Video: Hey, did the Bible give us the name of the Antichrist?
posted at 9:45 pm on July 29, 2009 by Allahpundit
As a good little atheist, I’m going to go out on a limb and guess no — but don’t let that detract from the comic enjoyment of what you’re about to see. Believe it or not, this turd’s number six and climbing on YouTube’s “News & Politics” chart, which I guess means Birtherism is destined for a short shelf life as the most sensational conspiracy theory in modern politics.
Exit question: Does this mean the Rapture’s near? Because I haven’t even bought a gun yet.
Blowback
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He’s not the Antichrist. He hasn’t yet nor will he ever perform miracles as the Bible speaks of the Antichrist doing.
Livefreeordie on July 29, 2009 at 11:34 PM
You’ve got me in tears with that one.
But I do wish this thing didn’t appear. Obama does not need any more head-bloating recognition, even this accusation. He’s already the new definition of vainglorious. Now this. Grrrrr.
betsyz on July 29, 2009 at 11:34 PM
Yes, and the name of the Anti-Christ is…
Bud Selig.
ExUrbanKevin on July 29, 2009 at 11:35 PM
The anti-Christ will receive a head wound and miraculously recover. At least that’s what I’ve always been taught.
None of this matters. It’s all being controlled by the Bildebergers!
SouthernGent on July 29, 2009 at 11:35 PM
No.
The word “lightning” is separate from the words “fall” and “heaven”.
And “lightning” is the only word that the narrator “fixed” as a code word for Obama (his first name, Barrack).
“fall” and “heaven” are translated differently in Hebrew and don’t bear ANY resemblance to “Obama.”
Thus, the narrator is trying to get us to believe that there is some meaning to “I saw satan fall like Barack from heaven.”
Which, no matter how you cut it, doesn’t make any sense.
Religious_Zealot on July 29, 2009 at 11:36 PM
Now it all seems so clear…. Case Closed!
bigjacket on July 29, 2009 at 11:37 PM
Face it, though, and ridiculing Bible-believing Christians aside, there’s something very odd about Ogabe:
Never has an American president been so overtly hostile to the Jewish state of Israel.
Add that to the fact that he had no problem going to Catholic Notre Dame and brazenly pushing abortion.
And then we know that he and Michelle “haven’t chosen a church” to attend in Washington D.C.
He calls the Koran the Holy Koran.
(Does he give this same honor to the Holy Bible?)
As I said before, he may not be the Anti-Christ, but he may be his predecessor and he is evil.
Jenfidel on July 29, 2009 at 11:37 PM
A former pastor and a good friend, as well, spent a lot of his spare time recording these “authoritative” programs, and then step by step showing the lack of scholarship and ingorance of a lot of established fact to members of the parish every once in a while.
More recently History Channel and History Channel International have been producing a lot more of these shows.
I can see the misrepresentations, and surely you can…but what of the many many others who have never stopped to read digest and learn for themselves? Gee, it was on History Channel so it must be true. Same for National Geographic Channel lately.
coldwarrior on July 29, 2009 at 11:38 PM
I don’t know about that. Miraculous signs and wonders?
Miraculous sign:
Obama has managed to get on TV 28 out of every 24 hours, and I’m pretty sure that’s normally impossible.
Wonders:
I can’t help but wonder why anyone voted for him.
Daggett on July 29, 2009 at 11:38 PM
Good points! And, who can forget him talking about “my Muslim faith” and not even catching himself?
califcon on July 29, 2009 at 11:39 PM
He seems to have magically produced about $24 trillion in indebtedness with a wave of his hand. Close? /s
coldwarrior on July 29, 2009 at 11:39 PM
Ouch!
I hope all you Christians busted out your Strong’s Concordance and followed along. (Their what? said the heathens.)
;)
His references are correct, I’ll give him that.
baldilocks on July 29, 2009 at 11:40 PM
Great, now it won’t make sense to anyone.
TheMightyMonarch on July 29, 2009 at 11:41 PM
No, it does not. I’ve never said any of that, and yet you think I’m a Birther.
