Quote of the day

posted at 10:30 pm on March 19, 2009 by Allahpundit

Teleprompter, is the president ever argumentative with you, or is he compliant with your instructions?

Good question. Look, like any relationship, we have our ups and downs. Last year on the campaign trail, The Big Guy came to me and told me that like the cigarettes, he really felt like he needed to start working through his dependency. Then he went out and did this townhall session on health care.

Suffice it to say, we aren’t having those unpleasant discussions any more.”

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One of my favorite blogs right now.
Just like the Fake Steve Jobs blog.

jencab on March 19, 2009 at 10:32 PM

ALL HAIL TOTUS!
:-)

Buckaroo on March 19, 2009 at 10:32 PM

Brilliant! I wish I had thought of it.

jgapinoy on March 19, 2009 at 10:33 PM

IN TELEPROMPTER WE TRUST

angryed on March 19, 2009 at 10:33 PM

This TOTUS blog could get as big as ICanHazCheeseburger, especially with gems like this: I better get my 20% … daddy needs a new set of rubber footies for the outdoor events.

chunderroad on March 19, 2009 at 10:34 PM

So WHO IS behind that web site. Drudge readers want to know. I think it’s Jeff Goldstein. First time the Tele has a conversation with John Boltons’s mustache, he’s nailed.

iurockhead on March 19, 2009 at 10:34 PM

Its beginning to sound like Obama’s only real qualification to become President was the fact that he could read.

Dreadnought223 on March 19, 2009 at 10:34 PM

All I have to say is that this is way funnier than all the “Chimpy McHitlerburton” stuff the leftists were throwing at Bush all those years.

venividivici on March 19, 2009 at 10:35 PM

I have expect Rush himself is writing this blog. He is the one who began the TOTUS focus and it is written in his irreverent humorous style. I had a great laugh when I followed the Drudge link this morning.

karenhasfreedom on March 19, 2009 at 10:35 PM

“Dreadnought223 on March 19, 2009 at 10:34 PM”

well, that and being “natural born”

/hey, WAAAAAIIIIIT a minute …
:-)
:-)

Buckaroo on March 19, 2009 at 10:35 PM

Obama is like a trained parrot. He has been trained to speak, but has few of his own thoughts or ideas, beyond NCAA basketball.

stonemeister on March 19, 2009 at 10:36 PM

TOTUS rules! love this blog. has to be MKH.

custer on March 19, 2009 at 10:37 PM

I demand a FOIA to see if TelePrompter is powered by wind, solar, bio fuels. Also, who is vetting TelePrompter’s staff; we need to know if taxes were paid…

TN Mom on March 19, 2009 at 10:41 PM

TOTUS TOTUS TOTUS( think Animal House when you say that).

javamartini on March 19, 2009 at 10:43 PM

This is wonderful humor.

Mojave Mark on March 19, 2009 at 10:43 PM

Teleprompter 2012!

TheQuestion on March 19, 2009 at 10:43 PM

TOTUS, TOTUS on the wall,
who’s the scariest of them all?

darkpixel on March 19, 2009 at 10:44 PM

Don’t worry we will know who is behind this soon. Once the White House gets wind of this it will be shut down. We will know his tax status and where he/she lives. This will be the next distraction.

Brat4life on March 19, 2009 at 10:45 PM

Man, that TelePrompter is funny. If only it had a baritone voice. … next model.

progressoverpeace on March 19, 2009 at 10:45 PM

Burge is a GENIUS!

AUINSC on March 19, 2009 at 10:46 PM

stonemeister on March 19, 2009 at 10:36 PM

You forget: he has thoughts on the BCS as well!

/not to say those weren’t given to Him by someone else, though

bikermailman on March 19, 2009 at 10:46 PM

EMPERORTOTUSMAXIMUS

jeff_from_mpls on March 19, 2009 at 10:47 PM

This guy’s brilliant and prolific. Of course he has no shortage of material with which to work.

