Michael Medved: MSM issuing a premature post-mortem on marriage

posted at 8:50 pm on December 26, 2011 by Tina Korbe

Michael Medved’s spin on a recent Pew study on marriage has special resonance for me today. In case you missed the articles in The Washington Post and elsewhere in previous weeks, here’s a quick recap: Based on the Pew study, even left-leaning columnists began to profess themselves concerned about the decline of marriage and the family (primarily because they fret the marriage gap will increase the income inequality gap). But in a brief response at Townhall.com, Medved puts the kibosh on the idea that marriage is dead:

The most publicized conclusion featured the information that only a “bare majority”—some 51 percent—of Americans 18 or older are currently married, compared to 72 percent some 50 years ago. But this one figure hides the real cause of the decline: the fact that people today wait longer to tie the knot.

Most people still plan on marriage and value it -including big majorities of the only 28% who have never married. Even the age at first marriage hasn’t changed as radically as reported: the median for males in 1890 was 26, and, 120 years later, it’s 28.

Medved calls for “a more honest accounting” of the numbers among mainstream reporters and calls marriage “the desired, normative goal for most Americans.”

Incidentally, I’m proof of that (and thanks for indulging this revelation): As of today, I’m engaged!


Related Posts:

Breaking on Hot Air

Blowback

Note from Hot Air management: This section is for comments from Hot Air's community of registered readers. Please don't assume that Hot Air management agrees with or otherwise endorses any particular comment just because we let it stand. A reminder: Anyone who fails to comply with our terms of use may lose their posting privilege.

Trackbacks/Pings

Trackback URL

Comments

Comment pages: 1 2

Marriage is in decline because people with borderline upbringings are not socially shamed by having sex outside of marriage.

That may be one reason (and maybe a big reason), but I don’t think it’s the only one.

I think one other factor is that what society now considers the age one should reach full adulthood has been delayed.

It seems to me that many people matured faster decades ago, or were forced to do so. Many of them would get married right out of high school or college (by their early or mid 20s).

But kids in the past few decades have been made to feel as though they have to finish all of high school, get a college diploma, and be established in a career well into their late 20s or early 30s before they’re ready to get married.

By the time you get into your early 30s (or beyond) and you feel mature, capable, and ready enough for marriage, it gets tougher and tougher to meet other singles of your age, especially if you are not at ease on the bar or night clubbing scene or using dating sites.

TigerPaw on December 27, 2011 at 2:10 AM

Congratulations Tina. Best wishes on your pending marriage, and thanks for all the great writing you do here on HA. When the liberals start worrying about the decline in marriage, it’s a sure sign things are improving. LOL

Nicole Coulter on December 27, 2011 at 2:41 AM

Congratulations to you both, Tina! what a wonderful way to start the new year. we got engaged on new years and will be celebrating our 10th anniversary this year. best years of my life. i am so thankful. plus 2 delightful children to love. as a former dem, i could not believe what pessimistic bs i had swallowed regarding marriage and motherhood. my daily state of happiness is much increased by my family.

perries on December 27, 2011 at 5:29 AM

What great news! Congratulations to you and your fiancee. After 28 years of marriage I only can offer two pieces of advice: always have your own opinion and take very good care of your husband, especially when he’s wrong!

Our family sends you our very best wishes. Young families are absolutely our best hope for the future, and keep working. My Social Security will someday depend directly upon you.

MTF on December 27, 2011 at 6:11 AM

As of today, I’m engaged!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWaLxFIVX1s

Darth Executor on December 27, 2011 at 6:41 AM

But kids in the past few decades have been made to feel as though they have to finish all of high school, get a college diploma, and be established in a career well into their late 20s or early 30s before they’re ready to get married.

TigerPaw on December 27, 2011 at 2:10 AM

Actually they don’t get married because they’d rather screw around during their youth. Nobody “made them” feel that way.

Darth Executor on December 27, 2011 at 6:42 AM

PatriotGal2257 on December 26, 2011 at 10:40 PM

ConArtist in Tampa on December 26, 2011 at 11:38 PM

Pancho on December 26, 2011 at 11:53 PM

Amazing feedback.

Conservative women seem to be picky for all the right reasons. And a good many of them are such natural mothers, lovers, caregivers and compatriots.

I don’t know if you women realize how much influence you have over so many other women. I bet there are girls with lib parents that have honed in on conservative role-models to mimic. I don’t think Sarah Palin is alone as a perceived conservative hottie. (Feminists take note of what a real man finds sexy – values, motherhood, family. The physical stuff is the easy part.)