Jim Treacher on July 29, 2009 at 11:45 PM
+100
I spit out my beer laughing. Wife was not amused with mess.
Shipoopi
alohapundit on July 29, 2009 at 11:45 PM
I think people like to mock this because they don’t want it to be true, kind of like when someone laughs nervously, or whistling past a graveyard. Surely, there is nothing to this. Even a die hard conservative doesn’t want to be dead in 3 years, ergo the need for this to be nonsense.
Just as in everything in the Bible, it is subject to interpretation and debate about what it really means. All I know is that, and I’m not a Biblical scholar, but I’m pretty sure you couldn’t use the same technique to produce the name Barney Frank.
keep the change on July 29, 2009 at 11:46 PM
Thought for the day: Why isn’t America explicitly mentioned in Biblical prophecy?
Could it be because we’ve already been uh…extinguished?
Jenfidel on July 29, 2009 at 11:46 PM
Baraq O’bamaw?
So the anti-Christ is Irish?
Daggett on July 29, 2009 at 11:46 PM
‘Obama’ is not Arabic, but Luo. It means ‘bent’ or ‘crooked.’
baldilocks on July 29, 2009 at 11:47 PM
If we are still here on 22 December 2012, and Chalam Balam was wrong, among others,…hope we can pull this one out of the archives.
If not….c’est la vie.
coldwarrior on July 29, 2009 at 11:48 PM
“Bad theology” is a redundancy.
hicsuget on July 29, 2009 at 11:48 PM
Um, dude, uh, you didn’t know?
alohapundit on July 29, 2009 at 11:49 PM
Agreed. Also, the Jews are quicker than most. His approval rating in Israel is 4.5-5.0%. That’s exactly where it should be here. Absolutely. But, alas, the Jay walkers still roam.
betsyz on July 29, 2009 at 11:49 PM
In Luo, it means ‘crooked?’
Wow! Dad had him pegged from Day One. :-)
coldwarrior on July 29, 2009 at 11:49 PM
Ohhhhhh man. My mom is a devout catholic christian (not my fault AP) and at the same time a liberal bufoon that voted for obmabi aka satan.
Wait till I send her this video, it’s not just gonna twist her knickers, it’ll send her into a frenzy building a safe room in her house.
Am I mean, or what…
Spiritk9 on July 29, 2009 at 11:50 PM
Pardon me, but given the hell we’re living through right now, I just can’t find this topic laughable…
This is the first time in my life I’ve ever given serious thought to expatriating because I want to get away from my own government-it scares me to death on a daily basis.
I don’t recognize my country anymore.
How did President Bush hold the demon at bay for so long?
Jenfidel on July 29, 2009 at 11:50 PM
I’m not especially religious, but that is interesting.
And hey, evil is nothing if not persuasive.
commenter on July 29, 2009 at 11:52 PM
Yes it does. :)
Come on, Christians! Tell me that at least one of you pulled out your Strong’s and followed along…or at least tell me that you know what a Strong’s is.
baldilocks on July 29, 2009 at 11:56 PM
These Youtube crackpots got it all wrong!
Obama is the anti-Christ that Nostradamus predicted…MABUS!
When you take the last two letters of ObaMA’s last name and combine them with all the people he has thrown under the BUS, you get MA-BUS.
OxyCon on July 29, 2009 at 11:58 PM
Has anyone asked his barber? Surely he’s seen the “mark” on his pointy little head!
jdkchem on July 29, 2009 at 11:59 PM
666
Seems appropriate!
jdkchem on July 30, 2009 at 12:03 AM
I’m sure most of you have seen these already, but here are the links anyway. Obama speech played backward:
Serve satan
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-TMKUea87E
Thank you satan
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jqALdkTArqs
Daggett on July 30, 2009 at 12:06 AM
When anyone says, “I know the name of the Antichrist,” you can take it to the bank that they do not know the name of the Antichrist!
When someone says, “Jesus Christ will return to earth and usher in the Kingdom of God in 2014 AD,” then know for sure, 2014 will definitely be the year He will not return.
