Hamas: Israel’s dropping aphrodisiac gum on us
posted at 5:45 pm on July 14, 2009 by Allahpundit
Time was you could at least count on Arab paranoia about Israel to be logical-ish, with the standard theory about secret Israeli bioweapons forever involving some plot to sterilize the Muslim world. Fast-forward to 2009 and we’ve got Hamas basically accusing them of trying to … boost the Palestinian birth rate.
You know times are tough in Gaza when they’re even starting to phone in their anti-semitic propaganda.
“We have discovered two types of stimulants that were introduced into the Gaza Strip from Israeli border crossings,” Hamas police spokesman Islam Shahwan told AFP.
“The first type is presented in the form of chewing gum and the second in the form of drops,” he said…
One suspect said he had received the products from an Israeli intelligence officer at a cut-rate price “with the officer saying they did not want money, but to distribute the products among the young people of Gaza,” Shahwan said.
“The intelligence services are aiming to corrupt the young generation by distributing these products among students.”
Hopefully the endless diet of Islamist death cult-ism that the kids there are fed will keep them on the straight and narrow. Exit question one: If Israel really does have chewing gum that makes you horny, wouldn’t the smarter move be to market it and then use the massive profits to just buy the West Bank? Exit question two: Why mess around with something as innocuous as viagra gum? If the goal is building a bioweapon that’ll “corrupt” Arab youth, go for the gold.
Blowback
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It only works if you combine it with the gay bomb, though.
lorien1973 on July 14, 2009 at 5:47 PM
Yeah…I will take the double mint gum to …
WashJeff on July 14, 2009 at 5:49 PM
Hey, at least it ain’t pork rinds.
Vashta.Nerada on July 14, 2009 at 5:49 PM
They are breeding like hamas killer bunnies I tell ya
William Amos on July 14, 2009 at 5:49 PM
Yeah, but then it’s simply fabulous.
TheUnrepentantGeek on July 14, 2009 at 5:49 PM
Palestinian girls are easy.
exception on July 14, 2009 at 5:50 PM
It’s test to see if you can scr_w and chew gum!
jake-the-goose on July 14, 2009 at 5:50 PM
Doin’ it Kosher Style.
portlandon on July 14, 2009 at 5:51 PM
Uhhh… Make Love, Not War?
Romeo13 on July 14, 2009 at 5:51 PM
Yep, those Hamas types are just dying to get at a virgin.
coldwarrior on July 14, 2009 at 5:51 PM
Hey, someone needs to bring sexy back to those Pali thugs!
JAM on July 14, 2009 at 5:52 PM
Wait. Why don’t they just make their own gum?
exception on July 14, 2009 at 5:52 PM
Israel should drop thousands of Korans by helicopter over Gaza, with the words “From Your Friends the Israelis ;)” written on attached post-its.
The superstitious Pal cavemen would then be forced into a difficult decision: Destroy the Korans and go to Islamic he!l for their deed, or keep them and suffer massive paranoia while wondering what the flock the Israeli’s are up to.
Bishop on July 14, 2009 at 5:52 PM
Abdul: Hey, Omar, why’s your hand between my thighs? Don’t you know that’s forbidden by the prophet?
Omar: Uhh, err . . . Jewish gum! It’s the Jewish gum I’m chewing!
fronclynne on July 14, 2009 at 5:52 PM
Maybe the next car swarm will be more interesting than the last… It’s hard to hold up dead guy body parts when you are busy holding a live guy’s body part.
/just sayin..
Key West Reader on July 14, 2009 at 5:53 PM
The amount of stupidity in this accusation is bottomless.
JAM on July 14, 2009 at 5:54 PM
It would also be funny to watch them attempt to catch teh Korans before they hit the ground. Sort of like the old Atari 2600 game Kaboom!
WashJeff on July 14, 2009 at 5:55 PM
Hmmmm.. they’ve got Stimulants. We got Stimulus.
Maybe we should trade?
Key West Reader on July 14, 2009 at 5:55 PM
Right… that would lead to a mass extinction….
