Pelosi + Haiku = Pelosiku
posted at 5:50 pm on May 15, 2009 by Jim Treacher
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I knew I knew not
And I didn’t know I knew
Now my face implodes
***
What’s this trigger do?
Ouch, my right foot really hurts
Let’s try the left one
***
As I tell my tales
Watch me blink out in Morse Code:
“I’m a lying [bleep]”
***
I am not lying
Except for what I just said
And what I’ll say next
***
I’ve been a liar
A lot longer than Barack
But without his gift
***
My nose doesn’t grow
(Way too much rhinoplasty)
But my stitches twitch
***
Lefty blogs confused
They’ll opine on me, after
Rahm’s conference call
***
Who’s nervous? Not me
I’ve looked like this ever since
They cut up my face
***
I own some vineyards
Which will give me a good place
To store my sour grapes
***
Waterboarding stinks
I thought it would moisturize
But my face pruned up
***
For more, see Twitter. Or try your own in the comments. It’s fun!
Update (AP): I like this one from Karl, too.
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Comment pages: « Previous 1 2 3
Lies in the mirror
My facial plastic lies to all
Lies come out my ass
My country is safer
Waterboarding saved my state
lies come out my ass
I hate george and dick
it must be all of their fault
lies come out my ass
The heat is too much
the plastic is melting now
lies come out my ass
UNREPENTANT CONSERVATIVE CAPITOLIST on May 16, 2009 at 10:48 AM
Under bus she goes.
It is so crowded now; they
Should put up curtains.
TheQuestion on May 16, 2009 at 11:22 AM
Forgot to post this one yesterday. I know, I know…probably should have stayed forgotten! Yet, that doesn’t stop me. Sigh.
kerfuffled, confused
can’t even eat my words, as
my face doesn’t move
Lori_Z on May 16, 2009 at 1:12 PM
You guys are awesome
Sharing the schadenfreude
Is always more fun
Jim Treacher on May 16, 2009 at 1:13 PM
The steely-eyed leader’s
Face betrays no emotion.
More strength through Botox.
gridlock2 on May 16, 2009 at 1:53 PM
I am not a crook.
Not the droids you’re looking for.
The CIA lied.
gridlock2 on May 16, 2009 at 1:55 PM
These are great! Such talented haikuers.
my favorite–Lori_Z on May 16, 2009 at 1:12 PM
becki51758 on May 16, 2009 at 2:51 PM
The more my hands wave,
Back and forth, obscuring truth
You can see me lie.
Huckabye-Romney on May 16, 2009 at 3:12 PM
Bush and his spies lied.
Obama will get my back.
Do you hear a bus?
Huckabye-Romney on May 16, 2009 at 3:14 PM
Underbus is hungry
The Present must feed his pet
Roast Nan with Reds’ “whine”
Blacksmith on May 16, 2009 at 3:46 PM
The CIA lied
But O will save me; oh look
A bus approaches
OC Sandman on May 16, 2009 at 3:58 PM
May two thousand 2
Pelosi’s pants blaze in flames
Will O defend her?
Upstater85 on May 16, 2009 at 8:56 PM
Liars and tax cheats
Corrupt administration
Resign, Pelosi.
Vashta.Nerada on May 16, 2009 at 11:58 PM
Blink blink blink blink blink
Blink blink blink blink blink blink blink
Blink blink blink blink blink
(Stolen from somewhere, probably an Ace guest.)
baldilocks on May 17, 2009 at 1:32 AM
I would rather be
water-boarded by Orcs
than watch Pelosi
OC Sandman on May 17, 2009 at 2:11 AM
Botox treatments fail
To cover the ugly truth
Nancy loses face
OC Sandman on May 17, 2009 at 2:17 AM
I am not a crook
I deny all knowledge of
Water(boarding)Gate
OC Sandman on May 17, 2009 at 2:39 AM
The best way to tell
that I am lying to you
is when my lips move
Huckabye-Romney on May 17, 2009 at 9:07 AM
MSM help me.
I’ve fallen and can’t get up.
Oh look, a puppy!
Huckabye-Romney on May 17, 2009 at 9:09 AM
She can’t remember
That long day in September
See Pelosi blink
Witnesses were there
And the notes will be compared
See her blinking stare
History will show
The Speaker was caught lying
See Dick Cheney’s grin
chipandcharge on May 17, 2009 at 9:42 AM
such serious times
do make me wish I could still
lower my eyebrows
Changucopia on May 17, 2009 at 3:04 PM
In truth I sow lies
And Heaven bursts in ice storms
That melt in my palm
entagor on May 18, 2009 at 4:05 AM
Pelosi you reek
Your lies are like excrement
Fouling up the air
hillbillyjim on May 18, 2009 at 6:03 AM
Stammering the words
Staggering the path
Always to mislead
Majestic Mt. Fuji
My face stands frozen
All to mislead
Strength is the land
Transparency I vow
Neither I embrace
right2bright on May 18, 2009 at 9:27 AM
There are lies aplenty
Nancy tries to cover her ass
Steps in it big time
Pcoop on May 19, 2009 at 10:13 AM
Comment pages: « Previous 1 2 3