Any other questions you got, Allah?
Joe Pyne on July 30, 2009 at 12:08 AM
this meme won’t die, and with good reason; the guy is a menace.
and don’t forget that the illinois state lottery winning number on nov. 5th was 6-6-6!
homesickamerican on July 30, 2009 at 12:13 AM
Go for the Mossberg 590. Holds 9 rounds, and if you use the minishells, “it goes to 11″. That’s better, innit?
EyeSurgeon on July 30, 2009 at 12:13 AM
Yes, I know what Strong’s Concordance is (there’s one on the bookshelves about 10 feet away from me) and no, it’s not out right now.
The Bible is pretty clear that all our predictions and guesses about the Rapture, AntiChrist, etc. are wrong and will be wrong.
Well, except for the part about the White Sox winning the World Series. That’s a clear sign that the End Times are upon us.
ExUrbanKevin on July 30, 2009 at 12:14 AM
You laugh, you cry from Jan. 20, 2009. Mostly cry.
That’s why this little segment is so just. We’ve just been catapulted into a new America. A country, by description, that is barely recognizable. AND, to add insult to injury,
orchestrated by the most impossibly bad, incoherent, sloppy, lying, individual imaginable. But it happened.
More injury: The video earlier of Matt Laurer (sp?) interviewing Michelle Malkin. A lot of people have entered comments on this. My reaction: Matt, seemed to me, baffled and perplexed that ANYONE could find fault with Obama and how things have gone down. I thought that he came across as the perfect example of the typical,stupendously stupid Obama voter,without remorse or a clue.
betsyz on July 30, 2009 at 12:14 AM
Then again…lightning is crooked, right? And Guz’ was a language spoken in what is now generally Ethiopia up to the lower Nile and southward into the highlands of present-day Kenya. So, from an etymologic perspective, the two languages, Guz’, hence Hebronic, hence Aramaic, and Luo may have a bit of a shared lexicon.
coldwarrior on July 30, 2009 at 12:14 AM
Oh where is Scottie when I need to be beamed up?
BTW I don’t think the anti-Christ and Satan are presented as the same thing in the Bible.
Thanks AP for the heads-up. It brings back memories of that demon in the drape back in 1992(?), in the debate between Al Gore and Bill Bradley… ah the good old days… I wish I still had a copy of that photo.
alice on July 30, 2009 at 12:15 AM
RACIST!
WisCon on July 30, 2009 at 12:17 AM
When I started watching the vid and saw that he was going to use it, I when and got mine from the other room
Of course. I just wanted to see if someone was willing to refute him on the right terms rather than by using some of the illogic seen on this thread or by using ridicule.
baldilocks on July 30, 2009 at 12:19 AM
It’s all Greek to me.
baldilocks on July 30, 2009 at 12:20 AM
Wouldn’t that be Russian?
Ooops, another etymological connection…Russian, Cyrillic, St. Cyril being a Greek…OK…it’s all Greek. :-)
As to Strong’s…selectively pulling words out to show how one or two words seem to match, well, why not pull out the entire passage, and work it word for word? That’s where they lost me as to any sort of serious scholarship.
I still am hedging my bets on the katuns of Chalam Balam…those at least have a fixable date and time.
coldwarrior on July 30, 2009 at 12:24 AM
You know whats really creepy?
After watching the video on Youtube, I decided to check out some of the related ones and I gotta say the ones where they play Obama saying “Yes we can” backwards and hearing it is “Thank you Satan” are creepy.
With me it’s probably because I already get creeped out simply from the sound of Obama’s voice repetitively saying “Yes we can” and hearing his millions of lemmings mindlessly repeating it.
OxyCon on July 30, 2009 at 12:24 AM
well, since the antichrist rules from a city referred to as babylon, I think we can safely assume that las vegas will become the nation’s new capital.
jollycynic on July 30, 2009 at 12:25 AM
Who’da thunk it?????
ultracon on July 30, 2009 at 12:25 AM
I know Hebrew, and like that well-known Palestinian, Casey Kasem, would say, he is “reaching for the stars”.
