Obama blows India’s mind with insane teleprompter skills

posted at 6:49 pm on November 8, 2010 by Allahpundit

He’s like Moses coming down off Mt. Sinai with the two tablets. Except, instead of the Ten Commandments, on each one it says, “If you like your plan, you can keep you plan.”

President Obama used the electronic speech-displaying device Monday to deliver his 30-minute address to Indian lawmakers in the historic Central Hall of parliament, the same place where Britain relinquished power to a newly independent India in 1947. It was the first time a teleprompter had been used inside the chamber.

“It looks like a podium”, said one mystified lawmaker. “Where do they place the paper?” asked another.

In India, politicians generally speak extemporaneously or from notes or text written on paper. The common perception, explained lawmaker Sanjay Nirupam of Mumbai, is that the really good speakers don’t need to have text in front of them.

Regardless, lawmakers in the packed hall listened to Obama’s speech in mesmerized silence, punctuated by frequent applause.

One MP was so amazed, he removed a gold-and-pearl necklace he was wearing and offered it to Obama. And The One took it! If I recall correctly, the last time he had something tossed at him following an address was when Chris Matthews threw his underwear on stage after that big race speech in Philly a few years ago.

Here he is today before parliament calling for India to be given a permanent seat on the UN Security Council. I support him fully on the idea: It’s insane that the world’s biggest democracy doesn’t have a place at the table while a second-tier power like France does, and doubly so given that “the eastern world” is represented by autocracies in Russia and China. Two potential problems, though. First, if/when India is added, Pakistan’s going to demand some sort of permanent Muslim representation on the Council too. Presumably that would mean Indonesia as the world’s most populous majority-Muslim state, but who knows where UN insanity might lead once we’re adding members. If Middle Eastern Muslim states demand a seat too, the options range from bad (Jordan) to terrible (Saudi Arabia) to horrible (Iran). Second, rather than keep the number of permanent members at five and replace, say, France with India, no doubt all five current members will retain their seats and new nations will simply be added. The more that are added, the more difficult Security Council action will be; remember that any permanent member can torpedo a UNSC measure by vetoing it. Either the veto process will have to be reformed too or else it’s a recipe for eternal gridlock going forward, which may be a good thing in the long run insofar as it’ll undercut the UN’s legitimacy but promises to be fun for malefactors in the short run as the Security Council tries to deal with paralysis. Oh well.


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Comment pages: 1 2

This can be called a strategic fellatio if not for the excruciating and comical attempt. The One is recommending the country that gets easily blown away by fiduciary acknowledgement for an organization that is losing its relevance faster than France proving to be a waste of map space. And gets good press.

There has never been a US president who has been as friendly to India as W. He was the first (and I hope not the last) person to de-hyphenate India and Pakistan. Yet, HA readers will remember that idiot actor who (from the liberal hinterland of India, just like hollywood) was wearing a “Bush is a terrorist” t-shirt while the real terrorists were actually gunning down people about a mile away. Not to mention how a “libertarian” newspaper run by WSJ in India promoting free markets and assorted Ayn Rand stuff ended up *endorsing* Obama in 2008 despite acknowledging that their endorsement meant nothing because Indians did not get to vote.

Not to the One : Your team of market research monkeys identified an opportunity. But how about doing something creative? It is mind numbingly boring to watch you talk.

I will now hug my bottle of whisky and go hibernating never to comment again in HA.

sram on November 8, 2010 at 9:53 PM

the last time he had something tossed at him following an address was when Chris Matthews threw his underwear on stage after that big race speech in Philly a few years ago

Was Chrissies underwear wrapped around his hotel room key?

oldleprechaun on November 8, 2010 at 10:11 PM

If the news article is right about the necklace being worth “4 lakh”, that’s over nine thousand dollars.

JohnJ on November 8, 2010 at 7:46 PM

It would be surprising if it weren’t worth big dollars. Indians don’t play when it comes to their incredibly beautiful and extragavent jewelry; their goldsmithing is second to none.

tigerlily on November 8, 2010 at 10:19 PM

What Dear Reader not using any Slurpee analogies in India?

