Video: Economic disaster looms as leftist cottage industry collapses
posted at 5:42 pm on September 15, 2008 by Allahpundit
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Vastly more frightening than the Lehman Bros. bankruptcy, and that’s without taking into account the possibility of an Obama victory. What’s going to happen to lefty blog advertising if The One wins and the Pretty Vicious Rants and Important Action Alerts dry up and blow away? It’ll be Dust Bowl II.
And for the rightosphere? A gusher.
To whom can a man with a scorching case of the blog blahs turn in these troubled times? To the Onion, of course.
Economists Warn Anti-Bush Merchandise Market Close To Collapse
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Luck
Fiberals
(witty)
VolMagic on September 15, 2008 at 5:45 PM
Hahaha… a new exercise trend.
thebrokenchair on September 15, 2008 at 5:47 PM
If McCain/Palin win, one cottage industry simply replaces another.
However, the furniture, couches in particular, industry, psychiatry/psychology will flourish.
Entelechy on September 15, 2008 at 5:48 PM
I love the ending bit about exercise trends.
amerpundit on September 15, 2008 at 5:48 PM
Bush derangement’s out
No crying about
McCain/Palin will win
Lefties in dough will swim
Second look at a rout
Entelechy on September 15, 2008 at 5:50 PM
Maybe they can make Sarah Palin dolls to stick pins in or something.
Terrye on September 15, 2008 at 5:52 PM
Nah, I don’t think there is any danger in Bush merchandise falling out of favor. Libs will be screaming about him for the next 500 years.
Star20 on September 15, 2008 at 5:52 PM
My favorite Onion story is where Bush thinks he’s hearing the voice of G-d but it’s actually Cheney on the intercom. During Katrina, G-d is silent (so Bush screws up) because Cheney is on vacation. Great stuff!
Mr_Magoo on September 15, 2008 at 5:52 PM
I like the print on the condoms, haha. Nice ending there too re:Buddha books and exercise, funny.
Spirit of 1776 on September 15, 2008 at 5:53 PM
there still a chance to save the liberals JEB 2012
steviedfromnc on September 15, 2008 at 5:53 PM
They’ll always have Christians.
Ronnie on September 15, 2008 at 5:54 PM
My fav. one is Sen McCain and his would be assasin “trophy wall”/ challenging Obama to jungle tracking in lieu of debates.
Illinidiva on September 15, 2008 at 5:54 PM
That’s what happens when you put all your eggs in one basket!
They should have DONE something in Congress this year, instead of only focusing on anti-Bush.
There could be gold in: WE DEMS ARE LOSERS, AGAIN tees
originalpechanga on September 15, 2008 at 5:56 PM
The Onion is on my cool list because they are usually hilarious and they give it to everybody
titus_pullo on September 15, 2008 at 5:57 PM
My offfice is right across the street from Lehman Bros. The TV newstrucks were parked outside of Broadway all day today with their cameras focused on the Lehman building. On the sidewalk, as employees were carrying out their personal belongings from the building, reporters were harassing them for interviews, while leftist agitators were giving out pre-printed pamphlets trying to get people to revolt or something. It was a complete circus.
I do feel sorry for the people at Lehman to lost their jobs, because their CEO was too stupid to try to get enough liquidity earlier on this year. Even of those guys donated to the Democrats, losing your job for something the higher-ups did isn’t fair.
Sydney Carton on September 15, 2008 at 5:57 PM
Can this site not find an angle on the recent Wall St. developments, or what? This place has been nearly silent on this “cleansing”, as a CNN journo called it this morning.
YYZ on September 15, 2008 at 6:02 PM
There’s no good spin to put on the real world. It’s ugly, it’s getting worse, and it’s not the fault of the Democrats. So it should be ignored.
Corzine talks about some of the fall-out on CNBC:
http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/up/player/popup/?rn=289004&cl=9744119&src=finance&ch=4043681
bayam on September 15, 2008 at 6:05 PM
I’M RUINED!!1one!!
