Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does whatever a UNuch can’t

posted at 9:25 pm on December 27, 2007 by Bryan

This is a waste of a perfectly good ficticious super hero.

In a move reminiscent of storylines developed during the World War II, the U.N. is joining forces with Marvel Comics, creators of Spider-Man and the Incredible Hulk, to create a comic book showing the international body working with superheroes to solve bloody conflicts and rid the world of disease.

The UN has to resort to fiction to bolster its image because a book about the UN doing any good would by definition have to be a work of fiction.

The comic, initially to be distributed free to 1 million U.S. schoolchildren, will be set in a war-torn fictional country and feature superheroes such as Spider-Man working with U.N. agencies such as Unicef and the “blue hats,” the U.N. peacekeepers.

Why not set the book in an actual war-torn country and highlight the heroic acts of real, actual US military men and women to help the people who live there? There is no shortage of those real heroes. We don’t need to credit their deeds to made-up comic book characters.

But for the UN to do that would be to admit that there are real heroes in the world that the UN has done all it can to oppose. So there goes that.

In the whole story about the UN enlisting Spider-Man et al to burnish its pathetic image, we get one bit of truth.

Although the U.N. did not come up with the initiative, the measure could help revive the body’s troubled image in the U.S., where relations have been strained, in particular during president Bush’s administration.

John Bolton, the former U.S. ambassador to the U.N., once said that “if the U.N. building in New York lost 10 stories, it wouldn’t make a bit of difference.”

They should make a comic book about a super hero called Mustache Man. I just might buy that one.


Related Posts:

Breaking on Hot Air

Blowback

Note from Hot Air management: This section is for comments from Hot Air's community of registered readers. Please don't assume that Hot Air management agrees with or otherwise endorses any particular comment just because we let it stand. A reminder: Anyone who fails to comply with our terms of use may lose their posting privilege.

Trackbacks/Pings

Trackback URL

Comments

So, the point of the comic is that the UN cannot handle its primary function and needs an external body (in this case, a superhero) to help out?

Yeah; that about sums up my opinion of them, actually.

lorien1973 on December 27, 2007 at 9:27 PM

Wait…those comic book heroes actually fought in hand-to-hand combat. How does that relate to the UN?

JetBoy on December 27, 2007 at 9:30 PM

The U.N fights hand to hand, when they are raping the people they are supposed to protect.

paulsur on December 27, 2007 at 9:37 PM

MUSTACHE MAN

I love it.

Baphomet on December 27, 2007 at 9:37 PM

So will there be a USELESSBEAUROCRATMAN who sucks the life out of small countries or BRIBERYMAN who always have one hand out ?

IS tat the heroes or the villans ?

William Amos on December 27, 2007 at 9:40 PM

Mustache Man, Mustache Man….does whatever a eUNuch can’t.

Which of the Marvel heroes gets to be the rapist in this sad tale?

Kid from Brooklyn on December 27, 2007 at 9:40 PM

I suggest the Blue Hats wear uniforms consisting of kilts and sneakers, so they can crap and run at the same time.

Patrick S on December 27, 2007 at 9:42 PM

those comic book heroes actually fought in hand-to-hand combat.

Slap fight!

lorien1973 on December 27, 2007 at 9:42 PM

When does UNMan come to the rescue of poor taxpayerman when hillarosis infects the US ?

William Amos on December 27, 2007 at 9:43 PM

The UN cares enough to rape the locals, unlike those devious Israeli soldiers.

raybury on December 27, 2007 at 9:44 PM

JC Denton knows how to handle the UN.

BDavis on December 27, 2007 at 9:44 PM

Deus Ex reference caught!

Greetings, fellow nerd

Baphomet on December 27, 2007 at 9:46 PM

Wait….are you saying that the comic artist communities are aligned with the left? The one-worlders? That they have decided to use their considerable clout to promote hugs and S’mores for everyone?

Frank Miller will take care of that.

