Comedy gold: “Will You Be Here Tomorrow?”

posted at 2:14 pm on April 11, 2009 by Allahpundit

A recently re-discovered masterpiece from the annals of American instructional video. Imagine “Blood On The Highway” adapted from driver’s ed to workplace safety and filtered through the sensibility of a director of low-budget 80s slasher films. Presto: A comedy classic of the occupational-hazard genre. The best part comes a little more than two minutes in. You’ll know it when you see it.

The gore is cartoonish but there’s a lot of it, so if you’re squeamish, please observe your official content warning.

Breaking on Hot Air

Blowback

Note from Hot Air management: This section is for comments from Hot Air's community of registered readers. Please don't assume that Hot Air management agrees with or otherwise endorses any particular comment just because we let it stand. A reminder: Anyone who fails to comply with our terms of use may lose their posting privilege.

Trackbacks/Pings

Trackback URL

Comments

“Red Asphalt”

multiuseless on April 11, 2009 at 2:20 PM

You couldn’t get people to stay awake 5 minutes for a instructional video if it wasn’t gory.

BTW , this was the prequel to “an inconclusive truth” .

the_nile on April 11, 2009 at 2:21 PM

Looks like a perfect example of the Obama administration thus far:

Just chock full of good intentions and harmless ideas resulting in abject disaster at every turn.

catmman on April 11, 2009 at 2:21 PM

I assume the best part was the flying gas tank of death?

I couldn’t keep watching. The violence was cartoonish I guess, but I am squeamish.

jimmy the notable on April 11, 2009 at 2:22 PM

So, if I understand this, if you’re not safe at work you might get hurt? Bad. Real bad?

Hmm, I think Ingmar Bergmann would have taken the subject in a different direction.

Bibbi Anderson as the bosses secretary…yeah, that’ll work.

SteveMG on April 11, 2009 at 2:23 PM

Hmm, I think Ingmar Bergmann would have taken the subject in a different direction

Scratch that. Let’s try Kurosawa in Rashomon.

One terrible accident – a guy loses two legs – and then seven different co-workers recount their memories of the accident.

SteveMG on April 11, 2009 at 2:28 PM

I’m sure you’ll have some guffaws over this, but having worked in the chemical industry for 27 years, I find little comedy in this video. . While the attempt at blood and guts looked a bit fakey, when accidents happen in industry, they often look a lot worse than this. The real way to keep these things from happening is to think ahead of time. You can’t expect the company to keep you safe all the time if you don’t take personal responsibility. Just like you can’t expect govt. to take care of you all the time if you don’t take personal responsibility.
Responses saying: get a sense of humor, jerk in 5..4..3..

Christian Conservative on April 11, 2009 at 2:30 PM

I haven’t watched it yet, but that guy in the screencap kinda looks like Al Gore, doesn’t he? At least I thought so. I was expected some hyperventilating bit about global warming.

TheQuestion on April 11, 2009 at 2:32 PM

Grindhouse Presents: Robert Rodriguez’s Workplace Terror

elgeneralisimo on April 11, 2009 at 2:32 PM

You owe me 4:52 of my life. I will collect.

ambuldog on April 11, 2009 at 2:35 PM

Christian Conservative on April 11, 2009 at 2:30 PM

It’s all fun and games until someone loses a finger. (yeah me)

thomasaur on April 11, 2009 at 2:36 PM

We’re making fun of the film on the topic not the topic itself.

SteveMG on April 11, 2009 at 2:37 PM

We’re making fun of the film on the topic not the topic itself.

SteveMG on April 11, 2009 at 2:37 PM

Lighten up Francis, we’re aware of that.

thomasaur on April 11, 2009 at 2:40 PM

Not as good as the Wendy’s training video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4KIdTPS6LH4

Mark1971 on April 11, 2009 at 2:41 PM

Too much, Allah. Too much!

Note to self: if unable to get a job in Academe, take something in the service industry…

Tzetzes on April 11, 2009 at 2:42 PM

Meh. That stuff was nothing compared to what I’ve seen in real life.

boomer on April 11, 2009 at 2:43 PM

This is what you can expect from one errant decision and a nanosecond of time.

This is much more gross.

ericdijon on April 11, 2009 at 2:45 PM

Lighten up Francis, we’re aware of that.

