Comments on: Video: Precious national resource threatened by wild overconsumption

By: Wyznowski

Wyznowski — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 16:16:40 +0000

“…profits drilled from her”

Heh…heh…heh…

We haven’t drilled the Cyrus enought yet…when we’ve reduced her to a narcotics addicted porn star, then our task will have been completed.

By: pueblo1032

pueblo1032 — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 14:38:44 +0000

You gotta love THE ONION!!!!

ETCHASKETCHISTAN ??? ABSOLUTE GENIUS!!!

By: Lawrence

Lawrence — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 14:12:54 +0000

And I’m only 20…what’s wrong with me? Or better question: what’s wrong with all of you for being obsessed with this 15 year old?

jimmy the notable on June 30, 2008 at 10:18 PM

Because her fan base is made up mostly of 12-15 year old girls.

By: Bigfoot

Bigfoot — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 13:14:08 +0000

A threat to the national Beer supply would be a crisis.

Right_of_Attila on June 30, 2008 at 10:40 PM

One more reason to vote for McCain, whose wife knows a thing or two about the Beer supply.

By: abcurtis

abcurtis — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 13:04:01 +0000

We’re not obsessed. We have teenage daughters who are though.

BacaDog on June 30, 2008 at 11:42 PM

When my daughter was a teenager she was obsessed with Duran Duran. That was the topic of conversation around my house.
So I can understand what the rest of you are going through with HM.

By: abcurtis

abcurtis — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 13:01:03 +0000

When I first heard Billy Ray “Mullet King” Cyrus’ daughter was famous, I did a double take.

Billy Ray is a no-talent one hit wonder, as opposed to Tim McGraw who is a multi-hit no-talent wonder. Billy Ray ought to be thankful his daughter is able to pay the rent.

By: Swinehound

Swinehound — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 12:53:29 +0000

The Onion; Prophetic parodies?

By: Johan Klaus

Johan Klaus — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 05:59:34 +0000

A threat to the national Beer supply would be a crisis.
.
Right_of_Attila on June 30, 2008 at 10:40 Pm

I am not worried. I live right down the road from the Shiner Brewery.

By: TexasJew

TexasJew — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 05:35:33 +0000

When this bubble bursts, some big names will be taking a bath in oil.

crosspatch on July 1, 2008 at 1:01 AM

Having had to suffer listening to “Ackey Breaky Heart”, I hope its Miley’s dad, And that the oil is lit.

Now, wasn’t that a seamless segue?

By: crosspatch

crosspatch — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 05:01:20 +0000

US fuel consumption in June was down something like 3 or 4 percent from June of last year. Inventories stocks are up. Saudi has said they could pump more oil but their storage is full and there is no backlog of tankers to take it away. The market is fully supplied.

What you have are the investment banks and hedge funds buying oil and storing it as a hedge against the dollar. They are betting the storage cost will be less than the gain from a continuing falling dollar.

They are bailing out of real estate and into oil. Fine … until the Feds raise rates and the dollar rises. Then the price of oil drops and that loss gets added to the storage cost and suddenly you are going to have everyone and their brother trying to unload oil at the same time.

When this bubble bursts, some big names will be taking a bath in oil.

By: Bob's Kid

Bob's Kid — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 03:48:59 +0000

That was pretty funny!

And I couldn’t pick Miley Cyrus out out of a crowd of two.

By: BacaDog

BacaDog — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 03:42:00 +0000

Or better question: what’s wrong with all of you for being obsessed with this 15 year old?

We’re not obsessed. We have teenage daughters who are though.

By: SouthernGent

SouthernGent — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 03:38:50 +0000

Crawler: “McDonald’s add employee benefits to dollar menu”.

HA!

By: ParisParamus

ParisParamus — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 03:36:36 +0000

Etchasketchistan–priceless.

By: Talon

Talon — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:47:59 +0000

My daughter wants ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING “Hannah Montana”..

Maybe I should show her this ONN piece. She’s 8 and will believe it’s real if I tell her it is.

Funny stuff.

By: pedestrian

pedestrian — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:46:57 +0000

The obvious solution is a Strategic Cyrus Reserve that will hold images of a charming and nubile teen that can be drawn down once the original discovery has been depleted. It should also hold a sample of her dna so that when the technology is perfected it can be downloaded into her adoring fans’ chromosomes.

By: Right_of_Attila

Right_of_Attila — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:40:56 +0000

I was worried the resource was beer. Caused a momentary panic.
Sue on June 30, 2008 at 10:35 PM

.
A threat to the national Beer supply would be a crisis.
.
Ms. Cyrus … not so much.

By: profitsbeard

profitsbeard — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:38:56 +0000

Wasn’t this Ted Turner’s position on everything?

By: Sue

Sue — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:35:56 +0000

I was worried the resource was beer. Caused a momentary panic.

By: JimK

JimK — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:34:24 +0000

It’s gonna be OK, they can have my share.

By: rockmom

rockmom — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:25:27 +0000

Frackin hilarious. I love the ONN.

By: TexasJew

TexasJew — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:24:36 +0000

…and after the earthquake, “USA Today to phase out words.”

RBMN on June 30, 2008 at 10:21 PM

I didn’t even know the McPaper used words – just color graphics and leftwing rat pellets.

By: RBMN

RBMN — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:21:25 +0000

…and after the earthquake, “USA Today to phase out words.”

By: Guardian

Guardian — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:19:45 +0000

The teaser at the end for the upcoming story about an earthquake that wiped out etchi-sketchi-stan was frikkin hilarious.

By: jimmy the notable

jimmy the notable — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:18:13 +0000

I have been out of the loop way too long. When I first heard Billy Ray “Mullet King” Cyrus’ daughter was famous, I did a double take. And I’m only 20…what’s wrong with me? Or better question: what’s wrong with all of you for being obsessed with this 15 year old?