Limerick on December 27, 2007 at 9:49 PM

“With great power comes great responsibility.” Oh wait..

aengus on December 27, 2007 at 9:49 PM

So spiderman rapes some indigenous folk while the Hulk pilfers money from various programs?

muyoso on December 27, 2007 at 9:49 PM

Im shocked we dont hear from “greenman” about the evil threat to the world from Bush’s global warming war machine

William Amos on December 27, 2007 at 9:50 PM

So spiderman rapes some indigenous folk while the Hulk pilfers money from various programs?

muyoso on December 27, 2007 at 9:49 PM

Could be worse could be “blimpman” who runs around spouting hotair and forces the world to live by the gold standard and is head of the Hateamerica cult.

William Amos on December 27, 2007 at 9:52 PM

Sounds like a fantasy plot from the left,
and now Spider Mans image will forever be
b!stardized,I wonder who the villians will
be,(besides America and Israel).

Since this brilliant idea of Spidy helping out
the UN,the lead should go to Sean Penn!

canopfor on December 27, 2007 at 9:53 PM

I can’t wait for the episode where the Incredible Hulk picks up the UN complex on his back and takes it to it’s new home in Moscow…

Zorro on December 27, 2007 at 9:53 PM

Maybe not “hate America”, but more of “accept responsibility for our role in things” America.

muyoso on December 27, 2007 at 9:53 PM

What better way to convince the world that letting the UN act as the planetary government would be oh so wonderful.

Next? Bono writes, UN so good for you.

Speakup on December 27, 2007 at 9:55 PM

The UN has to resort to fiction to bolster its image because a book about the UN doing any good would by definition have to be a work of fiction.

Not entirely true, there’s iodizing salt. Although Kiwanis International did most of it on their own, the UN helps…

Now on to the obvious cheap shots…

So, who’s gonna in charge of the UN League ?

Will it be Pimp Man, who forces teenage children into a fulfilling life of prostitution for food.

Will it be Black Market Man, who steals supplies destined for the destitute and sells it to them at onerous prices ?

Or will it be Diplomatic Bureaucrat, with her overweening sense of entitlement ?

And will they team up with Captain Euro ?

elgeneralisimo on December 27, 2007 at 9:55 PM

Usually Id feel sorry for someone as senile as Ron Paul but being senile isnt an excuse to be so stupid

William Amos on December 27, 2007 at 9:56 PM

Well, the Hulk movie sucked and Spiderman 3 was terrible too. So as long as they use the movie versions of those otherwise groovy superheroes and it will be very appropriate.

By the way, no Captain America????? color me SOOOO surprised.

Dirthead on December 27, 2007 at 9:56 PM

So now we’ve got this 4-color crap to go with Captain Euro and the liberal EU comic book. Great. But you know it has to be fantasy, because in those books liberalism isn’t completely useless for solving real-world problems.

Mustache Man, on the other hand, would be unstoppable.

ReubenJCogburn on December 27, 2007 at 9:58 PM

@ William Amos on December 27, 2007 at 9:56 PM

Weird, I find the other candidates stupid for how fake they are and how naive they at least claim to be with some of their ascertations. Its one thing to be patriotic, which is good, but its another thing entirely to completely deny any wrongdoing by your country alltogether.

muyoso on December 27, 2007 at 10:00 PM

Oh I can’t wait for the game version of this
to be released.(Sarc).

canopfor on December 27, 2007 at 10:00 PM

Obviously this is a U.N. false-flag operation to take our minds off the fact the Batman kicked Superman’s fanny so bad they had to put him in a box.

TIME FOR ANOTHER LOOK AT BRUCE WAYNE!

Limerick on December 27, 2007 at 10:04 PM

The comics industry of today looks nothing like the industry of the 30s, 40s and 50s. They’ve been doing stuff like this for years.

