Bad news, Canada. America loves you.

posted at 8:00 pm on February 18, 2012 by Jazz Shaw

Andrew Malcolm brings us some good news on the front of international peace and love, but some bad news for the Great White North. It turns out that of all the many nations in the world, aside from our own, Americans love Canada the best.

A new Gallup Poll finds that it’s become Americans’ most very favorite foreign country both now and in the 20 years Gallup has inquired about such things.

Americans may not have been there and may be abysmally ignorant about a next-door neighbor (or neighbour) that is by far its largest trading partner, best friend and closest ally. (Until the last election Harvard grad Barack Obama thought they had a president up there.)

But Gallup finds that a record 96% of Americans are feeling the love for that northern land of toques that’s 10% larger than the United States with one-tenth the population. U.S. lovers of Canada are up 4% just in the past year.

In fact, liking Canada is almost unanimous in the 57 states. Only 3% of Americans think unfavorably (or unfavourably) of Canada, and they probably don’t even know where it is. (North of everything except Alaska and Detroit.)

But that’s good news, right? I mean, they’re not just our neighbor and largest trading partner, but they are responsible for the other half of one of the longest international land borders in the world. We want to be on good terms, and so should they, right? Not so fast there, back bacon fans.

When Americans start paying attention to anything, even if it’s positive, they tend to unintentionally smother, crush the bushes and walk all over the flower beds, telling you how really glad they are to be there, you know what I mean? It’s as if Randy McQuaid came for the weekend — and stayed a month.

But not everyone is feeling the love for Canada. Hey… don’t get the wrong idea, here. I’m not talking about me. I love Canada. I’ve spent a lot of time there. Amazing fishing and hunting, great food, wonderful people. And you know what else they have a lot of that I like? Oil.

But as I said, not everyone loves Canada. Some people thumb their noses at them, turn down their offers to build pipelines and send their Prime Minister scurrying off with hurt feelings to go make deals with China.

But not me. I don’t blame Canada, even if the kids on South Park do. A short video tribute to close:


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But Gallup finds that a record 96% of Americans are feeling the love for that northern land of toques

Priase the Lord, and pass the crullers!

Tim_CA on February 18, 2012 at 8:06 PM

They only polled Hot Air and we have canopfor!

KOOLAID2 on February 18, 2012 at 8:07 PM

“We love you, eh?”

… No homo!

/

Seven Percent Solution on February 18, 2012 at 8:07 PM

I always wanted to be a lumberjack.

BillH on February 18, 2012 at 8:10 PM

You’re like America’s hat you hoseheads. You protect us from all those mean ol’ polar bears.

29Victor on February 18, 2012 at 8:10 PM

Mmmmm…Back bacon!
:)

Ladysmith CulchaVulcha on February 18, 2012 at 8:10 PM

I always wanted to be a lumberjack.

BillH on February 18, 2012 at 8:10 PM

and you’re ok!

29Victor on February 18, 2012 at 8:11 PM

They only polled Hot Air and we have canopfor!

KOOLAID2 on February 18, 2012 at 8:07 PM

The 3% that did not like Canada said it was because they had read postings of some DaveDrywall guy or something!

KOOLAID2 on February 18, 2012 at 8:12 PM

As a Canadian, I like Americans too. But I like to make fun of them every now and then. And I don’t apologize for that. Even your President is stupid. He thinks we have a President. I think Obama was disappointed that we don’t have as high an office as the US does at the national level.

MrX on February 18, 2012 at 8:13 PM

This is why Americans love Canada.
It’s all you need to know

dentalque on February 18, 2012 at 8:18 PM

We love you Canada!
It’s only our pResident who doesn’t want your oil.

JimboHoffa on February 18, 2012 at 8:19 PM

Montreal is the most romantic city I’ve ever been to (sorry, ‘dog-crap-on-the-sidewalks’ Paris). Still, Molson beer suuuuuucks!

Ladysmith CulchaVulcha on February 18, 2012 at 8:19 PM

As a canadian citizen I’m pleased, I’m also an Israeli citizen and this Gallup poll wasn’t just on Canada. Record numbers of Americans approve of Israel was well.. 71%.

Feeling the love and sending it right back.

saus on February 18, 2012 at 8:19 PM

As a Canadian, I like Americans too. But I like to make fun of them every now and then. And I don’t apologize for that. Even your President is stupid. He thinks we have a President. I think Obama was disappointed that we don’t have as high an office as the US does at the national level.

MrX on February 18, 2012 at 8:13 PM

Doesn’t really matter, good sir- PM Harper has done for Canada far and above whatever what I wish President Lightworker, SCoaMF, could do for us.

Go ahead and have a few snickers at our expense- Lord knows we do occasionally deserve it.

BillH on February 18, 2012 at 8:20 PM

Oh good, I had misgivings about posting a link to a vid clip from Canadian Bacon since it’s a Michael Moore flick…but, since Jazz did it:

Never say this in Canada.

