Video: Obama cultists cope with victory
posted at 4:50 pm on November 5, 2008 by Allahpundit
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From the Onion’s “Be careful what you wish for” files, what do the apostles do with themselves now that the messiah has ascended into heaven? Spread the good word? “We are the ones we’ve been waiting for” is going to wear awfully thin as gospel by 2010.
I think we can harness them. Remember in “Day of the Dead” how the doctor taught Bub to use a Walkman? All we need is a meaningless affirmation for them to chant. “The Future Is Now”? “Believe In Belief”? “Just Do It”? Might have trademark problems on that last one.
Obama Win Causes Obsessive Supporters To Realize How Empty Their Lives Are
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Too funny.
Ryan Gandy on November 5, 2008 at 5:58 PM
The Onion is probably worried sick about all the major networks elbowing into the fake news market for real, instead of just testing the waters, now that it worked out so well for them – screwing the country that is.
drunyan8315 on November 5, 2008 at 5:58 PM
I know how to spot a Zobamie…
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2008/1105082obamahair1.html
Enoxo on November 5, 2008 at 6:17 PM
” when the messiah speaks……the youth will hear…..” calypso loui Farrakhan 2008 (hussein ’s next door neighbor .
texaninfidel on November 5, 2008 at 6:17 PM
One of my flakier friends from high school is an avid Obama supporter. She’s always spoken of him in very religious terms about how he makes her feel and the hope he gives her.
Today, she posted in her blog that “Change is coming. I don’t know what kind of change….but change is definitely coming and I can’t wait.”
I wanted to throttle her. She (and many more like her) voted for someone because they promised change, but have absolutely no idea what that means. The ones that do ‘know’ what it means only actually know what it means to them. They don’t know what a President Obama is actually planning on doing.
It’s definitely not the way to elect a President. But, apparently, it is the way to get elected as President.
JadeNYU on November 5, 2008 at 6:19 PM
Thanks Onion and HotAir for the video and post. I needed it.
JeffinOrlando on November 5, 2008 at 6:30 PM
A very conservative friend of mine said that we deserve the president we get.
It’s harsh, but I have to admit, she’s right.
tru2tx on November 5, 2008 at 6:33 PM
priceless. don’t miss the crawlers
neal7 on November 5, 2008 at 6:33 PM
ROFL!!! “Human Rights Groups want to Euthanize Obama Supporters”
…sad part is its somewhat true… what with their support for abortion. If the Onion figured that into it, you might see this headline…
“Human Rights Groups want to Euthanize Obama Supporters, and gets them to enthusiastically support paying for the procedures!”
dominigan on November 5, 2008 at 6:35 PM
OMG…priceless. And, yes, I wish they would all die. No, really. I do. Sometimes natural selection just isn’t fast enough.
SouthernGent on November 5, 2008 at 6:37 PM
How these guys from The Onion can do this with a perfectly straight face amazes me!
Absolutely hilarious!
pilamaye on November 5, 2008 at 6:39 PM
I hope the Onion staff doesn’t have any tax liens.
Jim Treacher on November 5, 2008 at 6:42 PM
Yeah, his first thought must have been, “OKAYYYY, well I proved my point, I’m the winner, now I can go ho…..oh shit!”
surrounded on November 5, 2008 at 6:44 PM
I hear “Four legs good, two legs bad!” is popular.
Alex_SF on November 5, 2008 at 6:47 PM
Brains! I need your brain. I can smell your brains.
Chimpy on November 5, 2008 at 6:47 PM
I think we all need to get used to the idea that Hussien is likely to be an American name now too. I wish I could see some humour in that but I don’t.
petunia on November 5, 2008 at 6:53 PM
Yes, Russia has a small sliver of what used to be East Prussia in the old Germany, and it borders Poland and Lithuania. It is not coniguous to Russia proper. It is very close to the border of present day Germany also. To get there by land you’d need to travel from Russia through other countries; BUT it is also accessible by sea, and they are able to stage missiles along with jamming equipment there.
Russia is one of my two biggest International concerns with O’s victory. There are many ethic Russians in most all of the former Soviet Republics, and when they invaded Georgia part of the rationale was to ‘protect ethic Russinas’, right? They could trump up some purported conflict in any one of these other sovereign nations along their western border. I “hope” that O’s administration will be ready for that challenge.
Red State State of Mind on November 5, 2008 at 6:55 PM
Have to say my heart goes out to our military now, since it seems that all their effort and sacrifice will be for nothing.
But my support will remain.
irongrampa on November 5, 2008 at 6:56 PM
Quote of the Day for me. Oh dear God, I feel like the original atheist in a foxhole.
Fortunata on November 5, 2008 at 6:59 PM
I don’t. I hope those Eoroweenies start peeing down their legs and actually realise they have to take responsibility for their own defense.
Fortunata on November 5, 2008 at 7:02 PM
I thought The Onion was supposed to be parody.
Grafted on November 5, 2008 at 7:04 PM
I thoroughly enjoyed The Vast Right Wing conspiracy depolyed against the Clinton Administration and I think I’m going to enjoy even more what the MSM will no doubt consider the Vast Racist Conspiracy when Obama starts revealing his socialist agenda in a way that even his supporters will not be able to rationalize. We may be out of power, but that doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy the inevitable downfall of the Obama Administration.
church on November 5, 2008 at 7:07 PM
Seems like they shot that so it could be used whether Obama won or lost. If he lost, the talking heads would be going on about how Obama supporters don’t know how to deal with his loss.
