Video: Violent amnesty-shill revenge fantasy of the day
posted at 5:32 pm on May 5, 2010 by Allahpundit
A palate cleanser in honor of the fine Mexican holiday known to our president as “cinco de cuatro.” If you’re going to bathe in the cinematic blood of Nazi gringo border enforcers, at least be entertaining about it. This one is — thanks to an all-star cast, a bit of the ol’ ultraviolence, and the sort of schlock Mexploitation themes for which Robert Rodriguez is known and loved somewhat liked. There’s a special message for Arizonans tucked in at the beginning of the trailer too; as a fun thought experiment, imagine the media reaction if the film’s politics were flipped. Bonus points to Rodriguez for including a favorite mantra of the revanchist crowd, “We didn’t cross the border, the border crossed us.”
Meanwhile, an ESPN online poll with more than 80,000 votes shows 54 percent disapprove of the “Los Suns’s” amnesty gimmick in tonight’s game. (No matter: “Los Spurs” say they wished they could have done it too.) And a Rasmussen poll of Floridians shows 62 percent in favor of an Arizona-style law for their state. Exit quotation from Exurban Jon: “Here’s how the Suns can avoid being called hypocrites: Don’t man the arena gates & whoever sneaks in w/out a ticket gets to stay.” Please observe your official content warning and click the image to watch.
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Anyone else notice how the A2 flashhider on his AR is twisted 90 degrees to the right? Come on, guy, don’t you know how that gun is supposed to operate?
Beo on May 5, 2010 at 5:37 PM
This is how empires fall…
ninjapirate on May 5, 2010 at 5:37 PM
WTF?
Jaibones on May 5, 2010 at 5:39 PM
you know the NBA is stupid. Maybe someone out there with some money can put on a league to compete. BTW, if there were going to be true to the Latinos in opposing this measure, don’t you think they would have figured out that in spanish, Suns = Soles and Spurs = Espuelas
ConservativePartyNow on May 5, 2010 at 5:39 PM
I would laugh but how isnt this racist ?
William Amos on May 5, 2010 at 5:40 PM
QOTD
John the Libertarian on May 5, 2010 at 5:41 PM
CINCO DE CACA…..
Enforce our immigration laws NOW!
HornetSting on May 5, 2010 at 5:41 PM
I missed it! Are y’all messin with us Allah, or did he really say it??? I can believe it, I just want to see the quote. Too, too funny
Chewy the Lab on May 5, 2010 at 5:41 PM
Man, that movie has got a cavalcade of stars in it. Where were all those people when An American Carol was being made? Oh yeah, I forgot.
Kafir on May 5, 2010 at 5:42 PM
As someone esle said (but I really like), there should be no ID check when ordering beer at this game.
jukin on May 5, 2010 at 5:42 PM
Man I like that Jessica Alba!
tlynch001 on May 5, 2010 at 5:43 PM
I wonder if most US-born NBA players would even support LEGAL immigration if they really thought about it. White foreigners like Nash, Nowitzki, Gasol and Kirilenko are taking up nine figures of salary cap room that would otherwise go to Americans (for the most part to black Americans).
BuzzCrutcher on May 5, 2010 at 5:44 PM
Does America owe Mexico something?
BL@KBIRD on May 5, 2010 at 5:44 PM
That is such an awful idea for a movie I had to check to see if it is real. From IMDB:
pedestrian on May 5, 2010 at 5:45 PM
Yeah, their uneducated and poor ‘citizens’ back.
HornetSting on May 5, 2010 at 5:46 PM
With lomticks of tortillas!
The Ugly American on May 5, 2010 at 5:46 PM
An azz whuppin’? Hope we haven’t forgotten the Alamo.
TugboatPhil on May 5, 2010 at 5:48 PM
Poor Danny Trejo, he made his millions in Mexico’s rich film-making industry.
Inanemergencydial on May 5, 2010 at 5:48 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zHE96OcQHgU
ButterflyDragon on May 5, 2010 at 5:49 PM
Thanks for reminding me to add Valdez is Coming to my Netflix queue.
-
TwilightStruggler on May 5, 2010 at 5:50 PM
Ugh. That’s the Austin skyline in the background of the screen shot. This makes me ill.