Good Lt on September 15, 2008 at 6:06 PM
Hopefully you’re kidding. Many people were ruined today and many people are going to lose the jobs as a result of what happened today.
bayam on September 15, 2008 at 6:08 PM
Funny! Love it. “We need to find some other sector for marginally politically active liberals to throw their money away on.”
zmrzlina on September 15, 2008 at 6:11 PM
I’m quite sure there will be Sarah Palin dolls to, um, stick, something, uh, pins, yeah, that’s it….
Brisk sales, you betcha.
The Monster on September 15, 2008 at 6:13 PM
One thing I should mention about the Lehman employees: investment bankers are among the last capitalists left on the planet. Seriously, they’re completely engaged with and obsessed with making money. They are all about making deals and finding new opportunities. Now, some people might do that the right way, and some people might do that the wrong way. But they are not socialists, at all. They want to make their pile of cash, and aren’t afraid to tell anyone that’s what they’re doing.
So the Lehman employees to donated to the Democrats are cultural liberals. They probably want abortion to be legal so that when they knock up their secretaries, they won’t have to pay child support.
Sydney Carton on September 15, 2008 at 6:15 PM
I get all my news from the Onion. Only reliable source on the Net.
trailboss on September 15, 2008 at 6:16 PM
Only people who had their life savings in Lehman stock, instead of a diversified portfolio or a mutual fund to minimize the risk of a single investment going south.
Ever hear the saying “don’t put all your eggs in one basket”? Anyone who lacks the judgement to follow that ancient wisdom ought to recuse himself from electing the government that purports to regulate investment markets.
The Monster on September 15, 2008 at 6:23 PM
Gotta love the Onion…fair and unbalanced….
My favorite was an interview with the 9-11 hijackers in Hell…with all the features, presumably, of an Islamic version of Hell (and ol’ Uncle Mo had quite the imagination!)….
…as I remember it, they were all quite upset that, having been promised virgins, they were instead being disembowelled eternally…the interview with one an interruption of the hijacker receiving the intimate attentions of some Islamic bogeyman with…er…hmmm…er…a barbed love minaret….
…gotta love the Onion….
Puritan1648 on September 15, 2008 at 6:27 PM
Ever hear the saying “don’t put all your eggs in one basket”? Anyone who lacks the judgement to follow that ancient wisdom ought to recuse himself from electing the government that purports to regulate investment markets.
I don’t think that’s what he meant by “many people were ruined today.” Say you’re a 45 year old dealmaker who’s worked at Lehman for 15 years. You’re fired. Now you’re too old to start a new career, because nobody hires anyone that old, and you’re too young to retire. What do you do?
Sydney Carton on September 15, 2008 at 6:28 PM
Write 2 memoirs and run for President?
Damiano on September 15, 2008 at 6:36 PM
This is nothing compared to the Clinton era dot com meltdown.
jukin on September 15, 2008 at 6:42 PM
Don’t worry, sounds like Palin will fill the void…
right2bright on September 15, 2008 at 6:45 PM
I’d guess try to get a job at another firm, maybe where the people who have invested through Lehman will move their accounts, perhaps at a somewhat lower salary. That’s not “ruin” though. It’s just a reduction in income.
If that were what he meant, why did he explicitly discuss the people who will lose their jobs?:
My guess is that he’s feeding the fears that people who have invested their money through Lehman will lose their shorts. They haven’t been “ruined”, because they still own the securities they purchased. It’s just the Lehman people (stockholders and employees) who are in big trouble.
The Monster on September 15, 2008 at 6:47 PM
I say jump on the Anti-McCain/Palin bandwagon and invent merchandise to sell to these morons. Make it vile. Illustrate the absurd by being absurd. They’ll buy it because of how vile they are and their vitriol will be announced in full regalia. They’ll never know it was a joke, namely because they don’t have a sense of it.
We’ll all make tons of dough and they’ll be broker as a result of our entrepreneurism.
