Portland D.A.: No charges to be filed against Al Gore over sex-assault accusations

posted at 7:21 pm on July 30, 2010 by Allahpundit

A relief, actually. I’m not yet ready to face the possibility that Data is capable of sexual assault.

First NASA says 2010 is the hottest year on record, now this. Best week for the Goracle evah? (Maybe not evah.)

In a memo to District Attorney Michael Schrunk, Senior Deputy District Attorney Don Rees said he recommended against pursuing the case for several reasons:

* Hagerty’s behavior immediately following the alleged assault seemed contradictory to her statements that she was afraid of Gore, the report said. Hagerty told police she called Gore as she was driving home from the hotel, advising him to drink extra water and “dream of red-headed women tonight,” the report states.

* Tests conducted on Hagerty’s pants, which she believed may have been stained with Gore’s semen, came back negative for seminal fluid.

* Police learned that Hagerty had failed a previous polygraph test.

* Hotel workers provided conflicting information about that evening…

* In addition, police said Hagerty failed to turn over medical records and other documents related to the case.

We already knew that she’d failed a polygraph (in fact, she volunteered that info to a reporter) but I hadn’t heard of the cooing about dreaming of red-headed women; makes me think we still don’t know the full story of what happened. Prosecutors also suspect that the Enquirer paid her to talk to them, which adds a revealing gloss to their subsequent scoop about two more masseurs claiming to have been assaulted by Gore. Exit question: Everyone satisfied?

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Headline: Sex Poodle Gets Off.

phreshone on July 30, 2010 at 7:23 PM

The Chakra sighs with relief…..

portlandon on July 30, 2010 at 7:23 PM

So Gore can release that chakra now.

Wethal on July 30, 2010 at 7:24 PM

So, does this mean no more Taiwanese animations?!?? ***sniff***

cthulhu on July 30, 2010 at 7:24 PM

Headline: Sex Poodle Gets Off.

phreshone on July 30, 2010 at 7:23 PM

Thanks, I needed that.

cthulhu on July 30, 2010 at 7:25 PM

It doesn’t matter that this is the hottest year on record…the earth has warmed and cooled over it’s 5 billion or whatever years of existence. No one debates that. What’s not true is that we’re causing it and unless we revert to cavemen lifestyles the earth with die.

Jim-Rose on July 30, 2010 at 7:27 PM

Headline: Sex Poodle Gets Off.
phreshone on July 30, 2010 at 7:23 PM

Admit it. You’ve been waiting a week to post that one. LOL.

tommyboy on July 30, 2010 at 7:28 PM

Let’s relish the fact that bizarre as it seems, this incident has severely damaged the bogus man-made ‘global warming’ nonsense. Who would have thought that it would end like this?

slickwillie2001 on July 30, 2010 at 7:28 PM

What gets me is that 3 charges would pop up, apparently independant of each other. My guess is that something odd happened in Portland, but the massage therapist was too flaky to limit her accusations to what actually did happen.

BuzzCrutcher on July 30, 2010 at 7:28 PM

Easy come easy go

Tony Soprano on July 30, 2010 at 7:28 PM

* Tests conducted on Hagerty’s pants, which she believed may have been stained with Gore’s semen, came back negative for seminal fluid.

Aha! AlGore is a woman!

portlandon on July 30, 2010 at 7:29 PM

First NASA says 2010 is the hottest year on record, now this.

Come on, man. Thousands of people are going to read that and not realize the politicization behind the numbers.

BadgerHawk on July 30, 2010 at 7:30 PM

Well,this means,Gore will move on to rape!!

canopfor on July 30, 2010 at 7:30 PM

So, Tipper took the SPCA’s advice and had her poodle neutered?

Lily on July 30, 2010 at 7:31 PM

Well, I guess it’s good that you have to have pretty solid evidence before you go accusing someone of something like that. I just have this icky feeling about him regardless. He’s creepy.

scalleywag on July 30, 2010 at 7:32 PM

“[L]ack of credible evidence.”

Story of Gore’s life…

Hog Wild on July 30, 2010 at 7:33 PM

Exit question: Everyone satisfied?
=====================================
I bet,ahem,Al Gore is,and Tipper,
not so much!!(sarc).

canopfor on July 30, 2010 at 7:34 PM

THE CHAKRA LIVES!

upinak on July 30, 2010 at 7:35 PM

Debaucherous Democrat Doin the Dirty Deed
Done Dirt Cheap!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

canopfor on July 30, 2010 at 7:36 PM

The evidence did not stand up to scrutiny.