CynicalOptimist on July 14, 2009 at 5:55 PM
There’s a “Did you blow bubbles as a kid?” joke in there somewhere. (H/T The Amazing Jonathan)
Patrick S on July 14, 2009 at 5:55 PM
My son hit me with that one and barely got away without a smack across his face. LOL…
Key West Reader on July 14, 2009 at 5:56 PM
Hamas had the stupidity market cornered until Jan 21.
WashJeff on July 14, 2009 at 5:56 PM
Tomorrow:
UN to condemn “Zionist confectioners”
battleoflepanto1571 on July 14, 2009 at 5:58 PM
Not only are they phoning it in, but they’re recycling it as well.
I think there were similar rumors in Egypt a couple of years ago too.
rw on July 14, 2009 at 5:58 PM
FIFY
Key West Reader on July 14, 2009 at 5:58 PM
Should drop This
William Amos on July 14, 2009 at 5:58 PM
Me
some hotair women
and a pack of this infamous gum
alhamdilillah!
blatantblue on July 14, 2009 at 5:59 PM
But! That might cause another poo-nami in Gaza~!
Key West Reader on July 14, 2009 at 5:59 PM
Dogs and cats living together …
OhEssYouCowboys on July 14, 2009 at 6:00 PM
Lol this has got to be the dumbest claim ever
blatantblue on July 14, 2009 at 6:00 PM
Michael Jackson in liquid form? That batch of Soylent Green is tainted.
portlandon on July 14, 2009 at 6:02 PM
Those Joooos get craftier all the time.
“If the flavor and effects of this gum last longer than r hours, call your doctor immediately.”
Fallen Sparrow on July 14, 2009 at 6:02 PM
FIFM
Fallen Sparrow on July 14, 2009 at 6:03 PM
4 out of 5 Palestinians prefer JOOOOOS Gum.
portlandon on July 14, 2009 at 6:03 PM
What’s next?
“the evil yahud have dropped cookies that make our imra’aat have bigger breasts”
blatantblue on July 14, 2009 at 6:03 PM
I think my wife will chew gum. If I say please.
HoustonRight on July 14, 2009 at 6:03 PM
Who is the target of the gum. If it is the young men it seems redundant.
Cindy Munford on July 14, 2009 at 6:04 PM
Unbelievable how stupid people can be… just unbelievable. You couldn’t make this up….. or could they?
ultracon on July 14, 2009 at 6:04 PM
Almost spit up my fruit smoothie all over the notebook for that one. :)
chemman on July 14, 2009 at 6:05 PM
Send in Bruno.
RobCon on July 14, 2009 at 6:05 PM
The jooooos are corrupting their precious bodily fluids.
pedestrian on July 14, 2009 at 6:05 PM
Thankfully for the Hamas guys, there is alot of sand to pound.
RobCon on July 14, 2009 at 6:05 PM
The Arabs have accused Israel of developing a bomb that kills only Muslims. Some called it a smart bomb.
No Niks on July 14, 2009 at 6:07 PM
Sheep, camels and donkeys hardest hit.
Aristotle on July 14, 2009 at 6:07 PM
Must be Squirt Gum
ornery_independent on July 14, 2009 at 6:07 PM
That’s all well and good, Abdullah, but the rest of us just ride the camel to town for a good time.
coldwarrior on July 14, 2009 at 6:07 PM
If combined with the gay bomb then it would be JoooosyFruit gum.
Guardian on July 14, 2009 at 6:07 PM
If they shake hands with an Israeli, it’ll make their thingie-dingie shrink.
Attila (Pillage Idiot) on July 14, 2009 at 6:07 PM
“Chewing gum, Mandrake? Children’s chewing gum?”
exception on July 14, 2009 at 6:09 PM
Did anyone see Bill Kristol’s blog post at the Weekly Standard today:
What an arrogant, pompous jerk. A guy who has been on the world scene for about five minutes is lecturing the Israelis to engage in some “serious self-reflection.”