JP1986UM on September 15, 2008 at 6:47 PM
No, this is a lot worse than the dot com meltdown. The dot com meltdown involved fake companies. The commercial paper the investment banks hold/held are still opaque. No one knows where this is going end.
This could be a lot worse before it gets better. Because the only way the economy will improve is if banks loan out money, and if they don’t have the money to loan out money the economy won’t expand. So lets stop playing partisan politics here. This is a serious problem we are in right now.
Lance Murdock on September 15, 2008 at 6:50 PM
This is nothing compared to the Clinton era dot com meltdown.
jukin on September 15, 2008 at 6:42 PM
You’re right. It’s MUCH, MUCH WORSE.
This is potentially Depression-level bad. Potentially. It remains to be seen how bad things are. The fact that the government is still cooking the accounting books of Freddie/Fannie and not including the 5 trillion guarantee on its books is bad. People are trying to downplay the news, but the bottom line is that the US Taxpayer is on the hook for that 5 trillion of assets, much of which could be bad loans that are worth nothing.
Lehman Bros. had to fail. The irony is, now that Merrill Lynch is merging with Bank of America, and JP Morgan has control of Bear Sterns, there REALLY are companies now that are “too big to fail.” If JP Morgan or Bank of America fail now, then forget it, we’re done.
Sydney Carton on September 15, 2008 at 6:56 PM
Thank God for Onion News. I never realized that there were actually people buying that crap.
TooTall on September 15, 2008 at 7:09 PM
So much for confidence in the American people.
terryannonline on September 15, 2008 at 7:11 PM
Ray Kroc did not own his first McDonalds until he was 51.
Rovin on September 15, 2008 at 7:20 PM
Thank you ROVIN.
saved on September 15, 2008 at 7:27 PM
Problem: there is no fairness involved with having or loosing a job.
Part of the problem in the US (& world) is the idea that it does.
Count to 10 on September 15, 2008 at 9:03 PM
With all due respect Sydney, do you know how infantile this statement sounds? Tangible assets are hardly worth nothing. There are REAL assets that are viable here. “Bad loans” for what? Real property that may be lost by the unqualified owner, but still real property–ASSETS.
Today was a tough day. No one can deny that. But Paulson is on the right track by taking the stand that risk and failure should not be rewarded by bail-outs. Let the market forces take the hit. We all knew this was coming because no one put the hedge-funders in check. Keep the government out of the market and let the chips fall. It may well take more than a year to correct this and a recession may very well be the healthy correction this nation needs, but this is hardly a recipe for a depression.
Rovin on September 15, 2008 at 9:43 PM
What will become of MS-DNC?
Elizabetty on September 15, 2008 at 9:45 PM
I think the answer to that is “Aww, jeeez”.
darkpixel on September 15, 2008 at 9:56 PM
It’s called being realistic, pal. Should one of the those two fall through there is no physical way to recover, especially taken in context of the current disaster that is our nation’s finances.
Brilliant thoughts…except for one thing.
The government IS going to bail them out. Know why? Because tinfoil-hat theories aside, Congress is so in bed with big business they might as well be a mattress. We the people are gonna get stuck with BILLIONS of debt we don’t deserve.
Dark-Star on September 15, 2008 at 10:37 PM
Recipients of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac Campaign Contributions, 1989-2008
Name, Office, State, Party, Grand Total
Dodd, Christopher J S CT D $165,400
Obama, Barack S IL D $126,349
Kerry, John S MA D $111,000
Bennett, Robert F S UT R $107,999
Bachus, Spencer H AL R $103,300
Blunt, Roy H MO R $96,950
Kanjorski, Paul E H PA D $96,000
Bond, Chris S MO R $95,400
Shelby, Richard C S AL R $80,000
Reed, Jack S RI D $78,250
Reid, Harry S NV D $77,000
Clinton, Hillary S NY D $76,050
(McCain is not on the list!)
eea on September 15, 2008 at 10:54 PM
Obama has only been a senator for four years, but he’s #2 in all contributions from Fannie & Freddie for the last ten years.
eea on September 15, 2008 at 10:55 PM