Left Coast Right Mind on February 18, 2012 at 8:20 PM

South Park hardest hit!
Blame Canada!
Yummy, french fries with curds smothered with brown gravy.

carbon_footprint on February 18, 2012 at 8:21 PM

They only polled Hot Air and we have canopfor!

KOOLAID2 on February 18, 2012 at 8:07 PM

And heshtesh,although i’ve lived here 20 years.

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 8:21 PM

Except for Albertans, don’t expect any gratitude. Most Canadians hate Americans because it’s all they have as a culture. I was in Toronto on 9/11 – those who didn’t cheer openly did so quietly. Many demand the cessation of exports to ‘punish’ the US, totally ignoring the consequences on them. Fortunately for them, the US and the rest of their world, their government ignores such foolishness. In fact, the Liberal government in 2003 openly lied to the public about not being involved in the Iraq War, when they clearly were. Basically, Canada’s greatest strength is that it is a cheap copy of the US.

KillerKane on February 18, 2012 at 8:22 PM

I always wanted to be a lumberjack.

BillH on February 18, 2012 at 8:10 PM

and you’re ok!

29Victor on February 18, 2012 at 8:11 PM

They sleep all night and they work all day!

Tim_CA on February 18, 2012 at 8:22 PM

Mmmmm…Back bacon!
:)

Ladysmith CulchaVulcha on February 18, 2012 at 8:10 PM

My family brings 50 lbs. every time they visit.

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 8:23 PM

Somebody go over and tell Dr T , that we are over here talking about lumberjacks, flannel shirts and beer…before he gets that gay sheriff thread up to 2,000 comments…will ya! (:>)

KOOLAID2 on February 18, 2012 at 8:25 PM

Montreal is the most romantic city I’ve ever been to (sorry, ‘dog-crap-on-the-sidewalks’ Paris). Still, Molson beer suuuuuucks!

Ladysmith CulchaVulcha on February 18, 2012 at 8:19 PM

Labatt Blue is the best beer in Canada,second best is OV,affectionately refered to as Old Vagina:,if you want to get sh!tfaced drink Carlsburg Gold.

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 8:28 PM

“We love you, eh?”

… No homo!

/

Seven Percent Solution on February 18, 2012 at 8:07 PM

(No, that’s on the thread next door!)

KOOLAID2 on February 18, 2012 at 8:28 PM

Montreal is the most romantic city I’ve ever been to (sorry, ‘dog-crap-on-the-sidewalks’ Paris). Still, Molson beer suuuuuucks!

Ladysmith CulchaVulcha on February 18, 2012 at 8:19 PM

Labatt Blue is the best beer in Canada,second best i OV affectionately refered to as Old Vag!na:),if you want to get shitfaced drink Carlsburg Gold.

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 8:36 PM

Still, Molson beer suuuuuucks!

Ladysmith CulchaVulcha on February 18, 2012 at 8:19 PM

Come home with me to Slovakia. We know all about great beer.

JPeterman on February 18, 2012 at 8:38 PM

Still, Molson beer suuuuuucks!

Ladysmith CulchaVulcha on February 18, 2012 at 8:19 PM

Yeah, but Canadian whiskey is the best. Except for Black Velvet, which is some nasty-ass swill.

Walter Sobchak on February 18, 2012 at 8:43 PM

I like the part of Canada that is non-frog. Ribet.

yubley on February 18, 2012 at 8:44 PM

Yeah, but Canadian whiskey is the best. Except for Black Velvet, which is some nasty-ass swill.

Walter Sobchak on February 18, 2012 at 8:43 PM

I’ll see that….and raise you a nice, small batch. nine-year-old -minimum Kentucky bourbon whiskey my good sir.

Tim_CA on February 18, 2012 at 8:47 PM

I’ll see that….and raise you a nice, small batch. nine-year-old -minimum Kentucky bourbon whiskey my good sir.

Tim_CA on February 18, 2012 at 8:47 PM

Kessler?

JimboHoffa on February 18, 2012 at 8:52 PM

Pretty positive towards Canada here but I don’t think they’re 10% bigger than us. More like 15% bigger whenever you look at them on a map they’re HUGE, and they’re the 2nd largest nation on the planet. The United States looks like it’s 5th largest in the world. What gives?!?

The Nerve on February 18, 2012 at 8:54 PM

Kessler?

JimboHoffa on February 18, 2012 at 8:52 PM

Makers Mark?

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 8:55 PM

I will give Canada this, that country has some of the BEST hunting and fishing on Gods green earth.

JimboHoffa on February 18, 2012 at 8:58 PM

Somebody go over and tell Dr T , that we are over here talking about lumberjacks, flannel shirts and beer…before he gets that gay sheriff thread up to 2,000 comments…will ya! (:>)

KOOLAID2 on February 18, 2012 at 8:25 PM

What? A gay sheriff thread? I need to start reading the Hot Air home page closely.