Caper29 on November 8, 2010 at 7:45 PM

No, but he did note “our shared values” when he reminded the dignitaries that their Indian Parliament was named after his favorite 70′s band, Parliament Funkadelic. He then gave a “shoutout” to Dr. Funkenstein, “hoping he was in the house”.

tigerlily on November 8, 2010 at 10:25 PM

Except, instead of the Ten Commandments, on each one it says, “If you like your plan, you can keep you plan.”

Got some spittle on the monitor. Hilarious, AP!

citrus on November 8, 2010 at 10:45 PM

The common perception, explained lawmaker Sanjay Nirupam of Mumbai, is that the really good speakers don’t need to have text in front of them.

Pwned! :D

Shiny_Tiara on November 8, 2010 at 11:35 PM

Rebar on November 8, 2010 at 7:00 PM

Obama, the gift that keeps on taking

If America is finally going to have to compete, why did Obama shell out 200 mil to help Brazil develop their off shore oil drilling, while he shut ours down?

If America is finally going to have to compete, why is he attempting to install the masochist version of cap and trade on America, when it is China expending unregulated belches as it manufactures goods to be sold in American stores?

If America is finally going to have to compete, why did Obama make a deal with a nation which allows $1.30 a day wages when our own businessmen would be arrested for doing the same here?

He is attempting to diminish America to make the other nations seem more equal. He calls it competition. I call it international affirmative action

Obama cannot bus Indians to our factories, but he surely can bus our factories to India. And open up the gas fields of Texas to the Chinese siphon to avoid another filthy cap and trade demerit on our soil.

The guy is like a blinking staph infection

entagor on November 9, 2010 at 1:10 AM

Here’s another comment which doesnt get printed on HA:

entagor on November 9, 2010 at 1:15 AM

I’ve got a message for Obama, India’s not getting rid of their nuclear wawpons as long as Pakistan has nuclear weapons. They know what it’s like to live with Muslim murderers as neighbors…

flameofjudah on November 9, 2010 at 1:27 AM

Why even make the speech then if you have to rely on a teleprompter? Just have Gibbs hand out the talking point memos at the front door and be done with it. If I was a member of that parliament I would have felt so insulted. Obviously these type of theatrics work in America very well with the 20 something obama-bot zombies, but in front of real adults?? – who is he kidding?

long_cat on November 9, 2010 at 1:27 AM

If I recall correctly, the last time he had something tossed at him following an address was when Chris Matthews threw his underwear on stage after that big race speech in Philly a few years ago.

-
This part reads like Allah is channeling Coulter!
-

RalphyBoy on November 9, 2010 at 3:01 AM

I think the Apologist-in-chief wants to give India the US seat on the council.

reaganaut on November 9, 2010 at 3:27 AM

The security council seats are (or were) based on military power. So add India — and drop the UK. Keeps the number at 5 — and makes a strong statement at the same time.

SunSword on November 9, 2010 at 7:01 AM

How long will it be before India gets tossed under the bus. Will that MP ask for the necklace back? Stay tuned to the next speech in As Baraks’ World Turns.

Kissmygrits on November 9, 2010 at 7:58 AM

If I recall correctly, the last time he had something tossed at him following an address was when Chris Matthews threw his underwear on stage after that big race speech in Philly a few years ago.

I remember someone throwing a book at him recently.

Disturb the Universe on November 9, 2010 at 8:02 AM

The common perception, explained lawmaker Sanjay Nirupam of Mumbai, is that the really good speakers don’t need to have text in front of them.

And it’s a correct perception. ODumbAss is just marketing hype.

dogsoldier on November 9, 2010 at 8:36 AM

The United Nations is a pure joke as it now is configured and would only be worse if India was put on the Security Council.

SC.Charlie on November 9, 2010 at 9:22 AM

And I thought he was elected for these skills.

TQM38a on November 9, 2010 at 9:36 AM

Obama blows India’s mind with insane teleprompter skills

(Headline FIXED)

landlines on November 9, 2010 at 10:37 AM

Maybe it went something like this.

Egfrow on November 9, 2010 at 11:17 AM

The more that are added, the more difficult Security Council action will be; remember that any permanent member can torpedo a UNSC measure by vetoing it. Either the veto process will have to be reformed too or else it’s a recipe for eternal gridlock going forward, which may be a good thing in the long run insofar as it’ll undercut the UN’s legitimacy but promises to be fun for malefactors in the short run as the Security Council tries to deal with paralysis.