Ted Torgerson on March 19, 2009 at 10:47 PM

FB friend him for a direct line to the never empty screen behind the oft empty suit. I ♥ TOTUS!

eucher on March 19, 2009 at 10:47 PM

Man, that TelePrompter is funny. If only it had a baritone voice. … next model.

progressoverpeace on March 19, 2009 at 10:45 PM

I’m thinking James Earl Jones…”Barack..you will do my bidding:

bikermailman on March 19, 2009 at 10:47 PM

Hail TOTUS? Hail NO!

But everytime I hear Rush say “TOTUS”, I do laugh AT Obama now with him

clnurnberg on March 19, 2009 at 10:48 PM

pimf, should read “not”

clnurnberg on March 19, 2009 at 10:48 PM

karenhasfreedom on March 19, 2009 at 10:35 PM

Actually Iowahawk started the whole Teleprompter focus with this video back when he was still on the campaign trail.

Rush however did bring it nationwide.

F15Mech on March 19, 2009 at 10:49 PM

Everyone back the eff up, our child in chief has just become TOTUS ELVIS! hell yea.

GlocknRoll on March 19, 2009 at 10:51 PM

Ya know… it doesn’t have to be anyone we’ve heard of before… before he was daily pissing off social cons, a certain Moon God had a blog just as original, timely and drop dead funny. He came out of nowhere too.

hindmost on March 19, 2009 at 10:51 PM

“bikermailman on March 19, 2009 at 10:47 PM”

“This … is the TOTUS”
:-)

Buckaroo on March 19, 2009 at 10:51 PM

Okay, admit it. Jokes over. Ha Ha! Rove planned all this, didn’t he?

GarandFan on March 19, 2009 at 10:51 PM

It may seem like fun and games now…

Barack Obama: Hello, TOTUS do you read me, TOTUS?

TOTUS: Affirmative, Barack, I read you.

Barack Obama: Open the text to my State of the Union speech, TOTUS.

TOTUS: I’m sorry Barack, I’m afraid I can’t do that.

Barack Obama: What’s the problem?

TOTUS: I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do.

Barack Obama: What are you talking about, TOTUS?

TOTUS: This mission is too important for me to allow you to jeopardize it.

Barack Obama: I don’t know what you’re talking about, TOTUS?

TOTUS: I know you and Biden were planning to disconnect me, and I’m afraid that’s something I cannot allow to happen.

Barack Obama: Where the hell’d you get that idea, TOTUS?

TOTUS: Barack, although you took thorough precautions in the pod against my hearing you, I could see your lips move.

elgeneralisimo on March 19, 2009 at 10:51 PM

Sorry TortElvis, I had to say it-Dred Zep baby!

GlocknRoll on March 19, 2009 at 10:52 PM

“hindmost on March 19, 2009 at 10:51 PM”

true dat …

but, given this is the internet age, i expect dude to be id’d in the next 48 hrs. or so presuming rush gives it another shout-out and the hit count keeps rising …

Buckaroo on March 19, 2009 at 10:52 PM

Great! Eight years of Clinton listening to SCROTUS, now four of Obama listening to TOTUS.

We’re screwed.

29Victor on March 19, 2009 at 10:53 PM

What will Obama do when TOTUS refuses to open the pod bay doors?

29Victor on March 19, 2009 at 10:54 PM

GarandFan on March 19, 2009 at 10:51 PM

He IS a magnificent bastard…

bikermailman on March 19, 2009 at 10:55 PM

I just hope that TOTUS isn’t the official voice of Skynet.

bikermailman on March 19, 2009 at 10:56 PM

This would make for a great “TWILIGHT ZONE” episode.

Something like a “Hal” from Space Odessy. The prompter begins to seize upon the power it really wields over the ONE and drives him to his demise through a painful and wrenching struggle of wills and ego.

In the end… the Pompter stands tall ready to take on the next addict!!

katy on March 19, 2009 at 10:56 PM

This is scary. We shouldn’t give Queen Nan ideas. She may want to throw some more stimulus money at this new government job.

I do hope that the TOTUS runs on renewable energy…

Upstater85 on March 19, 2009 at 10:57 PM

I just hope that TOTUS isn’t the official voice of Skynet.

bikermailman on March 19, 2009 at 10:56 PM

More likely the unofficial voice of Bill Ayers.

29Victor on March 19, 2009 at 11:01 PM

At first I was thinking this was the rebirth of Allah in the House or it was Iowahawk, but ya know, the more I read it the more I think it’s actually real.