Anyway, I like maple syrup.

TigerPaw on February 18, 2012 at 8:59 PM

Makers Mark?

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 8:55 PM

MMMMMMMM. Sippin whiskey.
Neat.

JimboHoffa on February 18, 2012 at 9:02 PM

This caught my attention as my wife is in Ottawa tonight.
-
Canadians deserve our respect. They have always fought along side us from D-day to Afghanistan. They have been good neighbors.
-
Recall:
9/11 fear sent scores of jets to Canada; Detour landed them in world of generosity

http://www.northjersey.com/specialreports/sept_11_2001_ten_years_later/129511863_9_11_FEAR_SENT_SCORES_OF_JETS_TO_CANADA.html

diogenes on February 18, 2012 at 9:03 PM

I will give Canada this, that country has some of the BEST hunting and fishing on Gods green earth.
JimboHoffa on February 18, 2012 at 8:58 PM

It sure does. : )

listens2glenn on February 18, 2012 at 9:04 PM

No thread about Americans loving Canada would be complete without a mention of the Windsor Ballet.

Flange on February 18, 2012 at 9:05 PM

MMMMMMMM. Sippin whiskey.
Neat.

JimboHoffa on February 18, 2012 at 9:02 PM

Every time i go to Kentucky to visit family and friends they always seem to bypass the sippin part.

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 9:05 PM

As a Canadian, I like Americans too. But I like to make fun of them every now and then. And I don’t apologize for that. Even your President is stupid. He thinks we have a President. I think Obama was disappointed that we don’t have as high an office as the US does at the national level.

MrX on February 18, 2012 at 8:13 PM

A lot of Americans deserve to be made fun of, the one’s that voted for that a$$ clown, BO. Also, I agree with you my frozen friend, our president is stupid. Hopefully about nine months from now we’re smart enough to show stupidity the door.

msupertas on February 18, 2012 at 9:05 PM

I love going to “The Beer Store” just over the Detroit river (take the tunnel). They have beer there called 3.5%, 5.4% and 7.9%. That is the actual names. Used to be able to mix and match them but not anymore. And the Molson XXX is way better there then what you get here.

mechkiller_k on February 18, 2012 at 9:06 PM

No thread about Americans loving Canada would be complete without a mention of the Windsor Ballet.

Flange on February 18, 2012 at 9:05 PM

A nod to my hometown Windsor Ont,:)

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 9:07 PM

South Park hardest hit!
Blame Canada!
Yummy, french fries with curds smothered with brown gravy.

carbon_footprint on February 18, 2012 at 8:21 PM

I LOVE POUTINE!!!!

GOD I AM PROUD TO BE CANADIAN !!! :)

cableguy615 on February 18, 2012 at 9:08 PM

Also, it is legal for women to be topless in Toronto all the time (and not just the strip clubs, i.e. “The ballet”). I only saw this once at an outdoor cafe but I am willing to go back and look again.

mechkiller_k on February 18, 2012 at 9:08 PM

Kessler?

JimboHoffa on February 18, 2012 at 8:52 PM

Makers Mark?

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 8:55 PM

Try “Bullet” from KY. Has the highest rye content for a bourbon in the USA.

mechkiller_k on February 18, 2012 at 9:11 PM

I love going to “The Beer Store” just over the Detroit river (take the tunnel). They have beer there called 3.5%, 5.4% and 7.9%. That is the actual names. Used to be able to mix and match them but not anymore. And the Molson XXX is way better there then what you get here.

mechkiller_k on February 18, 2012 at 9:06 PM

That’s 8 % alcohol, we also have a beer called Crest . (10%), 4 tall cans of that would give David Crosby a lost weekend!

cableguy615 on February 18, 2012 at 9:11 PM

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 9:07 PM

Hi there my former southern neighbor. Spent a majority of my life in Detroit. I’ve had a lot of fun in your hometown.

Flange on February 18, 2012 at 9:12 PM

Also, it is legal for women to be topless in Toronto all the time (and not just the strip clubs, i.e. “The ballet”). I only saw this once at an outdoor cafe but I am willing to go back and look again.

mechkiller_k on February 18, 2012 at 9:08 PM

Used to ride my bicycle on the scenic trail in Windsor and every once in a while some 20 something would go roller bladeing by topless,always caught my attention.:)

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 9:14 PM

No thread about Americans loving Canada would be complete without a mention of the Windsor Ballet.

Flange on February 18, 2012 at 9:05 PM

Ahh yes. Culture on the Detroit river. All 19 year old males make the trip to “the ballet” to spend their birthday money on beer (legal to drink) and French/Canadian strippers. Just don’t touch the girls.

mechkiller_k on February 18, 2012 at 9:15 PM

I love going to “The Beer Store” just over the Detroit river (take the tunnel). They have beer there called 3.5%, 5.4% and 7.9%. That is the actual names. Used to be able to mix and match them but not anymore. And the Molson XXX is way better there then what you get here.

mechkiller_k on February 18, 2012 at 9:06 PM

No thread about Americans loving Canada would be complete without a mention of the Windsor Ballet.