The Security Council will never approve anything that both China and the United States don’t agree on. Since they rarely agree on ANYTHING, the Security Council is basically worthless.

Having India, the world’s most populous democracy, on the Security Council would be a GOOD thing in theory, but since India and China will rarely agree on anything, the Security Council would remain worthless.

But think of all the “saved or created” jobs for translators between English and Urdu! As they move to New York, that would enable Joe Biden and Christine O’Donnell to find employment at 7-11′s in Delaware!

Steve Z on November 9, 2010 at 11:28 AM

I am sure that there will be more excrement on the streets after his visit.

workingforpigs on November 9, 2010 at 12:20 PM

Anyone else believe this trip is to install Cap and Trade through the lame duck congress or the EPA?

Remember, Obowma claimed India and China were the roadblocks to passage last year with neither agreeing to participate. With lots of Obama goodies redistributed (why 200 businessmen on the trip?)to India to promote their “change” of position, combined with the lame duck congress……

dthorny on November 9, 2010 at 1:02 PM

“It looks like a podium”, said one mystified lawmaker. “Where do they place the paper?” asked another.

I’m so glad our POTUS was able to bring some light into this benighted country.

In India, politicians generally speak extemporaneously or from notes or text written on paper. The common perception, explained lawmaker Sanjay Nirupam of Mumbai, is that the really good speakers don’t need to have text in front of them.

Obama is NOT an extemporaneous speaker. He has to read what’s on his mind. Case closed.

abcurtis on November 9, 2010 at 1:04 PM

Compare Obowma’s speeches to John Roberts Supreme DCourt confirmation hearings, NO NOTES, NO TELEPROMPTER, nothing but his mind.

If I recall correctly, the last time he had something tossed at him following an address was when Chris Matthews threw his underwear on stage after that big race speech in Philly a few years ago

The line of the year!!!

The thrill is gone, Chris?

dthorny on November 9, 2010 at 1:10 PM

WOW – he can read………I wonder if he tied his own tie today….that is an awesome knot……DeweyWins on November 8, 2010 at 6:54 PM

His tie is a clip-on, symbolic of Obowma’s presidency: the hemorrhoid of the nation.

dthorny on November 9, 2010 at 1:25 PM

Whatever. Why not just let the Indians have our spot on the UN Security Council? While we’re at it, can the U.S. just drop out of that worthless organization entirely? They can quit having their meetings on our soil and relying on our money to fund it, too.

Sign of the Dollar on November 9, 2010 at 1:48 PM

An anonymous but reliable source stated Obama introduced himself using his Indian name: “Dances with Teleprompters”.

No word yet on how he responded to the news that he was thinking of the wrong kind of “Indians”.

Lone Star on November 9, 2010 at 4:07 PM

We should let every country have a permanent seat on the Security Council. It’s the clever way to eliminate the UN. We make it like Poland before the three partitions:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Partitions_of_Poland

thuja on November 9, 2010 at 6:13 PM

I bet this is a culture in which gifts are expected to be exchanged, not just given. Maybe the MP was hoping to receive the TOTUS in return for the gold necklace.

spudmom on November 9, 2010 at 6:37 PM

Is the teleprompter programmed with the “umms, “ahhhs”, “ya knows”?

spudmom on November 9, 2010 at 6:37 PM

Obowma gave a trillion or two dollars to India for the necklace, calls it “rupees for trinkets”.

dthorny on November 9, 2010 at 8:45 PM

HA Folks,
Obama wanted to take some pressure off of the US and transfer it on to China – by declaring that he supports India’s bid for a permanent seat in the UN Security Council, he leaves the Indian Govt with the painfully obvious fact that is staring every one in the face – China wont allow this to happen and American support for this bid is all hat and no cattle.

Any one who has half a brain knows that Obama is just playing this coy – he is now making the Chinese to come out and openly say what they think of the idea.

The Chinese hilariously added that they understood India’s “aspirations” and that they could have “discussions” about this – translation – We all know that this is to undercut Chinese power and we would be foolish to do so.

Indians who do understand power politics all realize that Obama was pulling a cheap stunt – i am sorry but what EXACTLY is the US going to do to ACT on its support for India’s bid ?

don’t worry, that was just a rhetorical question.

nagee76 on November 13, 2010 at 9:34 AM

Comment pages: 1 2