I think more conservative women should play matchmaker. Thank you so much for your thoughtful replies.

Oh yeah. Romney / Santorum 2012

Capitalist Hog on December 27, 2011 at 7:04 AM

Congratulations Tina.

Donerik on December 27, 2011 at 7:30 AM

Tina@10.00pm
Im doing close to that, I’ve been trying to upset her about going out on new years. Just stirring the pot, all in fun!

angrymike on December 27, 2011 at 7:32 AM

Let’s face it, for liberalism to survive, no one can care about traditions. They have to tear down the institutions that made this country great in order to create their type of society and the two are not compatible.

bflat879 on December 27, 2011 at 7:34 AM

@Darth Executor:

I feel that this is more appropriate:

I sense a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced.

No, but seriously, congratulations and best wishes for an exemplary marriage. We need more of them in society. I’m at that age where a lot of my friends are getting to that point, if not already there. Me? Well…

PennsylvaniaPainTrain on December 27, 2011 at 8:30 AM

Marriage as an institution provides financial stability for the raising of children; it can also help to weather financial and societal hardship.
Why aren’t we seeing more marriage? Or is it happening and articles (propaganda) like this are what we’re getting?

mad scientist on December 27, 2011 at 8:37 AM

Congratulations, Tina!

Medved calls for “a more honest accounting” of the numbers among mainstream reporters and calls marriage “the desired, normative goal for most Americans.”

They’ve never done that on any other topic, why would they begin with marriage?

TugboatPhil on December 27, 2011 at 8:51 AM

I always cry at weddings and funerals, but moreso at weddings because at least at a funeral, the guy has some idea what’s going to happen to him.

In all seriousness, congratulations Tina!

JohnTant on December 27, 2011 at 9:03 AM

29Victor has it exactly right. Miss Manners says you say “Congratulations” to the man because he knows what is going to happen on the wedding night and “Best Wishes” to the woman because she doesn’t.

IdrilofGondolin on December 27, 2011 at 9:16 AM

Congratulations regarding pending nuptuals. I’m confident your father is very excited (for you). Surrogate fathers here feel the same.

exdeadhead on December 27, 2011 at 9:52 AM

err best wishes . . .

exdeadhead on December 27, 2011 at 9:54 AM

I have a question for women. How many of you still take your husbands name or will do in marriage? I’d love to hear personal thoughts on the issue.

Capitalist Hog on December 26, 2011 at 10:14 PM

Personally, I took my husband’s name because we were planning on having children and it just makes life easier. If I had married later in life I believe I would have kept my maiden name.

I just can’t stand hyphenated names. As Yoda said:

Do, or do not. There is no ‘hyphen.’

Fallon on December 27, 2011 at 10:04 AM

Tina, congrats. I’m sure you’ve heard this before, but I’m going to say it anyway. Marriage is hard! I don’t mean like hard work that you do on your job. It’s not hard like studying a subject you don’t care for. It’s not hard like being out shape and deciding you want to run a marathon. It’s hard for so many other reasons. I’ve been married for 17 years. I am greatly blessed and love my wife dearly. We struggle financially. For me marriage is hard because I can’t give her what she deserves. It is hard because to spite my best efforts, every month we have make tremendous sacrifices to make ends meet. It’s hard because she works far more hours than she would like to and can’t spend as much time with the kids as she desires. Marriage is hard not because it’s hard work. But because if forces you to see your flaws constantly. It never allows you to rest. It presses you on and makes you use capacities you never knew you had. Being a father is much the same. I want to protect my children, but I can’t always do that. And even if I could, would it really be best for them. It’s hard because when we go out to eat dinner, I have to accept glares from loud tables of adults that don’t like my children being half as loud as them. It’s hard because my image of throwing a ball with my son became a reality of raising a child with autism. Yet I wouldn’t change him for the world today. Need I talk about what happens to your love life with four children? How about when the vacations you could once afford become astronomically expensive for a family of six. How I had to give up a semester of student teaching to take a job with health insurance so my wife could battle cervical cancer. I never got to be a teacher, instead I work in sales-which I hate. But she has a clean bill of health and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Yet in job interviews I have to deal with idiots always asking me why I didn’t finish college.
Tina, I think marriages fail because so often someone in the marriage decides that’s it’s just too hard. Yes, they heard it was hard, but they didn’t know it was that hard.
Congrats Tina. But please understand, marriage is HARD! Yet everyday I get to wake up next to someone I love. And not everyone can say that.

mtucker5695 on December 27, 2011 at 10:06 AM

Incidentally, I’m proof of that (and thanks for indulging this revelation): As of today, I’m engaged!

