class battleship.

cozmo on March 13, 2012 at 10:42 AM

It is appropriate to name a Destroyer the George H. W. Bush. Destroyers are named for famous and heroic Navy and Marine Corps personnel. Bush I was the youngest naval aviator in history. That is significant enough to name a DDG after him.

jerryofva on March 13, 2012 at 10:37 AM

Seems more fitting that they are naming an aircraft carrier after him.

Happy Nomad on March 13, 2012 at 10:42 AM

Hmmm, what would today’s version be? USS Grifter? USS Moocher? USS Entitlements? USS Trillion Dollar Deficits?

AZCoyote on March 13, 2012 at 9:29 AM

USS Gimme?

hawksruleva on March 13, 2012 at 10:44 AM

Shut the thread down! Shut the thread down! Anti-climatic posts after these! (just put giant condoms over the guns!)

KOOLAID2 on March 13, 2012 at 9:37 AM

Silly. You don’t use condoms on guns, you use tampons.

trigon on March 13, 2012 at 10:44 AM

The Weiner man certainly is no battleship, pocket battleship, pre-dreadnought, or second class battleship.

cozmo on March 13, 2012 at 10:42 AM

Yeah, if the Navy ever makes a class of small yappy ineffective dinghies, Weiner has a shot.

Happy Nomad on March 13, 2012 at 10:44 AM

cozmo on March 13, 2012 at 10:42 AM

Should have emphasized “pocket.” He’s definitely well below treaty.

viking01 on March 13, 2012 at 10:45 AM

Silly. You don’t use condoms on guns, you use tampons.

trigon on March 13, 2012 at 10:44 AM

Nope, condoms are used to cover guns to to keep the dirt out. Non-lubricated though.

cozmo on March 13, 2012 at 10:49 AM

USS Sandra Fluke

Free Indeed on March 13, 2012 at 9:18 AM

That one has good berth control.

philoquin on March 13, 2012 at 9:21 AM

And because it will be full of seamen?

shaner5000 on March 13, 2012 at 9:33 AM

Ba-doom!

John the Libertarian on March 13, 2012 at 10:50 AM

Knowing this administration, the name will come from somewhere out of left field. WAY out of left field:

USS Saul Alinsky.

Or, maybe it will be a shout-out to a more contemporary, important supporter:

USS Warren Buffet
or
USS Warren Buffet’s Secretary

Personally, thinking out of the box, I’d prefer something like this:

USS How Am I Going To Explain This To Sasha And Malia

djm1992 on March 13, 2012 at 10:51 AM

Should have emphasized “pocket.” He’s definitely well below treaty.

viking01 on March 13, 2012 at 10:45 AM

Now you’re on to something. Even the truncated Nelson’s were more of a battleship than Weiner though. Weiner doesn’t even come close to the original monitors.

cozmo on March 13, 2012 at 10:53 AM

Comment pages: 1 2 3