Just underlining for our friend Christian Conservative as to where the jokes are directed.

SteveMG on April 11, 2009 at 2:45 PM

ROFLMAO! Priceless, priceless…(wiping tears of laughter from eyes) Thank you, Hot Air… Allahpundit akbar…

fitzsweetpea on April 11, 2009 at 2:45 PM

Not as good as the Wendy’s training video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4KIdTPS6LH4

Mark1971 on April 11, 2009 at 2:41 PM

Ha ha ha! Even better than the singing patties, I loved the air-spatula!

Tzetzes on April 11, 2009 at 2:46 PM

Indeed, the torpedo gas cylinder into the office was the only really funny one. Well, maybe the one where the angry guy shoves his hands into the machine – because he’s angry. That was kinda funny. But I think the real effect of this video is to make people not want to work in factories.

However, the one danger they didn’t touch on was the one where your plant goes on strike, you cross the picket lines, and some guy named Angelo goes to town with a baseball bat.

keep the change on April 11, 2009 at 2:47 PM

ericdijon on April 11, 2009 at 2:45 PM

Now that’s starting to get there.

boomer on April 11, 2009 at 2:47 PM

Oh this brings back memories of my past life. At one job, a guy knocked over an entire pallet containing buckets of solvent. The place smelled for days after that.

KillerKane on April 11, 2009 at 2:48 PM

OT: Does anyone here subscribe to Hot Air via the Amazon Kindle? If so does it work well, and can you comment?

boomer on April 11, 2009 at 2:51 PM

I almost hate to watch this stuff… I’ve been on the shop floor for 35 years. Seen tons of accidents, big and small, a number of which were represented in this video. Currently, I’m one of the first responders in a lithium battery factory, loads of potential there. We have laser welders, liquid nitrogen (-321 F), hazardous metals, explosives of a wide range of types, numerous acids, and the list goes on and on.
-
Actually, me and another guy put out a metals fire a few months ago. When the building manager arrived and started barking orders I went for a walk. When I came back he had the fire going again. If we had not removed the acid filled rejects from under the bench (as he was telling us not to), that would have been burning also because the fire burned through and poured multi-thousand degree burning lithium right where the rejects had been being stored. Now that would have been a nice fire, a couple hundred exploding electrolyte filled stainless steel hand grenades.
-
The 2 wheeled forklift driver use to work with me in another shop… We banned him from driving after he pulled that stunt (he thought it was funny). May have saved his life.
-

RalphyBoy on April 11, 2009 at 2:52 PM

Allah, you are a sick man…

…But so am I. That was awesome.

Zetterson on April 11, 2009 at 2:53 PM

boomer on April 11, 2009 at 2:47 PM

I wrestled with what I should use as the distinction between that and 2girlsone somethingorother and had to flip a coin. Lucky I remembered it was workplace gross and had the good sense to choose the snopes gross link. Otherwise, I can’t tell you how fast this link would have ignited every one’s monitors in a flash of flames.

ericdijon on April 11, 2009 at 2:55 PM

ericdijon on April 11, 2009 at 2:55 PM

I used to be an EMT and covered a few really gross calls. One the deceased was, well, here and there and over there and some over there too. Another was a five year old that looked like the guy on the dozer. I had brain matter in the tread of one of my shoes.

boomer on April 11, 2009 at 3:02 PM

Starring Jack Bauer.

Valiant on April 11, 2009 at 3:02 PM

boomer on April 11, 2009 at 3:02 PM

Thanks NO THANKS for sharing.

portlandon on April 11, 2009 at 3:04 PM

I vote we put up the Wendy’s vid as well.

It has much better production value…

catmman on April 11, 2009 at 3:04 PM

I have to see films like this all the time, though not quite this graphic and gorey. Every new facility, rig or platform that I go to, and every time that I board a helicopter, requires a safety orientation that usually involves some cheesey video. The average person is fighting to say awake or to keep from laughing and making jokes. While safety is a serious matter, it is so overdone that it has lost much of its saliency. The joke is that Safety is really Litigation Control.

DAT60A3 on April 11, 2009 at 3:07 PM

portlandon on April 11, 2009 at 3:04 PM

I’m thinking about trying out all of the commenter roles today.

boomer on April 11, 2009 at 3:07 PM

boomer on April 11, 2009 at 3:02 PM

That is sad. We pray for EMT’s in this house. The rest of us are pretty ungrateful for EMT’s and other community support mechanisms until we need them.