As a single example, “Heavens” in Hebrew is shamayim, not bama, or whatever he’s going on about. And “waw” is pronounced as “Vav”, not “o” or “u”. It means “and”, just stick “v’” in front of a noun and you have an “and”.
In fact, I don’t know what the hell he’s talking about, and no, Aramaic is not “the most ancient form of Hebrew”, anymore than Cockney is the most ancient form of English. in fact, Aramaic was the colloquial language in the days of Jesus, as that wonderful philosemite Mel Gibson would tell us.
Still, I respect both his sincerity and clear diction.
TexasJew on July 30, 2009 at 12:26 AM
I didn’t bust out my Strongs (it would be easier to use one of several web sites, anywa), but I would have looked up his grammar (the O/U-thing) if my Hebrew books weren’t packed away in the garage somewhere.
Daggett on July 30, 2009 at 12:30 AM
Used to be a super edgy club in D.C. where all the trendy politicos used to hang out, especially for New Years parties called Babylon…over on F St NW…I believe it is closed now.
Was a lot more of a Dem yuppie place than a GOP hangout.
.
coldwarrior on July 30, 2009 at 12:30 AM
Yes.
http://sollogs.com/news/satanbarack.html
Interestingly, the “Greek” verse of Luke 10:18 does not contain an actual Greek word to translate into “Fall”. The Greek word translated as “Fall” appears to be a rare form of a Hebrew word for “transgressions”. So, the words of Jesus in this verse probably refer to heavenly transgressions.
Mr Purple on July 30, 2009 at 12:30 AM
40 years ago, I had to listen to people run the Beatle’s “Abbey Road” and the “White Album” backwards on turntables to hear something like “I buried Paul” or “turn me on, dead man”.
And here it is, again!
TexasJew on July 30, 2009 at 12:31 AM
LOL!
I suspected the O/U thing was wrong. Thanks for the info.
Daggett on July 30, 2009 at 12:31 AM
What a moron!
Aramaic is not “the most ancient form of Hebrew.” Aramaic is Aramaic, not Hebrew. Sheesh. And BTW, it didn’t become the lingua franca until the Babylonian exile.
microfiction on July 30, 2009 at 12:32 AM
1) The tape says the most ancient version of Hebrew was Aramaic–FALSE. The language of the Israelites from Judges to the destruction of the first temple was primarily ancient Hebrew. Aramaic became dominant around 3-400 BCE
2)The Hebrew Word for lightning is Barak, Ehud Barak Defense Minister of Israel’s last name is that Barak. Obama’s first name is Barack like the Hebrew work Baruch (The difference in Hebrew is the CH, that funny “winding up for a loogy sound in words like Tuchas that only Jews can pronounce) Baruch in Hebrew means blessed, it is also the word for blessed in Arabic and, as Andy Levy taught me, Swahili.
3)The Name of the Anti Christ is in the Bible, its not Barack but if you read Deuteronomy Chapter 18 verses 10 and 11 there is a prohibition against witchcraft, an obvious reference to Nancy Pelosi.
The_Lid on July 30, 2009 at 12:33 AM
Another miracle: He turned a Bush into whine.
Daggett on July 30, 2009 at 12:33 AM
Laugh this off all you want, but I don’t need this video to recognize he’s at least doing a damn good impersonation. Almost two years ago actually — and this coming from someone not particularly religious — I proclaimed to close family and friends that if he was elected then he’s probably the anti-christ. I don’t know if I think that now (after the fact saying I would be convinced) but the fact that many are thinking along these lines is chilling enough to the damage he’s doing. Anti-Christ or not, I DON’T think it’s a stretch at all to say he is evil.
jjraines on July 30, 2009 at 12:34 AM
This night has brought out what I have always appreciated about this site. Most commentators are thoughtful, intelligent, but most of all, amusing and hilarious, with their zinger one-liners; the one quality that is vacant and absent from the left side. And all this time, after Obama WON!!!, I thought that these lefties would be soooo cheerful, so full of life and humor, so robust with their
now realized dreams. Somehow, this hasn’t appeared.It’s more and more bile and hatred, almost like they’ll never, ever be pleased. What’s the end game here, ’cause I don’t get it.