Flange on February 18, 2012 at 9:05 PM

A nod to my hometown Windsor Ont,:)

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 9:07 PM

There’s more people from my area on Hot Air than I thought! I like that! I’ve been telling my friends for a couple of years and get that blank look from them. They know Drudge, Townhall, and some others…but not Hot Air.

KOOLAID2 on February 18, 2012 at 9:16 PM

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 8:36 PM

There’s also a good 5% beer called James Ready that is tastes good and is reasonably priced.

cableguy615 on February 18, 2012 at 9:18 PM

Hi there my former southern neighbor. Spent a majority of my life in Detroit. I’ve had a lot of fun in your hometown.

Flange on February 18, 2012 at 9:12 PM

As did i my former northern neighbour in Detroit at the Roostertail,Harpo’s and Greektown.:)

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 9:19 PM

Meh, I don’t have anything against Canada, Its far enough north, heII I never go that far north.

Bmore on February 18, 2012 at 9:21 PM

This caught my attention as my wife is in Ottawa tonight.
-
Canadians deserve our respect. They have always fought along side us from D-day to Afghanistan. They have been good neighbors.
-
Recall:
9/11 fear sent scores of jets to Canada; Detour landed them in world of generosity

http://www.northjersey.com/specialreports/sept_11_2001_ten_years_later/129511863_9_11_FEAR_SENT_SCORES_OF_JETS_TO_CANADA.html

diogenes on February 18, 2012 at 9:03 PM

And most of us will never forget it!
JugEars?

KOOLAID2 on February 18, 2012 at 9:22 PM

My wife just reminded me, we bought our major kitchen appliances from you Canooks, pretty decent job you did at that.

Bmore on February 18, 2012 at 9:23 PM

Kessler?

JimboHoffa on February 18, 2012 at 8:52 PM

Knob Creek….but I see you’re a fellow traveler…..lol.

Tim_CA on February 18, 2012 at 9:23 PM

FULL DISCLOSURE.

Y’all makin me tirsty, but I am in recovery. That does not mean that I have forgotten what good booze and beer taste like. Two beers: Moose Drool and Horny Goat.

JimboHoffa on February 18, 2012 at 9:25 PM

Jazz, how you coming along on that QOTD thread eh?

Bmore on February 18, 2012 at 9:27 PM

A lot of Americans deserve to be made fun of, the one’s that voted for that a$$ clown, BO. Also, I agree with you my frozen friend, our president is stupid. Hopefully about nine months from now we’re smart enough to show stupidity the door.

msupertas on February 18, 2012 at 9:05 PM

That would make the entire world more friendly, I would think. The One’s actions have effects all over the world, but he just doesn’t care. I’ve never known Americans to back down, so I know there are better days ahead.

MrX on February 18, 2012 at 9:27 PM

Meh, I don’t have anything against Canada, Its far enough north, heII I never go that far north.

Bmore on February 18, 2012 at 9:21 PM

Go to the UP in Michigan and most parts of Canada and you will come to the north more often!

KOOLAID2 on February 18, 2012 at 9:29 PM

Jazz, how you coming along on that QOTD thread eh?

Bmore on February 18, 2012 at 9:27 PM

This seems to be becoming the QOTD thread it seems.

JimboHoffa on February 18, 2012 at 9:30 PM

Also, it is legal for women to be topless in Toronto all the time (and not just the strip clubs, i.e. “The ballet”). I only saw this once at an outdoor cafe but I am willing to go back and look again.

mechkiller_k on February 18, 2012 at 9:08 PM

LOL!

Vince on February 18, 2012 at 9:33 PM

Y’all makin me tirsty, but I am in recovery. That does not mean that I have forgotten what good booze and beer taste like. Two beers: Moose Drool and Horny Goat.

JimboHoffa on February 18, 2012 at 9:25 PM

Good fortune to you with your recovery.

Vince on February 18, 2012 at 9:35 PM

I think Obama was disappointed that we don’t have as high an office as the US does at the national level.

MrX on February 18, 2012 at 8:13 PM

We are a lot closer to Mexico. The marijuana here is a lot more potent.

unclesmrgol on February 18, 2012 at 9:41 PM

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 9:19 PM

I use to work at Sindbad’s and the Roostertail. A buddy of mine from High School is reopening the London Chop House later the summer.

Flange on February 18, 2012 at 9:44 PM

There’s more people from my area on Hot Air than I thought! I like that! I’ve been telling my friends for a couple of years and get that blank look from them. They know Drudge, Townhall, and some others…but not Hot Air.