Canadian Imperialist Running Dog on December 27, 2007 at 10:09 PM

“Why not set the book in an actual war-torn country and highlight the heroic acts of real, actual US military men and women to help the people who live there?”
.
I believe, back in the 1990s, there was a Superman comic in which Superman warned Bosnian kids not to play with landmines. But I think it was a NATO publication rather than something put out by the UN.
.
No, I’m dead wrong:
http://www.unicef.org/newsline/super.htm
.
“Monday, 21 October 1996: It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s Superman to the rescue of children threatened by landmines! United States First Lady Hillary Rodham Clinton launched Superman: Deadly Legacy at a White House ceremony today featuring the Man of Steel promoting landmine awareness in Bosnia and Herzegovina.”
.
DC Comics published the comic book in cooperation with the US Department of Defense and UNICEF.
.
So there’s a recent precedent, anyway. I have not read the comic; I do not know if Superman saves the children as if by magic, or if he highlights the work of NATO’s bomb disposal people. Rather than e.g. UN and EU bomb disposal people, who presumably sat at home in Belgium and twiddled their thumbs whilst Muslims and non-Muslims alike were massacred.

Apeking on December 27, 2007 at 10:27 PM

Although the U.N. did not come up with the initiative, the measure could help revive the body’s troubled image in the U.S., where UN corruption has been exposed relations have been strained, in particular during president Bush’s administration.

Much better

broker1 on December 27, 2007 at 10:32 PM

This is so very nice to see. The U.N. spreading propoganda lies to millions of US children.

Who are they gonna get pointers from, Nahoul the cat abusing bee?

tripster on December 27, 2007 at 10:38 PM

Isn’t the UN already a subsidiary of Marvel Comics?

petefrt on December 27, 2007 at 10:46 PM

It’s all make believe anyway.

Kini on December 27, 2007 at 10:59 PM

@ William Amos on December 27, 2007 at 9:56 PM

Weird, I find the other candidates stupid for how fake they are and how naive they at least claim to be with some of their ascertations. Its one thing to be patriotic, which is good, but its another thing entirely to completely deny any wrongdoing by your country alltogether.

muyoso on December 27, 2007 at 10:00 PM

OK tell me Muyoso why saudi terrorists like Bin Laden are upset with the US over the 1953 Coup in Iran ?

Or tell me why Iran is upset over US troops protecting Saudi Arabia from saddam’s armies ?

That is the Ron Paul Logic that we give them reason. But the 1953 Coup was to prevent the Soviets from taking over and enslaving Iranians and US troops in Saudi Arabia protected Saudis from being enslaved by saddam.

We protected those people from a far greater evil. SO yes I think the US should accept praise for all the fgood we did to step in and save these people. Just because a nutcase like the Ayatollah or Osama Bin Laden get upset doesnt make it a mistake or something the US did wrong

William Amos on December 27, 2007 at 11:04 PM

Why not set the book in an actual war-torn country and highlight the heroic acts of real, actual US military men and women to help the people who live there?

What’s stopping the US Military from doing that, then?

Reaps on December 27, 2007 at 11:12 PM

What will Spidey do if he finds out that Aunt May was a mule for Saddam in carrying the bribe money to the UN officials?

Mallard T. Drake on December 27, 2007 at 11:50 PM

Why does it have to be Spider MAN?

SouthernGent on December 27, 2007 at 11:50 PM

Really suprised they don’t have superheros slapping George Bush around about Global Warming!

conservnut on December 27, 2007 at 11:51 PM

I object to giving little children UN porn. Have we lost all sense of decency? Our children need the more realistic fiction of Edgar Rice Burroughs–for instance The Gods of Mars, in which the adherents of an evil religion get what they deserve. (Burroughs was also the creator of Tarzan.)

thuja on December 27, 2007 at 11:56 PM

F teh UN

AZCON on December 28, 2007 at 12:05 AM

So Spidey is going to team with Child-Rapist Man? Ready to disarm the good-guys with proclamations?

Able to intercept Aid money in a single bound?

To leap over the facts to impose Socialism to save the planet from Global Warming?

DANEgerus on December 28, 2007 at 12:09 AM

Heh… Why am I not surprised…? If the UN is going to use ANYONE for their image changes, it should be the ‘Heels’ of the pro-wrestling world, pretending to attack innocent civilians and hamstrung, blue-helmeted peace-keepers with the ‘Faces’ pretending to defend and/or avenge them. The UN is desperate and has to get the youth of the USA behind it if they ever expect to return to any respectable level of legitimacy. I’m only surprised that the U.S. Congress and POTUS are willing to allow such an insurrection.