betsyz on July 30, 2009 at 12:34 AM
That’s Strong’s is for. However, the word for ‘Heavens/Heights’ is ‘samayim’ (8064) in Isaiah 14:12 and ‘bama’ (1116) in Isaiah 14:14. That latter doesn’t seem to match, it matches. Not sayin’ that he’s correct, just sayin’.
baldilocks on July 30, 2009 at 12:36 AM
Just saw this. Laughed. You are a peach.
betsyz on July 30, 2009 at 12:36 AM
Oh, aside from bringing forth whine from a Bush, he also raised the dead.
Well, at least long enough to vote, anyway.
Daggett on July 30, 2009 at 12:37 AM
Allah,
I have a Kahr 9mm. You can have mine if the rapture happens…I’m not gonna be here to need it.
Ltlgeneral64 on July 30, 2009 at 12:38 AM
That’s what Strong’s is for.
baldilocks on July 30, 2009 at 12:38 AM
Word for word substitution/translation may not actually convey meaning…just a translation of terms.
Contextual language, as are a good number of the older languages, requires a bit more than a simple word substitution to attain meaning. Which is why translating the entire passage conveys a more accurate meaning than simply looking to substitute one or two words from within a passage.
coldwarrior on July 30, 2009 at 12:41 AM
A couple thoughts – yes, I am a Christian and I know what Strong’s is, and no, I didn’t whip it out to follow along. I might be better informed if I had. :)
Seriously, though, I am highly skeptical that these verses would indicate the precise name of anyone living 2,000 years in the future. Prophecy generally doesn’t work that way. This strikes me as the kind of contortion that numerologists go through to prove…well, whatever they want to prove.
But, this video should give us pause to stop and think about the many more concrete and clear indications that the Bible gives us about future ‘end times’ events, many of which have come about in recent history. Things like Israel being established as a nation, a Russian-Iranian alliance forming for the first time in world history, miraculous conversions of Muslims to Christianity happening on a mass scale (no, you don’t hear about this in the media, but it’s happening on the ground by the thousands), Israel being increasingly isolated (another commenter pointed out that the entire Obama administration is very anti-Israel, and a definite coldness has fallen between the U.S. and our long-time ally), rising anti-Semitism all over the world, Israel discovering a huge new source of oil and natural gas that will likely propel it to incredible new wealth, and many more.
This particular video may be a little wacked out, but I would encourage any proper skeptic to look at the evidence before shrugging the general concept off as religious nonsense.
2cents on July 30, 2009 at 12:44 AM
Not to get all linguist-y here, but “shamayim” (Heavens) comes from the earlier Akkadian language, as does the word “mayim” means Water(s), so the Heavens are above the Water (in which the Babylonian Goddess Tiamhet is buried as T’hom (The Deep, as in p’nai t’hom – “the face of the deep”)), like the Babylonian Creation, which is the first creation in mentioned in Genesis, before you get that strange second Creation shortly afterwards, which is the Canaanite Creation.
Yes, and “I buried Paul”!
TexasJew on July 30, 2009 at 12:47 AM
Anti-Christ comes from the old Roman empire. Sorry BHO, it’s not you.
BHO will have to explain why he voted so children who miraculously survive abortion should be left to die. The killing of innocents is an abomination in God’s eyes.
I’m looking forward to the Rapture too. I’ve got a bunch of guns and Bibles that I’m clinging to. I won’t be needing them at that point so feel free to loot them from my empty house.
Mojave Mark on July 30, 2009 at 12:48 AM
OK first I would like to make the comment that this guy has no idea what he is talking about to start with Aramaic is not a ancient form of Hebrew as it is considered the sister language to Hebrew. Furthermore, Jesus spoke Hebrew, Aramaic and Greek. His main form of communication would have been Greek since he was by trade, a carpenter who had to speak the language of the common man.