KOOLAID2 on February 18, 2012 at 9:16 PM

Surely everyone up there must know Ed Morrisey, who became the custodian (and the poster) of all the adscam stuff when your press was prohibited by court order from discussing the thing….

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ed_Morrissey

http://www.captainsquartersblog.com/mt/archives/cat_canada.php

unclesmrgol on February 18, 2012 at 9:45 PM

Sorry, Ed,…

Ed Morrissey. Two esses.

unclesmrgol on February 18, 2012 at 9:46 PM

That would make the entire world more friendly, I would think. The One’s actions have effects all over the world, but he just doesn’t care. I’ve never known Americans to back down, so I know there are better days ahead.

MrX on February 18, 2012 at 9:27 PM

MrX, I don’t know you, but I like your style. God bless you and your great country. We all need to have some HOPE for some CHANGE.

msupertas on February 18, 2012 at 9:48 PM

We are a lot closer to Mexico. The marijuana here is a lot more potent.

unclesmrgol on February 18, 2012 at 9:41 PM

lol….the point is becoming moot anyway. Serious production growing in both countries has moved indoors under high-intensity lighting and sophisticated co2 and nutrient injection systems.

Talk about a “growth” industry. If the feds weren’t set against it….half of California retail frontage would be “Dispensaries” and “Hydroponic Stores”.

Tim_CA on February 18, 2012 at 9:51 PM

Good fortune to you with your recovery.

Vince on February 18, 2012 at 9:35 PM

Thank you, the support of family, friends and peers(and I call a lot of people on this site friends) help a lot.

JimboHoffa on February 18, 2012 at 9:52 PM

I liked Australia until they went bat-crap crazy on AGW and firearms. Read that Canada is doing away with their long gun registry.

marinetbryant on February 18, 2012 at 9:55 PM

Frankly, what is there not to like about Canada?

Awesome place to visit/live. Except for the lunatic liberal fringe, some pretty awesome people up there, too.

That having to learn French thing…well…it’s Canada.

BTW…Quebecois is not French. Found that out many years ago in France. Turns out my High School French teachers/nuns did their “overseas” language study out in the province of Quebec.

Had it not been for a few surly and quite rude French folks, I’d have never found out.

A Canadian would never be like that.

Pop open a Labatt’s or Carlings Black Label and salute our Northern neighbors…nice people. Except for that shutting down the Drewry’s beer company and selling it to an Indiana outfit….

:-)

coldwarrior on February 18, 2012 at 9:56 PM

I use to work at Sindbad’s and the Roostertail. A buddy of mine from High School is reopening the London Chop House later the summer.

Flange on February 18, 2012 at 9:44 PM

I used to go to Sinbads all the time for lunch ect,used to live on our family boat every year from April 15th. to Nov.1st. at the city marina then we stored it indoors in Algonac Mich for the winters.

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 10:01 PM

Pretty positive towards Canada here but I don’t think they’re 10% bigger than us. More like 15% bigger whenever you look at them on a map they’re HUGE, and they’re the 2nd largest nation on the planet. The United States looks like it’s 5th largest in the world. What gives?!?

The Nerve on February 18, 2012 at 8:54 PM

If the land never thaws, does it really count?

Married a Canadian and lived there 3 years. Had no idea there were anti-American sentiments so deeply rooted up there. Couldn’t wait to move back.

Sorry, U.S. I’m afraid this is a one-sided love affair.

parteagirl on February 18, 2012 at 10:09 PM

Any canuk still eating blood pudding? We used to eat it, fried and it was good, but now when I say it, it sounds awful.

Bambi on February 18, 2012 at 10:20 PM

They gave us Rush. As far as I’m concerned we owe them.

Caiwyn on February 18, 2012 at 10:25 PM

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 10:01 PM

I’m a son of a sailor. I’m familiar with that timeline. Lake St. Clair is a great lake for boating and most people don’t realize how big it is. It should be considered one of the Great Lakes.

Flange on February 18, 2012 at 10:27 PM

I always wanted to be a lumberjack.

BillH on February 18, 2012 at 8:10 PM

Umm did you mean to post that in another thread.

Night all. :)

Bunsin2 on February 18, 2012 at 10:35 PM

Who’s up for some music?

This has to be one of the most infectious melodies to come out of Canada.

Love this song and album.

PatriotGal2257 on February 18, 2012 at 10:37 PM

This is what i grew up with,good times:)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7miRCLeFSJo

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 10:53 PM

Well…we sure don’t like all of the stupid Bob ‘n Doug McKenzie stereotypes. Believe me, you have to go pretty rural to find people who actually speak like that. They’re kind of similar to your Deliverance-type hillbillies.

NorthernEx on February 18, 2012 at 10:54 PM

The maplesuckers took Juno Beach, and they have a Hell of a navy. They’re fine by me.

Oh and their banking system is not half bad, either.