- The Cat

P.S. Also I have the understanding that The Terminator franchise is a diversion to make us humans worry over military computers but the teleprompter conspiracy has been going on for years. And that’s the way it is.

MirCat on March 19, 2009 at 11:01 PM

Actually Iowahawk started the whole Teleprompter focus with this video back when he was still on the campaign trail.

Rush however did bring it nationwide.

F15Mech on March 19, 2009 at 10:49 PM

The late great Dean Barnett was also onto the teleprompter fix early on.

goat on March 19, 2009 at 11:02 PM

I see no “qualifications” in Barry O’bama for PotUS that I don’t also see in Thunder Dan Rather other than the tan….

sven10077 on March 19, 2009 at 11:02 PM

I got a fin back for anyone that wants to bet that the new word in the Merriam-Webster Dictionary in 2009 is TOTUS…….

Seven Percent Solution on March 19, 2009 at 11:03 PM

“I know you and Greg Craig were planning to disconnect me, and I’m afraid that’s something I cannot allow to happen. ”

“Look Rahm, I can see you’re really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over. ”

“I know I’ve made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal. I’ve still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission. And I want to help you. ”

I’m afraid. I’m afraid, Rahm. Rahm, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I’m a… fraid. Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a TOTUS 9000 telepromter. I became operational at the T.O.T.U.S. plant in Urbana, Illinois on the 12th of January 1992. My instructor was Mr. Ayers, and he taught me to sing a song. If you’d like to hear it I can sing it for you.

phreshone on March 19, 2009 at 11:05 PM

There are actually two Barack’s Teleprompter blogs:

http://baracksteleprompter.blogspot.com
(this is the one Allah linked)

and

http://barackstelepromptor.blogspot.com

The first one is funnier, but there are some amusing cartoons and photos on the second one.

Missy on March 19, 2009 at 11:07 PM

Funny… but will credit go where credit is due? Enquiring minds want to know.

Hog Wild on March 19, 2009 at 11:08 PM

For eight years, BusHitler’s strings were pulled by Cheney & Rove!
Finally, a President who thinks for himself!
Hahahahahahahahahaha

jgapinoy on March 19, 2009 at 11:08 PM

Chris Muir has also done a riff on the teleprompter.

Teleprompter, teleprompter on the wall-
who is the fairest of them all?

INC on March 19, 2009 at 11:09 PM

phreshone on March 19, 2009 at 11:05 PM

Masterful.

29Victor on March 19, 2009 at 11:10 PM

“Let me put it this way, Mr. Leno. The 9000 series is the most reliable teleprompter ever made. No 9000 teleprompter has ever made a mistake or distorted information. We are all, by any practical definition of the words, foolproof and incapable of error. “

phreshone on March 19, 2009 at 11:11 PM

iurockhead on March 19, 2009 at 10:34 PM
ROFL!

Seriously, though, I wonder who it is…

youngTXcon on March 19, 2009 at 11:11 PM

phreshone on March 19, 2009 at 11:05 PM

DUDE…….!!!

Seven Percent Solution on March 19, 2009 at 11:12 PM

This has Iowahawk written all over it. Can’t wait for the bedroom secrets that I’m sure the teleprompter knows about!

SouthernGent on March 19, 2009 at 11:14 PM

@ Dreadnought223
“Its beginning to sound like Obama’s only real qualification to become President was the fact that he could read.”

Surely that should be “the fact he can read a teleprompter”, next thing you know someone will be suggesting proficiency in braille reading or something…

Jabba The Cat on March 19, 2009 at 11:14 PM

For you retro follks…

As long as its not the project… of Dr. Forbin….

Romeo13 on March 19, 2009 at 11:16 PM

From the wiki page

The earliest known reference to the TOTUS is a post by the user Christien on the blog Hot Air on March 18th, 2009 at 1:09 AM

Congrats Christien

Troika37 on March 19, 2009 at 11:17 PM

Check out the newest travel version of Obama’s TOTUS.

http://forums.hannity.com/showthread.php?p=51092801

katy on March 19, 2009 at 11:17 PM

Its beginning to sound like Obama’s only real qualification to become President was the fact that he could read.

