Video: If life was like Facebook
posted at 10:07 am on May 2, 2008 by Allahpundit
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Not as good as College Humor’s justly famous “if life was like comment streams” series, but good enough for Friday. So pervasive has FB become that even an avowed abstainer like me got most of the allusions.
Karol’s tried at least three times to get me to sign up but hasn’t yet given me a coherent reason why I should. You people don’t actually use this dopey thing, do you? What am I missing?
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You won’t find Maxx on Facebook.
Maxx on May 2, 2008 at 10:10 AM
I use it, but only as a way to post my pictures online for free and to keep in touch with people who moved out of state.
Esthier on May 2, 2008 at 10:16 AM
I’m actually glad I watched that to know to watch out for adding just anyone. I used to do that when I used Facebook without thinking twice about the consequences.
Typhonsentra on May 2, 2008 at 10:18 AM
Nothing. nothing at all. believe me. I almost got fired because of FB. Not cool.
Yitzchokm on May 2, 2008 at 10:20 AM
The only time I’m on Facebook is when I go on my 14 year old daughter’s laptop (she has no idea I have her password) to see what the hell she has been up to. I’m telling all you parents, you have no idea what these kids are doing, saying, thinking and contemplating. I’ve been successful in directing her away from potential trouble without letting her know I have been snooping. If your teens have unfettered access for hours at a time, be sure they’re up to no good.
Syd B. on May 2, 2008 at 10:23 AM
OMG. That was one of the most hilarious videos I have EVER seen. Okay, probably not…but it was hilarious.
As for the FB video…I don’t use FB, but I got all of the references. It seems like everyone within 5 feet of a computer is on Facebook. What I wished the video had gone after were the people that exclusively use FB and look down on the people who exclusively use MySpace. It’s crazy.
malan89 on May 2, 2008 at 10:23 AM
So did I, when they saw my bikini photos.
Tzetzes on May 2, 2008 at 10:23 AM
Ugh, I will never get a Facebook account. For many reasons. Even if you ultimately delete your account, Facebook still has it. And like this parody shows, all your friends still will have everything from you.
I’ll just keep my MySpace. If you find you need to delete your account, all the messages you’ve sent out, bulletins, comments get deleted with you.
JetBoy on May 2, 2008 at 10:24 AM
I actually use it. :( You’re missing everything the guy at the door in the video was missing. It’s kind of hard to explain, in a Plato’s Cave sort of way.
The video was rad.
OneGyT on May 2, 2008 at 10:25 AM
I finally did sign up, at age 51, where I joined aunts and uncles much older than I, cousins my age, relatives and friends in other countries, and hordes of the younger generation. It’s goofy, but fun.
Parents ought to do it to keep tabs on their kids, no lie–that and myspace, depending on what their kids are using.
Bob's Kid on May 2, 2008 at 10:29 AM
Ah ha! Finally something that Allahpundit and I can agree on, abstaining from Facebook.
(Actually do agree a lot, but sometimes I wonder…)
kirkill on May 2, 2008 at 10:32 AM
Duh!
malan89 on May 2, 2008 at 10:33 AM
Yep, that video basically sums up Facebook. I use it, but it’s not the center of my life like a lot of people use it.
Lance Murdock on May 2, 2008 at 10:38 AM
Beta males abstain from Facebook, too, eh?
Not really. I’ll bet there’s a beta male group we could join.
Attila (Pillage Idiot) on May 2, 2008 at 10:41 AM
We tried that, but we couldn’t get anyone to step up to lead it.
James on May 2, 2008 at 10:45 AM
I was an abstainer too until a few weeks ago. It really is great Allah. It’s a mix of blogging and messaging, all in one place. You should definitely join and let us know.
Baphomet on May 2, 2008 at 10:48 AM
I’ve got one. It’s essentially part of the college registration process now. As soon as you are done registering for your first classes, attractive coeds convince you you need something called “Fayy-sbook” to make it through college. So far I’m still going to graduate in June….maybe they were right….must…poke…girlfriend…
PaisleyCow on May 2, 2008 at 10:53 AM
You Tube, Facebook, MySpace….. are places you’ll never see me initiate a spot to be.
MNDavenotPC on May 2, 2008 at 10:53 AM
Hahah, that video was awesome. But you should still join Facebook, Allah. No one has embarrassing pictures of you, you don’t have to friend anyone you don’t want and you don’t even have to use your real name. Just give it a shot, if you don’t like it, you can delete your page.
Karol on May 2, 2008 at 11:09 AM
What you’re missing is a lot of trouble. That’s pretty much all it’s brought my kids.
Don’t bother.
drjohn on May 2, 2008 at 11:14 AM
Basically what you said was “Join Allah, you don’t have any friends that care that much about you”.
That not right…
right2bright on May 2, 2008 at 11:17 AM
Yeah, but again — why? What am I getting from this dopey site that I’m not getting from IM or e-mail?
Allahpundit on May 2, 2008 at 11:18 AM
Facebook used to be pretty cool – until they opened it to the world. Now it’s just ridiculous.
amkun on May 2, 2008 at 11:19 AM
This isn’t true. You can deactivate your account, but they still have everything stored on their servers. Facebook claims to be working on adding a delete option, but that was since a few months ago.
amkun on May 2, 2008 at 11:23 AM
Wasn’t there a video of people in a waiting room taking about who they “weren’t”? Stating the fact that you never really know who you are talking to on the web.
right2bright on May 2, 2008 at 11:23 AM
Allah, you don’t understand! It’s “social networking”. It’s the next big thing!!!
You see, you’ll be able to “network” “socially” and by doing this all kinds of new killer apps wills be developed so that you can have a “social” “network” and be more efficient as you “network” “socially”.