Anyway, the Hebrew word 1299 is in fact baraq, but it means ‘to flash (of lightning’ — he even gets that wrong. Furthermore, bamah (Strong’s 1116 which he uses in Is. 14:14) has nothing to do with a ‘high and sacred place’ – it is merely the Hebrew word for ‘heights’.
This man is doing the same thing Tim LaHaye has been doing for years. They play on current day fears without any scholarly exegesis or theological input or oversight.
If anyone is really wanting to learn about this, then do yourself a favor (both spiritually and educationally) and find yourself a commentary written by an expert in the subject (Dr. Bock’s Commentary on Luke is superb).
zenodaddy on July 30, 2009 at 12:49 AM
There he goes again. (RWR)
Luka on July 30, 2009 at 12:49 AM
Its not their “bad” theology or scholarship, they are doing that on purpose to lead people away from God.
cjs1943 on July 30, 2009 at 12:49 AM
Thanks for explaning that for the folks, Tex. I would also add that “Lucifer” is not a synonym for Satan, but used sardonically to describe Nebuchadnezzar, the tyrant of Babylon and his rotten kingdom:
So yeah, Obama can be compared to that pagan jackass Nebuchadnezzar: God-complex? Check. Destroying the land? Check. Slaying people? Babies are dying on schedule, still working on the elderly. Brood of evildoers? It’s the Chicago way.
TMK on July 30, 2009 at 12:50 AM
In the morning I take a barack, then I wipe my obama…
fitzsweetpea on July 30, 2009 at 12:50 AM
Obama may turn out to be the worst president we’ve ever had, but I’m reasonably certain he’s not the Antichrist. And in any case, that’s what the insane leftist conspiracy theorists called Bush for the whole of his presidency: I’m NOT about to sink to their level.
My hubby and I have discussed before that the Antichrist may be something or someone a lot less simple and obvious than a popular world leader. Regardless, predetermined Biblical events are beyond my power to change, so I’d rather focus on living the best life I can and leave the Apocalypse up to God.
In short, Revelations is one of the most boring books in the Bible. SNORE. Give me Genesis or Romans any day. ;)
Animator Girl on July 30, 2009 at 12:51 AM
Well, folks…going to head off to bed.
Try to figure out if I am going to be part of the Rapture or merely a disgruntled spectator…such is the life I have led. Really should have listened to Amanda that cute little Christian girl way back then…just leave the good wine in a safe place for me, will ya?
:-)
coldwarrior on July 30, 2009 at 12:53 AM
After reading the thread, I think I can summarize.
While he is not the Anti-Christ, he is a pretty good facsimile. He is a false prophet and promotes himself as a Messiah. He adores evil tyrants and is repulsed by freedom.
Oh, and he is the #1 Anti-American.
DeathB4Tyranny on July 30, 2009 at 12:54 AM
The final Antichrist will have more to commend him than a lackluster partial term in the Senate and a presidency that makes the Carter years look good.
jazz_piano on July 30, 2009 at 12:57 AM
Like this?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EbVKWCpNFhY
anuts on July 30, 2009 at 12:57 AM
My question has always been, why isn’t the “west” ever mentioned? Either directly or indirectly. The “north” sure is identified. We have come and gone by the time the Antichrist appears.
cjs1943 on July 30, 2009 at 12:59 AM
Strong’s does both–translates and gives context. It’s topic I do know a little about.
:)
Nighty night, cold one!
baldilocks on July 30, 2009 at 1:03 AM
St. Augustine seemed to think that the antichrist isn’t a real person, but a symbol, perhaps of men glorifying themselves. I think I may agree.
ableushoe on July 30, 2009 at 1:04 AM
Is he an anti-Christ? Absolutely, but is he THE Anti-Christ? No.