Tom_Shipley on November 5, 2008 at 7:08 PM
Unfortunately, the nations that I am talking about (Ukraine, the Baltic Republics, Georgia, Poland) aren’t those older democracies that appear to be very complacent and unwilling to stand up to Russia. The newer democracies will truly need our help and they want to be aligned with the US and the West. The peoples in these countries remember what it is like to be dominated by Russia and don’t want that to happen again. They are deserving of our support.
When I read your comment “Euroweenies” I assume you are talking more about the Western European countries who have greatly benefited from our protection since the end of WW2.
Red State State of Mind on November 5, 2008 at 7:20 PM
God how I love the Onion. Only they could make me laugh today.
webproze on November 5, 2008 at 7:24 PM
Yes, although Poland is in the EU, the others aren’t. You’re right, of course.
Fortunata on November 5, 2008 at 7:25 PM
Yeah, I watched a little bit of that one last night (mostly because the premiere was in HD). I just didn’t get why they used so many close ups of the motionless weeping zombies. It was creepy at first but then I was quickly bored.
ScottMcC on November 5, 2008 at 7:35 PM
From your link: “arrested last night on a disorderly conduct rap…”
HAHAHAHAHAHAhaha!!! That’s hysterical! Is that raaaacist?
Feedie on November 5, 2008 at 7:37 PM
That was so funny! Hey all am back!
How did he cut his hair to do that? That is crazy!
sheebe on November 5, 2008 at 7:47 PM
outstanding!
DieHippieDie on November 5, 2008 at 7:59 PM
A psych test is in order. He looks pretty happy in those mug shots.
When did he cast his last presidential ballot?
Feedie on November 5, 2008 at 8:00 PM
WOW! I had to watch it again and again! I emailed to all my friends… I think I’ll watch it again now. It’s only funny cause it’s TRUE!
lanesmerge on November 5, 2008 at 8:48 PM
Gotta love the Onion.
ElectricPhase on November 5, 2008 at 9:04 PM
HYSTERICAL!! To bad ONN or SNL couldn’t have done something like that weeks ago.
THREE MONTHS LATER:
After the vast fog of O’Dumbo’s Great Era of Lowered Expectations finally sets in ….. watch for all the Zombabots to roam the streets, moaning ponderously to every passerby, “Free gas? Free house? Please? Free gas? Free house?”
spaceman spiff on November 5, 2008 at 9:06 PM
I kind of can’t blame the black folks… maybe it’s racist for me to say that but even they admit that they felt like they had no other choice.
But the STUPID idiot white folks who voted for Obama for no other reason other than to feel good about themselves… literally, “wouldn’t it be cool to have a black president” type reasoning.
They – and I guess that means me too – deserve everything that’s coming. We are a nation of morons.
jr.ewing.78 on November 5, 2008 at 9:49 PM
Also, that soviet flag thing HAS to be a purposeful Howard Stern-type goof. It cannot be for real, especially the way that the dude waving it was trying so hard to be on camera and jump around with all of the other Obots.
jr.ewing.78 on November 5, 2008 at 9:51 PM
Gahh, that guy looks like he has a brain tumor protruding subcutaneously.
S on November 5, 2008 at 10:10 PM
egregious!
anti-boomer on November 5, 2008 at 10:16 PM
OBAMA WINS… oh, now what?
RDE2010 on November 5, 2008 at 11:06 PM
The Onion video: hilarious!
The Smoking Gun picture: first time ever that a black man has shaved the name of a white guy into his hair. Now that’s bridging the racial divide!
alflauren on November 5, 2008 at 11:29 PM
Can you imagine the Onion staff meetings?
Mid-Sepetember, 2008:
Editor: Ok, so we have that story about moonbat lunatics trying to prove that Trig Palin isn’t the Governor’s child, right?
Writer 1: Yep, just checked in the draft this morning. Awaiting your approval.
Editor: Awesome, ok now moving onto the Joe Biden accidentally promising that his campaign will bring death and destruction on our time article…
Writer 2: *Kicks open staff room door, out of breath* SULLIVAN *gasp*
Writer 1: What?
Writer 2: ANDREW…. *gasp* SULLIVAN *gasp*
Editor: What about him?
Writer 2: THE… *gasp* PALIN PIECE! *gasp* he beat us to it!
Writer 1: …… Wait…. are…. are you serious?
Editor: THE GODDAMN ATLANTIC, AGAIN!??! JESUS!
Writer 1: … But… this… this is satire… The… The Atlantic… It’s… it’s real news, isn’t it?
Writer 2: HE *gasp* ASKED FOR THE *gasp* BIRTH CERTIFICATE!
Editor: … *looks solemnly out the window, shakes head*
Tacitus_SGL on November 6, 2008 at 2:37 AM
At about 1:05, was that a homeless dude on his resident bench in Ohio?
Bigfoot on November 6, 2008 at 8:32 AM
Change, huh?
Boston, Massachusetts, 1775.
Change.
The Bastille, Paris, France, 1789.
Change.
Talinn, Estonia, 1917.
Change.
Hiroshima, Japan, 1945.
Change.
Berlin, Germany, 1948.
Change.
You should remind your friend to be careful what she asks for – she just might get it.
Rusty Bill on November 6, 2008 at 9:09 AM
that was pretty funny..
RobertCSampson on November 6, 2008 at 11:18 AM
Remember now, onion news network = evil lefty comedy troupe.
I’ve got to say the style of the subsequent SAAB advert just topped it off. Accidentally.
Reaps on November 6, 2008 at 6:37 PM
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