ICBM on July 30, 2010 at 7:36 PM

Exit question: Everyone satisfied?

Oh yeah
We all need a smoke now

macncheez on July 30, 2010 at 7:36 PM

I dunno.. which is worse… Being accused of being a sexual poodle… or having the case dropped because nobody believes you can be a sexual poodle?

Skywise on July 30, 2010 at 7:37 PM

Easy come easy go. Tony Soprano on July 30, 2010 at 7:28 PM

…nah I won’t do it. I don’t want to get banned.

Dingbat63 on July 30, 2010 at 7:37 PM

The evidence did not stand up to scrutiny.

ICBM on July 30, 2010 at 7:36 PM

The inconvenient droop ?

macncheez on July 30, 2010 at 7:37 PM

Two more *masseurs*? So Al swings both ways?

Pervygrin on July 30, 2010 at 7:38 PM

canopfor on July 30, 2010 at 7:36 PM

You got Chakra… Port has Chakra.. But Gore has the biggest Chakra of them all!

eww

upinak on July 30, 2010 at 7:39 PM

Hagerty told police she called Gore as she was driving home from the hotel, advising him to drink extra water and “dream of red-headed women tonight,” the report states.

Has Al Gore been “hiding the decline” with this woman?

Electrongod on July 30, 2010 at 7:41 PM

Awww. The hockey stick is bent down.

Weight of Glory on July 30, 2010 at 7:41 PM

What ever happened to “its the seriousness of the charge”?

btw I believe the victim….as she was told to keep quiet because he’s the savior for global warming, and she spoke out anyway.

Conservative Voice on July 30, 2010 at 7:41 PM

Tests conducted on Hagerty’s pants, which she believed may have been stained with Gore’s semen, came back negative for seminal fluid.

So what was that stain ?

macncheez on July 30, 2010 at 7:43 PM

Tipper knows…

d1carter on July 30, 2010 at 7:44 PM

There’s something really strange about this whole story. If you had an unpleasant and unwanted experience with a man (er, a Gore) years ago and didn’t want to pursue it then, why bring it up again now? You’d think a person who would dredge up the past would be darn sure she’d have an airtight case or why bother?

scalleywag on July 30, 2010 at 7:44 PM

canopfor on July 30, 2010 at 7:36 PM
===============================
You got Chakra… Port has Chakra.. But Gore has the biggest Chakra of them all!

eww

upinak on July 30, 2010 at 7:39 PM

upinak:Tee-hee!:)
============================================

acdc-big balls

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_W-fIn2QZgg

canopfor on July 30, 2010 at 7:47 PM

So what was that stain ?

macncheez on July 30, 2010 at 7:43 PM

macncheez!!:)
=========================================================
Newsweek first to pass on Gore story
16 Jul 2010

(Molly Hagerty’s Pants Stained With Ranch Dressing or Something …)

was conducted after the announcement that he and his wife were separating, … integrity test CQ Politics: Sessions Uses Gibbs Tape to Inspire House GOP. …
politifi.com/…/Newsweek-first-to-pass-on-Gore-story-937941.html – United States – Cached

canopfor on July 30, 2010 at 7:51 PM

“[L]ack of credible evidence.”

How the Poodle must cringe when he hears those words; words that undermine his get-rich-quick carbon credits trading schemes.

ya2daup on July 30, 2010 at 8:07 PM

Well, at least we no longer have reason to believe that Al is nutty enough to use the phrase “Second Chakra” in private conversation.

Count to 10 on July 30, 2010 at 8:11 PM

The only ‘DNA test’ I am aware of on the pants was one that the victim paid for herself, $35. For that paltry sum all she likely got was a UV inspection for suspicious fluids. To my knowledge the police have never done a professional crime laboratory-level analysis of the pants.

slickwillie2001 on July 30, 2010 at 8:11 PM

First NASA says 2010 is the hottest year on record

Except in Southern Kaleefornia. Coldest July since FDR.

GarandFan on July 30, 2010 at 8:26 PM

To my knowledge the police have never done a professional crime laboratory-level analysis of the pants.
slickwillie2001 on July 30, 2010 at 8:11 PM

Yeh, but who you gonna get to draw that comparison sample?