Hey Obama, maybe they have already and what they reflect upon is the freakin’ Holocaust. Or maybe they reflect upon all the rockets that fly into their country or the suicide bombers. Or maybe they reflect upon the countless times the Arab nations have tried to eliminate them.
Who the hell is Barack Obama to lecture them about self-reflection?
JohnInCA on July 14, 2009 at 6:09 PM
Send in Bruno.
RobCon on July 14, 2009 at 6:05 PM
“Vaaaasssuuuppp? I laaahhveee your hat”
that was a good part
blatantblue on July 14, 2009 at 6:10 PM
So,Gazaland is declaring war on gum,whats next,mints!!
The American Thinker,has for a headline,
Hamas claims Gazans Plagued by Israeli Opertion Hubba Bubba.
canopfor on July 14, 2009 at 6:12 PM
Jewing gum ?
William Amos on July 14, 2009 at 6:13 PM
The Israelis figure it will be a lot harder for the Palis to crawl through tunnels to smuggle weapons if they have boners.
Cicero43 on July 14, 2009 at 6:13 PM
Is this another BJ blog?
fourdeucer on July 14, 2009 at 6:15 PM
Hmmm.. Born in Kenya (some say), no scholastic records but we HEAR that he went to Columbia and Harvard and was a Professor. Unfortunately, we cannot see these records. After an Ivy League education he became a Community Organizer. For ummm… about 14 years. Then, he was suddenly a Senator! Then, he became a Rock Star and then he became President of the USA.
I’d love to tell you who Barack Obama is, but unfortunately I cannot.
On the other hand: Some say that he is one big a@@ schmuckatelli from Chicago. Butcha know, that’s just what “they say”.
Key West Reader on July 14, 2009 at 6:15 PM
My question is, are they making this claim in order to urge their youth to be less promiscuous (i.e. If you give in to the urge you’re letting yourself be a tool of the eeeeeeeevil Israelis) or, are they making this claim in order to explain why their youth are promiscuous already (i.e. It’s not that they are struggling to fulfill their commitment to their faith and morals….it’s just that those eeeeeevil Israeli’s gave them horny gum!)?
JadeNYU on July 14, 2009 at 6:16 PM
Good grief, they can’t even be originally stupid! They have to pull out a special kind of recycled stupid from 12 yrs. ago?
The only thing worse than ignorance, is arrogance. — Einstein
JAM on July 14, 2009 at 6:16 PM
It’s for sale? Somebody stick an earmark in the next bill, stat. Mideast peace problem- solved.
cs89 on July 14, 2009 at 6:16 PM
Bahahahhaaa…. Winner!
2 free weeks of $14 dollar obama-puff brand cereal! Milk? Not Included!!
Key West Reader on July 14, 2009 at 6:17 PM
Just what the Israelis need, more horny Palestinians. This is the stupidest story coming out of the territories in a long time and that’s saying A LOT.
Lance Murdock on July 14, 2009 at 6:18 PM
Okay… I have not laughed for two minutes straight in over a year. Thank you, well done, still LMAO!
Key West Reader on July 14, 2009 at 6:19 PM
Some of the gum,come in different flavors;
Commando Cotton Candy
Airstrike Apple
Israeli Island Punch
Watermelon Rapid Assualt
-hehe.
canopfor on July 14, 2009 at 6:20 PM
Dude, if the gay bomb worked, I’d most assuredly share it with Israel, on the promise of them carpet bombing the Palestine region of Israel and then hitting Tehran.
Virus-X on July 14, 2009 at 6:23 PM
Jewzy Fruit Jewing Gum
thomasaur on July 14, 2009 at 6:24 PM
And that’s just the women.
Have you seen Palestinian females? Arf arf.
Bishop on July 14, 2009 at 6:25 PM
First term in the Community Organizer Dictionary.
“You people need to self-reflect and then come to a consensus about speaking truth to power and building the foundations for a better society.