It’s really cool, and that you don’t understand is troubling to me.
(just envision lots of finger-quotes and a big sarc tag)
(no, you’re not missing anything).
kutabeach on May 2, 2008 at 11:40 AM
I use Facebook and MySpace. I found lots of School friends I had lost contact with along with a long lost nephew. I had known some of these people since kindergarten.
My mom was an avid picture taker and I was able to share pics she took of them at age 6 at birthday parties and school functions. (we are 46 years old now)
We are enjoying our time together and have gotten together twice so far. We have another party in the planning.
True that there is a ton of trash on MySpace and Facebook but it’s neat if you just want to find old friends and ignore the rest.
GoodBoy on May 2, 2008 at 11:48 AM
Forgot to add.. I have lots of younger youth from church etc..on both the site’s. It’s fun to see what they have to say. I can rat on them to their parents at anytime. It’s great when I need someone to cut the grass or have other household chores done. ;)
GoodBoy on May 2, 2008 at 11:52 AM
I’m 40, Facebook no way. I’ve got a buddy who’s wife unfortunately left him. He’s a good guy, he’s turned to Facebook to get in with the younger crowd while he dates. It’s pretty odd. Keeps trying to get me to join. It’s just too much info out there.
I’m waiting for a study that links MySpace, Facebook, etc. to rise in AIDS and other STDs. Hedonism gone mad. Don’t we have enough of this already from liberals and their Hollywood culture?
JeffB. on May 2, 2008 at 11:54 AM
some political campaigns have facebook profiles, as does Shire Network News (best podcast EVAHHH).
It’s good for event invitations, like sporting events.
You can form “networks” of friends, which is a handy sorting feature.
Not as pretty as MySpace, but everything can’t be all glitter and unicorns now, can it?
dm60462 on May 2, 2008 at 12:01 PM
The only reason I will ever know anything about or go onto either FaceBook or MySpace is if they are still around when my 3-year-old is of age to get on. I hope to raise him well enough to:
1. Create and maintain friendships the old-fashioned way (in person)
2. Know that the computer is a tool for many things, but as with any tool, there is the potential to get injured
It never ceases to amaze me when I read the amount of personal data put on their pages. Thinkgs you would never tell a stranger.
ej_pez on May 2, 2008 at 12:19 PM
Nationally known blogger worried about missing out on something because he doesn’t have a facebook page.
priceless.
pedestrian on May 2, 2008 at 12:20 PM
My 30-something twin daughters finally got me to sign up, but the only thing I’ve done there is to tell them to remove my name from the photo they put up. I told them I can’t afford a bodyguard. My daughters have fun on Facebook. They play word games, trivia games, send bumper stickers and other “gifts.” My grandson just added a childhood playmate he’d had when he lived with us. As with anything else, you get out of it what you put into it. My husband put down that I am his spouse and when asked to confirm, I didn’t. ;)
The “kids” have fun with it. I visit Facebook about once a month.
Connie on May 2, 2008 at 12:21 PM
You’ll never find me on Facebook or any similar venue.
Why expose yourself to shallow people and identity thieves?
landlines on May 2, 2008 at 12:39 PM
It’s a convenient way to share all sorts of crap – photos, videos, blog posts, meetups, plans, personal information – very, very easily and in a way that it’s hidden from the average stranger (as long as that stranger isn’t an application writer). Because of this, some people use it as a replacement for personal and group emails, meaning that you’ve got to be on it if you have a significant number of friends of college age. Or, now, high school and younger, as parents are finding out.
calbear on May 2, 2008 at 12:45 PM
I have a facebook account but really don’t use it much. I kind of hate it. I also have myspace and am on it a little more. I really don’t understand the obsession. My girlfriend is on Myspace almost all day and I make fun of her for it. There really isnt any reason to be on there more than 30 minutes a day.
Erockk on May 2, 2008 at 12:48 PM
I have and use facebook. It is a great tool for keeping in touch with people as long as you are not stupid about it. Basically approach it this way, if the information is not something that you would stand up and share with a group of people or publish in a newspaper, DON’T PUT IT ON FACEBOOK!! Be careful who you decide to let be your “friend” I only add people I know personally.
Govgirl on May 2, 2008 at 1:57 PM
So, which one are you?
Ruth Ann Minner Delaware
Linda Lingle Hawaii
Jennifer Granholm Michigan
Janet Napolitano Arizona
Kathleen Sebelius Kansas
M. Jodi Rell Connecticut
Christine Gregoire Washington
Sarah Palin Alaska
Hey, who knew we had eight current female governors in this “evil misogynist” country?
Al in St. Lou on May 2, 2008 at 4:03 PM
I don’t post personal information about myself on the internet, ever. That would kind of rule out Facebook.
Buford on May 2, 2008 at 5:12 PM
I met a guy during the OTC in Houston.
That bastard sent me tons of stupid email crap for months It all stopped when I sent him this File that was labeled Britny Spears doing it and the audio starts out so low that you have to crank up your speakers, then it blurts out “I Love Gay Porn”
Ha ha ha I think the turd got fired for it.
TheSitRep on May 2, 2008 at 5:59 PM
hehe reminds me of what I did to one of my old bosses. Except that I signed up his work e-mail addy for the gay porn.
Then I got on websites and ordered samples for pantyhose and stuff. So he got all kinds of lovely junk mail.
It worked well cause I changed his name from Robert to Roberta. People started to think he had a strange private life.
- The Cat
MirCat on May 2, 2008 at 6:24 PM
I think The Boss has a Facebook. Why don’t you ask her why she uses it?
Mark V. on May 2, 2008 at 7:16 PM
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