Video: Presenting the Dorkmobile

posted at 6:10 pm on October 31, 2007 by Allahpundit

All that’s missing is the Tron costume. Not even Brad Pitt could get any action driving this spaz-trap, which means they can only be marketing it to three groups: (1) celibate men, (2) female motorcyclists worried about the wind’s effect on their hair, and (3) enviroturds, lured by the promise of a clean, green 100 mpg. The left loves to whine about how Bush never asked the country for any sacrifices after 9/11, although of course they haven’t been in any hurry to fill that gap by sacrificing anything unsolicited. Here’s their second chance: I want to see a fleet of these suckers in the Yearly Kos parking lot circa 2010. “Gaia” would want it that way.

I think having Al and Tipper roll up to Oslo City Hall next month in matching units — blue for him, perhaps a nice mauve for her, natch — would send quite the consciousness-raising statement, n’est-ce pas?

Say this much for them. They made it as cool-looking as something this lame can be.

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Ooooh a real-life lightcycle…take the ladies into the maze and all that, avoiding Recognizers along the way.

/nerdalert

Sir Loin on October 31, 2007 at 6:21 PM

Apparently their competitor is this car. I’m not sure how the expect to win that competition.

Buford on October 31, 2007 at 6:23 PM

All that’s missing is the Tron costume.

Tron costume?

Bad Candy on October 31, 2007 at 6:23 PM

How appropos. Al Gore SHOULD be riding a tri-cycle.

My collie says:

Yes, but he’s too rotund to fit in one of those things, donchathink’?

CyberCipher on October 31, 2007 at 6:23 PM

Eh, maybe a small content warning on that pic.

Bad Candy on October 31, 2007 at 6:24 PM

Eh, maybe a small content warning on that pic.

Bad Candy on October 31, 2007 at 6:24 PM

It’s okay. It IS Halloween, after all.

CyberCipher on October 31, 2007 at 6:25 PM

Bad Candy on October 31, 2007 at 6:23 PM

Dudes with camel toe are sexy!

lorien1973 on October 31, 2007 at 6:30 PM

Wow…

Single Seater (unless that’s a tiny back seat) – but then true dorks don’t need no stinking passenger seats anyway right?

All the vulnerability of a motorcycle with none of the maneuverability. Just imagine one of these vs a real life SUV at 70MPH.

CrazyFool on October 31, 2007 at 6:35 PM

Dorkmobile
A must have for dingy Harry.

By the by,
Bad Candy on October 31, 2007 at 6:23 PM,

God all mighty! What were you thinking?

leanright on October 31, 2007 at 6:44 PM

Cute,but can we shoe-horn some real American
power,say a chevy 572/572HP big block rat into it,
that way any Dork can be king of the block.Haha

canopfor on October 31, 2007 at 6:47 PM

I’m not trying to be offensive but you know your web site diversity meter is in the upper green zone when you’ve got a ventriloquist commenting.

Speakup on October 31, 2007 at 6:47 PM

Apparently their competitor is this car. I’m not sure how the expect to win that competition.

Buford on October 31, 2007 at 6:23 PM

This may provide a partial answer:

http://www.teslamotors.com/buy/buyPage1.php

CK MacLeod on October 31, 2007 at 6:51 PM

I can’t wait to see what it looks like after it collides with a big rig at high speed.

If you can even find the pieces, that is.

Evilwhiteguy on October 31, 2007 at 6:57 PM

I’ve always wanted a lightcycle. It can do 100mpg and 120MPH. Not shaby for a commuter car. And it BANKS!

Iblis on October 31, 2007 at 7:00 PM

God all mighty! What were you thinking?

leanright on October 31, 2007 at 6:44 PM

That I’d cause laughs for some and mild disturbance for others. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Bad Candy on October 31, 2007 at 7:00 PM

lorien1973 on October 31, 2007 at 6:30 PM

That’s called “mooseknuckle” ’round here.

TBinSTL on October 31, 2007 at 7:02 PM

I dunno. The spoiler on the back and the faux corvette detailing behind the door makes this one hot ride! Where can I test drive it……
[slap] [slap] [slap]
Oh, thanks. Where am I? I didn’t say something embarrassing did I?

Mallard T. Drake on October 31, 2007 at 7:02 PM

HOV lane baby!

Wait, 100mph? What’s the point of getting in an HOV lane when you can only go 100?!!

“Feels safer then a motorcyle.” Yeah, but that thing is just asking to be rolled. And due to the fact that it fells safer means it is twice as likely to roll.

- The Cat

P.S. I don’t want a pickle . .

MirCat on October 31, 2007 at 7:02 PM

Sorry, AP, I still think it’s cool. Now if it hovered

stonemeister on October 31, 2007 at 7:03 PM

MirCat on October 31, 2007 at 7:02 PM

“I just wanna ride on my motor……sicle”

TBinSTL on October 31, 2007 at 7:05 PM

Bad Candy on October 31, 2007 at 6:23 PM

Thanks. I just infected the rest of my office with that image!

Mallard T. Drake on October 31, 2007 at 7:06 PM

Yeah, wait until that thing collides with an 18-wheeler and see what’s left…

eanax on October 31, 2007 at 7:07 PM

Tron costume; spaz-trap; celibate men; enviroturds; a clean, green 100 mpg;I want to see a fleet of these suckers in the Yearly Kos parking lot circa 2010. “Gaia” would want it that way.

AP, your best writing yet. A poet and didn’t know it.
It’s writing like this that keeps me coming back!

RMCS_USN on October 31, 2007 at 7:08 PM

Apparently their competitor is this car. I’m not sure how the expect to win that competition.

Buford on October 31, 2007 at 6:23 PM

Unless you think $98,000 for a car is within everyone’s price range I think there will be a market for both. Of course the ‘smart car’ from Mercedes will be closer to $15,000 so I’d probably rather get one of those if my green side needed to be itched.