WeekendAtBernankes on February 18, 2012 at 11:13 PM

Didn’t poll me. I can’t stand that country of cowards.

The Notorious G.O.P on February 18, 2012 at 11:16 PM

Bishop is still trying to work out a deal to give Wisconsin and Vermont to Canada..:)

Dire Straits on February 18, 2012 at 11:18 PM

“Didn’t poll me. I can’t stand that country of cowards.

The Notorious G.O.P on February 18, 2012 at 11:16 PM”

We were fighting the Germans when America couldn’t be bothered. The very term “Stormtroopers” was invented by terrified Germans to describe Canadians. We are 1/10th your population, but we still took a beach at Normandy. And we have been fighting hard in Afghanistan.

We also gave you as good as we got in the War of 1812. You should know we took parts of Maine, New England, Michigan and New York State, and only returned them when negotiating peace with a stunned America.

And we live in one of the harshest climates in the planet.

Don’t you dare call us cowards unless you can back it up.

Johnny 100 Pesos on February 18, 2012 at 11:27 PM

I use to work at Sindbad’s and the Roostertail. A buddy of mine from High School is reopening the London Chop House later the summer.

Flange on February 18, 2012 at 9:44 PM

I worked at the Roostertail as a night security guard when I was home from college on Christmas vacation once, and frequented Sinbad’s for the food. Just read about London Chop house! Good!

KOOLAID2 on February 18, 2012 at 11:37 PM

Alberta tops in North America for economic freedom

According to new report by the Fraser Institute, Alberta is the most economically free jurisdiction in North America, topping all other provinces and states, based on data from 2009.

The report measured three key indicators: size of government, taxation, and labour market freedom.

While Alberta’s 10% flat tax on personal income and zero sales tax helped it to come out on top, American states no doubt suffered because of increased regulation in reaction to stock market and housing collapses and large outlays for wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.

As the National Post posits, “As the logic goes, economic freedom decreases when governments spend because spending requires revenue, which generally comes from taxes, meaning people are less free to spend and invest their income.”

The only other province to make a significant gain was Saskatchewan, which ranked 32nd overall.

While other Canadian provinces scored much lower, Canada as a whole gained in economic freedom compared to the United States primarily because of the aforementioned causes.

Business investors fulfilling certain criteria may be eligible to immigrate to Alberta, and other provinces, under the Federal Investor or Entrepreneur programs. You can find out if you are eligible using our assessment form.

Tuesday, 22 November 2011 Category Federal Immigration
Calgary Skyline

The Fraser Institute is a Canadian-based conservative think tank.

Johnny 100 Pesos on February 18, 2012 at 11:39 PM

I don’t blame Canada, even if the kids on South Park do.

It wasn’t the kids who blamed Canada!

Tzetzes on February 18, 2012 at 11:40 PM

Mmmmm…Back bacon!
:)

Ladysmith CulchaVulcha on February 18, 2012 at 8:10 PM

My family brings 50 lbs. every time they visit.

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 8:23 PM

I’ll be checking my mailbox for your invitation to partake!
:)

Ladysmith CulchaVulcha on February 18, 2012 at 11:45 PM

Don’t you dare call us cowards unless you can back it up.

Johnny 100 Pesos on February 18, 2012 at 11:27 PM

You forgot the corvettes.

unclesmrgol on February 18, 2012 at 11:47 PM

Dang. Been hanging out on the wrong thread. Here is where the happenin’ is!

Labatt Blue is the best beer in Canada,second best i OV affectionately refered to as Old Vag!na:),if you want to get shitfaced drink Carlsburg Gold.

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 8:36 PM

About that second beer? Hey, Buddy! I resemble resent that remark!
:D

Come home with me to Slovakia. We know all about great beer.

JPeterman on February 18, 2012 at 8:38 PM

Yay! I’ve got a fur coat and everything!
:)

Yeah, but Canadian whiskey is the best. Except for Black Velvet, which is some nasty-ass swill.

Walter Sobchak on February 18, 2012 at 8:43 PM

Can’t argue with that!
:)

Ladysmith CulchaVulcha on February 18, 2012 at 11:54 PM

Johnny 100 Pesos on February 18, 2012 at 11:27 PM

Thanks for saving me the trouble,as for Notorious GOP kiss my azzz.

heshtesh on February 18, 2012 at 11:55 PM

Indeed, Canada has been an ally of thee United States. Not as good an ally as the Aussies, who stood with us in Vietnam and Iraq. The Canucks didn’t.

About 4 years ago, relations with the Great White North weren’t so good. In fact some in the Canadian media were worried that America might take over Canada – and that we wouldn’t need the military, just a girl scout troop with an attitude, in less than an hour. I came across the following “op order’ from “the powers that be” on the sink of the men’s room at Grand central station, about 4 years ago. I can’t vouch for the authenticity, but it sounds real.

