Obama building a bunker at the White House?
posted at 4:05 pm on November 28, 2011 by Jazz Shaw
Time for another of those fun, speculative stories to while away the day. When politicians find themselves in trouble in the polls or want to dodge uncomfortable questions from the press, we often kid around, saying that they’ve been “secured at an undisclosed location” or they have “gone to the bunker.” But is Obama taking that phrase a bit too literally? Zeke Miller at Business Insider opens up that particular can of worms today.
For over two years, crews have torn up the North Lawn of the White House just outside the West Wing for what the General Services Administration calls a “utility upgrade.”
But it seems everyone — including people who work at the White House — think something else is going on.
One West Wing official told The New York Times last month that “It is security-related construction,” adding “Even we don’t know exactly what.”
Well, this certainly looks entertaining if nothing else. Take a glance at the BI picture and judge for yourself.
Photo credit: Charles Dharapak/AP Photo
What could it be? Sure, it may be the generic, “utility upgrade” but what fun would that be? More to the point, what does a man who already has two nuke-safe hardened bunkers need with a third? Is that where he keeps the real birth certificate? An apartment for one of his relatives? A place where he can finally relax with a darned cigarette without his wife or the media harping at him?
Your guesses are doubtless better than mine. Let ‘em fly.
Blowback
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Can you fit 18 holes underground or just the back nine?
NoDonkey on November 28, 2011 at 4:07 PM
Underground storage facility for GM Volt-mobiles that burned.
BobMbx on November 28, 2011 at 4:09 PM
Shovel ready!
gbear on November 28, 2011 at 4:10 PM
Obama needs a gigantic “bunker” so he has enough room to store the bunk he generates every day!!!
landlines on November 28, 2011 at 4:10 PM
WhoU4 on November 28, 2011 at 4:11 PM
Coops for all the chickens coming home to roost.
malclave on November 28, 2011 at 4:12 PM
Needs a place to move bodies. No more room under the bus.
Cecil on November 28, 2011 at 4:13 PM
After November 2012, this guy is going to start an Occupy White House movement. We are going to need a sheriffs writ to remove him.
Oil Can on November 28, 2011 at 4:13 PM
not deep enough
swimcoachmike on November 28, 2011 at 4:14 PM
Its the Mausoleum for all the jobs he “Created & Saved”.
catmman on November 28, 2011 at 4:14 PM
Obama found a seer stone and a map to golden tablets buried beneath the WH.
NotCoach on November 28, 2011 at 4:14 PM
Miniature Golf Course.
Seriously though whatever it is – how much is this costing us?
gophergirl on November 28, 2011 at 4:15 PM
Looks to be about the size of a small basketball arena…well, Obama did say that he was “digging in”…
right2bright on November 28, 2011 at 4:17 PM
It’s the Obama Monument: a visual metaphor for all his achievements to date.
Watch your step. The final design drawings explicitly call for no handrail.
TexasDan on November 28, 2011 at 4:18 PM
If it’s security for the White House, it doesn’t matter, since the most anyone can ever use it is 8 years…
right2bright on November 28, 2011 at 4:18 PM
Hey, every king needs a dungeon, otherwise where will he send his opponents who need to be silenced???
AverageJoe on November 28, 2011 at 4:18 PM
Finally, he can claim that he has created new jobs…
right2bright on November 28, 2011 at 4:19 PM
It’s a saltwater holding tank for the crawling seafood that Michelle Antoinette loves so much. Now she can just open a valve in her bedroom, press a button, and out shoots a live l0bster ready to be gnawed upon.
Bishop on November 28, 2011 at 4:19 PM
And the downfall parodies write themselves…
Gatsu on November 28, 2011 at 4:20 PM
It’s a new apartment for Barney Frank!
djtnt on November 28, 2011 at 4:20 PM
Walk in refrigerators for Michelle.
New “Obama Museum”.
Found world’s largest deposit of concentrated oil shale….Obama sealing it shut so no one can get to it.
Muslim wing of the White House – points towards Mecca.
albill on November 28, 2011 at 4:21 PM
As landlord, I’d like to know of and approve any improvements made to the house he’s
rentingsquatting in.Ditkaca on November 28, 2011 at 4:21 PM
At least we’ll know where he is so when he doesn’t leave, we’ll know where to dig.
gordo on November 28, 2011 at 4:21 PM
Man needs a place to eat his waffles.
ThePrez on November 28, 2011 at 4:21 PM
He needs a bigger place for his stash…you know–his private sum of money that he uses to pay for all this stuff.
Kataklysmic on November 28, 2011 at 4:22 PM
Man cave. Big, flat screen, pool table, bar. It’s cool. Hey, I’m not gonna vote for him either, but his finger’s on the button, he’s gotta de-stress from Michelle & the girls.