ThackerAgency on October 31, 2007 at 7:10 PM

Thanks. I just infected the rest of my office with that image!

Mallard T. Drake on October 31, 2007 at 7:06 PM

Heh.

Bad Candy on October 31, 2007 at 7:12 PM

Bad Candy on October 31, 2007 at 7:00 PM
If it’s humor you want, here’s a little ditty for ya.

Riding along in his Dorkmobile
and just like him, it has no apeal.

Two living beings is all it can carry,
One is V. Fox, the other is Harry.

Harry shrieks this car has no class!
Your sitting so close your things in my a$$.

You didn’t get amnesty to pass V.Fox moaned,
so as you did to my people I’ll give you the bone.

Next time try harder Fox said to this twit.
Because if it don’t, our votes you won’t get!

leanright on October 31, 2007 at 7:15 PM

Two words: Death trap.

That driver’s a goner in any crash with a Prius, a Neon, even a Geo.

Attila (Pillage Idiot) on October 31, 2007 at 7:17 PM

here’s a better demo.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g12_fhrHDSw

jummy on October 31, 2007 at 7:23 PM

I saw the Dutch version on Top Gear last year. It looked pretty fun to drive. Although, I think that the Dutch version had the two wheels in the front and one in the back.

robblefarian on October 31, 2007 at 7:34 PM

CrazyFool on October 31, 2007 at 6:35 PM

I’d rather be in the dorkmobile if it tips over at high speed.

Darth Executor on October 31, 2007 at 7:57 PM

Nah, the Dutch version had the same motorcycle wheel in front. They say its the same height and length of a Mini.

Iblis on October 31, 2007 at 7:59 PM

if these didn’t cost too much, it would be great for people that have a commute to work, by themselves. alot of people drive over an hour into a city to work.

jp on October 31, 2007 at 8:06 PM

And as a resident of the Bay Area, that HOV sticker scam is crap all it dose is create more congestion. I really don’t need one of these or a tesla banging away with all its got on i280 not letting me pass, just like the anemic hybrids. The Prius has already supplanted the low end Mercedes and bmws as the smug-persons car of choice. Now I have under powered carver(redundant) knock-offs to look forward to.

ug…

Praise the lord and pass the forced induction.

liquidflorian on October 31, 2007 at 8:27 PM

if these didn’t cost too much, it would be great for people that have a commute to work, by themselves. alot of people drive over an hour into a city to work.

jp on October 31, 2007 at 8:06 PM

*darth vader* NOOOOOOOO!!!!!! */darth vader* I commute to work in the bay area, and typically that can mean as much as a 100+ mile round trip. I don’t want to have to dodge these things on my way to work. The hybrids are bad enough. Fie on your Satan!

liquidflorian on October 31, 2007 at 8:32 PM

Allah, you’re crazy.

I’d totally buy one. And I’m not a celibate male. Tron FTW!

Vyce on October 31, 2007 at 8:53 PM

They’re unsafe. I’d run it over without ever seeing it.

“What was that? Did I just drive over something? I’d better get out and check my tires.”

CliffHanger on October 31, 2007 at 10:20 PM

I’ll drive one…won’t buy it, but I’d drive it if they gave it to me.

Getting laid or not, if I could have a car that has AC, that is enough for me. I drive a ’63 VW Bug, no AC.

Tim Burton on October 31, 2007 at 10:21 PM

There is a back seat. The back seat rider has to straddle the driver, though, like riding in a bobsled. The non-hybrid one will cost about $20,000, I think. Don’t remember how much the hybrid one costs, but it’s significantly more. No, I’m not in the market for one–I just noticed this thing while out surfing the web one day and was curious about it. I don’t think it’s as dorky as Allah does, but I do think it’s as unsafe on freeways as most of the commenters here do. I’m a minivan mom, so things like this are just a sci-fi curiosity to me. Couldn’t even put one bag of groceries in there, much less the 20 I usually bring home.

aero on October 31, 2007 at 10:43 PM

Shows promise. Tesla one ‘looks’ better, but this would be a pretty good commuter car.

Reaps on October 31, 2007 at 10:48 PM

Ah well, A few mods and I’d like one. Some kind of subdued paint job, 18 inch clearance, decent all-terrain tires, three wheel drive with a 4000 watt hub motor in each wheel, A two thousand Amp/hr capacity Lithium Nanophosphate battery pack with 115V plugin charging for ten-fifteen grand. I’d be in line to buy.

Don’t care about being a lonely geek. Three years ago I took all but the drivers seat out of my favorite ‘jeep type vehicle’ so as to discourage anyone wanting to come along.

LegendHasIt on November 1, 2007 at 1:10 AM

The original model didn’t fare too well.

(Pushers optional.)

profitsbeard on November 1, 2007 at 1:39 AM

I can’t wait to see what it looks like after it collides with a big rig at high speed.

Evilwhiteguy on October 31, 2007 at 6:57 PM

Probably pretty much like what a motorcycle looks like after the same treatment. Not sure what your point is…we’ve had motorcycles for over a century now.

James on November 1, 2007 at 7:33 AM

Apparently their competitor is this car. I’m not sure how the expect to win that competition.

Buford on October 31, 2007 at 6:23 PM

Pricepoint mostly. But Holy Crap, now thats some “green” innovation I could live with, assuming it isn’t all hype.

BKennedy on November 1, 2007 at 11:35 AM

Anyone else notice the H2 in the background? He might be hustling these things to the public, but at least he’s not completely stupid.

PJ Emeritus on November 1, 2007 at 1:59 PM

Like I’d give up my FLSTF for that thing.

Buzzy on November 1, 2007 at 2:03 PM