———

FROM: POTUS
TO: Girl Scout Troop 413 (“The Bluebird Borne”)
SUBJECT: OP ORDER FOR THE CONQUEST OF CANADA TO EXPAND CANADA INTO OUR EMPIRE, BECAUSE WE CAN!

Task Organization:
GS Troop 413 from Minneapolis, MN will be the primary assault force. Code name: Valkyrie.
Greater Minneapolis School District will provide the Bluebird buses for transport. Code name: Busman.
WeatherChannel will provide radar-weather surveillence. Code name: Weatherguessers
15 USAF C-17 will provide airlift: Code name: Santa Claus.

I. Situation:
1) An obnoxious situation exists north of the United States of America border in a country formally named CANADA, but more popularly known as CANUCKISTAN. Hockey playing, back-bacon, beer guzzling devotes to the McKenzie Brothers have turned the northern part of the North American Continent into a breeding place. Besides stinking up North America with noisy beer farts, CANUCKISTANIS have a holier-than-thou demeaner totally unjustified to their place as menial servants to America.

2) CANUCKISTANI citizens visit the USA, populate our newsgroups, and generally make asses of themselves with their mispronunciation of words ending in “out” and their funny spelling habits.

3) The current CANUCKISTAN government is rife with subsidized beer importing into the United States, threatening our native beer brewing industries. In addition, CANUCKISTAN represents an immediate threat to the national security of the United States because of the possibility of western CANUCKISTAN splitting the confederation and seeking union with the United States, even though we don’t want them as part of the United States. The third fact is that too many kewl TV shows are made in CANUCKISTAN, causing labor stress in Hollywoodland. Strike that last, that’s not a good reason after all.

4) CANUCKISTAN must be taught a lesson about messing with their betters south of their border, especially Texans.

A: Enemy Forces:
1) Weather: Winter weather persists over North America. Snow, winds, sub-freezing temperatures cover most of CANUKISTAN at this time of the year. Valkyrie personnel will be need to be equiped with galoshes and mittens and other appropriate cold weather gear.

2) Terrain: Terrain varies. Arctic snowfields, heavily wooded forests, rural, and Garbage Dumps in side certain urban areas intermixed with Eskimo reservations and seal killing fields covered in yukky blood and baby seal fur.

3) Enemy order of battle: 4 obsolete submarines, rusting at pier, a dozen or so rusting rowboats referred to as “The Canadian Navy” (giggle), 2 battalions of fellas and gals who march in close order swarming about semi-precision, most of whom are out of the country right now, 4 squadrons of CF18 fighters with airsick crews. Not much else to worry about.

4) Location of enemy: Entire North American Continent north of US borders. Specific location to be determined by (a) beef-fart smell, and (b) empty beer cans on the snow.

5) Current Enemy Activity: Lying around, farting, eating back-bacon from Scooby-Doo lunchboxes, watching CANUCKISTANI version of “Girls Gone Wild” and “Best of Beer Fart Lighting” contests on TV. Enemy is not watching aggression-suppressing Canadian Football due to end of US (i.e., ‘Real’) football season.

6) Strength: None. Canuckistanis are known to be beer-farting back-bacon eaters (koo-kookookoo-KooKooKoo) who, when not lighting their farts, still think it is 1812 and that we give a damn.

7) Probable course of enemy action: Retreat in the face of superior Valkyrie forces, while begging for mercy at having to eat “Thin Mint” weapons.

B. Friendly forces:
1) Busman, which will provide transportation and logistics. Weatherguesser which will provide weather forecasts and advance warning for use of galoshes and mittens. Santa Claus will provide heavy airlift and palletized cases of “Thin Mint” weapons.

2) Adjacent units: None. Valkyrie will not need support units at this time.

3) Fire support: Santa Claus will provide resupply of airdropped GS Cookies, type “Thin Mint.”

C: Attachments: None

D: Detachments: None

II. Misson:
Valkyrie is tasked with the brutal conquest of the country known as CANUCKISTAN or CANADA within the time frame specified (45 minutes).

A. Concept of operation: Valkyrie will line up at the US border (point AA) will proceed north of the border into the major “cities” known as “Toronto, home of Second City” “Quebec,” “Montreal,” “Ottawa,” “Vancouver,” (OBJ) and conquer the people of CANUCKISTAN using fire and maneuver. Floor games and 7-UP breaks will be limited no more than 15 minutes as per unit SOP. Conquered CANUCKISTANI population will be given Wal-Mart blue vests and floor mops with instructions to clean the floors at US WalMart establishments.

1. Maneuver: Busman will transport Valkyrie to staging points. Santa Claus will drop pallets of GS Cookie “Thin Mint” outside OBJ, and resupply when necessary. Valkyrie will enter “cities” and position themselves on street corners and in front of retail outlets and proceed to sell cookies.

2. Fires: Valkyrie will direct fire (“Thin Mints”) upon enemy resistance until enemy surrenders or runs in fear or from indigestion caused by transfat-less “Mints comma Thin.”