Little Boomer on November 28, 2011 at 4:22 PM
I can see him now trapped in his bunker screaming out Downfall-like Hitler rants.
Mark1971 on November 28, 2011 at 4:22 PM
Some geothermal, green energy, nonsense? It’ll be able to power two teleprompters in the case of a total power failure.
suburbanite on November 28, 2011 at 4:22 PM
A place to bury all the incriminating evidence?
Chip on November 28, 2011 at 4:22 PM
Stocking up election results?
right2bright on November 28, 2011 at 4:23 PM
Only if he’s accompanied by the TOTUS.
Chip on November 28, 2011 at 4:24 PM
I vote for a man cave where he and his homies can smoke, drink, and eat greasy food without “the wife” interfering.
tpitman on November 28, 2011 at 4:25 PM
Hmmmmmm…..almost big enough to contain his ego…
or Michelle’s @ss.
(just sayin’)
Tim_CA on November 28, 2011 at 4:26 PM
I’m seriously tired of the President being able to spend whatever money he wants and it being kept secret from us in the name of “security”.
MayBee on November 28, 2011 at 4:28 PM
I think he’s building a containment structure for the new White House Nukular Reactor.
WHNR, or Whiner…
karl9000 on November 28, 2011 at 4:29 PM
You don’t seriously expect Michelle and the girls to use the same bunker that cow Laura Bush and her girls used? Do You? It’s made out of concrete! I mean it might be all right for those hick Texans; they live on a RANCH for Pete’s sake. But Michelle and her girls are used to more refined surroundings.
Lily on November 28, 2011 at 4:29 PM
The president rarely, if ever, remains at the White House if there is hostile action taking place in and around Washington. For example, during 9-11, the White House was the last place they would have taken him. He and the Vice President would be kept at separate locations. That is simply what is done, and there’s no arguing with his security detail about matters of statutory law concerning his protection.
If I had to venture a guess, and judging from its location, I’d say it is for a larger “situation room.” That, or a bigger wine cellar.
manwithblackhat on November 28, 2011 at 4:29 PM
Spending. That’s the whole point.
forest on November 28, 2011 at 4:30 PM
It could be a pool, but there’s already one in the basement- under the old Press Briefing Room. (Reagan used to make jokes about the floor opening to deposit the White House Press Corps in same. Good times.)
Actually, I think it’s the foundation for the 200-foot tall statue of Himself that He intends to erect after He declares Himself President For Life.
(In addition to having His face carved on Mount Rushmore.)
He’s saving the Colossus of Rhodes-sized one (300 feet plus), to be put up in front of UN headquarters, for when He is proclaimed Ultimate Totality God Of Everything For The Rest of Eternity by all those smart people in the General Assembly.
/These days, /sarc/ is hard to tell from what passes for reality in Foggy Bottom.
cheers
eon
eon on November 28, 2011 at 4:31 PM
We’ll probably find out what this is in the next National Treasure movie.
Mark1971 on November 28, 2011 at 4:31 PM
What’s being buried under the White House?
Hope & Change, pal. Hope & Change.
Tantor on November 28, 2011 at 4:31 PM
New printing presses, to bail out the Euro.
Cheap, at 12 trillion.
Speakup on November 28, 2011 at 4:32 PM
The White House already has a bunker for the president and his top advisers, but there was an incident on 9/11 where some non-essentials were put in the hallway outside the bunker.
Maybe an expansion for the rest of the staff to use? Or a closer bunker for top members of Congress and the Supreme Court?
amerpundit on November 28, 2011 at 4:33 PM
Is that meant to keep Biden in control?
antisocial on November 28, 2011 at 4:34 PM
Maybe he is buying an underground shelter from the Vivos Society (www.terravivos.com). They are the fanciest ones I’ve seen, although their web site has a lot of New Age gobbledygook.
All Soylent Green jokes aside, I’ve never read what underground shelters do with the bodies of residents who die. Does anyone here know the real answer?
The former congressional bunker at the Greenbrier is a real trip; if you’re ever in the area, take time for the tour.
KyMouse on November 28, 2011 at 4:34 PM
No way!
Michelle’s @ss is way bigger than that bunker..
/ducks
JohnGalt23 on November 28, 2011 at 4:36 PM
He’s Planning to go full Idi Amin on us.
abobo on November 28, 2011 at 4:36 PM
Maybe they’ve installing the new solar panels under ground?
visions on November 28, 2011 at 4:36 PM
Michelle is wanting a trampoline added to her fitness routine. Underground supports are needed to protect nearby buildings from damage.
bopbottle on November 28, 2011 at 4:36 PM
That is the hole Obama started digging at the beginning of his term and he hasn’t stopped yet.