Green Muse on May 5, 2010 at 5:50 PM
I’ll probably watch it. If its real.
El_Terrible on May 5, 2010 at 5:50 PM
….Is this a joke? Is that a Funny or Die thing? That can’t be a real movie right? How’d they get so-called respected actors like De Niro to show up for that mess! It has Lindsay Lohan in it, for Pete’s sake!
Emily M. on May 5, 2010 at 5:51 PM
Best comment on that site …
Gregor on May 5, 2010 at 5:51 PM
Yeah! the NBA is inflating the unemployment of basketball players by hiring foreigners to play for them instead of US Citizens
ConservativePartyNow on May 5, 2010 at 5:52 PM
Duncan Hunter and Tom Tancredo will be asking how many private screenings of this film they can buy if they buy in bulk?
RBMN on May 5, 2010 at 5:52 PM
She finally got a job! Yay! The economy must be on an upswing.
El_Terrible on May 5, 2010 at 5:52 PM
I didn’t realize Don Johnson was still alive…
Seven Percent Solution on May 5, 2010 at 5:52 PM
I’ll watch it.
Rightwingguy on May 5, 2010 at 5:53 PM
It’s going to make a lot of money, because dumb kids will pay to see this. It’s not cool to stand up for America when you are in high school or college.
100% Agree…
Oil Can on May 5, 2010 at 5:53 PM
Im surprized they didnt put a GW Bush clone up there to be assassinated.
William Amos on May 5, 2010 at 5:56 PM
So any “ballsy” filmmakers like Eli Roth or Harmony Korine want to bankroll my movie, “White Lightning,” where Dolph Lundgren uses his cybernetic implants to deport Mexicans and kill coyotes/drug lords, or are they only “ballsy” when it comes to hyper violent neo-snuff films and Dogme 95 garbage?
Good Solid B-Plus on May 5, 2010 at 5:56 PM
How entertaining, I take it that this film was made in America, so thank you Robert, for a Made in America Product:) They call that Capitalism – Free market. Should I spend my American money to see this flick? Oh he didn’t think about the Yankee’s being offended and not spending their $$$ to see his ART.
Reconquista is a socialist movement is Robert Rodriquez exploiting his comrades? He knows they will redistribute his wealth right? Well it’s Hollywood – It’s not called make believe for nothin.
The Reconquista Movement: Mexico’s Plan for the American Southwest
by Jerome R. Corsi and Jim Gilchrist
07/27/2006
Dr Evil on May 5, 2010 at 5:56 PM
Robert DeNiro a respected actor? You seem to be under the mistaken impression that the years 1991-2010 didn’t happen. De Niro *was* a respected actor, now he’s mainly a parody of himself.
See also: Pacino, Al.
Good Solid B-Plus on May 5, 2010 at 5:58 PM
I think…
…I just lost at least half my brain cells…
…especially when they threw Lindsay Lohan in… got nothin’, man… w-t-f.
Tell me this ain’t real.
KinleyArdal on May 5, 2010 at 5:59 PM
Jimmy Kimmel: I’d rather be a gerbil on Fire Island during the Vaseline Day Parade than see that movie.
mechkiller_k on May 5, 2010 at 6:00 PM
Why do the Europeans of Spanish descent get to claim some kind of “right” to Native American land with impunity and arrogance (“The border crossed us!”) while saying that the claims of other Europeans (English, Dutch, French, etc.) to the same conquered land is illegitimate?
Why do they presume that their brutal European ancestors’ theft is superior to the same theft by other Europeans?
Their ancestors’ forces lost the conquered area due to the struggle of another forces’ efforts, and the Hispanic people have no more “right” to the region than anyone else, except by conquest, as all land has been secured through history.
If they want to try to re-conquer it, they are welcome to pursue that effort.
But this fraudulent, pseudo-moralizing “highground” is obnoxious and infantile.
They are just one more group of European invaders, as any Indian tribe would attest.
And their treatment of the Native peoples was as horrific as any other European nation’s.