Rugged Individual on December 28, 2007 at 12:40 AM

The UN cares enough to rape the locals, unlike those devious Israeli soldiers.

raybury on December 27, 2007 at 9:44 PM

Quote on the mark.

thejackal on December 28, 2007 at 12:44 AM

I wish the UN was a comic book entity.

reaganaut on December 28, 2007 at 1:21 AM

The UN has to resort to fiction to bolster its image because a book about the UN doing any good would by definition have to be a work of fiction.

This sentence is so tortured even Alberto Gonzales wouldn’t allow it to be used in Guantanamo.

Nonfactor on December 28, 2007 at 1:34 AM

Reminds me of the 90s when DC Comics had Green Arrow running around proclaiming the evils of the Second Amendment since it made perfect sense for a guy who goes around shooting villains with a bow and arrow to lecture others on the evils of carrying a gun for self-defense.

Perhaps they should call this the Legion of UN-Heroes.

Rip Ford on December 28, 2007 at 2:30 AM

Who better to talk about the side effects of biological warfare than spiderman?

rbb on December 28, 2007 at 6:22 AM

They should make a comic book about a super hero called Mustache Man. I just might buy that one.

Geraldo?

srhoades on December 28, 2007 at 7:38 AM

Yeah, but Green Arrow’s character in the 1990′s was that of a far left radical who lived by his own personal so it made sense.

Marvel is super far left these days. The recent tradepaperback of Ultimates 2 Vol 2 has Captain America, Iron Man et al fighting an invasion of super villains whose purpose for attacking the US is to SAVE RUSSIA, CHINA, NORTH KOREA and IRAN FROM AMERICAN FOREIGN POLICY!!!!!!!!!

At the end of the issue, the Marvel Heroes proclaim they will never help the US government again because IT IS THE USA’S FAULT THAT THE SUPER VILLAINS ATTACKED BECAUSE THE USA THREATENS THE WORLD (!) Captain America basically says something to th effect of “If this is the type of destruction AMERICA brings about then I will not work for the US government anymore.”

GogglesPisano on December 28, 2007 at 7:45 AM

Where’s HATE when you need them?

ZK on December 28, 2007 at 8:23 AM

I can’t wait for the episode when Spiderman breaks up the child prostitution ring that’s run by the UN staff.

CarpeCanis on December 28, 2007 at 8:25 AM

Wait….are you saying that the comic artist communities are aligned with the left? The one-worlders? That they have decided to use their considerable clout to promote hugs and S’mores for everyone?

Frank Miller will take care of that.

Frank Miller is the exception. The comic book community is mostly liberal, and always has been.

Green Arrow is basically an overgrown hippie, and has been since he lost his fortune in the 1970s (or was it the 60s?). There was a famous long-running series written by Denny O’Neil that portrayed Green Arrow as the super-left liberal, and Green Lantern as the staunch conservative (who was always heartless and wrong, natch). The series included race riots, class warfare, and the heroin addiction of Speedy, Green Arrow’s ward and sidekick. And when I was a teenager, I thought it was the most meaningful thing I’d ever read in a comic. It was even better than the Lois Lane issue where she went into some kind of machine that turned her black so she could experience racism. (I kid you not.)

I’ve grown up. But the liberal bent of comics remains.

Meryl Yourish on December 28, 2007 at 9:02 AM

I watched a short clip with the creator of those characters, and he seems to attach himself to Liberal goings on.

On September 11, 2001 one of my reactions was wondering where all the super-heroes were on that day? Weird reaction from a grown man, but I guess after watching and growing up with that type of persona, your brain goes there when things are out of control. The fact is, there are no super heroes, but why should that stop the UN from fabricating more manure with a Liberal author?

The closest thing to super-heroes turned out to be the American military and their Commander In Chief, and we all know how they are the arch rival of the UN.