Or, the only other possibility. He’s going to cut carbon emissions by creating a shorter route to China so he can borrow more for his spending schemes.
chickasaw42 on November 28, 2011 at 4:37 PM
it’s the foundation for the future library of the “Stuff George Bush Did to Barack Obama To Make Him Fail”….
i kid.
ted c on November 28, 2011 at 4:39 PM
It’s either a mother-in-law apartment or a man cave where Barry and Reggie Love’s replacement can hang out.
Kevin71 on November 28, 2011 at 4:42 PM
He hired a crew to look for his approval ratings.
Bruce MacMahon on November 28, 2011 at 4:42 PM
Still looking for those other seven states…
sleepingiantsup on November 28, 2011 at 4:42 PM
Apparently I’m the only person that doesn’t think this is appropriate? Come on folks.
NoStoppingUs on November 28, 2011 at 4:43 PM
Duh. Crab people.
Axe on November 28, 2011 at 4:44 PM
Michelle’s stretch pant collection?
therealfranklin on November 28, 2011 at 4:44 PM
The picture looks like a faux-split rail fence, maybe part of a diorama of Obama-as-Lincoln, complete with log cabin! That picture will appear on the $1 billion dollar notes that will be issued when hyperinflation comes.
rhbandsp on November 28, 2011 at 4:45 PM
It’s the boom boom room for the Wed evening erf quakin booty shakin ghetto throw downs.
Alden Pyle on November 28, 2011 at 4:45 PM
Grrrr. He can put the bodies in the back yard just like everyone else. Freakin’ elitists.
Axe on November 28, 2011 at 4:46 PM
Between Obowma and Michelle…
… they needed a bigger septic tank.
Seven Percent Solution on November 28, 2011 at 4:46 PM
It’s where he’s hiding all the Lizard Men so he won’t be competing with them for independant voters next year.
If it was the size of a thimble it would be a place where he keeps all the damns he gives about America.
DrAllecon on November 28, 2011 at 4:47 PM
Ego overflow storage.
peski on November 28, 2011 at 4:47 PM
We’re gonna need a bigger bunker.
DrAllecon on November 28, 2011 at 4:48 PM
Mancave to escape that harridan he’s married to.
bloviator on November 28, 2011 at 4:50 PM
It was reported months ago that Obama along with Pelosi had redone and restocked the underground bunkers with food, water, etc…
When the economy collaspes and people are in the streets rioting, and trying to find food etc… this is where those on capital hill will be. It looks like Washington has prepared for whats ahead
Zcat on November 28, 2011 at 4:59 PM
It’s on the wrong side fo the complex to be a revamped visitors’ center, and at least the visible part is too shallow to be a bunker. Perhaps they’re expanding the Situation Room.
Steve Eggleston on November 28, 2011 at 5:01 PM
The new castle for the ‘king and queen’ bho and mo think they are? The nasty old wh just won’t do for those two?
L
letget on November 28, 2011 at 5:02 PM
They’re hunkering down in preparation for the hobbit attack.
J.E. Dyer on November 28, 2011 at 5:04 PM
A place to get away from mudear-in-law?
kingsjester on November 28, 2011 at 5:07 PM
If it is a bunker it can’t possibly be completed before the next election.
NotCoach on November 28, 2011 at 5:07 PM
Absentee ballots.
SIEU Headquarters.
Jimmy Hoffa Jr.
Dalai Lama meeting room.
Joe Biden debate prep room.
Michelle boob-belt storage facility.
Storage vault for the Solynda money.
GITMO North.
(That’s all I’ve got.)
BKeyser on November 28, 2011 at 5:12 PM
Ever heard of The Donner Party??
Think “Leg of Politician” in an Herb/Butter Chardonnay reduction.
Tim_CA on November 28, 2011 at 5:13 PM
One more:
Suggestion box.
(Now I’m done.)
BKeyser on November 28, 2011 at 5:15 PM
Frightening… I had the exact same thought, except for the bonus face on Mount Rushmore. That one is yours alone.
Fallon on November 28, 2011 at 5:16 PM
Well, if you go to Google Maps you can see the site.
There are some stacks of concrete pipe so maybe they are enlarging the sewer system to keep up with the large increase in bullsh!t that’s been flowing out of the White House over the past few years.
Rod on November 28, 2011 at 5:20 PM
Underground mosque… on a platform that can be suddenly raised when the time is right.
-
RalphyBoy on November 28, 2011 at 5:22 PM
Looks like a unicorn corral to me.