Anyway, can anyone imagine what the last thing that went through his mind was?

ericdijon on April 11, 2009 at 3:07 PM

As someone who lost a fingertip in a moment carelessness, I have to say this this may be an amateurish production but it is definitely not funny.

batman on April 11, 2009 at 3:10 PM

Classic. Awesome production value. For a moment there I thought I was watching deleted scenes from The Evil Dead or a long-lost Monty Python skit.

29Victor on April 11, 2009 at 3:18 PM

I love the guy welding three sealed solvent drums. Um, can you say suicide? That was no accident.

But hey, every director’s gotta get a start somewhere. This is as good a place as any.

You should see the look on the students in my lab when I talk about organic solvents and contact lenses in the eyes. Every semester there’s one who looks like they’re about to throw up.

Nethicus on April 11, 2009 at 3:20 PM

As someone who lost a fingertip in a moment carelessness, I have to say this this may be an amateurish production but it is definitely not funny.

batman on April 11, 2009 at 3:10 PM

Dude. I was in a coma for three days, permanently lost my sense of smell and nearly died because someone else was screwing around and I can say without hesitation that this video is funny, funny stuff.

29Victor on April 11, 2009 at 3:22 PM

The tempermental guy hurt himself for workman’s comp. And I know from FPS experience that you don’t mess with barrels when you’re standing right next to them!

Grafted on April 11, 2009 at 3:22 PM

Was that Alan Colmes with a beard at 4:00 in?

Dr.Cwac.Cwac on April 11, 2009 at 3:22 PM

How about the original first ever produced American instructional video: Reefer Madness that was made to show parents about the dangers of Marijuana.

This film was shown to Congress and they passed the laws banning any and all cannabis in the US after viewing it.

JeffinSac on April 11, 2009 at 3:26 PM

Oh and I forgot to add, if you have not watched this 1930′s film you should because it is too funny. :-)

JeffinSac on April 11, 2009 at 3:27 PM

Mark1971 on April 11, 2009 at 2:41 PM

Why did you have to do that?

I’m having flashbacks of watching that video. The horror. The horror.

Dr.Cwac.Cwac on April 11, 2009 at 3:28 PM

has this film ever feed a starving child?

Captain America on April 11, 2009 at 3:29 PM

No one remember’s these PSA’s?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tN2gpRcFKAQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUu0lVN6Nhw

JetBoy on April 11, 2009 at 3:30 PM

2:21 – No, not the coffee pot! Noooooo!

Crusty on April 11, 2009 at 3:30 PM

Was that Alan Colmes with a beard at 4:00 in?

Dr.Cwac.Cwac on April 11, 2009 at 3:22 PM

Impossible. It’s a well-known fact that Visitors from planet Colmes are incapable of growing facial hair.

29Victor on April 11, 2009 at 3:40 PM

very funny.

rob verdi on April 11, 2009 at 3:41 PM

AP you are one sick puppy. I feel guiltly for laughing.

aengus on April 11, 2009 at 3:44 PM

Dang, glad I don’t work anywhere near that factory, jeeez…

RedbonePro on April 11, 2009 at 3:45 PM

Jetboy, that one is truly hilarious. If that doesn’t illicit a guffaw people, you have ice in your veins.

keep the change on April 11, 2009 at 3:48 PM

I think the forklift safety film was funnier.

Coronagold on April 11, 2009 at 3:50 PM

Ok. The guy whose finger got snagged while falling, I was stationed with a guy that did the same thing. He was jumping from the back of a stake bed truck and his wedding ring got caught.

Long after it healed (he lost it from the knuckle out) we used to razz him unmercifully. We were in a cargo handling unit. Hand signals to a crane operator were one finger for very slow, up to five fingers for as fast as it would go. We called him “Up Four and a Half.”

So one day I was working in the cargo hold and he was directing the crane operator. He was leaning over the hatch opening and I hollered up to ask what time it was. He held up both hands with a combination of fingers.

I asked, “What time did you say?” He yelled, “Nine O’Clock!” I yelled back, “Oh. I thought you said Eight Thirty.”