Their pretense that they are somehow equivalent to the original inhabitants is repulsive.
profitsbeard on May 5, 2010 at 6:04 PM
NOT a palate cleanser. I threw up a little in the back of my throat at one point, in fact. Something about pretty JA jumping on the lap of that Machete dude–who looks like he tried to shave with a running lawn mower at some point. Sheesh!
smellthecoffee on May 5, 2010 at 6:04 PM
Machete was a fake trailer for Tarantino’s Grindhouse films (Planet Terror). Machete was has been in development for a couple of years now, I don’t know why it hasn’t been released earlier. This would be a good movie to watch with your buddies and drink a few beers. These aren’t really meant to be taken seriously. Anyway here are some more trailers:
CONTENT WARNING!! NOT SAFE FOR AROUND WORK OR FAMILY!!!
Here is the original Machete trailer.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W8cCzltPD6Y
Werewolf Women of the SS
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M06e3PvPEmQ
nazo311 on May 5, 2010 at 6:04 PM
“Machete.” It was a funny fake movie trailer during the run of Tarrantino’s “Grind House” a few years ago. But as a full movie? And in THIS political climate. Bad mistake. Hollywood’s tin ear again.
Warner Todd Huston on May 5, 2010 at 6:04 PM
The scope’s height-over-bore is rediculous, as is the non free-floated barrel.
pseudonominus on May 5, 2010 at 6:06 PM
….what are you saying, that illegal aliens are really good at shaving with lawn mowers? RACIST!
HornetSting on May 5, 2010 at 6:08 PM
Allah, thanks for adding the link to the quote…I’d swear it wasn’t linked when I commented earlier, but maybe I missed it.
Chewy the Lab on May 5, 2010 at 6:08 PM
Agreed, and it’s not the first time Robert Rodriguez have teamed up for this kind of thing. Ever seen From Dusk Till Dawn?
It’s largely bad timing, but that plot subtext is pretty infuriating. Ugh. Sad.
MadisonConservative on May 5, 2010 at 6:09 PM
The fake Machete trailer from a few years back was funny. But what’s funny for 5 minutes is rarely funny for much longer. That, plus the current political climate and the irresistible chance to get political with this movie, dooms it to sucking.
brak on May 5, 2010 at 6:11 PM
Hey, dude….they already are.
pseudonominus on May 5, 2010 at 6:11 PM
On principle I NEVER watch or download movies, games, or music. I will make an exception for this movie. And advocate everybody I know does the same.
oddjob1138 on May 5, 2010 at 6:12 PM
Oh, MAN.
Tom Savini. Jessica Alba. Rose McGowan. Cheech Marin. Even Don Johnson???
Ugh. What a waste.
MadisonConservative on May 5, 2010 at 6:13 PM
Where is Speedy Gonzales running across the border, while being chased by Border Patrol Sylvester the Cat?
Good use of just another historically illiterate lefty quote.
“The border crossed us”.
Mexico never even slightly attempted to settle people in US territory. The only people even related to Mexico who were here, were Spanish missionaries failing to convert the Indians.
And if Mexico had kept US territory, it would be the same old sorry ass craphole most of Mexico is today, ruled by the same old crappy leaders.
Just less of the US to run to, for the poor unfortunate people are from there.
NoDonkey on May 5, 2010 at 6:14 PM
CBS claims Machete is scheduled for release September 3rd.
debg on May 5, 2010 at 6:14 PM
Good Solid B-Plus on May 5, 2010 at 5:58 PM
Agree – “Righteous Kill” has to be the worst movie I have ever seen. I kept watching it because it was so fascinatingly bad.
If I were Pacino or DeNiro, I would have bought it and burned it before it saw the light of day.
NoDonkey on May 5, 2010 at 6:16 PM
Fantasy? Not far from the reality down there it seems.
ronsfi on May 5, 2010 at 6:17 PM
I prefer ‘Broken Lizard’ movies to Rodriguez/Tarantino movies….now, I will make sure to BOYCOTT this crapola.
HornetSting on May 5, 2010 at 6:18 PM
It’s my mothers lucky Machete
GoodBoy on May 5, 2010 at 6:18 PM
What’s next? SHAFT against the Black Panthers?
I always enjoy that ‘the border crossed us’ crap. Funny, no one saying that looks like they were born prior to 1853.
GarandFan on May 5, 2010 at 6:22 PM
It’s targeting whites. Hating whitey is the mark of an enlightened mind, dontchaknow.