All of my dreams are crushed! Oh well. Just as long as it isn’t Treacher I will survive. Meanwhile, over at Obamacare.

Has it occurred to anyone that the new rule allowing people to stay children until the age of 26 will disincentivise marriage?

NotCoach on December 27, 2011 at 10:38 AM

Tina:
Congratulations on your engagement. After almost 40 years of marriage I await the sweet release that only death can bring./
Semi-seriously, I do remember telling my Army buddy back then of my plans to wed and his advice to invest in a bitchin stereo system instead. Sigh.

swinia sutki on December 27, 2011 at 10:49 AM

Tina,
I hope that today, compared to the rest of the days of your lives, is the day you love your fiance the least.

cptacek on December 27, 2011 at 11:42 AM

Has it occurred to anyone that the new rule allowing people to stay children until the age of 26 will disincentivise marriage?

NotCoach on December 27, 2011 at 10:38 AM

Doesn’t matter. Two married people can be on their respective parents insurance.

cptacek on December 27, 2011 at 11:43 AM

Congratulations Tina Korbe!

And congratulations, Mr. Tina Korbe, too!

At the first opportunity, among all the other glass clinking, I will clink a glass to you.

… to think I wasn’t even going to check in this week.

Axe on December 27, 2011 at 11:48 AM

It is difficult to know at what moment love begins; it is less difficult to know it has begun. A thousand heralds proclaim it to the listening air, a thousand messengers betray it to the eye. Tone, act, attitude and look, the signals upon the countenance, the electric telegraph of touch – all these betray the yielding citadel before the word itself is uttered, which, like the key surrendered, opens every avenue and gate of entrance, and renders retreat impossible.

– Longfellow

Axe on December 27, 2011 at 12:17 PM

Mazeltov!

ModernConservative on December 27, 2011 at 12:41 PM

Capitalist Hog on December 27, 2011 at 7:04 AM

Wow, thank you for your kind words. [blush]

I’m going to go out on a tiny limb here and share with you how I used to think when I was in my late teens and 20s in the late 70s and early 80s, which to me falls squarely under the Young and Stupid heading. Basically, I fell under the spell of the Feminist arm of Liberal Lie for a time, despite having wonderful examples in my eminently sensible, hard-working, faithful, loving parents and an extended family of aunts, uncles and cousins. Outwardly, I was pretty much an average female, but inwardly, I was confused and conflicted as to what my place was in the world, what kind of woman I wanted to be, and so on. There was my traditional Catholic upbringing, and then there was the siren song of feminism, which was telling me that I “didn’t need a man to make me complete,” and that “all that traditional stuff is passe and doesn’t work in the modern world,” etc.

In an irony only to me, and which took me some time to realize [my mom's assertion of my stubbornness affirmed again!], my getting married was what reacquainted me with the traditional, conservative values I grew up with, and all the credit for that goes to my husband. I’m not sure he thinks he had all that much to do with it, but he did, and in such a subtle way that I look back, shake my head, and wonder to myself what in the hell was I thinking. So I guess you could say that I’m an unusually grateful conservative woman, because I now see how close I came to losing my way.

PatriotGal2257 on December 27, 2011 at 1:56 PM

Congratulations! Man, I’ve been to half a dozen weddings in the last year and now this…! Whoof! Must just be that season.

MelonCollie on December 27, 2011 at 4:10 PM

Exciting news, Tina. Best wishes!!

Armorica on December 27, 2011 at 5:05 PM

PatriotGal2257 on December 27, 2011 at 1:56 PM

You’ve add some nice thoughts to an already heartwarming thread.

Capitalist Hog on December 27, 2011 at 6:49 PM

Incidentally, I’m proof of that (and thanks for indulging this revelation): As of today, I’m engaged!

I’ve been married for four wonderful years (18 total), and thought I might offer this piece of unsolicited advice:

RUN! RUN! GET OUT WHILE THERE’S STILL HOPE!!!!!

Actually, after 18 years, I’d still marry her again. We actually renewed vows a few years ago, proving once again that I am much smarter than she is. After all, I got to marry her, while she got stuck with me.

So, congratulations, and may many years of wedded bliss (or at least wedded lack of bloodshed) be in your future.

arik1969 on December 27, 2011 at 8:16 PM

Capitalist Hog on December 27, 2011 at 6:49 PM

Thanks again. I really appreciate it. :)

PatriotGal2257 on December 27, 2011 at 8:44 PM

Congratulations!

Beo on December 28, 2011 at 9:58 AM

Comment pages: 1 2