I heard each big donor to Baracky’s campaign can expect to get one.
fogw on November 28, 2011 at 5:23 PM
True but, they had the current bunker’s re-vamped and restocked earlier this year.
Zcat on November 28, 2011 at 5:26 PM
If it was a new bunker, there would be a lot of dirt being hauled away. Anyone see loads of dump trucks?
NNtrancer on November 28, 2011 at 5:29 PM
1. Mass grave for all of the would of, could of, should of.
2. New elevator shaft to china to bring in more borrowed cash.
3. Digging for Hope and Change, (may be a very deep hole)
Guest1.1 on November 28, 2011 at 5:30 PM
Underground Putting Green?
portlandon on November 28, 2011 at 5:30 PM
Underground Carriage House, for when we’re all back on horseback.
Myno on November 28, 2011 at 5:34 PM
It will be called “The National Redoubt”. Barry’s planning on putting up a fight after losing the 2012 elections. His plan is simple, “I’m not leaving!”
GarandFan on November 28, 2011 at 5:42 PM
I like big bunkers and I cannot lie…
hungrymongo on November 28, 2011 at 5:48 PM
Hmm… a new ‘command post’ for all his Kommissars.
CPT. Charles on November 28, 2011 at 5:49 PM
looks like he is building a coral for his Kobe Beef herd.
screwauger on November 28, 2011 at 6:00 PM
Underground basketball court.
OxyCon on November 28, 2011 at 6:00 PM
A bunker?
But, why?
Perhaps Obama has no intention of exiting the White House in 418 days?
Plans to hold out until his “army” of thugs, OWS occupiers and SEIU idiots can come to his rescue?
Plans to go out like the tinpot dictator he truly is?
He has unleashed his inner fascist?
Götterdämmerung time, anyone?
Can’t be a bunker for traditional usage.
After all, the entire world now respects us, to include the Arab street, no more al-Qaeda since Obama personally dispatched bin Laden, and ever since Obama got elected and got that Nobel prize and all, that sweet love from the rest of the world is just pouring in.
coldwarrior on November 28, 2011 at 6:02 PM
Maybe we could glean some info from the environmental impact statement? What? He’s exempt?
Figures.
I wonder how many endangered species this digging has killed off!!
MaggiePoo on November 28, 2011 at 6:06 PM
IIRC, Gadaffi had several of those scattered around and we all know how that whole deal turned out.
a capella on November 28, 2011 at 6:14 PM
Big barbecue pit. For future parties.
ncjetsfan on November 28, 2011 at 6:28 PM
Trying to outdo Saddam?
OldEnglish on November 28, 2011 at 6:32 PM
His place to get away from michelle and watch all those 60s and 70s sitcoms he grew up with…it’s his Archie Bunker….hahahahahaha!
RedLizard64 on November 28, 2011 at 6:32 PM
Shovel ready jobs. Dig a hole. Fill it in. It’ll be added to the Obama Jobs ‘success’ story.
FlatFoot on November 28, 2011 at 6:39 PM
Digging to China and breaking into the banks to get our money back.
hip shot on November 28, 2011 at 6:54 PM
You stole my response.
I guess that some day we will know what it is all about, but I am sure that it is costing the taxpayers megabucks.
SC.Charlie on November 28, 2011 at 7:06 PM
Occupy Wall Street Obama Voter Dumping Station.
/Michelle doesn’t like poopie on her lawn.
Key West Reader on November 28, 2011 at 7:16 PM
Tunnel to Kenya.
n0doz on November 28, 2011 at 7:18 PM
It might be the bunker for the dog and of course his flying buddy, Obama. Michelle might have told him that he was not hidding out in HER bunker, so go dig your own.
Maybe the old bunker doesn’t have all those niffty smart phone gadgets he needs to look smart, so he needs a new one that has all the toys.
It could be Hardened underground Helicopter pads. There is suppose to be two of these “constructions”, on either side of the WH so that makes sense.
It could also be he has no plans to leave the White House. Narcissist have a really hard time giving up power, and face it, what is more powerful than a president of the US; unless it is a president for life of the US. Of course there are certain members of Congress that will need to be rounded up and put someplace to be re-educated. Something along the lines of keep your friends close and your enemies closer.
Then again it might not be that sinister for a president of life. Lots of men build Mother in Law suites onto their houses. Or maybe Soros needs a place to crash out of sight when he comes around to to have those instructive meetings with his pocket president. Not a lot of difference between the two.
On a more serious note, maybe we are seeing the construction of an internet control center with its own servers and power supply. That little “test” we had recently might have been just the beginning of something new in our future.
Franklyn on November 28, 2011 at 7:20 PM
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