Crawford on May 5, 2010 at 6:23 PM
x1,000
thomashton on May 5, 2010 at 6:25 PM
Oh, wait!
Seven Percent Solution on May 5, 2010 at 6:26 PM
It’s nice to know directors who can’t cut a decent film to save their lives still have La Raza agitprop to fall back on.
Blacklake on May 5, 2010 at 6:27 PM
Wait…that’s genius. That’s utter GENIUS.
Protest the movie by sneaking in, and claim that the movie pushes the same message.
MadisonConservative on May 5, 2010 at 6:27 PM
You forgot Robert Dinero.
Yes, I did it on porpoise.
fossten on May 5, 2010 at 6:28 PM
Booooooring…
:)
Bee on May 5, 2010 at 6:29 PM
Cinco de Mayo…A Reminder to Celebrate LEGAL Immigration
We need to be very friendly with LEGAL immigrants to make the left’s argument that we are anti-immigrant or racist seem as ridiculous as it is.
dnlchisholm on May 5, 2010 at 6:33 PM
Danny Trejo.
Oldnuke on May 5, 2010 at 6:45 PM
Good.
Ultraviolent films like this, will only feed the movement to close the border down, and to kick illegals out.
Rebar on May 5, 2010 at 6:49 PM
Someone needs to go to the game, with a video camera, and try to get into the game without a ticket. I’m sure that would be full of so much awesome.
kagai on May 5, 2010 at 6:51 PM
Psst….
Aztlan’s not Aztec territory. It’s Pueblo, Comanche, Carrizo, Apache, Ute, Zuni, Pima, Navajo….
Sekhmet on May 5, 2010 at 6:51 PM
She’s a left-wing, skull-full-of-mush ditz. But, other than that, she’s great.
Richard Romano on May 5, 2010 at 7:00 PM
Yeah, kill Americans, hack them with machetes, blow their brains out while invading their country illegally. Just don’t spit on a Democrat congressman and call him a name or you’ll go to jail.
JellyToast on May 5, 2010 at 7:01 PM
Yeah, I’m gonna pay money to watch some leftard who hates me, lies about me, and fantasizes about killing me.
/SARC
PS Why is Seagal wearing a Mao suit? Isn’t he supposed to be Evil Capitalist Whitey in this movie?
Merovign on May 5, 2010 at 7:15 PM
Also, is it any wonder why Hollywood (as well as the South and North variants in Mexico and Canada) seems to sympathize with the terrorists? The “bad guy” is always the Old White Capitalist Republican who goes out and sets up the Brown Guy.
Face it, Hollywood is NOT filled to the brim with deep thinkers, “root causes” is a mantra, not an investigation.
Merovign on May 5, 2010 at 7:20 PM
This why there must not be amnesty. Nobody on this side of the border has the guts or brains to Americanize these people, the way the Ellis Island generations were, who were forced to learn English, recite Patrick Henry’s Give Me Liberty speech on commencement day and brainwashed into believing the greatest happiness to be had on this side of the hereafter was to call oneself an American Citizen. They’ll always be the foot soldiers of revanchists and political whores.
dhimwit on May 5, 2010 at 7:28 PM
Add to that “and turn back those we don’t see fit to allow the chance to become a citizen at all!”
We used to understand that – dreamy-eyed ‘huddled masses’ ideology aside – there was a limited amount of jobs, medical care and public funds available at any given time.
Dark-Star on May 5, 2010 at 7:33 PM
Lmao, that’s Austin in the background. So much silliness in such a small town.
bitsy on May 5, 2010 at 7:36 PM
Not sure why everyone is upset. This is NOT the movie you want to make to promote a cause. Sure the characters are cartoons, but the violence? How is this going to make illegal immigration any more palatable?
Sure the brain-deads will buy into it, but they are already lost so who cares?
kim roy on May 5, 2010 at 7:42 PM
“The border crossed us”
Yeah right, there were like 10000 mexicans on the wrong side of the border after the treaty was signed. Most of them stayed here ~3000 resettled to Mexico.
agmartin on May 5, 2010 at 7:44 PM
You know, illegal aliens are a rich resource we should be taking advantage of. Make the law very simple. Any person found to be in this country illegally will be used as an involuntary organ donor! Be green! Recycle!
