Video: The palm frond bandit
posted at 7:00 pm on June 20, 2008 by Allahpundit
Armed robbery, pardner. First-degree felony per section 812.13(2)(b), 30-year sentence per 775.082(3)(b). Was it worth it? For this immortal surveillance cam footage? Hell yes. Click the image to watch.
Blowback
Note from Hot Air management: This section is for comments from Hot Air's community of registered readers. Please don't assume that Hot Air management agrees with or otherwise endorses any particular comment just because we let it stand. A reminder: Anyone who fails to comply with our terms of use may lose their posting privilege.
Trackbacks/Pings
Trackback URL
Comments
Now that’s good for a Friday evening chuckle.
Bob's Kid on June 20, 2008 at 7:05 PM
He simply thought Jesus was coming and wanted to lay them down for the savior.
GoodBoy on June 20, 2008 at 7:07 PM
But I’d rather have…..a shrubbery!
dmh0667 on June 20, 2008 at 7:07 PM
Give me all your money or…or…I’ll shake my palm frond at you again!
flipflop on June 20, 2008 at 7:08 PM
I blame global warming.
furytrader on June 20, 2008 at 7:14 PM
Darwin award, hands down.
Richard Romano on June 20, 2008 at 7:14 PM
This is exactly why every American should own a weed wacker.
Limerick on June 20, 2008 at 7:16 PM
SPCOlympics on June 20, 2008 at 7:17 PM
You know how you’ve screwed up a robbery? When your weapon can be overpowered by a step-stool.
amerpundit on June 20, 2008 at 7:19 PM
That guy is just way ahead of his time…the world’s first ‘Green Gaia Bandit’ strikes. Behold the future and tremble…
AUINSC on June 20, 2008 at 7:21 PM
But, was the frond loaded?
Blake on June 20, 2008 at 7:21 PM
That’s Cornholeio looking for some …. for his bunghole
Kini on June 20, 2008 at 7:23 PM
Yeah, but the owner over-reacted chasing him with that stool.
Lawsuit a’coming.
SteveMG on June 20, 2008 at 7:24 PM
The gun and knife control people will be all over this. Imagine a world where all robberies looked as stupid at that. Just imagine.
pedestrian on June 20, 2008 at 7:25 PM
Same shirt, same motive, but no palm
Kini on June 20, 2008 at 7:27 PM
From my cold green hands….
SteveMG on June 20, 2008 at 7:27 PM
The obvious solution is to remove palms off the street, BTW.
amerpundit on June 20, 2008 at 7:29 PM
Hmm, if you turn one of these in I’m sure some city will spot you a $100.
SteveMG on June 20, 2008 at 7:30 PM
I like how he started to shake the palm in a menacing way when the clerk first told him to take a hike
multiuseless on June 20, 2008 at 7:31 PM
I just had my palm trees trimmed today, so I have quite an armory.
Watch out Dairy Queen, I’m not gonna pay for my Blizzard now!
MamaAJ on June 20, 2008 at 7:38 PM
Florida. Figures. Once again, I bow my head in shame.
lorien1973 on June 20, 2008 at 7:38 PM
Wasn’t there another robber who disguised himself as a tree?
Blake on June 20, 2008 at 7:42 PM
Palm fronds promote crime. Pond fronds kill. Outlaw palm fronds.
Or at least legislate a palm frond registration requirement.
petefrt on June 20, 2008 at 7:52 PM
Not quite “armed robbery”. More like “treed robbery”.
Buford Gooch on June 20, 2008 at 8:03 PM
You just know this criminal is going to branch out to other more violent acts.
Limerick on June 20, 2008 at 8:15 PM
How to stop a bad habit–like stealing–pull it up by the roots.
jgapinoy on June 20, 2008 at 8:22 PM
The is an idiot…he brought a palm branch to a stool fight!
1GooDDaDDy on June 20, 2008 at 8:29 PM
The=He
1GooDDaDDy on June 20, 2008 at 8:30 PM
Fronds don’t let fronds rob stores.
…Sorry.
Rhinoboy on June 20, 2008 at 8:34 PM
The flip-flop attack from the left hand was very interesting.
He aborted early on and put his flip-flops back on during the frond attack.
See? Flipflop smell combined with fronds flapping. It could throw a clerk off their game. Genius!
nottakingsides on June 20, 2008 at 8:58 PM
I thought that was Beavis doing his Cornholio impression. “I AM GHEAT CORNHOLIO
Egfrow on June 20, 2008 at 9:05 PM
ARE YOU THREATENING ME?
Egfrow on June 20, 2008 at 9:06 PM
He was obviously a killer… That palm tree had been dead for days before this robbery. I think that if a tree dies in the course of a felony, the perpetrator can be tried for murder. I’m no “big city” lawyer but I am 100% right on this one.
Claypigeon on June 20, 2008 at 9:41 PM
Maybe that frond had leaf cutter ants on it…or something. C’mon, I gotta give the dude at least the benefit of the doubt.
robblefarian on June 20, 2008 at 9:49 PM
Are you trying to say this fella might be Poison Ivy’s brother?
Limerick on June 20, 2008 at 9:59 PM
That man is a monster, he murdered that poor palm tree and then used it in an attempted robbery. We need a special law that covers this.
Claypigeon on June 20, 2008 at 10:10 PM
Here was a golden oppurtunity for the store
clerk to reach out and grap an olive branch,
and beat this guy senseless!haha.
canopfor on June 20, 2008 at 10:17 PM
Poor Beavis. He’s fallen so far.
Sekhmet on June 20, 2008 at 10:23 PM
The Embosker strikes again.
“Drop the fronds, punk! There’s a sniper outside with a Ficus pointed at your head.”
whitetop on June 20, 2008 at 10:49 PM
Most palm fronds are sharp. Probably cut the hell out of him, as well.
obladioblada on June 20, 2008 at 11:01 PM
Palm fronds don’t kill, people do.
– or –
Guns don’t kill, palm fronds do.
– or –
(insert your favorite here.)
hillbillyjim on June 20, 2008 at 11:18 PM
“Don’t frond me, bro.”
hillbillyjim on June 20, 2008 at 11:22 PM
I believe this poor fellow thought he was shielding his face from the video camera. Either that or auditioning for “Gilligan’s Island: The Movie”.
hillbillyjim on June 20, 2008 at 11:32 PM
Give me all your money or I’ll give you such a pinch!
stonemeister on June 21, 2008 at 12:07 AM
When palms are outlawed, only outlaws will carry palms.
dont taze me bro on June 21, 2008 at 12:45 AM
He should do his time at 29 Palms.
Mojave Mark on June 21, 2008 at 12:59 AM
He’ll be known as rosie PALM in prison.
joeswampy on June 21, 2008 at 8:43 AM
Oh God please stop it, my face hurts.
You guys have me rofl.think I might have pulled a groin
gzelmiami on June 21, 2008 at 10:00 AM
And people wonder why Fark has a “Florida” category. See also. Florida represent!
Mark Jaquith on June 21, 2008 at 1:56 PM
hahahaa
becki51758 on June 22, 2008 at 7:16 AM
Hey Allah: Get a new g-damb word will you.
Nuance.
Story:
Building blown up in New York.
Allah-P:
Nuance.
Story:
Fifteen soldires killed by an IED:
Allah-P:
Nuance.
Story:
Allah-P burned alive in his car.
Revolution:
Nuance.
revolution on June 22, 2008 at 10:33 AM