Hening on December 28, 2007 at 9:02 AM

Im shocked we dont hear from “greenman” about the evil threat to the world from Bush’s global warming war machine

William Amos on December 27, 2007 at 9:50 PM

We did. Marvel created Captain Planet about 16 years ago. Oddly enough it never caught on…

Brass Pair on December 28, 2007 at 9:17 AM

I watched a short clip with the creator of those characters, and he seems to attach himself to Liberal goings on.

Stan Lee and his business partner, Peter Paul, are connected to the Clintons.

Rip Ford on December 28, 2007 at 9:33 AM

SECOND LOOK AT THE JUSTICE LEAGUE

BKennedy on December 28, 2007 at 9:50 AM

The UN cares enough to rape the locals, unlike those devious Israeli soldiers.

raybury on December 27, 2007 at 9:44 PM

nailed it.

I have three more things to say:

1. Marvel, you are dead to me.

2. How does G.I. Joe figure into all this?

3. When the Hulk Hogan action figure joins the U.N., I’m going into the bunker.

TexasDan on December 28, 2007 at 10:27 AM

Ummm… and just who is going to pay for the Printing and distribution of this trash??

And just why give it to American School Children? Isn’t that a pretty blatant attempt at propoganda towards our young? FROM THE UN?

Wow….

Romeo13 on December 28, 2007 at 10:35 AM

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Why would the U.N. need help from anyone? Aren’t they all-wise, all-knowing, all-powerful and able to leap over doing what’s right in a single bound?

Numenorean on December 28, 2007 at 10:47 AM

1) The UN is a boy’s club for thugs and villains. They cater to the whims of terror regimes, their “troops” plunder as often as they protect, and they whine constantly about how useless everyone else is, when everyone else is actually doing the work. Don’t forget that when they arrived at the Tsunami relief area, days after the US, Australia, Japan and even Israel had started the heavy-lifting needed to help people, their first complaint was that hotel service wasn’t good enough.

2) Comic books have been stumbling down into the abyss since the late 80s, largely due to an influx of moonbat art-college graduates who cared less about comics than they did their own agendas. Both the artistic quality and the morality of the comic world have been in a steep slide ever since.

3) Obviously, there had to be a point where the two could get together and wallow in their mutual filth.

4) Why do I sound like my Grandfather? :)

Merovign on December 28, 2007 at 3:48 PM

The Spiderman we know and love from the comics would be put on trial by the U.N. for crimes against humanity if he were real.

We should UNdo ourselves from the UN.

Mojave Mark on December 28, 2007 at 9:02 PM

Marvel kills off Captain America then turns Spiderman into a UN Shill. Conspiracy or just good business. After all Marvel gets to have one million Spiderman comics distributed for free. One million must come to a pretty penny in Marvel’s pocket.

And the best news is that US money will probably pay for the comic.

davod on December 29, 2007 at 7:00 AM

“Marvel is super far left these days. The recent tradepaperback of Ultimates 2 Vol 2 has Captain America, Iron Man et al fighting an invasion of super villains whose purpose for attacking the US is to SAVE RUSSIA, CHINA, NORTH KOREA and IRAN FROM AMERICAN FOREIGN POLICY!!!!!!!!!”

The only thing new about this is that the fellow travellers, who hate the idea of a strong America (Unless it acts like a paper tiger), are outing themselves. The communists did quite well in the 60s and 70′s using comic like pamphlets for propoganda. Only those days the pamphlets were usualy found in the local East Wind bookshop.

Now we have the mainstream comic community spitting in the face of America.

No wonder they are giving the comics away.

davod on December 29, 2007 at 7:11 AM

The Spiderman we know and love from the comics would be put on trial by the U.N. for crimes against humanity if he were real.

We should UNdo ourselves from the UN.

Mojave Mark on December 28, 2007 at 9:02 PM

I will second the vote, or evev thrird fouth and fifth. Power == coruption it it all their like a bad Dallas episode except it is real.
I liked watching the shows before but as you age you perceptions shift and you see things in a different way.

draeknet on December 30, 2007 at 11:19 PM