Ok. It was a lot funnier when we were dog tired from working 12/12 for several weeks.

TugboatPhil on April 11, 2009 at 3:51 PM

Ok. It was a lot funnier when we were dog tired from working 12/12 for several weeks.

TugboatPhil on April 11, 2009 at 3:51 PM

I can enjoy that one because I worked with a guy who was missing 1/4 of his index finger and I’m missing 3/4 of my pinky. After work we would stop at the Pub for a beer, he drank Coors and I drank Heiney, his cost 2.75 and mine 3.25. Guess you had to be there.

thomasaur on April 11, 2009 at 4:02 PM

Ok. It was a lot funnier when we were dog tired from working 12/12 for several weeks.

TugboatPhil on April 11, 2009 at 3:51 PM
I can enjoy that one because I worked with a guy who was missing 1/4 of his index finger and I’m missing 3/4 of my pinky. After work we would stop at the Pub for a beer, he drank Coors and I drank Heiney, his cost 2.75 and mine 3.25. Guess you had to be there.

thomasaur on April 11, 2009 at 4:02 PM

My dad lost half his middle finger in a meat grinder when he was a teenager. He had all kinds of fun like; did he just try to flip me off…is he really knuckle deep in his nose or ear? The fun possibilities were endless.

hot-heir on April 11, 2009 at 4:21 PM

All the more reason to get business’ going again. To thin the herd.

oakpack on April 11, 2009 at 4:30 PM

“Will You Be Here Tomorrow?”

To think that our nation gives safety and quality a chance, but we trade with nations that do not such as Mexico, China and India.

sethstorm on April 11, 2009 at 4:32 PM

Why this complain about safety? Sell gotes and no need job!

Ars Moriendi on April 11, 2009 at 4:33 PM

Ars Moriendi on April 11, 2009 at 4:33 PM

My idea exactly.

sethstorm on April 11, 2009 at 4:39 PM

Some of the idiots actions in this clip deserved the result. Sure, take a torch to a sealed drum not knowing whats inside…heh.

BL@KBIRD on April 11, 2009 at 4:53 PM

Am I the only one here who thought “Will You Be Here Tomorrow” was a Shirelles hit…?

Captain Scarlet on April 11, 2009 at 5:23 PM

“Mr. Hand, he’s gonna be mean to me! Nooooooooooooooo!”

Oh, and they forgot the potential tragic consequences of running with scissors.

iurockhead on April 11, 2009 at 5:30 PM

holy toledo.

did you see the dummy that fell in the beginning? it was like something from the naked gun!

joey24007 on April 11, 2009 at 5:33 PM

holy toledo.

did you see the dummy that fell in the beginning? it was like something from the naked gun!

joey24007 on April 11, 2009 at 5:33 PM

Just because he fell doesn’t make him a “dummy”…

Anyone can slip.

heh…

JetBoy on April 11, 2009 at 5:50 PM

Two months ago I was installing a set of attic stairs in my garage. As I was lowering the stairs into the opening, the door snapped shut on both of my hands, trapping them and crushing the last two fingers on each hand. This isn’t one of those doors with the weak springs, either…it’s gas-piston operated and it has a really powerful closing force.

So there I am…in the attic, the only one in the house, with no way to get any kind of leverage to free myself, and with no way to call anyone for help except by yelling my head off. Luckily one of my neighbors was home in the middle of the day and eventually heard me…he was able to come up and pry the door off of my hands.

No permanent damage done, but I was plenty afraid I was going to lose one or more fingers to gangrene since the blood was cut off for a really long time. There’s still some residual numbness that will eventually go away, and I’m still regrowing a new nail on one of them, but I consider myself extremely fortunate that it worked out the way it did.

Also, I’ve seen real pictures of the finger/ring thing…it freaks me out every time I think of that bare skeletal finger on an otherwise normal hand. But the worst picture was of a motorcyclist who didn’t wear a full-face helmet and clipped off his entire lower jaw.

James on April 11, 2009 at 6:19 PM

they may be a bit cartoonish, but having worked in plants for 30 years I have personally seen some of these types of accidents happen. Specifically the forklift out of the back of a trailer and the exploding drum. I remember our safety guy showing us this video and the ring getting caught part got me to stop wearing my wedding ring at work, my wife never understood why. Thanks AP, I will show her this video now.

conservnut on April 11, 2009 at 6:24 PM

If I watched that during orientation for a factory job, I’d quit right there. Ain’t worth the risk.