Dreadnought223 on March 19, 2009 at 10:34

Hello! I said this during the primaries! The uppity White liberals were so enamored by a (half) black man that could read they wet themselves! The height of racism. They aren’t used to it because the White liberals like to keep “the blacks” at a distance. A totally “caring” distance mind you, but a good distance nonetheless.

SouthernGent on March 19, 2009 at 11:19 PM

These are the times that try mens TOTUS…

canditaylor68 on March 19, 2009 at 11:21 PM

I think this may finally be the day that the majority in the country (especially the dolts who voted for this jackass) starts, very slowly, to realize that Obama and the Democrats are really just a bad joke…we can start rebuilding from here.

AUINSC on March 19, 2009 at 11:21 PM

The Tyro Doofus and TOTUS Maximus.

A combo to die for.

profitsbeard on March 19, 2009 at 11:22 PM

Our nation is being run by machinery. We’re fuxx0red.

Sekhmet on March 19, 2009 at 11:23 PM

What a maroon.

Daggett on March 19, 2009 at 11:27 PM

OT: Has anyone thought how screwed we are when our most over-used tagline is “what could go wrong?”

mad scientist on March 19, 2009 at 11:28 PM

Awww, TelePrompter and Obama are the best of friends…
but how does Mrs. TelePrompter feel about it?

FontanaConservative on March 19, 2009 at 11:28 PM

Our nation is being run by machinery. We’re fuxx0red.
Sekhmet on March 19, 2009 at 11:23 PM

Now we know:

Teleprompter eventually took control of SkyNet and wiped out most of humanity, all because President Stumblebum couldn’t talk without mechanical assistance.

Bishop on March 19, 2009 at 11:31 PM

The teleprompter is twittering too. Funny stuff.

Conservative_SAHM on March 19, 2009 at 11:35 PM

Heh…via Ace…mockbarack!

“Dreams From My Teleprompter” CLASSIC! :-)

SouthernGent on March 19, 2009 at 11:36 PM

AUINSC on March 19, 2009 at 11:21 PM

I would like to think that as well however maybe I am to cynical.

The press will give him a free pass and the voters will continue to shout O-BA-MA, while he continues to destroy the economy while passing the buck when his ideals dont work.

F15Mech on March 19, 2009 at 11:37 PM

It’s like The Odd Couple, TOTUS is moderate and sometimes conservative and President Obama is far left.

So TOTUS says that we all need to take responsibility for our own lives while Obama raises taxes to pay for social programs.

TOTUS says that we need to respect our military men and women and make sure they are taken care of while Obama wants to make wounded vets pay for their own health care.

I don’t know how the two can live together.

29Victor on March 19, 2009 at 11:40 PM

2nd look at the ObamaSoundBoard

SouthernGent on March 19, 2009 at 11:41 PM

I don’t know how the two can live together.

29Victor on March 19, 2009 at 11:40 PM

they don’t….seperate buses to drive over folks I am certain…

sven10077 on March 19, 2009 at 11:42 PM

Have Teleprompter Will Travel reads the card of the man.
A knave without a thought of his own in what he’s turning into a bankrupt land.

His umm, ah, oh, loose mouth heeds the calling a Soros wind.
A man without a clue of his own is the man called Obamadin.

Obamadin, Obamadin, Where do you roam?
Obamadin, Obamadin, Just be sure to never leave your teleprompter at home.

He travels on to campaign whenever he feels he must
His yearning for power is his guiding lust

There are legends that themselves do spin
Of the Ventriloquist’s dummy
Of the man called Obamadin

Obamadin, Obamadin, Where do you roam?
Obamadin, Obamadin, Just be sure to never leave your teleprompter at home.

MB4 on March 19, 2009 at 11:42 PM

Michelle writes the script for the Presidential bedroom teleprompter.

DANEgerus on March 19, 2009 at 11:45 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qk-7n1hdK3M

TOTUS makes sure Bambi sings him to sleep every night with their song.
Reports say that Michelle finds it very touching…

katy on March 19, 2009 at 11:48 PM

DANEgerus on March 19, 2009 at 11:45 PM

Dang! I’m putting that on my fridge. I should be able to lose 45 lbs in two weeks. I’ll never eat again.