Silentbrick on May 5, 2010 at 7:49 PM
Good idea…but would the recovered organs be worth anything?
Dark-Star on May 5, 2010 at 7:55 PM
Yeah, whenever Mexicans say they own Texas I always think of Six Flags Over Texas. It’s not just the name of an amusement park.
mrsmwp on May 5, 2010 at 8:08 PM
Wow, an all-star cast, and Lindsay Lohan too.
I really like Tarantino/Rodriguez movies, but they’re supposed to be brainless, over-the-top violent fun. Trying to inject politics into that makes me feel vaguely embarrassed for their cause.
Tanya on May 5, 2010 at 8:08 PM
You know, there is a really, really good Alninsky street-theatre idea in that thought.
Rule # whatever: Make the enemy live up to his own standards.
Film at 11.
Bruno Strozek on May 5, 2010 at 8:12 PM
Did they do it for amnesty? Or, because it’s Cinco de Mayo? I mean everyone adds a O’ to their name on St Paddy’s.
Blake on May 5, 2010 at 8:18 PM
It was a schlocky, sorta funny, gritty From Dusk Til Dawn/Devil’s Rejects kinda idea when it was just a fake trailer. Now that it’s a real movie, it really isn’t fun anymore.
In fact, for those of us who live on the border and the violence happens on a daily basis, it’s not so fun:
http://borderreporter.com/gallery/?nggpage=2
CPL 310 on May 5, 2010 at 8:28 PM
If they are serious about the line “we didn’t cross the border, the border crossed us” then I guess they are laying claim to the SW US and want a war with us. That tells you all you need to know about them.
echosyst on May 5, 2010 at 8:29 PM
And don’t forget to let them bumrush the concession stands and take whatever they want as well.
As for the movie, my respect for everyone included just dropped about 98%. I’ll also not hold my breath waiting for bedwetting leftists to decry the politically-oriented violence and assorted lawbreaking glorified in it.
Midas on May 5, 2010 at 8:39 PM
..Seems like Danny Trejo is living up to his “I’m gonna cut that vato” promise in Bubble Boy..
..too bad, because I like the guy and it would have been good to see him in a good good-guy role. But if that’s the way they wanna play it, then they f*cked with the wrong gringo.
The War Planner on May 5, 2010 at 8:44 PM
.
They probably thought they were going to do “research”
for Lohan’s next movie:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/film/2010/may/05/lindsay-lohan-linda-lovelace-deep-throat
mrt721 on May 5, 2010 at 8:58 PM
Wait… people still watch the NBA?
tcn on May 5, 2010 at 9:50 PM
Heh. I liked “A Clockwork Orange”.
BowHuntingTexas on May 5, 2010 at 10:16 PM
I know, I love Michelle Rodriguez, especially with the bikini top. :-(
Tim Burton on May 5, 2010 at 10:34 PM
Righteous Kill AKA Phoning It In
The Race Card on May 5, 2010 at 10:57 PM
You have got to be kidding me!!
canopfor on May 6, 2010 at 12:53 AM
TwilightStruggler on May 5, 2010 at 5:50 PM
ORrighty on May 6, 2010 at 12:57 AM
I remember a few years back Jessica Alba got caught in a flap by suggesting she was just an American rather than an ethnic-American. The girl is as whitebread as they come despite her rather nice blend. It was totally unfair of her critics but apparently Alba has changed her tune in response.
LOL…I guess I’m only bothered by this because I find her incredibly hot.
RAB on May 6, 2010 at 5:08 AM
Why oh why did they have Jessica Alba not wash her hair? Her hair looks NASTY in that trailer.
I’m personally looking forward to this but then again I love “From Dusk ’til Dawn”.
DethMetalCookieMonst on May 6, 2010 at 6:26 AM
“Cinco de Mayo” is not a Mexican holiday. It’s a holiday in Puebla. It’s like a Hallmark holiday here, or more like a beer distributer holiday. It’s also an opportunity for morons to out themselves as morons.
Akzed on May 6, 2010 at 8:52 AM
Gripping first hand testimonial on UNM Daily Lobo;
Terp Mole on May 6, 2010 at 1:36 PM