- The Cat

MirCat on April 11, 2009 at 6:55 PM

James on April 11, 2009 at 6:19 PM

I started to do the ring/finger thing. Luckily I hit the ground before it yanked it off. I walked away with a nasty laceration. I completely forgot about that until you mentioned that.

boomer on April 11, 2009 at 7:07 PM

MirCat on April 11, 2009 at 6:55 PM

Ya just gotta watch what you are doing. With that being said sometimes people get do get distracted from their job. There is a beef packing house near where I live. I’ve seen the result of some of the accidents there and sometimes wonder what is really in that hamburger. Gee, I hope nobody is eating when they read this.

boomer on April 11, 2009 at 7:10 PM

Mayhem!

Happy Easter!

(BTW: forklifts are expensive $$$$$)

juanito on April 11, 2009 at 7:24 PM

Not red asphalt, Red stapler— bum bum buummmmm!!!!!

FontanaConservative on April 11, 2009 at 8:05 PM

Ah, if only they had card check.

Mike Antonucci on April 11, 2009 at 8:09 PM

Losing a finger because a ring got caught on something is one of the most common accidents even Neil Armstrong lost a finger when he jumped off a tractor & his wedding band got caught on something.

That’s one small step for a man, one giant Aahhhhhhhhhhhhh

borg on April 11, 2009 at 8:50 PM

borg on April 11, 2009 at 8:50 PM

Houston, we have a problem.

boomer on April 11, 2009 at 11:12 PM

Ah, the banality of white-collar professions.

MadisonConservative on April 12, 2009 at 12:34 AM

I laughed more often that I probably should’ve but….

Yakko77 on April 12, 2009 at 1:45 AM

You know, if I saw that movie at my workplace, portraying the kinds of horrible things that could happen to me, I’d quit that very day.

R. Waher on April 12, 2009 at 1:50 AM

RalphyBoy on April 11, 2009 at 2:52 PM

Congrats, Ralphy, you’ve just turned my bowels to water.

The very concept of an uncontrolled Delta fire in such an environment should scare the willies out of any former or current Coastie.

BTW What method did you use to put it out?

Random Numbers (Brian Epps) on April 12, 2009 at 4:04 AM

So, if I understand this, if you’re not safe at work you might get hurt? Bad. Real bad?

SteveMG on April 11, 2009 at 2:23 PM

No. It means that if you go to work, you aren’t safe.

unclesmrgol on April 12, 2009 at 4:45 AM

Hmmm, how many of those industrial workers have jobs today-11yrs later?

Will you be here tomorrow?
Will you have a job tomorrow?

scottm on April 12, 2009 at 7:43 AM

Why this complain about safety? Sell gotes and no need job!

Ars Moriendi on April 11, 2009 at 4:33 PM

As long as e-verify is not required to comment on HA, we can get good career advice here in the Age of Obama.

Thanks, Ars!

Right_of_Attila on April 12, 2009 at 9:55 AM

This Administration will regulate U.S. into safely watching production come to a halt. Because it is too dangerous to produce anything here, the left’s solution is send it overseas or only have right wing lunatics do it, because these people are expendable for the left’s cause.

MSGTAS on April 12, 2009 at 10:24 AM

I’m guessing early Tarantino

John the Libertarian on April 12, 2009 at 10:56 AM

The company I work for actually showed that video during one of our safety meetings several years ago. The safety guy got a little upset because folks either
1. Got grossed out and quit watching or
2. Laughed at the corniness of it and started mocking it.
Very serious topic. Very very bad video.

WesTexan on April 12, 2009 at 8:31 PM

Someone needs to put out a video showcasing the dangers of not thoroughly reading labels on power supplies…and reading, say, 1.5 Volts .5 Amps when the output is .5 Volts and 1.5 Amps.

I probably came as close to killing myself that day as I ever have in my life…

Dark-Star on April 12, 2009 at 10:22 PM

I’m a Sign Language Interpreter and I remember interpreting this for various companies! What a hoot!

CynicalOptimist on April 13, 2009 at 2:04 PM