B: Tasks to maneuver units: Get Valkyrie from AA to OBJ. Act as repository for mittens and galoshes.

C: Tasks to combat support units: Resupply of “Thin Mints” as necessary.

D: Coordinating Instructions: Kick CANUCKISTANI butts if they look cross eyed at Valkyrie girls, those McKenzie Bros are pervs. Use jump ropes to tie insurgents to street lights if necessary.

IV. Service Support:
A. General: Standard support SOP will be in effect at all times.

B. Supply: One case of 7-UP and 3 jump ropes will be provided for Valkyrie for R&R.

C. Medical Evacuation; None projected. CANUCKISTANIS are known to have been disarmed by their government as well as being beer farters. Provision for dealing with beer-fart burns from lighting should be undertaken.

D. EPW Personnel: EPW will be given blue WalMart vests and name tags and told to mop the floors of WalMart stores throughout North America. WalMart management will assume responsibility upon EPW turnover.

E. Misc:
1. Special Equipment: “Thin Mint” cookies (expired, transfat) for heavy bombardment. “Thin Mint” cookies (transfat-free) for small unit engagement. Cases of 7-UP for entertainment and R&R time. Satellite radio for signals.

V. Command and Signal:
Command and control will operate out of POTUS White House Situation Room. Signal to be maintained via XM Disney, XM Satellite Radio channel.

A. Command: POTUS, White House.

B. Signal:
1. Frequencies: XM115 (The XM Disney Channel)

2. Method: XM Radio downloaded to belt-mounted receiver.

3. Pyrotechnics and signals: Middle finger to be issued by POTUS to Maple Leafs when CANUCKISTAN is conquered.

4. Codewords: “YEEHAW!” and “DON’T MESS WITH TEXAS!”

5. Challenge and Password (behind friendly lines): Challenge: “What about Canada?” Response: “WHO?”

6. Challenge and Password (forward friendly lines): Challenge: “Whose your daddy, Canuck?” Response: “YOU ARE GS 413!”

7. Running Password: “Hockey is a game for pooftahs.”

8. Recognition signals: Dark Green sash over tan blouse and skirt.

9. Special Instructions for RTO: Play lots of Mandy Moore.

End.

Execute order upon POTUS signal. Your signal is “I miss my SCTV.”

———

Fortunately, relations with Canada seem to have improved. This op order was never executed.

georgej on February 19, 2012 at 12:06 AM

I have nothing against Canada.
They made up for inflicting Bryan Adams and Peter Jennings on us by giving us Rush…so they’re OK by me.

DRayRaven on February 19, 2012 at 12:08 AM

The Simpsons in Canada.

Tzetzes on February 19, 2012 at 12:08 AM

Sorry, U.S. I’m afraid this is a one-sided love affair.

parteagirl on February 18, 2012 at 10:09 PM

Not entirely. I travel to Canada frequently, and for every shop where the person stared daggers at you when you pulled out your American money (which they are required to take), there were five who’s ask where you are from and how things are there.

I learned to not provoke the natives by keeping a ready reserve of Loonies available for use, taking upon myself whatever exchange rate is necessary.

When in Rome, do…

unclesmrgol on February 19, 2012 at 12:18 AM

I was an illegal immigrant in Canada for a couple of days in 1974. My cousin and I took a boat trip up the Taku River from Juneau without notifying the proper authorities. We smuggled in a bunch of beer, though we neglected to smuggle it back.

Tyrone Slothrop on February 19, 2012 at 12:34 AM

georgej on February 19, 2012 at 12:06 AM

If the Girl Scout invasion happens, will you be leading it in your Girl Scout uniform?

Listen:

Once, former US president Thomas Jefferson told President James Madison that taking Canada would be a “mere matter of marching.” So you declared war, and marched in… and got your asses handed to you.

We took Detroit (though we did less damage there than Democrat politicians), the Northern half of Maine, a chunk of New York State and more. Not to say that you didn’t get your knocks in and win the occasional battle (you did burn down Toronto), but we proved tougher than you think, despite our much smaller population – Britain wasn’t much help, they were busy fighting Napoleon.

When Britain was finally able to send help, we really took the offensive, we even burned down Washington (one building had to be painted to hide the smoke damage, and it’s been called the White House ever since).

So your mockery seems very ignorant… unless you have a fear of girl scouts (one suspects you have a fear of all females). And remember, whatever you send, we have Don Cherry on our side.

Johnny 100 Pesos on February 19, 2012 at 12:45 AM

What is all this about Canada giving us Rush? If you are referring to Rush Limbaugh, he was born and raised in Cape Girardeau, Missouri. As far as Canada being our best friend, I think it is one-sided. As far as I’m concerned that honor has and always will go to England, as least until the muslims take completely over.

theaddora on February 19, 2012 at 12:49 AM

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