Tim Burton on July 30, 2009 at 1:04 AM
Getting Linguist-y is okay by me. You’re among kindred spirits. :)
baldilocks on July 30, 2009 at 1:06 AM
Does it matter what we call the fictional character?
thphilli on July 30, 2009 at 1:07 AM
The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn’t exist
-Virgil Kent “The Usual Suspects”
GREAT FLICK!
alohapundit on July 30, 2009 at 1:09 AM
The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn’t exist
-Virgil Kent “The Usual Suspects”
GREAT FLICK!
alohapundit on July 30, 2009 at 1:10 AM
The final Antichrist will have more to commend him than a lackluster partial term in the Senate and a presidency that makes the Carter years look good.
jazz_piano on July 30, 2009 at 12:57 AM
Well, that gaave me an idea for a new sitcom plot:
Barry Oobama, the nebbishy AntiChrist.
Set in suburban Chicago, after falling to earth from Hell, the young AntiChrist rents a house from a nice ethnic family with a smartass little daughter and comical neighbors and when he tries to destroy the world with unspeakable evil, hilarity ensues!
We’ll call it “Anti Matters”.
TexasJew on July 30, 2009 at 1:10 AM
Dude, Seinfeld II? I like it!
alohapundit on July 30, 2009 at 1:11 AM
He reports, I decide. I decide that at this point in time, no, Barackus Caesar is not the antichrist. Though, I reserve the right to change my mind in the future. After all, Satan is the greatest of deceiver’s in all of time, and Satan’s greatest feat of all has been to convince vast numbers of mortal men and women to convince themselve’s that niether he, or the father, nor heaven itself even exist.
You don’t own even one firearm? Wow.
Dang dude. Do you know how to change the oil in your car, change a tire, or drive a stickshift?
Meh. Don’t sweat it. A firearm will do you no good at rapture anyway… nor will changing your oil, a tire, or driving a stickshift.
SilverStar830 on July 30, 2009 at 1:15 AM
Dude, Seinfeld II? I like it!
alohapundit on July 30, 2009 at 1:11 AM
Or we can just do a spinoff starring the greatest evil mastermind in history, Newman.
We’ll call it “Going Postal”
TexasJew on July 30, 2009 at 1:15 AM
Let me control the translation and pick my source words from multiple books of the bible both New and Old testament like this bozo did, and I’ll give you Jesus endorsing Chili Cheese Fritos, in his own words.
What a buncha mularkey.
Barneys Bullet on July 30, 2009 at 1:16 AM
Wait for the Dow to trade over 10k after the GDP numbers come out.
Bill C on July 30, 2009 at 1:23 AM
“Let me control the translation and pick my source words from multiple books of the bible both New and Old testament like this bozo did, and I’ll give you Jesus endorsing Chili Cheese Fritos, in his own words.”
WWJD – eat a big heavenly bowl of Crunchy Chili Cheese Dorito chips, and wash it down with delicious Red Heifer cherry soda.
It’s Oooobmalicious!
TexasJew on July 30, 2009 at 1:23 AM
/facepalm at this entire thread
doodleduh on July 30, 2009 at 1:37 AM
It’s even better than that! Obama is tight with a former governor, Ray Mabus, and has named him his Secretary of the Navy.
CUE THE SPOOKY MUSIC. LOL
capitalist piglet on July 30, 2009 at 1:38 AM
I like it, but for Kramer can we cast Rahm as the snarky silly next door neighbor with a funky hairdo? His hook would be brandishing a Rambo knife and threatening random blue dogs in Congress vice coming in the door in a harried way like Kramer of old. Please? Pretty Please?!? I would watch it…
alohapundit on July 30, 2009 at 1:43 AM
Sometimes, I sit at my desk, swilling Jameson, and the thought hits me like a runaway alpaca…
…some cherries look like butts, from a certain angle.
Do insects dream? And if they do, who gives a f***?
MadisonConservative on July 30, 2009 at 1:46 AM
I love this post. (But then, I like Jack Handey, too.)
capitalist piglet on July 30, 2009 at 1:49 AM
Does that make Hillary the Whore of Babylon?
AaronGuzman on July 30, 2009 at 1:49 AM
Noise, not signal.
Tiresome.
spmat on July 30, 2009 at 1:54 AM
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