OkieDoc on July 30, 2010 at 8:26 PM

Gore is, however, still guilty of being creepy as heck.

Dork B. on July 30, 2010 at 8:37 PM

Lack of evidence translates into…..how much will it take to get me out of trouble here!

capejasmine on July 30, 2010 at 8:39 PM

I love a happy ending.

sauropod on July 30, 2010 at 8:43 PM

Wonder how much money it cost him to buy his way out of this one.

Probably more than buying his masseuse a new Volt? Yes.

Probably more than inventing the internet? Yes.

Probably more than paying Tipper to take his tongue in her mouth? Yes.

Probably more than all his lawyers in the Florida recount? Yes.

Probably more than all the shrinks it took to restore his ostensible sanity after losing in 2004? Yes.

But probably less than flying this con artist to a global warming conference, and far far less that his cut out of cap-and-trade through the Chicago Climate Exchange.

petefrt on July 30, 2010 at 9:08 PM

It didn’t sound credible to me.

AnninCA on July 30, 2010 at 9:16 PM

Honestly, no matter who he is, it is pretty bad for any man to be accussed of this, all joking aside.

And, if in fact she is lying she should do time.

harry on July 30, 2010 at 9:51 PM

I still call shenanigans!

Fallon on July 30, 2010 at 9:57 PM

I wonder how many lefties that just don’t find this credible were ready to lock up the Duke lacrosse team and throw away the key? No apology yet from the 81 Duke professors either.

slickwillie2001 on July 30, 2010 at 10:07 PM

I’m not yet ready to face the possibility that Data is capable of sexual assault.

An insult to androids everywhere!

[L]ack of credible evidence.

That would never stop a Democrat DA if the accused were Republican.

American Elephant on July 30, 2010 at 10:12 PM

Algore, The Teflon Molesterer….

joe btfsplk on July 31, 2010 at 6:20 AM

Tipper also cites lack of evidence as the grounds for divorce.

viking01 on July 31, 2010 at 6:54 AM

Lack of credible evidence?

Of course nothing happened. What did, is that she puked all over him. I could puke just thinking about it.

Jayrae on July 31, 2010 at 7:26 AM

There are more women out there waiting to accuse Al “Wanna’ See My Carbon Footprint?” Gore of misdeeds.

albill on July 31, 2010 at 7:32 AM

I wonder how much “Hush” money that cost.

mixplix on July 31, 2010 at 9:55 AM

Some where in a lawyer’s office, Tipper said damn!

Kissmygrits on July 31, 2010 at 10:48 AM

Seems like we finally found a “controlling legal authority” but they took a pass. Al, you sneaky devil. Looks like your credibility is back up to zero.

Extrafishy on July 31, 2010 at 11:26 AM

[L]ack of credible evidence.

That would never stop a Democrat DA if the accused were Republican.

American Elephant on July 30, 2010 at 10:12 PM

Lack of credible evidence does not mean / does not equate with “nothing happened”.

It just means there’s no evidence (or not enough of it) located that a prosecutor can base a case on, or that, if located, a prosecutor wants to pursue (for whatever reasons).

Lack of credible evidence is not synonymous with “he didn’t do it,” either.

The “stained pants” issue is a big handicap, in that, Portland is right. Harms the lady’s credibility, though from her story as I read it, she never “swore” or stated affirmatively that it was Al Gore’s or Gore’s _____. She just said she noticed it “later” and saved it “in case” or, “if it could be” or “was”– something like that.

All I can add at this point is that Al Gore’s creepy.

Lourdes on July 31, 2010 at 3:58 PM

A moment of silence here to recall the tear-jerking moment by Al Gore associate, Bill Clinton:

“Ah did NOT have sex with that woman, Mizz Lewinsky!”

Finger wagging, face flushed, eyes into the camera, we all believed him.

For a while, anyway.

Lourdes on July 31, 2010 at 4:00 PM

Lourdes on July 31, 2010 at 3:58 PM

I know what “lack of credible evidence” means, thank you. As I said, however, a lack of credible evidence would never stop a Democrat DA from bringing charges against a Republican. (see Ronnie Earl for starters.)

American Elephant on August 3, 2010 at 3:13 AM