That’ll be $1,000 please…and no checks”
Bishop on July 14, 2009 at 6:28 PM
Huh Iranian Paranoia has reached the Gaza Strip…..things must be really bad back in Iran.
Dr Evil on July 14, 2009 at 6:30 PM
Oh, man… This is the best analogy ever for Oblah-blah… Can you imagine how many pairs of Blahniks Michelle owns because of the great Oraface?
Stunning!
/wonder if the Great Oraface can compete with the Great Pumpkin. Their heads are the same size and shape.
Key West Reader on July 14, 2009 at 6:32 PM
Gum-chewing Pals: Hey, this is great, no need to blow myself up for 72 virgins! Let’s make whoopee!
Hey, Bibi (Netanyahu), got any gum left over for my wife?
Steve Z on July 14, 2009 at 6:35 PM
So, what flavor is it?
Rollie on July 14, 2009 at 6:35 PM
Barack Obama probably reflects on himself in the mirror very frequently, and falls in love every time. He has more trouble reflecting on other subjects.
Steve Z on July 14, 2009 at 6:39 PM
Maybe it is pre-inserted into a woman’s vagina, to give the men a foretaste.
Steve Z on July 14, 2009 at 6:41 PM
This is just insane to allege.
If anything, Israel should bomb them with stuff that kills fertility, since one of the problems is the fact that the Palis (and other muslims) breed like roaches.
wildcat84 on July 14, 2009 at 6:49 PM
I’ve always said that there’d be less terrorists if the Palestinians learned how to have a real good, er, lay. So have at it, Israel.
mjk on July 14, 2009 at 6:53 PM
The population in Gaza has doubled in 10 years. So much for the argument that the Israelis were committing genocide.
Blake on July 14, 2009 at 6:54 PM
Sure – just what the Israeli’s want: more Palestinian women to have welfare babies on the international dole. Their high birth rate basically means the international community, including the US, is unwittingly financing a terrorism nursery.
redfoxbluestate on July 14, 2009 at 7:14 PM
Does this mean the Palestinian genocide is over?
ThePrez on July 14, 2009 at 7:24 PM
A Palestinian youth was seen blowing bubbles. He was so happy, it had been years since Bubbles was back in town and they were glad to see each other.
ThePrez on July 14, 2009 at 7:30 PM
I’D BUY THAT FOR A DOLLAR!
MadisonConservative on July 14, 2009 at 7:46 PM
(What ever happened to the “Double-Mint” twins?)
Is this just someone telling the Pali’s to go bleep themselves?
oldleprechaun on July 14, 2009 at 8:11 PM
I’m glad that HAMAS hasn’t foiled our plot to turn Gaza into Israeli territory with our top secret Jewing Gum. Chew just one piece and you are instantly transformed into a Jew.
OxyCon on July 14, 2009 at 8:51 PM
So that’s what This gum was really about.
batterup on July 14, 2009 at 9:10 PM
These people are so lazy and delusional they would fit right in with our home grown Democrats.
NoDonkey on July 14, 2009 at 9:15 PM
Are you kidding? This is beyond mere evil; it’s diabolical.
I mean, think about it: what’s the worst threat to the Palestinian people?
What ethnic group has done the most damage to the Palestine cause?
And now, thanks to this Israeli master stroke, there are going to be even MORE of them!
It’s the one thing that Palestine can never survive.
logis on July 14, 2009 at 9:47 PM
I read somewhere that respect is the most powerful aphrodisiac (seriously). Certainly the Israelis were not dropping packs of gum and drops filled with respect.
Shock the Monkey on July 14, 2009 at 11:29 PM
Isn’t genetics a wonderful thing.
OldEnglish on July 14, 2009 at 11:39 PM
I find it hard to believe that Israel wants to encourage Palestinian breeding.
Hilts on July 15, 2009 at 8:13 AM
And let us not forget those perfidious Mossad Agents in Africa, who when they shake hands with muslim men caused their genitalia to disappear entirely.
eaglewingz08 on July 15, 2009 at 11:44 AM