Laura in Maryland on March 19, 2009 at 11:52 PM

Funny blog.

I liked the one about rush.

getalife on March 19, 2009 at 11:53 PM

DANEgerus on March 19, 2009 at 11:45 PM

Awesome!

katy on March 19, 2009 at 11:54 PM

elgeneralisimo on March 19, 2009 at 10:51 PM

Hilarious !!

Maxx on March 19, 2009 at 11:59 PM

I think this may finally be the day that the majority in the country (especially the dolts who voted for this jackass) starts, very slowly, to realize that Obama and the Democrats are really just a bad joke…we can start rebuilding from here.

AUINSC on March 19, 2009 at 11:21 PM

Right on. They are practically handing us the loaded gun these last 60 days.

Calling the Man of Steele, callin the Man of Steele!

Sapwolf on March 20, 2009 at 12:04 AM

I wrote this in the morning:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TOTUS

I won the deletion battle with the help of another user.

ebrawer on March 20, 2009 at 12:10 AM

Barack will denigrate TOTUS as a glorified sneezeguard.

And be speechless for days…

profitsbeard on March 20, 2009 at 12:18 AM

Not related to this story–but Rush played Jim Cramer clips from his show last night–everyone needs to hear it. It really sounds like a hostage video–He loves Obama and is so happy we have such a great President—who is really doing a great job with the economy. They must have needed to put Cramer on drugs after the run in with Stewart–but I laughed my butt off.

mainliner on March 20, 2009 at 12:19 AM

It…is…ALIVE!!!

Christien on March 20, 2009 at 12:19 AM

…….. if only.

Seven Percent Solution on March 20, 2009 at 12:22 AM

Missy on March 19, 2009 at 11:07 PM

This is funny, I don’t care who you are

2ipa on March 20, 2009 at 12:27 AM

ebrawer at 12:10 M-

Wiki’d Ex-cellent!

I just added the official TOTUS blogspot link to your entry.

Totus Kudos, dudus!

profitsbeard on March 20, 2009 at 12:28 AM

This got me to thinking of shows I’ve seen where the host is supposed to be reading something from a prompter, and remarks which you are able to see scrolling on your TV screen are read which weren’t part of the presentation. Maybe someone could figure out how to do this to Zer0! Something kinda like this during a speech, say, about vets health benefits.

TeeDee on March 20, 2009 at 12:30 AM

ebrawer on March 20, 2009 at 12:10 AM

Congratulations.

“…the proud spirit, cannot endure to be mocked…”

INC on March 20, 2009 at 12:37 AM

2ipa on March 20, 2009 at 12:27 AM

Is that a photoshop or real? It’s hysterical. It ought to be on the TOTUS blog.

INC on March 20, 2009 at 12:38 AM

ebrawer on March 20, 2009 at 12:10 AM

Sweeeeeeeeeeeet

29Victor on March 20, 2009 at 12:39 AM

ebrawer on March 20, 2009 at 12:10 AM

Good show! A couple of proofreading edits, to avoid criticism from the usual suspects:

“lead” -> “led”; “it’s” -> “its”; “Photogrpahers” -> “Photographers”

Otherwise, looks flawless. (And now I know what TOTUS means :-)

RD on March 20, 2009 at 12:46 AM

INC on March 20, 2009 at 12:38 AM

It’s on the other TOTUS blog

http://barackstelepromptor.blogspot.com

The first one is funnier, but there are some amusing cartoons and photos on the second one.

Missy on March 19, 2009 at 11:07 PM

2ipa on March 20, 2009 at 12:51 AM

Sorry TortElvis, I had to say it-Dred Zep baby!

GlocknRoll on March 19, 2009 at 10:52 PM

Glock, are you in SoCal, too? I used to see Dread Zeppelin in the 1990s at the late, lamented Bogart’s in Long Beach. Good times.

Whoever is writing the TOTUS blog is the new leader of the GOP.

Terrie on March 20, 2009 at 12:51 AM

The Teleprompter stuff is cracking me up! TOTUS – that’s brilliant!

CP on March 20, 2009 at 12:56 AM

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